Parenthoot with Neha

In Episode 73, Neha sits down with Cheryl-Ann Couto, a freelance editor and writer and mum to two-and-a-half-year-old Noah, for a long, honest conversation about what motherhood does to who you think you are. Cheryl takes us through her road to becoming a mother: years of a quiet “no”, a pandemic, deep therapy, a tech layoff, and a year of stillness with her therapist and her cat before Noah arrived. She talks about walking out of the hospital feeling completely out of her depth, finding her authority as a caregiver only in the last six to eight months, and what she calls “identity scrambling”. We get into parenting without labels, being a sandwich generation couple with aging parents on both sides and a toddler, moving from a buzzy part of Mumbai to a neighbourhood that finally feels like a village, and the slow work of stealing time that belongs only to her. She closes with the idea she repeats to herself daily: it’s all made up, so you get to invent.

Why You Should Listen

• You can’t answer “tell me about yourself” the way you used to, and you feel like the “before” version of someone.
• You are caring for a small child and aging parents at the same time and wondering who can actually help.
• You are the primary caregiver, working out remote or hybrid work, money, and a creative life all at once.
• You want a first-time podcast guest who is funny, unhurried, and unseriously serious.

Notable Quotes from the Guest

• “I would say I’m an unserious serious person.”
• “I realized at that moment how ill-equipped I was to be a neighbor.”
• “I’m realizing I need to be a better villager too which I honestly have not been.”
• “I was permanently and perennially the before version.”
• “it’s all made up and you get to make up what you do as well”

Practical Takeaways for Listeners

1. Catch the label before it sticks. When you hear yourself say “shy” or “mercurial” about your child, let them change by the day.
2. Keep the guardrails of safe and healthy, then listen to your child and run as little interference as you can.
3. Loosen the “exactly right” standard so grandparents, nannies, and friends can actually help. Imperfect help is still help.
4. Build the village by giving first: offer to watch a neighbour’s child, share school-lunch vessels, say yes to the doorway chat. A village changes by pin code.
5. Steal small pockets of time without guilt. Your child and partner may manage better than your worry predicts.
6. Let creative output stay small: one essay every three months, a short video, a good meal.
7. Split crisis roles with your partner. One of you steadies the emergencies, the other steadies the everyday.

Resources and References

• Cheryl-Ann’s Substack, “clearing out my brain drawer”: https://cherylanncouto.substack.com
• Cheryl-Ann on Instagram (her essays-in-reels): @coarsematerial https://www.instagram.com/coarsematerial
• Concept to look up: the “sandwich generation”, adults raising children while caring for aging parents

About the Guest

Cheryl-Ann Couto is a freelance editor and writer based in Mumbai, with a career that began in media and editorial and later moved into corporate work. She lives with her partner Hemant, a creative director, and their son Noah. She writes essays on Substack and makes short, warm Instagram videos that chronicle this season of her life, one small, ordinary moment at a time.

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In this episode, Neha sits down with researcher and writer Manjima Bhattacharjya, partner to screenwriter-director Saurabh for 27 years, and mother to Tara (20) and Arjun (16). The conversation moves through the full arc of their partnership — from a Barsati apartment in Delhi with one stove and no money, through the decision to have children, the accidents and hospital visits, the delight of birthday parties and precocious kids, into the harder terrain of working motherhood, gendered financial dependence, separate finances as a form of freedom, and the ongoing negotiation of who does what and why. Manjima also reflects on writing two books while raising children in stolen hours, and closes with a meditation on nurturing everyone's inner life — including your own, as it changes with every passing year.

Why You Should Listen

This isn't a tidy how-to on co-parenting. It's an honest unpacking of how an "independent lives, closely shared parenting" model actually gets built — through circumstance, personality, money, trust, and a lot of ongoing self-reflection. If you've ever wondered whether sharing parenting is a value or a personality trait, whether separate finances signal distance or freedom, or how to protect a creative life while raising children, this conversation sits right in that tension without offering easy answers.

