Rules can feel like constant battles in autism parenting— especially when you’re repeating yourself, feeling frustrated, and wondering why things that should be simple just aren’t clicking.

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mompodcast, Shannon Urquiola breaks down why rules without context often don’t work for autistic children — and why that isn’t defiance, disrespect, or failure.

You’ll learn:

• Why phrases like “you know better” and “because I said so” often backfire
• How stress, overwhelm, and regulation impact your child’s ability to follow rules
• Why timing matters — and why something that doesn’t work now may work later
• How to explain rules in ways your child’s brain can actually receive
• Practical, real-life ways to support rule learning over time without shame or power struggles

If rules have been exhausting in your home, this episode will feel like a deep exhale — and a new way forward.

This episode is a reminder that your child isn’t ignoring rules — they’re navigating a world full of invisible expectations. Andyour job isn’t to enforce harder, but to explain more clearly.

🌟 Leave a Review: If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection. 

Together, we can overcome challenges and create abrighter future for our families.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? Want towork with me?  When you're ready to take control and see different results in your life, check out our private membership at ⁠⁠Not Your Average Autism Mom⁠⁠

Access exclusive support, training, and resources tosave you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands. Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us totalk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠

If you’ve ever found yourself wondering, “Why can’t theyjust remember what I said?”—this episode is for you.

Because sometimes, holding it together meansunderstanding why their brain can’t always hold on.

Have you listened to these episodes yet?

⁠⁠157. Reframing Defeat: Your Child’s Progress is Closer Than You Think⁠⁠

⁠⁠83. Assessing Your Child’s IEP

Advocacy isn’t a phase of autism parenting—it’s a long-term role that evolves from diagnosis through adulthood. And for many moms, it can feel exhausting, overwhelming, and never-ending.

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, Shannon Urquiola walks you through what advocacy really looks like across every stage of the autism parenting journey—from early intervention and school years to adulthood,siblings, and families parenting non-speaking autistic children.

This is an honest, encouraging conversation about:

• Why advocacy changes over time
• How to advocate without burning out
• Supporting children who cannot advocate for themselves
• Navigating advocacy inside your family, including siblings
• Letting go of the pressure to “do it all” and learning how to keep going

If you’ve ever wondered how you’re supposed to sustain advocacy for the long haul, this episode is for you.

🌟 Leave a Review:

If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughtsand experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

We can overcome challenges and create a brighter future forour families.

P.S.- Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our Not Your Average Autism Mom private membership.

Access exclusive support, training, and resources to saveyou a ton of time, and a community that truly understands.

Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be!⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠  ⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Details HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ 

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠⁠⁠ groupon FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talkabout on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Have you listened to these episodes yet?  

222. ⁠Locked Pantries and Naked Kids; Autism Parenting Chronicles⁠

223. ⁠What to Do When They Say No (Special Education Edition)⁠

Autism parenting changes you.
Not just how you parent — but how you think, how you feel, and how you move through the world.

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, Shannon Urquiola talks honestly about the parts of this journey we don’t always say out loud — losing pieces ofyourself, living in survival mode, feeling isolated even in a room full of people, and carrying fears about the future that never fully quiet.

This conversation isn’t about fixing anything.
It’s about understanding what’s been happening inside you — and why that matters.

You’ll hear about:

• how survival mode slowly becomes your normal
• why identity loss and exhaustion are not personal failures
• how love and grief can exist at the same time
• the moments that shift everything

and how coaching can change how you experience autism parenting — even when nothing around you changes

✨ Coaching RESET Workshop
If this episode resonated and you’re feeling emotionally fried, stuck on high alert, or like you’ve lost yourself along the way, Shannon invites you to join her live RESET Coaching Workshop.

Four hours of real coaching, created specifically for moms raising autistic children, to help you:

• slow the mental noise
• stop spiraling in worst-case thinking
• feel more grounded in the middle of hard days
• and show up with more calm and confidence in real life

👉 Get the details HERE

If you’ve been feeling exhausted, stuck, or like you’ve lost yourself somewhere along the way, this episode is for you.

🌟 Leave a Review:

If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parentsto find inspiration and connection.

We can overcome challenges and create a brighter future for our families.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our Not Your Average Autism Mom privatemembership.

Want more support? Find ways we can help at ⁠www.notyouraverageautismmom.com⁠ for ongoing guidance, coaching, and exclusive resources!

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email usat ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

Have you listened to these episodes yet?

40. The Impact of Mind Blindness 

109. Why Waiting is So Difficult 

All-or-nothing thinking is one of the most common — and most damaging — thought patterns I see in autism parenting.

If today is hard, it suddenly feels like everything is hard. If your child is struggling, it feels impossible for you to beokay.
And over time, hope, joy, and motivation quietly slip away.

In this episode, we’re diving deep into how all-or-nothing thinking shows up when you’re raising an autistic child — not because you’re negative or doing something wrong, but because your body has learned to live on high alert.

When unpredictability becomes your norm, your nervoussystem adapts. And when the body doesn’t feel safe, connection, flexibility, and perspective shut down.

