There are very few emails I actually read unless they are from readers or clients.

I go by subject line... and today I opened an email that was talking about reading, saying that being a slow reader AND being a picky reader is a good thing.

I don't like the dude who sent it. Why? I don't think you have any control over who you like and who you don't.

Just because you should like someone... please don't try to like them. It is like trying to have a bowel movement when you have nothing to give... really.

You can love someone, if your vibration is around 600 or above, and are willing to love them... Love doesn't need you to like someone, by the way. Like is instinctual. Love isn't.

You'll notice that likes have reasons... How come?

Humans make decisions emotionally but justify it with reasons. That's how come.

You like something, a person, a vegetable, an activity for reasons you can't see... because they are biological, I think.

But love is voluntary. Love is a choice. For no reason. You choose to love... or not.

Anyway, I digress.

I wanted to write about that email, and reading slowly, and what that dude was selling in that email.

I read slowly. And I stop often and ponder. That is part of reading. This is why I don't like audiobooks... They go too fast, and it is technical to stop when I want to ponder. So after listening to an audiobook I have symptoms of indigestion.

I am also dyslexic. I can't read for than a few paragraphs on my computer screen. When I read more I get horrible anxiety, disorientation, so I read lying in my bed. And I read a lot.

I read, mostly, fiction.

Very rarely non-fiction. Non-fiction writers mostly bore me even if I am interested in the topic. There are, of course, rare exceptions. Dan Kennedy is very readable to me, for example. Some journalists who act as reporters, like Ian Leslie, are very readable...

And lately I like Andrew Thomas's Hidden in Plain Sight series. A worldview shaper... for me.

But learning more about business, marketing, so I can do it better would be really good...

So when the dude offered a book that he has an exclusive for... thus driving up the price of a book that should be ten bucks, to hundreds, I experienced what a lot of my students experience: 'It is not fair!'

Monsanto and its expropriating seeds came to mind.

Is knowledge something you can hold back because you want to make money with it?

In my early years offering my services a lot of people were unhappy with me. They thought I should give away my time, my energy, my knowledge.

And I did... but everything worth having is going to need your participation... Nothing works on its own. And most people didn't, couldn't use my stuff, and still can't.

Not just my stuff, any stuff.

I remember when I was selling The Healing Codes as an affiliate. I had some friends I was helping. People I knew from Peak Potentials. And they never used the program correctly, and they never got anything out of it. I did, but they didn't.

Most anything you buy because you want the results...

....it won't work for you, even if the thing CAN work... But you don't have the mindset, the soft skills, the understanding, the attitude, the persistence to benefit.

We, as a species, are clueless, half-blind, moronic creatures.

I started The Work almost exactly 11 years ago, on Rosh Hashanah. I launched it officially on Yom Kippur, a week or so later.

Unlike most 'gurus', I evolved myself and The Work, steadily.

I am not saying I was happy that I had to evolve to make it work... and yet...

When I read some of my early writings, I am embarrassed.

Greg Abbott and his prankish methods made me think.

I was curious what the good looking Texas governor's vibration would be so that he finds it OK to play with people, be prankish, and deposit real people through the letter chute.

I could not find a good picture, so you have to see the poop on a car windshield... yeah. That is a perfect illustration to Texas governor and his intent. His age. His vibration... You'll see.

I found a picture through which I could actually connect to the dood. First I suspected that there is no person to connect to... because all I could see was empty black space, but finally I found a video through which I could see reflected light... and I could connect.

Greg Abbott's vibration is 30.

Vibration is a measure of how much of reality, the world you see and from how high, this means that Greg Abbott is not seeing the world except from what is visible from the basement.

What would make someone live in that basement? Through anger. And what would make a state, a large state elect a man for governor like that?

The average vibration is 100 in the world. But in Texas the average vibration is 70. A one-time student who lives in Texas, whose vibration is now 100 is head and shoulders above her environment. In New York she would be miserable... New York's average vibration is 170.

How do politics and worldview connect? How do politics and vibration connect?

Vibration rises when one sees the world, reality more rightly. We can say that a higher vibration person sees in a way that is more aligned with Life, more aligned with Life than how and what a lower vibration person sees.

What is the most operative measure with regards to seeing? Seeing the world accurately? Seeing Life accurately?