Notable Quotes

• On parenting styles: "You have to write the script in your own life."
• On domestic life: "Domestic life is its own beast. And it's very enmeshed."
• On writing amid caregiving: "It is a luxury to think that one can go away and write."
• On money and freedom: "Having finances of your own is more symbolic than it is real... that is where you concretely see freedom."
• On sharing responsibilities: "It is hard to force people to do something that they're not very good at."
• Her closing insight: "Nurturing everyone's inner life is very central to a happy household... don't forget you're also a new edition of yourself."

Resources and References

• Mother Mary Comes to Me by Arundhati Roy: referenced by Manjima while reflecting on motherhood and the mother-daughter relationship
• The Poetics of Space by Gaston Bachelard: the book Manjima was reading, which shaped her reflection on parenting as a kind of house that fills, empties, and changes over time
• Mannequin: Manjima's book, substantially written during a two-week writing residency in Chamonix, France, and in the years around her PhD fieldwork
• Jagori: the feminist organization in Delhi where Manjima began her career

About the Guest

Manjima Bhattacharjya is a researcher, sociologist, and writer whose work sits at the intersection of ideas, storytelling, and social inquiry. She has spent decades in the philanthropy and development sector, alongside a long-running practice of academic writing and fieldwork. She lives in Bombay with her partner Saurabh, a screenwriter and director, and their two children, Tara and Arjun.

• Follow her on Instagram
• Connect with her on LinkedIn

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In this episode, Neha sits down with children's author Vaishali Shroff for a warm, honest conversation about what it really means to write — and why so much of that applies to how we raise kids too. Vaishali talks about stories that took over a decade to find their published form, the self-doubt that never fully goes away even after multiple books, and a moment at a book signing that changed how she thinks about her own work. It's a conversation about patience, trusting your own voice, and letting things unfold in their own time.

Why You Should Listen

If you've ever pushed your child (or yourself) toward an outcome instead of letting the process breathe, this episode offers a gentle reframe. Vaishali's insights on writing "for yourself first" mirror so much of parenting — the comparison trap, the self-doubt, the fear of how others will judge what you put out into the world. Parents raising young readers and writers will especially value her perspective on nurturing creativity without rushing it toward a finish line.

Notable Quotes from the Guest

• On writing to be published vs. writing for yourself: "You've got to discover yourself, you've got to discover the kind of stories you can write... that cannot happen if you just write to be published, because then you're writing for others, you're not writing for yourself."
• On timing: One of her stories, Remembering Amma, was written as an experiment over 14 years before it was published as a children's book.
• On self-doubt: "I still go through that every single day... that feeling of self-doubt. I'm so scared every time a book comes out."
• On being "chosen" to write: A stranger at a book signing told her, "I think God has chosen you to write these two books," a moment Vaishali still carries with her.

Practical Takeaways for Listeners

1. Let stories (and skills) develop on their own timeline. Vaishali's published work includes stories written over a decade earlier — there's no fixed schedule for creative growth.
2. Doubt doesn't disappear with experience — you learn to write alongside it. Reassuring for parents modelling resilience for their kids.
3. There's no single "right" process. Vaishali contrasts her own instinctive, unplotted writing style with a friend's structured plotting approach — both work.
4. Rejection is often about fit, not worth. Many of her stories were rejected multiple times before being accepted elsewhere.
5. Writing for yourself first is not selfish — it's essential. The same applies to encouraging kids to create without an audience in mind.

Resources and References

• Vaishali Shroff's website: vaishalishroff.in
• Instagram: @vaishaliwrites
• Reference to author Elif Shafak and her novel There Are Rivers in the Sky, discussed as an example of letting a story lead the writing process.

About the Guest

Vaishali Shroff is a children's book author with a growing body of published work, including picture books and short stories for young readers. Before writing for children, she published more than 15 short stories for adult readers. Her books include Remembering Amma, along with several forthcoming titles — one of which she wrote more than 11 years before its release. Her writing journey reflects both a deep instinct for storytelling and an honest relationship with the uncertainty that comes with putting creative work into the world.

