I find that parents today often fit my favorite analogy.  They’re preparing their kids to live in a zoo, rather than survive in the jungle!

Someone once heard my “jungle versus zoo” analogy and assumed I was suggesting we throw our kids to the lions!  They thought that preparing them to survive in the jungle meant that we expose them to the evil side of life.

That’s not what I’m talking about.

What I encourage parents to do is be aware!  Show your kids what to watch out for in the world, what can do them harm… and how to set up strong barriers so that the dangers don’t overcome them.

It’s a jungle out there!  You and your teens need to be prepared!

 

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Nobody goes through life without struggling.  It’s just not possible!  So why do some parents freak out when their teen goes through hard times?

Struggling teens often present a crisis to their parents.  Mom and dad might back away from their child in those moments… because they feel like failures.  Or they jump in and protect their teen from any hardship… longing to give them an easy and good life.

My challenge to moms and dads with struggling teens is this:  As your kids apply the principles you’ve taught them, they’ll always run into trouble in the world.  But that doesn’t mean you’ve done your job poorly!  In fact… it’s your chance to step up and love your teen at the time they need you most.

Struggle is normal.  It’s healthy.  And you need to expect it in your teen!

 

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If anger were an art form, I think teens would be the Michelangelo’s of the world!

You know what I’m talking about. The verbal tirades of a 17- year- old… the empty cussing of your child’s friends… even the icy silence of a troubled teen. I might be describing some of the colorful behavior in your own home!

After seeing some of the angriest teens come through the doors at our residential counseling center in Texas, I’ve learned that many kids are upset because they’re encountering things in life they weren’t prepared for. The disappointment and confusion blindside them… and their response is pure anger.

Next time anger flares up in your home, be sure to keep your cool. Then …take a look behind their outrage …and try to find out what’s really going on.

 

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I meet a lot of parents who are concerned about the world’s influence on their kids. And they want to raise kids that’ll one day be healthy members of society. That’s exactly what I want, too!

These desires for protection and preparation are good. They’re God- given tendencies for parents. But I find that many well-meaning moms and dads think they’re preparing their child for life in the world… by simply protecting them. In fact… they’re over- protecting.

When that happens, kids end up either lost in a world they’ve never experienced before… or fighting their parents for independence.

You don’t want either one for your child.

So the question is this: Are you preparing your teen to survive, and thrive, in the world they’re about to enter?

 

If you listen on a mobile phone or tablet, please download our Parenting Today’s Teens app available for Apple or Android. If you listen on a desktop or laptop computer, press the “play” button above to enjoy daily parenting advice.

Student Story: Hunter

Your teen is growing up—they’re not babies anymore! And that means you need to adapt to their changing needs. So what are some specific ways you can adjust your parenting technique?

This weekend on Parenting Today’s Teens, Mark Gregston provides tips for raising your young adult with sensitivity and skill

 

If you listen on a mobile phone or tablet, please download our Parenting Today’s Teens app available for Apple or Android. If you listen on a desktop or laptop computer, press the “play” button above to enjoy daily parenting advice.

I don’t spend too much time in the kitchen… I prefer to barbeque on the back porch.  But I do know that recipes make baking a whole lot easier.  The problem comes when we apply the step-by-step process to raising kids!

Adding ingredients in the right order and giving it time in the oven may work in the kitchen… but you’re in trouble if you think that’s the way parenting works!

Raising mature and independent adults takes intentionality.  Focus on building a relationship, listening to your teen, and sticking to your boundaries.  This will be an ongoing process… long after your kids leave the home.

Remember, parenting doesn’t take a simple recipe… it takes a mindset.  And it takes time.

 

If you listen on a mobile phone or tablet, please download our Parenting Today’s Teens app available for Apple or Android. If you listen on a desktop or laptop computer, press the “play” button above to enjoy daily parenting advice.

I recently received this question from a worried parent:  Is there an age where it’s too late to “fix” things?

Maybe you’re at a place where you feel like there’s no going back.  What’s done is done.  It seems like your kids have gone off the deep end… and now they’re even out of the house.

My answer for this concerned father… and for you… is this:  It’s never too late.  God is always working in you, in the situation and in your child.  But you may have to set aside the idea of “fixing” anything.

Perhaps now’s the time for you, as a mom or dad, to trust God… to let Him bring about the restoration you desperately want …and only He can do.

 

If you listen on a mobile phone or tablet, please download our Parenting Today’s Teens app available for Apple or Android. If you listen on a desktop or laptop computer, press the “play” button above to enjoy daily parenting advice.

It’s a question I get asked a lot!  “Should I tell my teen about the mistakes in my past?”   

You and I made a lot of mistakes when we were growing up.  Some were small and stupid.  Others were bigger than we realized… and even changed the direction of our lives!  So… should we share with our kids some of these secret mishaps?  Or will that simply lead to an excuse for them to repeat the cycle?

Well, in my experience, I’ve found that honesty about the past… in age appropriate ways, of course… actually leads to a stronger relationship.  Kids will know you’re not perfect, and you can share the real regret you feel for some of your poor choices.

I think you’ll find that honesty will go a long way for you and your teen!

 

If you listen on a mobile phone or tablet, please download our Parenting Today’s Teens app available for Apple or Android. If you listen on a desktop or laptop computer, press the “play” button above to enjoy daily parenting advice.

Do you find yourself disappointed at times?  Like you can’t measure up to your expectations?  You’re probably rolling your eyes right now thinkin’… “Of course!  Life is hard!”

Yes, life is difficult.  And in the failures, the struggles… the blunders… we’re kept authentic.  I run into many parents who want the world to think their family is perfect.  And the kids in that family unit grow up learning that hardship and struggle are synonymous with failure… and should be avoided at all costs.

The better angle is this:  No one’s perfect.  We all fall… some of us more than others!  And the best part is… the hard stuff yields some of the most profound growth in the long run!

So… keep it real in your family, okay?  Let’s not try to breed perfectionists!

 

If you listen on a mobile phone or tablet, please download our Parenting Today’s Teens app available for Apple or Android. If you listen on a desktop or laptop computer, press the “play” button above to enjoy daily parenting advice.

In our culture, we keep intensely busy.  Schedules are over- done, calendars overbooked… and responsibilities overwhelming!

I don’t know what you’re facing in your life today… but I can imagine that you’ve got a lot on your plate.  That’s not necessarily bad.  Unless it takes away from your family relationships!

If you’re too busy to have fun with your teenage son, you’re too busy.  If you can’t ever seem to fit in an hour for coffee and conversation with your daughter, you’re too busy.

Make room for the most important things in life.  Maybe there’s something inconsequential that needs to drop off your calendar… in order to spend the best part of your day with your teen!

 

 

If you listen on a mobile phone or tablet, please download our Parenting Today’s Teens app available for Apple or Android. If you listen on a desktop or laptop computer, press the “play” button above to enjoy daily parenting advice.