I would say that it is the 'about-me' measure.

In the 2400 year old questions of Hillel the Elder, most answers to living rightly, seeing rightly can be found.

If I am not for myself, who will?

If I am only for myself, who am I?

And if not now, when?

In the first sentence Hillel says

...that it is your duty, your responsibility to be for yourself, provide for yourself what you need. Don't wait, don't expect, don't hope the 'world' will give you what you need. Give it to yourself.

This has been the most functional and operative 'commandment' that myself and my students have started to implement.

We all live with so-called needs that are fully and completely can be provided for by yourself. Getting respect, validating, being given, told that you are good, whole and complete, loving and lovable, OK don't need another or others... you can give it to yourself. Completely and better than others can.

You can love yourself. Respect yourself. Tell yourself what you need to hear to be OK. But, if your vibration is not very high, you haven't.

Your life is about extorting what you want to hear, what you want to get... and if it is about that... it cannot be in harmony with Life.

In the second sentence Hillel says

that if you are only for yourself, then who you are is the only evil there is: desire to receive for the self alone. You want everything and you want what others have. So you rob, steal, cheat, oppress, hoard... and you have misery in your wake. You kill life...

And this is where your about-me score is calling the shot the most.

The about-me score is the percentage of your 'only for myself' and you are about life and in life...

In fact you cannot see the world rightly when you look through the 'about-me' portion of your view... you only see what your self-concern allows you to see. The so-called need you invented at an early age... being superior to others, getting what you want, getting respect, getting attention,

Life gives you much if you give of yourself much.

Of yourself? Yes.

If you give, just an example, money to life, life gives you nothing. Money is not 'of you', is it?

Then if you give time, dutifully, begrudgingly... ditto.

If you cook for your family, but you don't put yourself into your cooking, not giving love, care, nurturing... ditto.

And if you are now confused, get unconfused, and get it. If you put of yourself into what you do, not for yourself, but for life, then life reciprocates it.

So what is yours to give that is of yourself?

Passion? enthusiasm? contribution? Power?

There is another wrinkle that needs to be mentioned: if you give to look good, if you give to be well thought of, if you give to feel better about yourself, then you are not giving of yourself.

Now you see why most people don't get anything more for their effort but money. But money doesn't warm you inside.

One of the things that is happening to my current core group students, for some of them, is that shift of where they give from.

In 2000 I visited Syracuse for the first time. I was here with my then boy friend. I found a simple white book in a bookstore. It was from Osho. It was about maturity... and I devoured it.

After that I read anything I could find from Osho.

Osho didn't write any of it. They are all his transcribed talks, that is why it is so easy to read them. When I muscletested I found that he didn't put any of himself into it. And yet...

I put all of me into reading... All power in all actions... the certain way.

I put all of me into reading them, and allowed these talks to take me around the world of thought and transform my view. And I put all of myself into reading them.

And then, after that I proceeded putting myself into all of my reading. I wasn't standing there holding my hand out saying 'give me, give me'. No I was in there: giving my enthusiasm and getting what I get all at the same time.

That is why reading is so life-giving to me... Especially if the author didn't write those words and kept himself out of them. If and when kept himself out of the book I simply can't get into it, his writing sucks the life out of me.

Same is with food... or with coaching... and it used to be with sex...

Some soul corrections are stingy. Withholding themselves expecting only getting.

But life is cruel. It may give you money, it may give you position, it may give you a beautiful spouse, but it won't give you life... the stuff life is made of.

So lately more of my core group students dip their big toe into giving of themselves... in their work, in our relationship, in the work they do for themselves on themselves, work they do on their worldview.

Some nations, culturally are stingy too. I am not judging, I am assessing.

People of some nations get less out of life than others.

What is underneath is stinginess. A a feeling that says: 'It's not fair'. And maybe 'other people get more than I get' or maybe 'I deserve more' or maybe 'I should be special' and a thousand different expressions of the same thing: they expect more and they are permanently disappointed and disgruntled.

This stinginess can come from the environment: maybe it is not fertile enough. Maybe there are too many people. The place is overpopulated, and the place cannot give more than what they can eke out of the earth. A poor country.

Yeah, life is cruel.

Because if you are stingy you won't want to put yourself into what you do... after all stinginess is a sign of scarcity thinking, you thinking 'I don't even have enough for myself!!!'