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In this Parenthoot Spotlight, Neha sits down with Shobha Viswanath, co-founder of Karadi Tales — one of India's most beloved children's publishing houses, now 30 years old. Shobha traces the journey from a gap she spotted as a returning mother (no Indian audiobooks for children) to an institution that has shaped millions of childhoods. The conversation spans the founding of Karadi Tales with husband Viswanath and brother-in-law Narayan, getting Naseeruddin Shah to narrate the very first two stories, the pivot from audiobooks to picture books, and the birth of Karadi Path — a pan-India English language learning program now in thousands of schools. Plus: why Shobha wrote Indian nursery rhymes to replace Jack and Jill, and the accidental discovery that Karadi Tales is an anagram of "read as I talk."

Why You Should Listen

• Whether you grew up with Karadi Tales or are raising a child on them, this is the story behind the stories
• Shobha shares sharp, unsentimental wisdom on raising readers and building a child's aesthetic — without pressure or prescription
• There's an honest conversation about the economics of independent children's publishing and the real threat of AI-generated content
• You'll hear how a family of musicians — alongside Naseeruddin Shah, Gulzar, Girish Karnad, Usha Uthup, and Rahul Dravid — built a 30-year institution from a fax machine and two Panchatantra retellings

Notable Quotes

• "Roz roz you won't feed your child dal chawal, no? You expose them to so many kinds of cuisines, similar with books, similar with art."
• "Always test your story with a teenage kid or an older kid or with an enemy, not even with a friend."
• "What are we doing in an agricultural country like ours, singing rain, rain, go away?"

Resources & References

• Karadi Tales: www.karaditales.com
• Karadipath (English language learning program, pan-India): www.karadipath.com
• The Blue Jackal and The Foolish Lion: Karadi Tales' very first audiobooks, narrated by Naseeruddin Shah
• Run Ravi Run: one of Karadi's recent picture books
• Karadi Rhymes on YouTube: search "Karadi Tales rhymes" or "Karadi Tales mango song" to find Shobha's India-contextual nursery rhymes sung by Usha Uthup
• Shobha's online picture book writing workshop (limited to 20 participants): follow Karadi Tales on Instagram for upcoming dates

About the Guest

Shobha Viswanath is the co-founder of Karadi Tales, established in Chennai in 1996 alongside her husband Viswanath and brother-in-law Narayan — all classically trained Carnatic musicians. A journalist and writer by background, Shobha has spent three decades commissioning, writing, and publishing children's audiobooks and picture books rooted in Indian stories, languages, art, and music traditions. She is also the co-founder of Karadi Path, a structured English language learning methodology now active in government, tribal, and CSR-supported schools across India. She believes children should be trusted with stories — and left free to find their own way into them

• Follow Shobha on Instagram
• Connect with Shobha on LinkedIn

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Aparna Sinha — bestselling author, founder and CEO of Fabulinus, and mother to 10-year-old Zayan — joins Neha for one of the most honest conversations Parenthoot has had. Zayan is on the borderline of the autism spectrum, and Aparna doesn't soften what that means: the early confusion, the wrong therapists, the months of no sleep, the isolation, and the darkest thoughts she says every neurodivergent parent knows but nobody names. She talks about why she and husband Vishal made the painful decision to live apart solely to protect Zayan's routine, what it means to be entirely your own village, and the small victories — a complete sentence spoken to a stranger, a Hindi word understood out of context — that feel seismic when you've spent years working toward them. A conversation about love that doesn't flinch.

Why You Should Listen

If you are parenting a neurodivergent child, you will feel seen in ways that are rare. If you are not, you will come away with a deeper, kinder understanding of what these families carry — often entirely alone. Aparna challenges the "it takes a village" narrative, dismantles therapy myths that cause real harm, and offers hard-won wisdom on trusting your child before you trust any expert.

Notable Quotes

• "I am the village. There is no village. Don't let anybody fool you."
• "When it is good, it is great. When it is bad, it is awful."
• "Without saying a single word, he has changed me into a better person."
• "Trust your child. Whatever your child is telling you is correct."
• "We were broken, but we were not hopeless. We are never hopeless."

