Old Millennials Remember Movies

Wait, how many days until Halloween? Oh, good, there's a super-easy-to-remember-and-not-at-all-annoying jingle to keep the dates in mind.

Once the disregarded afterthought of the "Halloween" franchise, "Halloween III: Season of the Witch" has become the cult curiosity it always deserved to be. No murderous Michael Myers in this one (unless you count a brief appearance for a commercial of the 1978 original film). Instead we have a "season of the witch," or more accurately, a supernatural/technological threat that has only a tangential relationship to "witchcraft." Shoot, the song "Season of the Witch" isn't here either, but look! Stonehenge! Goo-filled robots! Snakes coming out of mouths!

"Season of the Witch" stars Tom Atkins as Dr. Challis and Stacey Nelkin as Ellie, but you might want to commit now to how Old Millennials Remember Movies hosts Tyler and Angela refer to them - It's "Schlubby Burt Reynolds/Tom Selleck" and "Lady," respectively.

Anyway, Schlubby Burt and Lady are investigating the murder of Lady's father, a toy shop owner chased and killed by a rather robotic-looking henchman. He works for a toy manufacturer, Silver Shamrock, who happens to be selling this year's hottest item for kids - three generic Halloween masks! The advertising is relentless, and there's a big giveaway at 9 p.m. on Halloween night for all the kiddies to totally lose their heads over.

"Season of the Witch" isn't scary, but boy howdy is it insane. Tyler and Angela delight themselves talking about all the weirdness, including Tyler's exploration of the film's still-timely themes (mass media is murder!) as well as his fascination with the film's numerous lingering shots of characters doing nothing.

The Old Millennials also chat about the "Halloween" franchise as a whole, including a discussion on this year's latest entry, "Halloween Kills."

Happy Happy Halloween, Hallo-ween, Hallo-ween! Happy Happy Halloween! Silver Shamrock!

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies

Dune (2021)

Titane (2021)

Halloween KIlls (2021)

Squid Game (TV series)

Check out these related past episodes of OMRM:

Sleepy Hollow - 1999 - episode 89

Phantoms - 1998 - episode 56

Teen Witch - 1989 - episode 20

Casper is a friendly ghost with a sad-as-hell backstory. Plus, maybe an uncomfortable obsession with Christina Ricci?

The live-action "Casper" is notable for being the first movie with a CGI lead, and thankfully, the ghost-like effects here were made purposefully cartoonish rather than photo-realistic. That'd be weird and awkward, but don't worry; "Casper" is weird and awkward enough without shoddy special effects.

Bill Pullman plays a ghost therapist still reeling from the death of his wife. In fact, he seems like a bit of a quack, because he's totally dismissive-then-shocked once his daughter Kat (Ricci) first interacts with Casper. We also have three disgusting Uncle ghosts who can (sorta) eat food, and also possess human bodies then make them look like Clint Eastwood and Rodney Dangerfield. Did we mention this movie was weird?

Old Millennials Tyler and Angela try to dissect the various "rules" of haunting and unfinished business in this movie and wonder how much time Casper spends at the Farmer's Market each week. We try to figure out the bizarre ghost-to-human machine, as well as why the movie spends so much time with a villain that has so little to do with the actual plot.

Plus we get "Ghost Pullman," everybody's least-favorite Ghostbuster, a play-by-play analysis of a hilarious "Hard Copy"-esque news segment, an explanation of Jennifer's arc as Brad's boyfriend on "Home Improvement," and the very awkward climactic scene in which a ghost with the voice of a little boy turns into a 13-year-old Devon Sawa. Suddenly that "Can I keep you?" line sounds super creepy.

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies

Muppets Haunted Mansion (2021)

Nightbooks (2021)

Under Wraps (2021)

Casino Royale (2006)

Quantum of Solace (2008)

Skyfall (2012)

Spectre (2015)

No Time to Die (2021)

Check out these related past episodes of OMRM!

Addams Family and Addams Family Values - 1991-1993 - episode 88

Ernest Scared Stupid - 1991 - episode 54

Teen Witch - 1989 - episode 20

He's the ghost with the most... and also a huge pervert.

