Be careful that in encouraging a grade, you don’t shortchange growth; for a grade ought to be a means to growth, helping students—and their parents—see where they are so they can know where to go. Ideally, grades are the beginning of a conversation about what lies underneath the surface: the “why” beneath the “what”. 

In today’s episode, Heights Headmaster Alvaro de Vicente guides us through a nuanced discussion on how parents can understand, interpret, and respond to their sons’ grades while nurturing strong and lasting bonds. Acknowledging that grades serve as a judgment of the quality of a young man’s work at a given time, Mr. de Vicente sheds light on strategies to decipher the meaning behind the letters and numbers. Is it a problem of time, habits, or effort? Is it a helpful indicator of aptitude?  

Regardless of the cause or cure, Alvaro reminds us that even more important than helping to raise a grade, is strengthening the bond parents have with their son. 

Chapters 

• 2:30 Defining grades

• 3:30 Grades: more than a necessary evil

• 5:00 How parents should approach grades 

• 7:28 Digging into the “why” behind a grade

• 9:35 Elements of a grade: intelligence, time, habits, effort

• 14:45 Optimal Work and grades 

• 16:55 Why boys need to own their grades

• 21:00 Evolving relationship with grades 

• 24:00 Growth over grades

• 26:00 Respecting a school’s professional competence 

• 29:35 What your tone communicates 

• 36:35 Internal motivation 

• 40:00 How to reframe as a parent

Recommended Resources

Punished by Rewards? from The Golden Hour Podcast

Also on the Forum

Handling Poor Grades: Steps to an Academic Reset with Michael Moynihan

Grinders Aren’t Heroes: On Student Motivation by Dave Fornaciari and Michael Hude

Motivation: Encouraging Reluctant Students by Tom Cox