Practical Takeaways

• The autism spectrum is not linear — it is a complex spiral. A borderline diagnosis is often invisible to the outside world, and that invisibility is its own burden.
• "Can't" and "won't" are not the same. Learning to read that difference is one of the most critical skills a neurodivergent parent can develop — and one of the hardest to explain to everyone else.
• Not every therapy is right for every child. Ask hard questions before you begin. If your child is consistently distressed, pull them out. Good therapy does not look like a child in tears.
• Routine is not rigidity — it is the foundation on which neurodivergent children build safety and progress.
• Your own mental and physical wellbeing is not a luxury. Acceptance, journaling, walking, and allowing yourself to feel overwhelmed are all part of sustaining the long game.
• Educate yourself beyond WhatsApp forwards. Read books, read journals, understand your child's brain before handing them to any expert.

About the Guest

Aparna Sinha is a bestselling author and the founder and CEO of Fabulinus. She lives in Gurgaon with her 10-year-old son Zayan, who is on the borderline of the autism spectrum. From a family of extraordinary achievers — her mother equalled Sarojini Naidu's record as youngest graduate and postgraduate; her father was a National Award-winning academic and Dean of the Faculty of Law, University of Allahabad — Aparna has channelled her personal journey into advocacy, writing, and building spaces where neurodivergent families feel less alone.

Connect with her on LinkedIn

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Richa became a mother in one of the hardest possible circumstances: peak COVID, while grieving her own mother who had passed away just weeks after she conceived. With no female figure to guide her, no nurse, and a husband who couldn't cook, she built her parenting instincts from a place most people would never expect — a decade of rescuing and rehabilitating senior dogs. Founder of Bowsome Senior Dogs India Foundation and a veterinary hospital in Ahmedabad, Richa joins Neha for a conversation that is honest, funny, and genuinely unexpected. They talk about a difficult pregnancy marked by gestational diabetes and obstetric cholestasis; a postpartum month where she cooked her own meals on Day 5 post-caesarean and cried in the kitchen; the Instagram village that raised her when no one else could; raising a five-year-old boy without gender policing; a bedtime ritual that quietly builds emotional intelligence; and the three things she'd tell every first-time parent.

Why You Should Listen

If you didn't fall in love with your baby the moment they arrived, this episode is for you. If you've parented without a mother, without a rulebook, or without a village that looked like anyone else's — this is for you. If you're raising a boy and thinking seriously about who he becomes, Richa's approach to emotion, identity, and gender norms is specific and grounding. And if you believe a village matters more than any parenting book, you'll love how Richa built hers — from childless friends who trained themselves on bottle prep and drove over at 9:30pm, and strangers on the internet who answered questions at midnight.

Notable Quotes

• "It's a very slow process of falling in love. With your own, somebody you made, you nurtured everything yourself."
• "My anger has gone to five percent. The only thing that makes me angry now is him not eating properly." "I want him to remember me the way I remember my mother."
• "Making tough choices is also an art. You learn it with time."

Resources & References

• Bowsome Senior Dogs India Foundation: Richa's rescue and rehabilitation work with senior dogs. Find them on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bowsomeseniordogsindia
• Waldorf Education: the school philosophy Ivaan attends, emphasizing play-based, developmentally attuned learning.
• Postpartum Support International: for mothers navigating postpartum depression and the fourth trimester: postpartum.net
• Babywearing International: community and resources for new parents: babywearinginternational.org
• ASHA (American Speech-Language-Hearing Association): for parents concerned about late speech development in toddlers: asha.org

About the Guest

Richa Singh is the founder of Bowsome Senior Dogs India Foundation, an organization dedicated to the rescue, rehabilitation, and adoption of senior dogs who are most often overlooked. She also runs a veterinary hospital in Ahmedabad. A graduate of CEPT University, Richa lives in Mumbai with her husband, architect Piyas Choudhuri, their five-year-old son Ivaan, and many, many dogs. Find her work on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/richasinghchoudhuri/

