Do you know how to disable an invisible alarm? Yeah, well, listen close; someone on our crew is about to tell you.

Well, maybe... we're not entirely sure it works, so I don't know that I'd test it at the Louvre. Maybe Paddy MacDougal's Museum O'Naughty Limericks and Saucy Sea Shanties first. 

Just steer clear of the green milkshakes. Actually, that's a really good lesson for the Oz 9 as well.

Anyway, here's the episode, it's late, and there are probably half a dozen limericks at Paddy's that could push it down and steal its lunch money, but never mind. Someone bring me some wine, and don't spare the chickens.

You've been listening to:

This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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The crew aboard the Oz 9 are stalactites, holding tight to the ceiling in unexpected zero Gs, and the crew on the ground are stalagmites, who might survive if a crabby, oddly dressed ancient god decides to let them go.

You know, same old same old.

Oz 9 is back from holiday break, though why a crew that typically works a solid seven-minute day needs a break is yet to be determined. 

We hope you missed us as much as we very nearly missed that very important satellite. Hey, who needs news in this day and age, amirite? 

You’ve been listening to:

Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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To punish Kevin Hall for having the gall to ... something, I can't remember what it was he did, but for sure he did something really bad to merit this kind of response.... Anyway, maybe just to be mean, we made him relisten to Oz 9, write a bunch of trivia questions, then ask them to four people who among them could barely scrape up an answer to the question of what they had for breakfast on that particular day. 

It's nearly 90 minutes of "uhhhhhh....." and "hang on, I know I know this one," and "seriously, Kevin, where are you getting these questions?!" and very few answers, but if you like that sort of thing, it's good for an occasional laugh. 

Huge thanks to Kevin for enduring, and for Bryan, Corey, and Jess for being amazing, fantastic (if nearly hopeless) sports. 

Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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Our beloved OG Narrator Richard Nadolny wrote and reads the Oz 9 version of "The Night Before Christmas."

Merry Christmas, ya bums.

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EARLIER SOUND ISSUES HAVE BEEN CORRECTED, AND OUR PRODUCTION PERSON HAS BEEN FWIIIIIIIIIIII......

What happens when the alien aboard your ship gets hungry? 

Usually really gross things involving lots of blood and gore and that, but fortunately for us, the grossest thing in this episode is a small critter popping out of an orifice. Which is actually less gross than it sounds. Wait for it.

The ships of Samantha Lyons and the Oz 9 have stumbled into one another in space, and Leet's had lots of caffeine, and there's some dancing.

This bonus ep includes the writing and acting genius of Beccy Stirrup. Please check out more by this amazing creator: https://www.facebook.com/diaryofaspacearchivist/

Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

Please note that Oz 9 will be taking a brief holiday hiatus and we'll be back in January of 2021. Happy hols to alls!

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Humans on the receiving end of divine affections don't do so well, mythologically speaking. However, after having seen Donna in action, the smart money is on the homo sapien. Pluto better watch his gold lamé onesie, if he knows what's good for him.

With this episode, we are officially halfway through Season 3 of Oz 9, so let's all take a moment to realize this crew of idiots has managed to survive this long. Well, apart from Matt, that guard in the tunnel, Lady Nibble-Biscuit, the mime, several thousand pod-occupants, 1/3 of Sweden.... never mind.

As this gaggle of ninnies is still out there, do please be careful. Wear your mask, wash your hands, and be sure to carry Idiot Repellant.

You've been listening to:

This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Our thanks to Just Short of Crazy blog for the image of Pluto.

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Our gratitude to the very real town of French Lick, Indiana, for not issuing and cease and desist orders or otherwise objecting to us invading their home. If you are a resident of or have been to French Lick, we'd love to hear from you — give us a shout @oz9podcast on Bluesky or Twitter. Or if you have a really good recipe for the sort of cocktail that makes you not care that you're spending your precious leisure time with us.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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I'd apologize for this being so late, but if you think about it, I gave you an extra 16-and-a-half Oz-free hours, which is, like, a decade in idiot years.

It's been a long day aboard the Oz 9. You think bad decision making is easy — Doritos for dinner? Yes, please. Easy! Go for a run or drink chocolate milk with vodka? Vodka. Definitely. Easy! —and yet, it's exhausting. 

So, you'll get no apology from me, unless I come across one on my way to the couch. 

You've been listening to:

This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Also, would you buy a bloody comic book at our Etsy site? Seriously, I need to park my car somewhere.

Take care, space monkeys. Until next time!

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Remember how there was that one week you were sick or maybe just on vacation but too poor to go anywhere? And you watched daytime TV, and even though you knew it was ridiculous and cheesy, by Friday you were desperate to know if little Suzy really was Armoire's daughter and if Aristato would find Nectarina in time to stop her from marrying ... I don't know, Ponderosa Jutjaw or whatever?

Just stay with me, this is relevant.

What I'm saying is, it's totally possible to get swept up in a story, even if the story is kind of nonsense and the characters are slightly less intelligent than waffles. 

Don't believe me? This is episode 48. 

You've been listening to:

This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

We love reviews (glowing ones, preferably), so feel free to leave us one on Podchaser, Apple Podcasts, or the podcatcher of your choice.

Until next time, Space Monkeys!

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What would you do if everything in your garden suddenly attacked you? Carrots shooting themselves at your eyes, radishes nibbling tiny, spicy holes in your ankles, kohlrabi shouting at you, probably in German, given how "kohlrabi" is spelled — does it seem German to you? just me? — and let's not even talk about what the watermelon is trying to do.

Would you ever be able to eat a salad again?

This is vaguely relevant to episode 47, but only sort of. Meanwhile, I'm going to have nightmares about cauliflower.

You've been listening to:

This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Want to support Oz 9?

TeePublic: https://www.teepublic.com/user/oz9

ETSY SHOP: https://oz9podcast.etsy.com

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/Oz9podcast

Until next time, space monkeys!

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Probably the most remarkable thing that happens in this entire episode is that Le Bichon Frise pronounces "assassinate" correctly. I know. We were pretty shocked too.

It happens at the bottom of page 3, so if you just want to hear that and skip the rest, I don't suppose anyone would blame you.

Oh, and there's a bit about a butterfly that's funny. You might want to stick around for that. Up to you.

You've been listening to:

This episode was directed by June Clark Eubanks. Our theme and other music is composed and performed by John Faley. Our artwork is by Lucas Elliott (who also did our COMIC BOOK and our cool pin set!! https://oz9podcast.etsy.com). Oz 9 is written and produced by Shannon Perry. 

Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/.

Until next time, space monkeys!

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