And because life reciprocates what you give of yourself, if you are stingy and are withholding yourself,

The most important questions to  ask: what, how, why, when, who not... What not to do, how not to do/be, why not, when not, who not, what not to pay attention to. What's not important. Which teachings are b.s. and a good idea to invalidate or just ignore. The no-list.

Without those questions asked in that particular way, that unusual way, your life cannot be like an arrow, cannot have a punch, cannot have a purpose.

Incidentally this is also the path of the strait and narrow... the Anna Karenina Principle.

So why isn't this part of the culture?

The answer is simple albeit accusatory: without this way of looking at life, querying life a person lives in confusion, waiting, and disappointed, lost, and still hoping. Waiting. Wanting. Needing.

Why would anyone be interested in keeping you in that state?

Easy and simple: the confused, the waiting, the hoping will reach for ANYTHING... buy anything... because the gaping emptiness inside wants to be filled.

So religion, commerce, politics will want you right there.

They work consistently and constantly to keep you there.

Except a very few individuals.

The worst of these are the wolves in sheep's clothes. Spiritual teachers, money making, wealth gurus, and the likes.

One of my students has embarked on the 360 degree view of the world.

A journey of 67 distinct steps. She is 'consuming' one audio a day and then spends about the same amount of time pondering and reporting to me.

Before she took this step she had already spent five months in intense training with me, so she had already started to see more more accurately.

This is a requirement, seeing already more clearly, for the journey...

Without that she would have seen what she had always seen.

Would that be bad? Hell yeah. She didn't come to me for training because she was fulfilled and happy. She came to me because she wasn't.

So in the usual digging process we dug up much of what delusional decisions she had made about herself, about people, about life, about what works and what doesn't. What should be and what shouldn't.

Without that she would have refused to 'surrender' to listening to this dude who 'everyone knows is only about the money', blah blah blah. That he is part of the evil Dark Side.

Whatever worldview you bring into a program is what you will listen through.

And unless some dramatic transformation happens, you will leave with the same worldview, untouched, unaltered in any way.

But if your worldview gives you your life, your actions, your everything! So then, ultimately, the job of any program that wants to deliver on its promise is to spend time to cause that dramatic transformation: the alteration of the worldview in some relevant way.

And you need to be willing for that to happen, if you want to have a life where you can go for what you want and actually have a chance to get it.

Can that happen in a short course?

The first 'leg' of that transformation can... definitely. But what actually happens? You see something different/ You see something so different from what you had been seeing that it can cause a transformation... but.

But what?

But for that new view to stay open so it can be the view that gives you your actions, you need to generate that view through diligent poking, diligent practicing, through diligent widening that opening. It is merely an opening...

It starts out about as wide as a keyhole... do doors still have a keyhole? lol.

And then it closes. What you saw, at best, becomes a memory. But a memory is not in reality, it is a picture of reality... it is in the mind... so in reality that opening is now actually closed.

In the worst case you go the way of the many: yesterday's transf...

Just so you know, when I wrote that title I had suddenly a sharp reaction in my gut... Fear...

I'll spend the rest of the day looking at that... very interesting. The word that set it off was the word 'everything'... So if you reacted the same way... let's look together!

Your relationship to money, revealed, will shed light to everything in every area of your life.

But it is harder to see them in other areas of life, while in the area of money it, they are easier to see and catch.

The movie Trading Places was funny but wholly and totally psychologically unfounded... Its authenticity ended just after the scene where the Black dude (played by Eddie Murphy) shoves expensive stuff in his pocket to make them his. That was both believable and authentic.

Everything else he did... pure unadulterated bullshit...

But even that one scene, if you look at it as a window to the primitive man: things are good if you can eat it, screw it, or kill it... otherwise ignore it is a great teaching through tens of thousands of years from the past.

But do we heed it?

Hoarding, for example, is a mistaken concept: unless it is food, hoarding anything will make it more difficult for you to move, to adapt, to be alert, and to survive.

So in the Moneyroots workshops we actually look at habitual thinking, habitual behaviors that doesn't serve us, that weigh us down, that reduces our chances for survival and a good life.

Who is this for?

I would say for anyone who can believe that something in their habitual way of thinking, habitual way of seeing the world is limiting them from actually doing what would make them happier, more productive, to have more freedom, time for themselves, or to love themselves.

