Today's episode is part 1 of a 3-part series where we will be looking into some common teen behaviors that you might be witnessing in your child and dive a little into you why it happens, what about it creates challenges for us, and what we can do in response.

The behavior we are focusing on today is isolating.  What are some things you can do if you are concerned about isolation?

This episode’s takeaways:

• Teens' brains and bodies are trying to figure out this influx of hormones, and it will take some time to work it out. 
•  It's developmentally normal for teens to retreat from their parents and engage less.  It's a practice of self-governance.
• Examine your own behaviors and emotions that are triggered by your teen's actions.  What can you learn about what you're feeling?
• Try asking fewer questions and making more observations when your child is less than chatty.
• Use technology as a way to stay connected.
• Create opportunities for fun and laughter together. 
• Watch for warning signs of unhealthy isolation and consult a professional when you see them. 

Books quoted:

The Teenage Brain

Articles studied:

Motivation and What Really Drives Human Behavior

Understanding the Effects of Social Isolation on Mental Health

Other Resources:

Feelings Wheel

Nate Bargatze Comedy Clip

John Crist Comedy Clip

Jim Gaffigan Comedy Clip (one explicit word in this clip)

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About Through The Hard:
"Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

Explore Additional Support:

• Delve into our website: Pathways to Hope Network (Subscribe for weekly encouragement)
• Access local and national resources: Pathways Resources
• Read insightful articles on our blog: Pathways Blog
• Find answers to common queries: Pathways FAQ

Connect with Us:

• Join our community on Facebook: Pathways to Hope Network Facebook
• Stay connected on Instagram: Pathways to Hope Network Instagram
• For personalized support, reach out via email: [email protected]

Did you know studies show that over-involved parenting is associated with anxiety, depression, life dissatisfaction, and emotional dysregulation? In today’s episode, we talk about what everyone guilty of over-involved parenting wants to know.  If we’re not meant to fix the problem or behavior, what are we supposed to do? 

This episode's takeaways:

• Influence. The biggest shift happens when we switch from a manager role to an advisor.  Instead of giving directions, ask questions and provide emotional support. 
• Relationship. Focus on being present in your child’s discomfort they may be experiencing without taking it away. Your child is like a kite in the wind; you are the person on the ground holding the string.  
• Truth without a relationship leads to rejection.  Rules without relationships lead to rebellion.  Discipline without a relationship leads to anger and resentment. Focus on the relationship, not the behavior. 
• Stay consistent with discipline.  
  • Immediate consequences, short-term, remain loving when giving discipline.
  • Non-emotional parenting.
  • Show up mature, loving, and consistent. Modeling what the behavior looks like. 

___________________________________________________________________________

About Through The Hard:
"Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

Explore Additional Support:

• Delve into our website: Pathways to Hope Network (Subscribe for weekly encouragement)
• Access local and national resources: Pathways Resources
• Read insightful articles on our blog: Pathways Blog
• Find answers to common queries: Pathways FAQ

Connect with Us:

• Join our community on Facebook: Pathways to Hope Network Facebook
• Stay connected on Instagram: Pathways to Hope Network Instagram
• For personalized support, reach out via email: [email protected]

Show-notes Episode 27

Strengthening Your Relationship with Your Child

If life as a parent is less than perfect right now, if you feel like you are on a hamster wheel, living the same life over and over again, it may be an indication that it's time to make some shifts in your parenting. 

In today’s episode, we will talk about three practical ways you can begin to change your parenting style to better support your relationship with your teen. 

Learn about:

1) Switching from a model of Punishment to a model of Discipline

2) Switch from Lectures to Discussions

3) Switch from a parenting model of Telling to a parenting model of Sharing

Your to-do list:

Make a list of 5 things to do to make you feel good and put them in your calendar.  Take a hot bath, have coffee with a friend, watch a reality show, exercise, or take a walk.  Find a way to pour back into yourself. 

Remember to take things one day at a time. 

Resources: 

Book quoted:

• Raising Teens in a Contrary Culture by Mark Gregston

Article quoted:

• Sharing vs. Telling by Vince Gowmon

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Private Facebook Community:https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeformothers

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]

The Greatest Risk You Are Facing

In today’s episode, we talk about the greatest risk you are facing this season (it’s not what you may think). We also discuss replacing reaction with rest, identifying the emotions that may indicate you could be in reaction mode, and the four steps you should take when you find yourself there.

Notes from the show:

Parents on this journey get stuck in a cycle of reacting.

The greatest risk you are up against right now is that what’s going on with your child will break you.

You are your child's most important asset, and if you are so focused on fixing them that you end up broken, things will start falling apart.

