Not Like The Other Niggas Episode 26:

"Employers Must Be Idiots + This Is Why I'm A Pessimist"

Recorded on September 17, 2008

One day after Mary Anne shit all over Karl's precious, heart-on-the-sleeve and brutally honest cover letter draft, Karl delivers the clapback rant and goes over Mary Anne's (and employers) fucking flawed logic when it comes to dealing with a hard-working, but unorthodox thinker like Karl.

Also, fuck your optimism. Stop telling Karl to magically be optimistic when he hardly has the life experience to make him so. Optimism comes from positive life experiences. Not the other way around. And it certainly doesnt come from not having friends, not having a girlfriend, not having a job, being fearmongered about diabetes and so on. And Karl explains that in this episode.

Songs Played:

Van Halen - "Mean Street" ... from their "Unchained" album
Billy Squier - "Don't Say No"

Not Like The Other Niggas Episode 25:

"Mary Anne Is A Fucking Bitch! (Live)"

Recorded on September 16, 2008.

Ah yes... another "(live)" recording from one of Karl's appointments with Mary Anne.

After being rejected by minimum wage jobs over and over and over and over and FUCKING OVER again, and for no fucking reason of his own that he can think of, Karl finally decides to write... an "interesting" cover letter to attach the applications for some the dipshit businesses who evidently don't know how to hire the right people.

Karl figures that since he won that Cover Letter contest with Voices Against Violence, which included some personal takes and words, that he should just go full throttle and let it rip... besides, what does he have to lose? When Karl *DIDN'T* take this approach, he still failed, so he may as well get a little personal now and see what happens.

However, Karl's therapist/counselor for the past 2 years has a differing opinion...

"Not Like The Other Niggas, 2008-2009, Episode 24:

"My Life Did (and Still Does) Suck"

Recorded On September 3, 2008

***Karl's First Post-High School Recording***

A recap of Karl's summer and how his life is going.

Karl talks a little bit about the two concerts he went to over the summer, Metal Masters w/Judas Priest and CrueFest w/Motley Crue. Karl notes that older people are a HELL of a lot more fun than people around his age. He had a blast at the Priest concert.

But at Cruefest, especially with such a younger crowd, due to the bands that opened, Karl felt a different vibe. People weren't quite as welcoming as they were at Priest. No one was (intentionally) rude, but just... indifferent to Karl, which made it harder to make friends. And add to that, the fact that there were COUPLES EVERYWHERE. It was almost as if God was just rubbing Karl's loneliness in his face.

Karl also discusses the bullshit of applying for jobs at lazy ass companies that dont take the time to interview their applicants, instead opting to make their applicants do shitty ass, worthless UNICRU personality questionnaires. What the fuck??? And he also talks about the updates of what went down with ACORN and how SCA helped save his summer.

But alas, school's not just out for summer, but it is out forever and with no college plans, no job, and his mom nagging him about the seemingly unobtainable goal of getting a job... things aren't looking too bright...

Song Played:

Dio - "Rainbow In The Dark"

NLTON, 2008-2009, Episode 23:

"I Knew It Wouldn't Last"

***FINAL HIGH SCHOOL-ERA EPISODE***

Recorded in June 2008.

After busting his fucking ass for the past month or so to get nearly every single goddamn worthless school project finished and turned in, as well as a little bonus project in Journalism, Ms. Renner cant help but be a cunt to Karl because he decided to spend a fucking FREE PERIOD on the SnipeMe and the National Youth Rights Association (NYRA) forum. 

Sucks having a teacher who is on the rag. Damn!

Also, after giving the Student Conservation Association (SCA) an A plus performance last year, Karl gets rejected by them the following year.  What the fucking fuck???

So with nowhere to go (and no, Foodland never called back), after he gets approached by a canvasser about registering to vote and talked to about the opportunity to work, Karl goes ahead and tries to work for a company that you may have heard of... called ACORN.

Songs Played:

Judas Priest - "Hell Patrol"
Pantera - "Cowboys From Hell"

NLTON, 2008-2009, Episode 22:

"Today... I Had A Good Day"

Recorded on May 28, 2008

After all of the bitching and moaning about stupid shit for so many recordings... Karl has to talk about the good shit, too.

For nearly 2 years at Carrick High School, the only things Karl was recognized for was a dumb gimmick character and his duffel bag.  But this time, he, along with many others were finally recognized for something pretty cool. And got a breakfast buffet out of it!

Also, the exciting results of the Cover Letter Contest for Voices Against Violence!

Karl also gets screwed over on an English class presentation, but with the help of a damn good teacher, Mr. Kocur, he finds an... unconventional (for him, at least) way of handling the situation.

Also, Karl fucks up and misses a test in his science class and his teacher wont allow him to make it up... or will he?