Tim Burton's "Beetlejuice" is very Tim Burton. It's an impressive production given the modest budget - you've got all the in-demand Burton essentials - a killer Danny Elfman score, whimsical set design, funky makeup and super goths (actually just young Winona Ryder as Lydia Deetz, but she's representing the goth crew well).

For those who haven't seen "Beetlejuice" in a while, it might surprise you to hear just how little the title character played by Michael Keaton actually appears in the movie. This is very much an Alec Baldwin-Geena Davis joint, playing new ghosts who must learn how to haunt away the still living who move into their old house.

Keaton's "Betelgeuse" (that's how it's spelled in the movie... probably a good idea they changed it for the movie title/marketing campaign) is a "bio exorcist," but he's also disgusting and nobody likes him. Whoever beckons him immediately regrets it. Then there's the climax where he tries to marry underage Winona Ryder. Dude's a creep, making it all the more bizarre they made a children's Saturday morning cartoon based on the character.

Old Millennials Remember Movies hosts Tyler and Angela discuss their history with the movie and why Tyler didn't ever feel like watching the movie despite owning the DVD for 15+ years (it's those damn DVD case stickers man!). They also spend some time dissecting the (intentionally?) hilarious deaths of Baldwin and Davis' characters, and why the Maitland's might be the dumbest people in the underworld. And, of course, the Old Millennials take the easy opportunity to fawn over Catherine O'Hara again. She's a treasure.

So brush up on the lyrics for "Day O!" and get ready for that 2-day only sale at The Bon Marche, as Old Millennials Remember Movies discusses "Beetlejuice." But if you say his name three times, you're going to regret all his icky sex talk.

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies

The Many Saints of Newark (2021)

The Guilty (2021)

The Killing of Two Lovers (2021)

Nightmare Alley (1947)

Manifest (TV series)

Check out these Tim Burton-centric past episodes of OMRM:

Sleepy Hollow - 1999 - episode 89

Mars Attacks! - 1996 - episode 17

The Nightmare Before Christmas - 1993 - episode 90

Norm Macdonald was a favorite of the Old Millennials Remember Movies team. Hosts Tyler and Angela react to the shocking death of the legendary comedian by taking a special "Norm journey" through memories and favorite moments from his career. After all, they both watched a whole lot of Norm on The TeeV.

Back in high school, Tyler was even known for having a bit of a "Norm voice." There were many, many hours spent recording "Weekend Update" bits from "Saturday Night Live," and Tyler captured nearly every episode of Norm's ABC sitcom with his trusty VCR, even when it meant abandoning a high school social life in order to make sure it recorded properly.

Tyler and Angela discuss their favorite moments with Norm, including his infamous appearance on "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?," The Moth, his "memoir," the time he came back to host "SNL" after being fired, and all those viciously inappropriate jokes he wrote on those blue note cards throughout his run of "Norm MacDonald Live."

And Tyler and Angela tell the story of meeting Norm in person after a live comedy show about 10 years ago. At one point, Norm patted Angela's head. It was amazing.

The main feature of this episode is Norm's 1998 starring vehicle, "Dirty Work," directed by THAT Bob Saget and featuring a wide variety of  other comedy legends in small roles, including Chevy Chase and Don Rickles. It's also Chris Farley's final film appearance, and, well, his nose needs some attention.

The Old Millennials discuss the still-incredible fish gag, Norm's very specific brand of "acting," what "off-color" jokes from the 1990s that can't be told now,  and whether or not that car trunk can comfortably store a dead hooker.

"These cars are fully-loaded."

"They're loaded with dead hookers!"

Rest in Peace, Norm. Here's your two dollars.

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies

Cry Macho (2021)

Lady in the Water (2006)

Lucifer (The TV series)

Screwed (2000)

The Norm Show/Norm (The TV series)

A Minute with Stan Hooper (The TV series)

The Late Show with David Letterman (The TV series)

Late Night with Conan O'Brien (The TV series)

Great Scott! It's a special time travel episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies, with a special focus on the outrageous Jean-Claude Van Damme extravaganza, "Timecop" from 1994! Give your legs a stretch, because you might need to do the splits a few times during this episode.

