Not Your Enemy

Have you ever been annoyed by people who call themselves life coaches? Rebecca has often judged "self-help" practitioners and program facilitators who claim to help you level up in life. They can sometimes ego trip, or give you advice that's not suited to you, make you dependent on them, or take advantage of your money.Carmen Gerlach works as an engineer by day, but she's starting her own practice as a Relationship Systems Coach. She's a good friend of Rebecca's and despite Rebecca's typical prejudices she has successfully practiced a lot of techniques with Rebecca that have helped her life. She's not the person you think of -- presenting the answer's to life on Instagram -- and there's actually a lot of reasons for this that we dive into in this episode. We cover what all the pitfalls are and what elements make a life coach a *real* coach, and not just a persuasive person. Note: We made a slight error on the number of coaches in the International Coaching Foundation. There are 125k CoActive coaches and ICF has 50-60k.

If there’s something you want to say on the pod, reach out to [email protected].

Lyonel Laverde and Rebecca are conservative and liberal, respectively, but they agree on the need for integrity, discernment, openness, and respect when it comes to navigating politics. In this episode of The Minefield, they discuss how they each stand by their values, what it means for voters and political leaders to have integrity, and the idea of the "mushy middle". They offer an example of how to talk about politics with friends across the aisle and how to maintain constructive attitudes in the midst of immense political unrest.

The Minefield is an episode format that is focused on conversations with people across the aisle, politically or otherwise.

Many women are raised to believe that men are meant to have more power than them, and some women continue to hold onto this in various contexts, especially when it comes to voicing their opinions. For a lot of us, this has created patterns that have undermined our own power and self esteem, and sometimes caused us to end up in dangerous situations. In this episode, Rebecca and her close friend Nicole Netti talk about what they were taught, what they've experienced, the level of power they want, and how Nicole has managed to find her voice amidst the contradictions and obstacles. You can find Nicole on Tiktok at @petty_netti

Religions often ask for people to believe in what they cannot see, and many argue that science and faith are not compatible. But what if you are committed to both, and which wins out in the end if there's a conflict? In this episode, Rebecca interviews her father, an engineer, on how he came to his Christian faith, how he understands his faith through logic and science, and how he handles discrepancies and grey areas. We discuss the role of humility and the value of consulting other minds when things are not always obvious.

Comedians have been telling political jokes for centuries, but in today's landscape, political comedy threatens to limit a comic's audience or livelihood. Where do you draw the line in order to keep getting booked and how do you maintain a reputation that people will pay for?

Comedian Harrison Friedman and Rebecca talk about his political journey from Zionism to democratic socialism and his stance on comedy both politically and personally.

Single people, and especially single women, are scrutinized a lot. There’s the idea that there must be something wrong -- with you or with your ability to choose or commit to someone. And maybe there is something about you, your choices, or your relationship to commitment, involved. But it doesn’t have to be a problem. Some people like being un-partnered. It doesn’t matter if it’s something you actively chose or something you’ve chosen to embrace; a lot of people are coming to prefer living “alone” to being in a relationship that’s not optimal. In this episode Joanne Morton and Rebecca talk about some of those preferences, choices people make along the way, and the varied ways you can find company and pleasure in this life. Watch Joanne’s content on YouTube @FCWSociety and learn what it means to be a Fucking Cool Woman. Find out more at fcwsociety.com and subscribe to the FCW Society substack: fcwsociety.substack.com

In our first political episode, Rebecca, a liberal, meets with Tim and his sister Kristin to talk about the hate they get for being Christian conservatives. We get into perceptions, fear, power, and the importance of context to achieve understanding.

Bonnie is the owner and director of a theater company in Savannah, Performers for Social Justice Awareness. Her productions span topics from race inequality to religious fervor to female relationships. Needless to say, it's an interesting time and place to produce this kind of work, and not without its challenges. Bonnie and Rebecca were first introduced when they were placed next to each other in the Savannah Philharmonic chorus. They’ve since become friends and artistic allies, and have watched (and helped) each other advance each other's mission. In this episode, we talk about launching Performers for Social Justice Awareness, the challenges Bonnie's faced with it — including the state of the political landscape — and how to approach an emotionally exhausted audience.--You can find Performers for Social Justice Awareness on FB: www.facebook.com/justiceawareness2016

Lavon and Rebecca met through their shared love for performance. When they met, Rebecca didn’t know one of Lavon’s most pronounced challenges: that he has a stutter. In this episode, Lavon opens about what it’s meant for him to stutter as a child and as an adult, how it manifests, and how it affects his relationship to other people and opportunities. They discuss how just one affectation can change the course of your life, and what it’s like when you are divergent from the norm, but not in a protected group. And they explore how to find power over a source of shame.You can find Lavon Youins on Facebook, if you're lucky enough to become his friend. You might also see him act in productions by the Savannah Readers Theatre, led by Bonnie Brault.

Nichelle and Rebecca met once at a networking event and ended up in a conversation about the forbidden nature of death. Nichelle shared that she'd recently experienced a sudden loss in her family that brought her closer to the realities of death, even beyond grief. It also made her more aware of how little we talk about death and end-of-life planning in our culture.In this episode, Rebecca and Nichelle explore each other's personal relationships to death, including losing loved ones, facing mortality, and preparing for our own eventual passing.You can find Nichelle on Instagram @nichest and on Substack nichelle.substack.com.