Some misunderstanding. Misunderstanding the world. How it is.

And once that misunderstanding as straightened out, they can become more... whichever way they are less than they would like to be.

It's about life... not about money.

We use money because it is most visible when we ask questions about money. The how of it.

Who is it most useful for?

This workshop is most useful for people who are already successful, or at least somewhat successful in life.

Why? Because what keeps you at the bottom, i.e. if you are the least successful, is so profoundly jarring (if you can see it, that is) that if you are at the bottom, you probably won't be willing to change your mind about it.

Your family, your traditions, your friends who you grew up with, your friends you hang out with all think the same way... you would need to leave them to be able to have any traction on you what you see.

I haven't been successful at causing lasting transformation for people on the bottom.

So if you are on the bottom, I can't promise you anything beyond the fact that you will see what keeps you on the bottom... but because lifting yourself up is up to you, and what keeps you on the bottom is that you think it isn't... it is a catch22...

What if you are somewhere in the middle in regards to success?

I am talking about YOUR success, not your spouse's success. If you consider yourself successful because your spouse is bringing in the bacon, you are probably on the bottom yourself, as far as your worldview is concerned. Even if you yourself have a job...

But if you have a profession or a skillset that allows you to make money that provides for you and for your family, you are likely in the middle range of success.

Will this workshop be useful for you?

Yes. You will see ways that you are your worst enemy, and will see a way to change your ways... in the area of money, and in other areas too: health, relationships, and Self.

And what if you are rich,

I don't really care about the mating habits of water buffalo... but I can't look away...

I heard that little ditty yesterday on Amazon Prime Video. And I laughed for quite a few minutes.

And I think it describes some people's relationship to my articles, to my teachings. I think people are fascinated or can't look away... But that doesn't mean they care about what I teach. Or doing anything with it.

The rare specimen that does makes it all worthwhile...

I don't cater to the lowest common denominator... the easily titillated... so I have only a few people who read my articles. When I look at everyone else, TV, Social Media, websites... I see that they do cater to the low... otherwise they would not stay in business, I think.

Everyone blames social media, but the media is just the medium: the low vibration comes from people. And no one takes personal responsibility for their own vibration, for how they see the world, and for how they spread darkness.

And most people do. Spread darkness.

The ones that are sure they aren't are part of the evil by doing nothing.

All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

Edmund Burke (British statesman) didn't say this. What he said is this:

When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall, one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle.

And later another British philosopher said:

Bad men need nothing more to compass their ends, than that good men should look on and do nothing.

So this is the age (again?) where we live... and maybe, just maybe, people who subscribe to my site are 'good men' or at least fancy themselves good... but they definitely do nothing.

So what is there to do? Fight the bad men? Futile. Wasted energy.

So what can a good man do that would matter?

This is a real question and I am pondering.

I have one student who, I think, is doing what a good Man is to do to balance out the bad, who is doing what you would do if you considered yourself with a fire that unless it's attended to, will burn out.

Because Life, intelligent life is on its way out... unless...

Unless you do what the philosophers of old said: your job is to make the most of yourself.

Isn't that selfish? It is Self-ish. And it is noble. It is generous. It is grand... especially in times where the world is rooting for fun and games. For the orgy.

Will those, can those turn the tide around?

I don't think so. But there is joy, their is fulfillment, there is self-love when you do it. For you. Because you matter.

I read that one student's reports to me, and I learn more about what it was like for her before she started to awaken herself... and embark on this work of becoming all she can become.

The ones that are in the middle of it have very little to say. But given that she has climbed, at least partially, out of the pool of 'water' that she used to sit in, she can look and compare.

The students that have never been outside of the pool don't even have words, and definitely don't have comparison. They may compare with their imagination... but it is mostly what they fancy other people have, like they fancy that I roll in dough. So their assessment of the pool is in comparison to a fancy, that is unreal.

And, of course, one of the reason they don't do anything to get out of the pool, because of that fancy... it looks impossible to attain... and it is.

Life outside of the pool is harder than inside the pool. It has pain, effort, going without, discomfort... and fulfillment. And joy. And maybe even love.

It doesn't sound that attractive compared to the no pain, no effort, no going without, no discomfort unless you are in my class and I yell at yo...