First up, Old Millennials Tyler and Angela discuss showing the "Back to the Future" trilogy to their kids. Since the 1985 "Back to the Future" is essentially a perfect movie, there's no real point in talking about it extensively. It's awesome, and you already know it's awesome.

The sequels, however, are an interesting experience in 2021, especially when you're trying to explain to an 8-year-old all the double-Marty-folding-over-the-original-movie  hijinks involved with "Back to the Future Part II." At some point, you just throw your hands up and say, "Look kids! Hoverboard chase!"

Tyler and Angela then take a deep dive into "Timecop," a movie with some of the most convoluted time travel rules in movie history. First, you gotta take a ride in a "Space Mountain"-esque rocket car, then you travel to the past but the car doesn't, then you have a little device that can send you back to the present day (but not the future, because "the future hasn't happened yet"), then the rocket car comes back, then Ron Silver has a scar, JCVD has a mullet and... oh who cares? Van Damme does some high kicks. He shoulda been a Broadway dancer.

So hop in the DeLorean, dodge the manure and enjoy the Old Millennials Remember Movies Time Travel Special! Just make sure to never let the same matter occupy the same space at the same time. It gets very gooey cartoony.

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies

Malignant (2021)

Worth (2021)

Love and Monsters (2020)

The Whole Nine Yards (2000)

Heist (2001)

House on Haunted Hill (1999)

Into the Badlands (TV series)

Check out these related past episodes of OMRM:

Street Fighter - 1994 - episode 34

Scrooged -1988 - episode 24

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban - 2004 - episode 91

On the swashbuckling finale of the Old Millennials Remember Movies SUMMER OF BRUCKHEIMER, co-hosts Tyler and Angela discuss the entirety of Disney's "Pirates of the Caribbean" franchise.

Yes, we know talking about Johnny Depp is a thorny issue these days, but thankfully, the charm, spectacle and weirdness of the "Pirates" franchise extends far beyond a single actor, and it's still fair to say the character of Captain Jack Sparrow qualifies as a definitive early 2000s pop culture phenomenon.

The co-hosts predictably gush about the first film, 2003's still spectacular "The Curse of the Black Pearl," a blockbuster that takes big risks and delivers against long odds. Seriously, who would've thought a movie based on a theme park ride could work? Credit to the off-kilter presence of drunken/insane Captain Jack, steady romantic leads in the form of Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley, a scenery-chewing Geoffrey Rush as cursed baddie Captain Barbossa, lush production design, quality CGI and daring direction by Gore Verbinski.

Tyler and Angela also discuss the sequels and rigorously defend the divisive 2nd and 3rd entries, 2006's "Dead Man's Chest" and 2007's "At World's End." Those Verbinski sequels are almost adversarial in their strange and twisty creative choices, and Tyler in particular loves it when filmmakers deliberately antagonize the masses.

The co-hosts also recall experiencing the revamped "Pirates of the Caribbean" ride at Disney World on its opening day (much ado about almost nothing) as well as seeing "Dead Man's Chest" on their honeymoon.

The Old Millennials also slog through the series weak point, 2011's "On Stranger Tides," then (sorta) defend the much-maligned 2017 entry, "Dead Men Tell No Tales." Zombie sharks!

The key to a successful "Pirates" movie? Let Jack Sparrow be an instrument of chaos and let the other characters deliver key story elements.

So take a listen, me hearties, and try not to be eaten by a Kraken while sinking down to Davy Jones' locker. It's the oversized finale to the summer-long look at the blockbuster films of producer Jerry Bruckheimer on Old Millennials Remember Movies! Yo ho!

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies:

The Green Knight (2021)

Annette (2021)

Cruella (2021)

Reminiscence (2021)

The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard (2021)

Paw Patrol: The Movie (2021)

Vivo (2021)

Hudson Hawk (1991)

An asteroid the size of Texas that literally "roars" as it approaches Earth perfectly represents the over-the-top and punishing nature of Michael Bay's "Armageddon," a movie with about 1,000 action sequences, 10,000 one-liners and roughly 65 million cuts. No single shot lasts more than a second or so. It may not be a great movie, but it's definitely the MOST movie of the 1990s.