Themes & Tags

Postpartum depression | Parenting without a village | Grief during pregnancy | Parenting without a mother | Raising boys | Feminist parenting | Gender norms at home | Active fatherhood | Boy moms | Parenting in India | Working mothers | Values-based parenting | Intentional parenting | Bedtime rituals | Emotional intelligence in children | Late speech in toddlers | Toddler development | Waldorf education | Alternative schooling | COVID pregnancy | Building community | Food and memory | Dog rescue and motherhood | Senior dog adoption | Mental load

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Sumit Singla is a self-employed HR leader in Gurgaon who works primarily from home while his partner Kirti manages a full-time corporate career. Together, they are raising Samiah, their almost eight-year-old, in a household where gender roles are consciously – and organically – questioned every single day. In this conversation, Sumit talks about why he walked away from a high-travel consulting career in 2019, what equal parenting actually looks like on an ordinary day, how he and Kirti divide emotional and practical responsibilities, the guilt Kirti still carries as a working mother, what society gets wrong about fathers, and what he would tell his pre-parent self about showing up for a partner post-delivery.

Why You Should Listen

If you have ever wondered whether the traditional parenting script is the only one available, this episode is for you. Sumit is thoughtful, funny, and consistently self-aware. He refuses the "hero" label, challenges the framing of "brave fathers," and says several things in this conversation that will stay with you long after it ends. This one is for parents, partners, and anyone thinking about what equal really means at home.

Notable Quotes

• "If your reaction stays the same when gender roles are reversed, then the reaction is fair. Otherwise, you need to think about it."
• "We're not heroes. We're just maybe restoring the balance of the universe a little bit."
• "Active involvement, step one, is being available to listen."
• "It's perfectly fine for a father to express emotion – and especially to tell their child that they love them."
• "Parenthood is not only about caring for the new life. It's also about being supportive and telling your partner that you're on the same side as them."

Practical Takeaways

• Equal parenting lives in the small, daily things: the morning routine, dentist runs, school WhatsApp corrections.
• Non-judgmental listening is the foundation of a child's trust – and it has to start early.
• For new and expectant dads: a C-section is major surgery. Your partner needs your full presence in recovery, not just your excitement about the baby.
• You don't need to teach values. Live them. Kids watch far more than they listen.
• Parenting disagreements don't always need resolution. Two valid opinions can coexist.
• Reducing your partner's mental load isn't help – it's just parenting.

Resources & References

• 📚 Stories of South Asian Supergirls: Samiah's favourite book, featuring Amrita Shergill, Kalpana Chawla, and more. Wonderful for young readers. Available on Amazon India and at most bookstores.
• 🎨 Amrita Shergill: pioneering modernist painter: wikipedia.org/wiki/Amrita_Sher-Gil
• 🚀 Kalpana Chawla: first woman of Indian origin in space: nasa.gov
• 💛 Postpartum Support International: postpartum.net
• 🧠 iCall: free mental health support in India: icallhelpline.org
• 👉 Follow Sumit on Instagram

• 🔗 Connect with Sumit on LinkedIn

Themes & Tags

Equal parenting | Active fatherhood | Gender roles at home | Work-from-home dads | Parenting in India | Postpartum recovery | Values-based parenting | Raising girls | Working mothers | Mental load

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Jo Chopra-McGowan – activist and co-founder of the Latika Roy Foundation in Dehradun – sits down with Neha for a conversation that is equal parts memoir, manifesto, and revolution. Born into a large activist Catholic family in Massachusetts, Jo came to India in her early twenties, married Ravi Chopra, and adopted a premature baby girl – Moy Moy. When Moy Moy was rejected by a mainstream school, Jo didn't petition or protest – she built a school. What began as a morning program for one child slowly became one of India's most respected disability-inclusive organizations, now housed in a landmark building designed entirely around dignity, access, and joy. This episode traces that entire arc – from Jo's impulsive, justice-fuelled youth, through the joy, grief and grace of parenting Moy Moy, to the philosophy of inclusion that now shapes every hallway, ramp, and quiet room at Latika.