When I teach you, do you learn? How would I know?

No preamble, no hello, no niceties: Unless you do life the way I taught you to do it, you didn't learn.

Unless you understand that the power of knowledge is in what it enables you to do... because only action matters. Only action will get you what you want..

Unless you know that, unless it is not a 'know about', not information, but it is in your muscles, you'll remain disadvantaged.

You don't have to be a minority. You don't have to have government or society created obstacles in your path. Even without obstacles you won't even attempt to walk the path.

What makes you disadvantaged is that you didn't get that only action will matter. Action with integrity.

And not even any action: productive action.

70% of those actions are inner... Inside... In the privacy of your own head. 70%.

If you didn't get into the habit of doing things, making things, organizing things as a child, it will be hard for you to start as an adult.

And if you had parents who thought that having the right answer is the key to a more respected place in society, you are hosed.

If your friends and social circle are where you are: feel disadvantaged and thus blame society, or some segment of it, their parents, the boss, the man... you are really really hosed.

If you feel disadvantaged... even if it is only your genes that you blame, I bet you are not looking.

Looking is an action. Seeing is an action. Seeing in reality, seeing what is real without the opinion you inherited or added from the immense wisdom of your own is THE crucial action.

But they are a 'unit'... and it all starts with looking.

It is very difficult for a teacher, a trainer, to find a suitable exercise regimen to teach you to look.

I may tell you to look, and you hear something else. Maybe you hear: learn, understand, be able to repeat... That is not what I asked you to do, but that is what you hear.

And guess: if you don't actually look, you won't see, and won't see accurately. And if you always look in the same place, your mind... then you'll always see what you have always seen.

So if you don't look and you don't see and you don't see accurately, then every action, every doing that comes out of that looking will not be any different than what you have been doing all along.

It would be so easy to blame your cognitive abilities or the lack of them. But almost any human's brain is capable for a whole lot more than what they get out of that brain...

I measure what your brain can do, what your brain can produce, and then I compare it with what you actually produce with it.

99% of people I measure in the Starting Point Measurements produces less than 1% of what their brain can produce. And then there are some people, the 1% who can.

How do I know? Their curiosity score is higher than 1%, and their astuteness level is higher than 1%.

Only 1% of the people who ask for their numbers test higher in those areas.

And only 1% of those want to be trained to be more, have more, do more. More of what? More of everything. More life in their years. More joy, more experiences, more love, more accomplishment. More life.

So, from this, you can see that I am screwed royally.

The numbers are similar everywhere, except that my measures are more stringent...

Bigger companies screen students for who is worth training to lead. Lead the programs.

One in ten thousand is trainable, but being trainable doesn't mean they want to lead YOUR programs... maybe they want to do what THEY like to do... and be productive in the world.

So this is why, for example, Landmark Education has only about 50 Forum Leaders ...

I keep on explaining people that the only way to get to a good result is through bad results, failures, but I don't think I am heard.

It is true for everyone... it is definitely true for me... and I don't have to like it.

Yesterday we worked on distinguishing misdirecting our power vs leaking our power.

Power is what you have to get things done, to accomplish things.

It is a finite amount, although you can grow it over time... but in any moment what you have available to you is finite.

Now, most people use 1% or less of their power to get things done. Exceptional people use 10-30%.

It's a similar number to how much of your brainpower you use to do what the brain is designed to do: solving problems. So you shouldn't be surprised.

But what about the 99%? Well, that is what you either misdirect, misuse, or leak.

One of the ways you can detect is time... time you don't use productively to life or work or relationships, etc.

But you misdirect and leak most of your energy, even when you are doing something for your life or for your work.

Now that I distinguished this phenomenon, I find myself looking through that distinction to all of life. How I leak or misdirect my power.

It was cold last night and I got myself a sore throat, the first in as many years. It was warm under the blanket when I woke up at 2 am. I decided to stay under the blanket. But the trade was: get up, and spray my throat so it starts healing... or remain in the bed and not be able to fall back to sleep...

I fell asleep again two hours later... So I leaked 2 whole hours of my life.

It's 5:30 am and google is still limping like an old lady. It is refusing to send my mail...

Frustration. Helplessness.

Another huge leak. A combination of misdirected attention and leak.