In this episode, I share:
• Real examples of what all-or-nothing thinking looks like in daily autism parenting
• Why this isn’t a mindset failure — it’s a nervous system response
• How chronic stress keeps moms stuck in survival mode
• Coaching strategies I use to help moms move out of misery without pretending life is easy
• The reframe that changes everything: “Your body didn’t break. It adapted.”

We are not downplaying how hard this journey is —because it is hard.
But you do have a choice not to live your life in misery.

I’ll also share why I created the RESET Coaching Workshop and how it helps moms regulate their nervous system, extreme thinking, and reconnect with themselves again — without guilt or pressure.

👉Get the details for the RESET Coaching Workshop HERE

If you’ve been feeling exhausted, stuck, or like you’velost yourself somewhere along the way, this episode is for you.

🌟 Leave a Review:

If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughtsand experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

We can overcome challenges and create a brighter futurefor our families.

P.S. Want more support? Find ways we can help at ⁠www.notyouraverageautismmom.com⁠ for ongoing guidance, coaching, and exclusive resources!

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

Have you listened to these episodes yet?

 ⁠⁠74. You Cannot Fix All the Things ALL the Time⁠ 

 ⁠201. Breaking Barriers; Why Low Expectations Hold Our Kids Back⁠ 

Medication decisions are some of the hardest choices autism parents ever face — and they’re rarely simple.

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, Shannon Urquiola takes a deep, honest dive into medication and autism, sharing both professional insight and decades of lived experience.

This episode covers:

• Why medication does not treat autism — but may help treat co-existing challenges like anxiety, impulsivity, sleep issues, and emotional dysregulation

• The emotional weight of deciding whether to medicate (and why there is no one “right” answer)

• Common medications used, what they’re often prescribed for, and why responses vary so widely

• Real-life experiences with side effects, dosage changes, tics, weight gain, and setbacks

• Why data matters — and how tracking behaviors can prevent all-or-nothing thinking

• Personal stories from Shannon’s journey with Jordan, including what helped, what didn’t, and what changed over time

This episode is compassionate, real, and judgment-free — because medication decisions are family decisions, and shame has no place here.

If this episode resonated with you and you’re feeling emotionally worn down, stuck in survival mode, or unsure how to move forward with confidence, I want to personally invite you to my RESET Workshop on January 31st.

This live workshop is designed to help you pause, reset your nervous system, reconnect with yourself, and learn how to navigate hard decisions without guilt or overwhelm. It’s intentionally priced at $14.95 to make support accessible — and it’s included at no charge for Not Your Average Autism Mom members.
👉 Learn more and register here: https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/change-the-way-you-show-up-in-2026

🌟 Leave a Review: If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our private membership. Access exclusive support, training, and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands. Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be.   ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠

Have you listened to these episodes yet?

1⁠⁠29. Getting a Grip on Escalating Behaviors⁠⁠

⁠⁠158. Navigating Hygiene Struggles; Path to Cleanliness

How do you teach stranger danger to autistic kids — without creating fear?

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mom Podcast, Shannon Urquiola dives into a topic so many parents worry about but rarely feel confident navigating. Inspired by a question from a follower, Valencia Shannon, this episode explores what “stranger danger” really looks like for autistic children and why traditional advice often falls short.

Shannon walks you through:

• Why autistic kids experience safety, fear, and impulse control differently
• How to teach safe vs. unsafe situations instead of relying on fear-based messaging
• Real life scenarios you can practice with your child in public, at school and online
• The very real dangers of online gaming, social platforms and sextortion
• Why supervision and monitoring are not about control — they're about protection

Shannon also shares personal stories about her son Jordan, including why, at 29, safety planning and supervision are still necessary due to impulse control and lack of fear — and how meeting your child where they are is not failure, it’s love.

💙 For moms in the Not Your Average Autism Mom privatemembership:
Two parent resource downloads are available in the portal and the Village resource section to support you with online monitoring tools.

This episode is compassionate, practical, and honest — because teaching safety doesn’t have to come from fear. It comes from preparation.

🌟 Leave a Review: If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Yourfeedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

Together, we can overcome challenges and create a brighter future for our families.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our private membership.

Access exclusive support, training and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands. Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be!  

Get Details HERE

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠

Don't miss these episodes...

217. Your Words Matter: Raising Resilient Kids

110. Have You Ever Secretly Hated Autism?

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, host Shannon Urquiola wraps up 2025 with a powerful conversation about what it really means to find your people when you’re raising an autistic child.

Inspired by a request from a NYAAM member, Shannon shares real stories from her own journey with Jordan and Maddie and talks about why surface-level friendships aren’t enough in this life. This episode dives into vulnerability, honesty, and the willingness it takes to be seen — and why trying to do it all alone often leads to isolation and burnout.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why “I’m fine” friendships don’t hold up in autism parenting

• How hiding behind a façade keeps you lonely, even when you’re surrounded by people

• What it looks like to step out of your comfort zone and ask for help

• How sharing your story helps other moms feel less alone — and helps you find your people

• Why this journey was never meant to be carried alone

This is the final episode of 2025. Shannon will be back every Thursday in 2026, starting with episode 252 on January 8th.