And last, but MOST DEFINITELY not least, Paul The [censored]got fucks with Karl one last time... but this time, an unlikely ally sticks up for Karl to try to put an end to Paul's stupid ass bullshit.

This is probably the most feelgood recording you'll ever get from Karl.  The amazing events of this recording probably even made Karl cry... and those are 2008 Karl's words.

Songs Played:

Motley Crue - "Kickstart My Heart"
Scorpions - "I Can't Explain"

21. Flagf[censored]s Are [censored]gs

Recorded on May 9, 2008

Karl was 17 years old when he had the following thoughts as a second-class American citizen:

"I can't vote."
"I can't drink."
"I hardly have freedom of speech."
"I can't purchase a gun."
"I can't run for office."

... along with many other things.  But its not just Karl.  No one under 18 can do these things... these so called "freedoms" that we're entitled to as natural-born citizens of America. 

"So why the fuck am I saying this pledge?"

Thats a good ass question.  And the only answer that Karl could come up with was that he was brainwashed into it at a very early age.  But that was gonna change in November 2007.

When Karl stopped standing for the praye... I mean, pledge, his 1st period teacher... you guessed it, Ms. Renner, demanded that he stand outside while the pledge was being recited during the morning announcements.  Karl obliged.

6 months later, that dickhead, Paul, asks Karl why he goes outside for the announcements and like a dumbass, Karl tells the truth, thinking that Paul would be respectful enough of his opinion and beliefs.

Lol.

After telling the story of what went down in first period and later on, eighth period, Karl decides that he wasn't angry enough during this recording, so he decides to set fire to the American flag that he had written all over and defaced years ago to use as the cover of his 10th grade diary. 

Some thumbs, bugs and flags were harmed during the recording of this episode.

Songs Played:

Marilyn Manson - "The Beautiful People"
Marilyn Manson - "Irresponsible Hate Anthem"

Not Like The Other Niggas, 2008-2009, Episode 20:

"A Foodland Application"

Recorded on May 7, 2008

Karl actually isn't going to rant this time, but instead, is filling out a job application for a grocery store. Surely, he is capable of stocking a fucking shelf, right?

Listen as Karl reads the questions on the job application and tells you exactly what he wrote down.

By the way, some of these questions are fucking stupid.

Also, certain answers are censored due to privacy.

Songs Played:

Judas Priest - "The Rage"
Judas Priest - "Rapid Fire"
Judas Priest - "Steeler"

We are now at the HALFWAY MARK, folks!

NLTON, 2008-2009 Episode 19:

"Rants On Human Stupidity"

Recorded on May 5, 2008

Karl talks about his job hunting woes, wondering how in the LIVING FUCK it is possible to turn in over 20 applications and not be "good enough" to be a goddamn burger flipper.  He even ponders the idea of putting his writing skills to use to create a satirical cover letter because fuck it, these retards wont hire him anyway.

Also, Voices Against Violence are bums.  "Bald Headed Dude" had the nerve to tell Karl that his checks will be withheld until his grades start improving.  Well, the grades have gone up... so where are you [censored]gers with his money?

Also, for someone who talked a big game about "creativity" earlier in the school year, Ms. Renner sure is doing quite the about-face in regards to Karl's essay-collage project involving "The Invisible Man."

And another thing, fuck you if you think Karl's moving slow in the hallway!

Songs Played:

Skid Row - "Slave To The Grind"
Skid Row - "The Threat"

NLTON, 2008-2009 Episode 18: Shane Is A Bitch-Ass Cunt

After months of goofing around and throwing paper balls at each other, etc., it has come time for Shane to be on his period. Now and only now does he have a big fucking problem with paper balls being thrown at him by Karl.

Shane retaliates (rather overwhelmingly) and while Karl decides to be a nice guy and let it slide, he lays out exactly what he will do to Shane if the little bitch decides to keep escalating.

Songs Played:

Motley Crue - "Bastard"
Motley Crue - "Shout At The Devil"

NLTON, 2008-2009 Episode 17:

Getting My Meds (The Appointment)

Recorded in April 2008.

I apologize for the shitty sound quality. The voices are barely audible at times and because of the shit quality of my mp3 player at the time, there appears to be a BUNCH of background static/noise.

But the basic lowdown is this:

A few recordings ago, Karl stated that he was finally ready to give anti-depressants a try, and now its the big day! Karl arrives at the Behavioral Health institution for his appointment and his school therapist, Mary Anne, meets him there.

The doctor asks Karl a series of standard questions and gives him a sheet to fill out. Karl completes the "not test" with the help of Mary Anne. Afterwards, Karl is prescribed Zoloft. Now all thats left is to tell Mom about it... and eat Mary's snacks... because Karl is a hungry boy.