Separate yourself emotionally, mentally, and physically, if needed, from the source of tension. Use a prepared phrase like: “I love you, and I need space for a little bit. You are important to me, and I don’t want to screw this up.” Disengage with love.

Be a detective! The story I’m telling myself is… Look for other possible interpretations. If those were true, would it change your response?

Recognize when you are in reaction mode. Say or do as little as possible until peace is restored. Wait until calm before you reengage.

Resources: 

Books quoted

• Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie
• Unfettered by Mandy Smith

Music discussed (Of course, these are just my choices. Play what works best for you) 

• Lauren Daigle
• Country Music

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Private Facebook Community:https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeformothers

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]

Getting Through the Holidays

The holiday season can be challenging. In today's episode, we talk about some of the challenges you may face and a few new unexpected opportunities present this time of year. 

Resources: 

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

  ____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Private Facebook Community:https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeformothers

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]

Show-notes Episode 23

Finding Your Own Path

From the moment we become parents, we condition ourselves to recognize potential dangers. For this reason, as parents with children in the juvenile justice system, it's very challenging to know how much to get involved and how much to restrain. With all our focus on them and their path, we forget that we have our own journey on this path toward healing. In this episode, we talk about that journey and how closely it's tied to discovering what our path and purpose are during this season of our child's life.

Resources: 

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Private Facebook Community:https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeformothers

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]

Raw, Real & Unedited

Warning: Emotional Episode. 

Today, I was feeling all the feels. Having a podcast or running a social media page doesn’t make you an expert on anything. Don’t let anyone tell you anyone different. Being in this role brings so many blessings, and I’m so grateful to walk beside each of you during this season of life, but it also has its challenges. Today’s message was taken in a moment of vulnerability on my iPhone when more than anything, I just felt the need to connect to you and let you know that you are not alone in this. There’s no intro, no outro, and more “ummm” than there should be, but it’s 100% real. I pray that it still finds its way to speak to what you need today.

Resources: 

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]

Show-notes Episode 21

Building Teen Competence and Confidence with Loving Detachment

One of the reasons we get so exhausted as parents is that we can become a little over-involved in our child's decisions. In this episode, we explore the practice of loving detachment and learn about the surprising impact it can have on building competency and confidence in your teen.

Listen as we review the two questions you should ask yourself before putting your child "in the backpack," and explore together feelings that may come up for you when practicing this form of letting go.

Finally, we'll discuss the idea of loving detachment by taking a look at Dr. Wayland Meyers's Blog post, How Detachment Can Be Loving For All. It’s definitely a must-read. Click the blog title to check it out! You can also find a link for it on our Resource Page listed below.

Resources: 

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Private Facebook Community:https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeformothers

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]

Unyielding  Episode 20

The #1 Reason You Feel Exhausted

Raising teenagers can be EXHAUSTING; in this episode, we discuss the #1 reason for it. 

Join the conversation as I talk about the “Backpack Principle.” 

This new way principle brings awareness and clarity to what it looks like to begin the process of loving detachment. I’ve been practicing it for a couple of weeks now, and it has been a GAME CHANGER in our family.

We’ll also discuss why detaching is so uncomfortable.

• Two questions to ask yourself before you jump in to instruct, solve or protect your teen.
• Switching roles from Director to Advisor
• And more..

Episode Take Aways....
Grow in your awareness of backpack moments this week. When confronted with them, ask yourself...
1.  Have they been given what I believe is wisdom on this matter, or in other words, have we covered this before?
2.  Am I willing to allow this to be theirs?

Resources: 

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Private Facebook Community:https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeformothers

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]

When Does the Healing Begin?

Parents who have been stretched thin are questioning their ability to continue holding and often ask when does the healing begin?

In this episode, we explore what healing really looks like on this journey with our child.

We also discuss some of our obstacles in getting to a place of healing, how our hope is found in the whispers, whether our patterns in parenting are still serving us in the best possible way, and more.

Special announcement regarding the next session of our online support group. 
You can register and get more information by emailing “I’m in!” to [email protected]

Resources: 

Pathways website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ (Remember to Subscribe!)

• Local and national resources: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/resources/ 
• Blog: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/blog-2/ 
• FAQ: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/f-a-q/ 

  
  

____________________________________________________________________________

Unyielding is brought to you by Pathways to Hope Network. A non-profit organization that provides cost-free support and community to parents with youth facing criminal allegations.

Learn more about Pathways on our website: https://pathwaystohopenetwork.org/ 

Discover the community and connect by following us on Facebook and Instagram. 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pathwaystohopenetwork 

Private Facebook Community:https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeformothers

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pathways_to_hope_network/

For support, email: [email protected]