If you’ve ever felt unseen, misunderstood, or alone in this journey, this episode will remind you that your people are out there — and you don’t have to stop searching.

📺 Now available on video too! Watch on this podcast page or Spotify, or listen as always—whichever way you tune in, we’re just glad you’re here.

Thank you for being a part of this incredible journey with us! Together, we are stronger.

🌟 Leave a Review: If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our private membership. Access exclusive support, training, and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands. Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be.   ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠

Have you listened to these episodes yet?

1⁠⁠29. Getting a Grip on Escalating Behaviors⁠⁠

⁠⁠158. Navigating Hygiene Struggles; Path to Cleanliness

In this milestone 250th episode, Shannon sits down for one of the most honest, heartfelt conversations she’s ever had on the podcast — a conversation she wishes someone could have had with her 20 years ago.

If you’ve ever wondered whether things will get better…
If you’ve ever felt like you’re failing…

If you’ve ever questioned your strength, your patience, or your progress… This episode is for you.

Shannon shares the real truth about how this journey changes over time — not because autism goes away, but because you grow, your child grows, and the lessons you learn along the way slowly reshape everything.

Inside, she talks about:

• why your motherhood was never meant to look like anyone else’s

• what actually gets easier (and what doesn’t)

• how to stop bracing for every meltdown

• the moment she realized she didn’t have to join Jordan’s storm

• celebrating the small wins that become the big wins

• and how to stop carrying this journey alone

You’ll hear a brand-new story from Shannon’s week — a story of growth, family dinner, dysregulation, humor, and a moment that would have shattered the entire night years ago but didn’t… because time and lessons really do change things.

Whether you’re on Episode 1 or Episode 250, you belong here.
This episode will help you breathe a little deeper, judge yourself a little less, and remember that you are doing better than you think.

🌟 Leave a Review:

If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

We can overcome challenges and create a brighter future for our families.

P.S.Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our Not Your Average Autism Mom private membership.

Access exclusive support, training, and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands.

Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be!⁠⁠⁠⁠  

⁠⁠Get Details HERE⁠⁠ ⁠ 

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠

Have you listened to these episodes yet? 

⁠⁠⁠218. Planning for the Unplanned; A Legacy of Care⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠137. Explaining our Children’s Differences⁠ 

— A Holiday Pep Talk

If you’ve ever dreaded the question “What does he want for Christmas?” this episode is for you.
In Episode 249 of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, Shannon sits down for a heartfelt, honest conversation about gift-giving when your autistic child doesn’t like toys, doesn’t care about unwrapping presents, or doesn’t connect with gifts the way the world expects.

In this episode, Shannon shares:— Why your child isn’t “missing out”— Why practical gifts absolutely count— The freedom in skipping wrapping paper— How to talk to grandparents, aunts, uncles, and siblings— Real-life scenarios you’ll face—and how to handle them— How to release the guilt and drop the pressure to have a “typical” holiday— What embracing YOUR version of Christmas can look and feel like

If the holidays bring up stress, comparison, or worry that you’re “doing it wrong,” this episode will bring relief and perspective. Your family’s Christmas gets to look the way you need it to—and yes, Mama, that is more than enough.

🌟 Leave a Review:

If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

We can overcome challenges and create a brighter future for our families.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our Not Your Average Autism Mom private membership.

Access exclusive support, training, and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands.

Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be!⁠⁠⁠
 Get Details HERE

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠

Have you listened to these episodes yet? 

⁠⁠129. Getting a Grip on Escalating Behaviors⁠⁠

⁠⁠124. What to Do When They Say No (Special Education Edition)

In this episode of the Not Your Average Autism Mom podcast, host Shannon Urquiola continues her holiday series with a conversation every autism parent needs before the real chaos hits—what to do after you completely lose your lane.

Because no matter how hard you work on staying calm, holding boundaries, and choosing your lane… there will still be moments where you snap, shut down, or say somethingyou regret. Especially during the holidays.

Shannon also shares a behind-the-scenes update on writing her book and how revisiting the hardest moments of this journey has been both healing and really, really hard.

If even one idea from this episode helps you walk into the holidays with a little more grace for yourself and less pressure to “get it right,” that’s a win.

🌟 Leave a Review:

If this episode resonates with you, share your thoughts and experiences by leaving a review. Your feedback supports the podcast and creates a space for other parents to find inspiration and connection.

P.S. Feeling overwhelmed and ready for a change? When you're ready to take control and see different results, check out our Not Your Average Autism Mom private membership.

Access exclusive support, training, and resources to save you a ton of time, and a community that truly understands.

Join us and discover how amazing this journey can be!⁠
https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/⁠⁠⁠

Additional Resources:

Join ⁠⁠The Not Your Average Autism Mom Movement⁠⁠ group on FB

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at ⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠

Have you listened to these episodes yet?

⁠133. Beyond Helicopter Parenting, Fostering Independence

212. When Progress Pauses; Regression 101