NOT REALLY

Live from New York City's COVID-19 quarantine, it's your worst nightmare! We try a new recording method and—surprise!—it doesn't work out in our favor. (Apologies for the audio on this episode...if you complain about it, you're getting blocked!!!) This episode we discuss the Weinstein sentencing, Sherry Pie's sadistic catfishing, what happens when game shows unwittingly become true crime documentaries, the doxxing of Ru, cancel queens, Bernie's decision to stay in the 2020 democratic primary, the elite conspiracy against the poor, why corporations and big lobbyists want Coronavirus to kill you, the defaming of Jordan Wolfson, the importance of transgression in art, lame narratives, mediocre imposters, and your cynical gaze...

Subscribe to our Patreon! Not US, YOU! http://www.patreon.com/notreally

It's not-so-super Wednesday and Patrik is on fire! We address our previous comments on fibromyalgia, the attention economy and what celebrities will stoop to for relevance, Gaga's new single, the "time to be hated," and Hillary Clinton's pathological narcissism. We also devote the majority of the episode to SUPER TUESDAY, Biden's perceived comeback, underdogs and frontrunners, the pageantry of the democratic primary, narratives and who spins them (and who buys them), Biden's backroom deals with multi-billion-dollar lobbyists, Elizabeth Warren's endgame and insights into her suspicious political ambitions courtesy of feminist scholar Drucilla Cornell, respectability politics, being stereotyped into a voting block, why Bernie still has a shot, what you can do, and how we can help him win, what to say to your friends and family, and how to stay strong and push through! We also touch on the new season of Drag Race, our upcoming merch, and more!

Subscribe to Not Really on Patreon at http://www.patreon.com/notreally

By extremely popular demand, beauty consultant to the stars Alexis Page is back on the podcast to take all (or most) of our listener questions about all things glam: products, skincare, chemicals, French pharmaceuticals, hype brands, moisturizers, lip, teeth, eyes, hair, chins, backs, wrinkles, neck lines, fillers, contouring, dark circles, you name it! Got a problem? Get in line! You may want a pen and paper to take notes on all the products that get mentioned in this extravaganza of drugstore goops you'll need to be an unclockable spook in the geish while shoplifting at Sephora. We also get to the bottom of how much it will cost to launch our own beauty brand. Patreon subscribers, step those pledges up.

Subscribe to our Patreon for the full episode at http://www.patreon.com/notreally!

We're back on our bullshit, throwing ourselves into a rapidfire roulette discussion of the week's pressing controversies, microscandals, and misunderstandings: the moral majority attacks on South Park and Salò, Jameela's Munchausen, Wendy's anti-gay remarks, Richard Dawkins's eugenics proposal, Donald Trump's review of the Oscars, Rosario Dawson's queer baiting, Scott Bixby's Daily Beast story, the deplatforming of Ben Mora, New York's missing winter, Judge Judy's Bloomberg hysteria, the death of Gummy Bear Davis, and Angelyne's new producing career. We also dive into the democratic primary and debunk some of the arguments against Bernie Sanders. Paul embraces his inner Bernie Bro and gets kicked off Twitter. Patrik explores the psychic delusions of the relational health care economy.

We also talk Netflix's Love Is Blind and explore the devastating pathology of Jessica, a cypher for aging single women everywhere. We also parse Carlton's bisexual dilemma and Paul explains the double standard of the bi-nary.

Join our Patreon for a new episode this week, featuring our beauty guru Alexis Page! http://www.patreon.com/notreally

Patrik and Paul cozy up in bed at the Marlton Hotel with our love guru Kalena Yiaueki and special guest, Succession star Annabelle Dexter-Jones! We take listener Valentine's Day questions and dive into true romance, covering topics like hygiene, the coronavirus, sexting on planes, airdrop harassment, detransitioning for jobs, stalker behavior, frozen auras, "thawing out," grand gestures, Ali Wise's felony indictment over hacking the voicemails of her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriends, PDA, relationships on Instagram, exhibitionism versus shitposting, the three attachment styles, couples astrology, germaphobia, taking PrEP+, ass shots, our own love lives, general dysfunction, and former Real Housewife of New York Carole Radziwill phones in to answer a question about—what else?—blowjobs!

We hope you had a nice Valentine's Day, head over to our patreon to subscribe to special episodes at http://www.patreon.com/notreally

It's our 50th episode! Listen as we play dead with superstar stylist, creative director of Interview Magazine, and New York City legend-in-the-making Mel Ottenberg and writer, director of the Gladstone Gallery, and co-host of the podcast The C Word with Lena Dunham, Alissa Bennett! We lounge around in Mel's ultrafabulous apartment right before the Oscars to discuss death, glamour, and rap sheets, along with topics as varied and psychically harrowing as haunted botany, possessed rats, 1970s design, Jim Walrod, IF Boutique Soho, Kenny Kenny, Candy Charms, Voluma Galore, Astro Erle, lip injections, dying alone, scary dolls, Sculptra, Alissa's late '90s modeling career, i-D magazine, Hussein Chalayan, dangerous beauties, bad actresses, Blake Lively, Judy Garland, Janis Joplin, Jackie Jorpjump, gossip, gangbangs, J.Lo's halftime show, O.J.'s bronco chase, Sante Kimes, Vanity Fair, Dominick Dunne, glamour grifters, our own personal arrest records, Renee Zellweger's Oscar dresses, Jennifer Lopez's acting career, Rosie Perez on the witness stand, Harvey Weinstein's trial, and so much gossip between the lines we had to make this two episodes! Head over to patreon.com/notreally for Part 2, our very first MURDER SPECIAL you won't want to miss.

FOR EPISODE 1 go to Patreon.com/notreally

The guys are joined by Chapo Trap House's Amber A'Lee Frost and legendary drag superstar The Lady Bunny! Listen as they hole up in a luxury hotel suite on Central Park South to discuss American political corruption, Pamela Anderson, the dems' conspiracy against Bernie Sanders, political awakenings, social media, surviving the AIDS crisis, Fox News afterparties, Wigstock, old drag versus new drag, and Bunny's decades-long career serving as the unofficial face (and wig) of New York City while sticking to the seditious underground ethos that drew her to the drag scene to begin with. Check out The Lady Bunny in the HBO documentary Wig, and for more of Amber, support Chapo Trap House at http://www.patreon.com/chapotraphouse! Special thanks to Anna & Dasha for making this happen!

On a very serious, politically-charged episode, we explore the human rights crisis of Jennifer Lopez being snubbed by the Academy Awards. Did she deserve to be nominated? We also explore Elizabeth Warren's lowlife smear of Bernie Sanders, the migraine-inducing Netflix reality series "The Circle," the topsy turvy reality denying RuPaul series AJ and the Queen, the wigs at COMME des GARÇONS, Paris Fashion Week highlights and "highlights," Vince Vaughn's brush with Donald Trump, Amelia Bedelia, listener comments, and a sneak peak of our next Patreon which will have your wig spinning.

For more Not Really subscribe at http://www.patreon.com/notreally

It's officially ELECTION YEAR so we brought back political animal Steven Phillips-Horst to give us the lay of the land. We discuss Iran's missile "accident," World War 3, the Iowa caucuses, Mayor Pete's military background, Chasten's casting process, gay dating apps, Cameron Diaz's legacy, how to fight dirty in battleground states, Yang's tech bro problemo, blue checkmarks, emoji armies, Gina Carano (why?), Soderbergh actresses (why not?) MEGXIT, the allure of capitalism over nobility, Grimes's pregnancy, and why Bernie is the candidate, the only candidate, why he will win, and how to help.

Go to www.patreon.com/notreally for the full episode!