We used to talk about conflict-free relationships, but now, instead of thinking in terms of what it is not, we see it as a quality of peace. In the world, it arises directly from peace between people, and we promote it both through the idea and the direct experience.

Total honesty: why it’s good, difficult, and what’s needed for it to be possible. It arises from working on yourself. You have to know yourself in order to share that with your partner. Resolving conflicts isn’t about changing the other person, but rather looking at what your resistance is about.

The balance between planning and going with the flow can be a problem in a relationship. One person is free and easy, and wants to accept the last-minute offer of a weekend at a cabin; the other had a household project planned. There’s a solution that works for both people.

Neither of us enjoys arguments. It’s not avoidance, it’s that we choose not to act that way. Our desire to share what is happening with each other and to be sure there are no confusions, or any distancing caused by things unspoken, is paramount. It leads to an argument-free relationship.

Touch is an important part of all relationships but can get overlooked. Animals huddle together and groom each other. The messages are of caring and comfort. So it is for humans, too, and if we stop speaking that language, we lose an important way of expressing concern for each other.

It is critical to the success of a peaceful loving relationship to find mutuality, and to create from that place of connection. It can be quite simple to do, especially when it becomes a habit. Make agreements and verbalize them to each other; refer to them aloud periodically.

In any relationship, there can be a feeling of being on the same side that is quite delicious. Whatever it is, become attuned to that feeling, because if it vanishes, that’s a warning signal that you may be swerving into the path of a full-blown argument.

Today, we are sharing about a very basic component of a peaceful loving relationship, and one that can have surprising consequences and ramifications. Commitment. Here, we each describe our personal experience of commitment and the surprising benefits it creates.

It’s the early days of winter and yet it feels like a fresh start. Lots of changes have occurred, and there’s a sense of new opportunities. Come out of these events with renewed hope and a commitment to keep sharing burdens and rejoicing in victories together!

To be in a relationship is to exist in a state somewhere between individuality and union. We must all find our balance between staying in connection and awareness with ourselves, and relating to others and their inner selves. Ideally, we can move smoothly between these states without any struggle.