Why You Should Listen

If you have ever felt like the systems around your child simply weren't built for them — this episode is for you. Jo speaks with rare honesty about fear, loss, imposter syndrome, and the particular loneliness of giving your life to something larger than yourself. She also makes inclusion feel not like a policy but like a way of being human.

Notable Quotes

• "When I look back at the pictures of the baby I thought was absolutely beautiful, I see this beaky little scrawny chicken. But I was just gone. I was so in love with her."
• "There's this primitive fear that nobody can be for Moy Moy what we are – and yet I realize how silly that was, because I was not her birth mother either."

• "You have to have fear, you have to be worried – that anxiety pushes you forward, makes you learn new things. You don't learn the lesson from somebody telling you."

Practical Takeaways

• Community is infrastructure. Jo built a "Moy Moy's Circle" of people who loved and committed to her daughter. That circle became the foundation – literally – of Latika. Who is in your child's circle?
• Behaviour is communication. Jo reminds us that when we understand what a child is experiencing – sensory, emotional, environmental – we can change almost everything. This applies to every child, not just disabled ones.
• Inclusion benefits everyone. Text messaging, subtitles, OXO kitchen tools, countdown traffic lights – all invented for disabled people, now used by everyone. Designing for the margin improves life at the centre.
• Impulsivity + systems = alchemy. Jo's self-described recklessness, paired with a grounded team, built something 32 years strong. Know which one you are – and find your counterpart.
• The cost is real. Jo names what this life took: proximity to her children and grandchildren, financial security, a sense of belonging anywhere. Naming the cost doesn't diminish the choice. It honours it.

Resources & References

• Latika Roy Foundation: https://latikaroy.org
• Moy Moy's Circle: https://www.amazon.in/Moy-Moys-Circle-Disability-Together/dp/9357315195?s=bazaar
• Voluntary Service Overseas (VSO): vsointernational.org - the UK organisation that sent Paula, Latika's foundational volunteer
• OXO Good Grips: oxo.com - the universal-design kitchen brand Jo references

About the Guest

Jo Chopra-McGowan is an American-born activist, writer, and disability rights advocate based in Dehradun, India. She is the co-founder of the Latika Roy Foundation, which for over 32 years has worked to create inclusive, dignified spaces for children and adults with disabilities. Jo is a TEDx speaker and a fierce, funny voice for a world built to work for everyone.

Connect with Jo on LinkedIn

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In this episode, Neha sits down with Maya Varma – entrepreneur, co-founder and Chief Brand & Product Officer of fashion labels Joker & Witch and Teejh – for a conversation that is equal parts raw and revelatory. Maya and her husband Satish built two thriving brands together, raised a few dogs, and then in 2020, in the middle of a pandemic, had their son Vivaan. What followed was a reckoning – with identity, with partnership, with anger she didn't recognise as her own, and with a version of motherhood nobody had prepared her for. This episode traces that entire arc: the early euphoria of building together, the slow erosion of boundaries between work and marriage, the postpartum haze, the resentment, the therapy, and the ongoing, imperfect journey back to herself.

Why You Should Listen

If you are a mother who has ever felt like the invisible load is entirely yours – the night feeds, the googling, the logistics, the emotional labour – this episode will feel like someone finally said it out loud. Maya doesn't perform healing. She talks about the cycles of fight and cold war, the anger that landed on her child and scared her, the solo trip to Delhi where she slept eight hours straight and called it a luxury. She talks about what it actually takes to work on a marriage after a decade, what individual therapy did that couples therapy couldn't, and why asking for help is not defeat – it's the only way through. If you are building something while raising someone, this one's for you.