"Armageddon" is a fascinating stop for Jerry Bruckheimer, a producer mostly known for R-rated action movies. With a shiny PG-13, and a "Titanic"-feeling romantic subplot between Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler, "Armageddon" lured hordes of teenagers to the multiplex, and they all got a full helping of Bruce Willis machismo and bizarre Steve Buscemi horn-doggery.

Old Millennnials Remember 'Armageddon'

Old Millennials hosts Tyler and Angela have vivid memories of experiencing "Armageddon" in the summer of 1998. There were packed auditoriums of sobbing adults (damn you, Harry Stamper for breaking your promise!), McDonald's mini-posters hung on walls and two different soundtracks purchased (probably) at Sam Goody (the Aerosmith-centric album and the Trevor Rabin score). Years later, even an A.J. Frost action figure might be purchased.

Both hosts loved the movie as teenagers... then at some point, the assaultive pacing and relentless action just stops being fun. This movie blows up everything... entire cities, multiple space shuttles/vehicles, even the damn opening title card gets blasted to smithereens. Nuclear bombs get set off too early, Affleck jumps over the Asteroid Grand Canyon and Steve Buscemi gets space dementia.

And yet, there are moments of "Armageddon" that still demonstrate why the movie became such a massive hit. The cast, which includes welcome faces like Billy Bob Thornton, Michael Clarke Duncan, Owen Wilson, Ruskie Peter Stormare, Cooper from "Hangin' with Mr. Cooper," plus the already mentioned leads (Affleck rules in this movie; fight us!), deliver some solid laughs, and, every now and then, Michael Bay stages some stirring sequences, usually the ones without the explosions.

We've got just five words for you: Go pack a big bag of Animal Crackers because you won't want to miss a thing of this episode of OMRM. That's like 11 words or something.

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies

The Suicide Squad (2021)/Suicide Squad (2016)

Pig (2021)

Zola (2021)

Leaving Las Vegas (1995)

Val (2021)

Woodstock 99: Peace, Love and Rage (2021)

Gunpowder Milkshake (2021)

Barb and Star Go to Vista del Mar (2021)

Make a move and the bunny gets it!

Holding a stuffed animal at gunpoint is just one of the many evil deeds committed by Cyrus the Virus in "Con Air," an R-rated action extravaganza that makes no sense but absolutely rules anyway. Cyrus the Virus is a swaggering supervillain played with gleeful panache by John Malkovich. Oh and did we mention a sweaty, long-haired, Southern drawlin' Nicolas Cage as wrongly-accused convict-turned-reluctant hero Cameron Poe? He's here to save the (expletive deleted) day.

In between the action set pieces (of which there are many), "Con Air" is mostly a movie comprised of characters saying each other's nicknames. Diamond Dog, Pinball, Swamp Thing, Johnny 23, Baby-O... even Steve Buscemi's already-memorable real name, Garland Greene, comes with a nickname, "The Marietta Mangler." He really does have the whole world in his hands.

Old Millennials Remember Movies - Con Air podcast

In this latest installment of the Summer of Jerry Bruckheimer, Old Millennials Tyler and Angela discuss this movie's irritating opening act, the baffling logic of driving a convoy of soldiers through the only enclosed area in a 100-mile stretch of desert, Malkovich's delicious line-reading (including a little ditty about someone losing their bladder), and the Nicolas Cage moments that inspired a million memes.

Tyler and Angela also catch up with a number of big-time new release movies in the first half of the episode.

The Summer of Bruckheimer takes to the skies! Try not to get yourself stuck in the landing gear.

Also discussed in this episode of OMRM:

Jungle Cruise (2021)

Black Widow (2021)

F9: The Fast Saga (2021)

A Quiet Place: Part II (2021)

Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021)

Shiva Baby (2021)

False Positive (2021)

The Fast and the Furious (2001) and 2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)

The Village (2004)

"The Rock" asks the age-old question: Glass or plastic?

Whether you want your VX-gas-riddled corpse stored in a glass jar or a plastic bag, Nicolas Cage's FBI science nerd Stanley Goodspeed will be there to analyze it.

