Paging Dr. NerdLove

This week we're doing something different. With the continuing progress of #metoo, #timesup and the questions about consent, there's no better time to talk about building towards a culture of enthusiastic consent. That's why I sit down with activist and writer Kitty Stryker, the editor of "Ask: Building Consent Culture" and talk about Aziz Ansari, what consent culture would look like, how society trains everyone to ignore their own boundaries and how to start examining the other ways we push boundaries - both our own and other people's.

Show Highlights:

• How we get consent wrong
• Why we find enthusiastic consent to be so scary
• Why everyone makes mistakes regarding consent and how to handle them
• How examining non-sexual consent makes it easier to talk about sexual agency
• What it takes to build a society that prioritizes consent

and so much more.

Related Links:

Ask: Building Consent Culture

The Trouble With Aziz Ansari

How Do You Ask For Consent?

F*ck Like A Gentleman pt. 1

Coerced Consent

Don't forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Consider becoming a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.doctornerdlove.com/books

There are many myths that many men have about what women find attractive - or unattractive - in men... myths that are frequently wrong.

In fact, the belief in these myths is often a source of anxiety and stress for guys who don’t measure up to the ideas of “what makes a real man” - like we talked about in previous episodes.

This week,we're going to bust a few dating myths and talk about what women actually find attractive.

In the wake of the recent shootings in Parkside High School, actor and comedian Michael Ian Black commented that “Deeper than the gun problem is this: boys are broken."

This is in no small part because that all men grow up steeped in a culture that teaches us to be men in ways that are frankly, toxic.  We live in a society that harms young men and pushes them towards violence and isolation. It's time to talk about the effects that toxic masculinity has on boys and men, and on society as a whole.

Anxiety attacks can happen at any time when you’re trying to be social, regardless of gender, regardless of whether you’re attracted to someone or not. Social anxiety makes you feel like you're incapable holding even a basic conversation. It makes you freeze up, it keeps you from going out, living your life or connecting with people, even when you desperately want to.

But the Doc has some tips about how he overcomes his own anxiety... and how you can too.

This week, we’re talking about one of the worst days of the year to be alone:

Valentine’s Day.

When you're single, Valentine's Day is a sheer, stark reminder that you're alone... and it feels like you always will be. Every commercial and song on the radio is be designed to rub your face in the fact that everybody’s got someone to love except you.

But not this year. This year, you're going to not just survive, but it's going to be the start of something amazing.

One of the biggest anxieties that can come up in a relationship - especially when in its early days is paradoxically the most simple: 

What do you do when it's time get a gift for your girlfriend or wife? 

This may not seem like it's that big of a deal... right up until it's Valentine's Day or her birthday or your anniversary and now you're scrambling for a last minute present and all the stores are closed.

Don't let that be you. Make sure that you can find the perfect gift, every time.

Everyone gets rejected. But while rejection can be painful, learning how to handle rejection is a vital skill - and one that can change your life. After all, a guy who can take rejection with good grace and still be a friendly, approachable and charming dude is someone who's displaying not just keen emotional intelligence, but also rock-solid confidence. 

Do it right, and you can turn that "no" into a "yes and that "go away" into "so... how about a drink?"

Comedian and actor Aziz Ansari has recently been accused of sexual misconduct. But the issue with Ansari has less to do with "bad dates" or litigating why someone doesn't leave and everything to do with how we talk about sex and consent.

How does someone who's a safe ally to women, someone who's supposed to be the guy who "gets it" still get it wrong when it comes to consent?

This week we’re going to talk about one of the most common questions I get - where do you meet amazing, intelligent and ambitious women… if you hate bars or clubs?

That’s a fair question. Bars and clubs have become synonymous with “where to meet women”, which is a little unfortunate. While bars are definitely social settings where it’s easy to approach many people in one night, most people don’t meet their partners at bars or clubs. Nor do most people meet their significant others on dating apps. 

But what if there was a way to meet amazing, intelligent, ambitious women, with almost no effort? 

This week, we're going to talk about the best place to meet women... without even trying. 

Show Highlights:

• Why bars are great for approaches, but not for dating
• The one question that determines your dating success
• How to make meeting women almost effortless
• Why happy-hour-style events are the wrong choice
• The #1 mistake men make meeting women

...and so much more.

Related Links: 

How To Pick Up Women In Your Social Circle

How The Right Life Makes Meeting Women Easier

Develop Your Lifestyle

Find The Right Women For You

Meet Women, Effortlessly

 

Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube.

Like the podcast? Consider becoming a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove

Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.doctornerdlove.com/books

The more conventionally attractive somebody is, the more social and cultural value we tend to ascribe to them. And our dating them says a lot about us.

After all, someone who’s incredibly hot has value and power. They can, supposedly, pick and choose their partners with relative abandon. So if you want to date an 8, a 9 or a 10, you have to have equal or greater social value.

So to pull a 9 or 10, you have to be something “special”.

But do you really?