Practical Takeaways

• Start a memory draft. Maya has kept a running draft email since Vivaan was five months old – milestones, first words, funny moments, things she'll miss. A low-effort, high-return ritual any parent can begin today.
• Solo travel, even briefly, counts. A two-day work trip to Delhi where Maya slept uninterrupted became her first real reset. You don't need a retreat – you need a night that belongs only to you.
• Individual therapy before couples therapy. Maya found that working inward first – understanding her own triggers, expectations, and patterns – made everything else more possible.
• Bring your child into your workspace if you can. Maya set up a nursery corner in their office, breastfed during breaks, and let Vivaan grow up around the team and dogs. It's not for everyone, but it dissolved the guilt of the binary choice.

Resources & References

• Joker & Witch: Maya's fashion jewellery label, known for bold, story-led design. jokerandwitch.com
• Teejh: Maya's second label, focused on contemporary Indian jewellery. teejh.com
• On postpartum depression and mood changes: Many mothers go undiagnosed for years. If Maya's experience resonates, the iCall helpline (India) offers accessible mental health support: icallhelpline.org
• On entrepreneurial loneliness: Paul Graham's essay "How to Do What You Love" and the broader canon around founder mental health speak to the isolation Maya describes.

About the Guest

Maya Varma is the co-founder and Chief Brand & Product Officer of Joker & Witch and Teejh, two of India's most distinctive fashion jewellery labels. She built both brands alongside her husband and business partner Satish, whom she met in 2013 and married in 2015. A self-described creative, passionate, and deeply grounded person, Maya draws on her Kerala roots, her love of nature, and a finely tuned instinct for design and people. She is also a mother to five-year-old Vivaan and to three dogs – and is, by her own admission, still figuring it all out.

Follow Maya on Instagram

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Vivitsa Kohli is a potter, business owner, and mother to Maitreya, born in 2023. She describes herself as ambitious, calculative, disciplined — and not particularly fond of unplanned things. Which makes an unplanned pregnancy quite the plot twist.

In this episode, Vivitsa speaks with rare, unmasked honesty about first trimester depression, the deep physical and emotional inequity of pregnancy, the anger she felt at having to sacrifice more than her partner ever could, and the long wait before she actually began to enjoy her child. She also talks about protecting her ambition with zero apology, navigating an equal marriage that comes with its own flavour of conflict, and the slow, quiet process of retrieving herself as her son Maitreya grew into a talking, laughing, chaos-causing toddler.

Why You Should Listen

If you have ever felt angry during pregnancy and didn't know where to put it — this episode is for you. If you've waited longer than felt acceptable to enjoy your baby — this episode is for you. If you're an ambitious woman trying to hold your work, your identity, and your child all at once — Vivitsa sees you, names it, and refuses to apologise for any of it.

Notable Quotes

• "There was a very deep sense of this is unfair. This is unequal. There is never going to be anything that this person can do that would balance it."
• "That unfairness of that pregnancy made me shamelessly ask for help."
• "Vivitsa Kohli as a human being is not really here anymore. It's Vivitsa Kohli the mom who tries to do other things also."
• "Moms just give up, bro. They give up their selves and lives. They just have to."

Practical Takeaways

• Asking for help is not weakness. For Vivitsa, the inequity of pregnancy became the very thing that broke open her resistance to asking. Shamelessly and specifically.
• Adapting ambition is not abandoning it. She didn't give up her work — she recalibrated expectations, leaned on her support network, and protected even 40% of her vision. The vision stayed alive.
• Not enjoying your newborn is more common than anyone admits. Vivitsa was candid that enjoyment came almost two years in, when Maitreya began to talk. There is no universal timeline for falling in love with early motherhood.
• Equal partnerships require more negotiation, not less. Shared control means shared conflict. Learning to ask for what you need without leading with complaint is its own skill — one she's still building.
• Morning time is a lifeline. Four to five hours of kindergarten in the morning changed everything for Vivitsa — yoga, work, creative time, and the ability to show up as a mother for the rest of the day.

About Vivitsa Kohli

Vivitsa Kohli is a potter and business owner currently based in Israel with her partner Constantine and their son Maitreya. Her work as a maker is instinct-led and tactile — she creates because she cannot not create. She is currently working on expanding her studio practice and her India-based business operations.

Follow Vivitsa on Instagram

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