Sean Connery gets top-billing in Michael Bay's ridiculous, violent and super-fun action-adventure, but it's Cage's non-swearing accidental badass who steals "The Rock." Ed Harris is a general-turned-reluctant terrorist who takes a bunch of tourists hostage on Alcatraz, and so the powers-that-be need to recruit the only man to ever escape - Connery's British spy James Bond...errr John Mason to help the good guys break in. Cage's Goodspeed is there to defuse a bunch of rockets comprised of the most fragile array of face-burning, heart-stopping goo you can imagine. Seriously, if those Tide laundry pods break so easily, how could the government have confidence in little green orbs of super poison?

Anyway, "The Rock" is relentless, with three full action scenes BEFORE the good guys ever touch down on Alcatraz. That includes a wild car chase through San Francisco, but rest assured, Connery is only BORROWING YOUR HUMVEE.

Old Millennnials Remember Movies hosts Tyler and Angela discuss their love of the Cage-Connery pairing, some of the real-life history of the island prison, and Tyler's disappointment when he attended the real attraction and didn't find a "Temple of Doom" style-mine car track anywhere on the property.

The hosts marvel at the movies deep bench of supporting players, including John Spencer (RIP), Brenda from "General Hospital," and maybe Steve Bannon? That Humvee guy looks like Steve Bannon.

Tyler and Angela definitely don't cut the chit-chat, A-HOLE in this episode, which is probably comprised of at least 50 percent admiration for Nicolas Cage's gloriously strange line-readings. We talk Zeus' bunghole, the marriage police and whether either host would take pleasure in gutting you, BOY!

The Summer of Jerry Bruckheimer continues with "The Rock," also known as maybe the only good Michael Bay movie.

Also discussed on this episode of OMRM:

No Sudden Move (2021)

Boss Baby: Family Business (2021)

The Ice Road (2021)

America: The Motion Picture (2021)

Good on Paper (2021)

Freaky Friday (2003)

Sweet Tooth (2021 television series)

Check out past 'Summer of Bruckheimer' episodes of Old Millennials Remember Movies:

Top Gun -1986 - episode 106

Beverly Hills Cop - 1984 - episode 105

Bad Boys Trilogy - 1995-2020 - episode 68

Days of Thunder - 1990 - episode 41

Maverick's ego is writing checks his body can't cash in "Top Gun," one of the most testosterone-fueled 80s movies of all-time. Guys with names like Cougar and Iceman and Merlin (Oh hai Tim Robbins) glare at each other and sweat a bunch. And the beach volleyball scene? Hoochie mama! Look at Tom Cruise rocking those jeans... in the sand!

"Top Gun" is very much a Tony Scott movie with its yellow hues and focus on kinetic action. But, after all these years, is it possible that the flying sequences in the film are a little... um, underwhelming compared to the razzle dazzle of more recent action films. Maybe that's why Cruise finally made the sequel, now scheduled to come out (insert date in which the pandemic will actually be over). Hopefully it plays "Danger Zone" 55 times, just like in this movie.

Tyler and Angela examine "Top Gun" from all directions, from the sorta flat romance between Cruise and Kelly McGillis, to the totally hot rivalry/foreplay between Maverick and Iceman (played by everybody's favorite Val - Val Kilmer). There's also the business of Maverick following uninterested women into the ladies room, and, well, yikes.

Also on tap: The telegraphed-but-devastating fate of Goose (No, Dr. Greene!) and the seemingly endless stream of "You can't quit" scenes that come after it. Plus the Old Millennials dive deep into the infamous accident and decide, once and for all, who is truly at fault. It's NOT MAVERICK! But he's still kind of a dick.

The Summer of Jerry Bruckheimer continues on Old Millennials Remember Movies!

Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies:

In the Heights (2021)

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (2021)

Luca (2021)

Raya and the Last Dragon (2021)

Hacks (2021 television series)

Willy's Wonderland (2021)

Check out past Bruckheimer-themed episodes of OMRM:

Days of Thunder -1990 - ep41

Bad Boys Trilogy (1995-2020) episode 68

Beverly Hills Cop - 1984 - ep105