Finally I find an alternative way to send out reports people paid for... But now I am teeeeeeense, my shoulders hurt, I find I am gritting my teeth. Lots of power is leaking.

Without power, without increasing the amount of power that goes towards creating a good life your life cannot get better.

I think that the most important thing for you, if you want a better life, is to learn how to allocate more of your power to having a good life, instead of leaking it or misdirecting it.

Most of this misdirecting and leaking doesn't happen in the visible domain of reality

Most of it is underground, invisible, and therefore not within your conscious power to change, unless someone helps you to see what is in the invisible that is causing the mischief.

For example for a number of participants, including myself, the leak happens because of the unwillingness to be appreciative. To appreciate what is... however it is. Neither the good, nor the bad.

Today's exercise in frustration with google is a visible component, by the way. A visible sign of misdirected energy but not of why, the root... that the root is that inability or unwillingness to appreciate what is.

To want reality to be the way reality is. Even saying that sentence gives me a tooth-ache... lol.

The frustration has been sticking to me like water would stick to a duck's back if it weren't a duck... and sink it.

Luckily, unlike humans, ducks shake off the water... it rolls off their backs.

I 'normally' have 91% of my energy and power available for life... but I just muscletested: it dropped to 70%.

The more of your power you have available for life the more you can get done in the same amount of time

The more attention you can have, the more joy you can have...

And what is even more important: you can have time for yourself where the time is for you only. To do what you want with. For me it's reading... I love reading.

Mental Bandwidth and what to do to increase it

If you ordered a large pizza but you had to share it with everyone in your neighborhood, then even after ordering a hundred of those, you would barely get a slice, right? Some teenagers can eat half of a large pizza themselves, so unless you protect your pizza, you'll remain hungry.

If an internet company sells you service, but they have all their thousands of customers want to watch a movie, you'll get a spotty connection and miss half the movie.

That is bandwidth... it is limited and the more people use it, the less remains for you.

Mental Bandwidth

The same thing happens when you want to read, or listen to an audio, talk to someone... the more things demand your attention the less remains for the 'main event', what you actually wanted to do.

For humans, the dinner 'guests' that eat your pizza are thoughts, emotions, ideas, physical pain, and outside interruptions.

And if your attention has anything to do with what you do, then you will get less done, and what you'll get done will not be done well, will it?

So if we wanted to get more done, faster, and get it done better, then making sure that more of your attention and energy goes to it, instead of going to your emotions.

People who get more done are not necessarily smarter than you.

They have one thing that they do better than you: they take control their attention better, and allow and ignore the thoughts, the emotions, and the noises.

In yesterday's free workshop we kicked this ball around... the whole idea that you can get more productive, get more done in less time, and better... but how?

And more than that: you can use this to grow. Grow how much you can get done, and how well.

You can use this to free up more of your time for the things that you really want to do... hobbies, passions, because that is the real reason you may want to get more productive.

Work

Work has a tendency to stretch to occupy the time allocated to it... so people are used to do what they need to do with as little intensity as they can, lest the 'boss' gives them more to do.

But in today's day and age, and being able to produce more in less time, you can use the time allocated to work to develop skills, to get so good at something that your 'job' is too small for you. You can outgrow your job.

And if you don't have a job-job, and you don't want to grow your skills, you can use all that time to finally 'have' a business, instead of the business having you... and allowing you no time for hobbies, for fun, for the things you love to do but don't make money.

I love to read. I used to work all day, all evening, and have time to read only for an hour before I turned the light off and went to sleep.

The idea that I can get faster and better by focusing all my power into a laser beam came to me just a few years ago.

I started this process by first reducing the outside interruptions, and then the inside interruption. By setting the context of what I was doing so even when it wasn't my favorite thing to do, it became part of 'it's all it a day's work' and therefore I wasn't resisting it. Resistance would have robbed my bandwidth!

I still resist about 9% of the time... but the 91% of the time I am laser beam focused. And take frequent breaks, 5-10 minutes every hour. Even from reading... So I never get stiff, I never get tired... and recover all my energy in those short breaks.

But I built up to it... little by little.

It's taken me five years to go from needing 12-14 hours a day to get the work done to needing only five hours a day for same amount of work.

What is very interesting to me is this: I didn't realize what I was doing. I was just using repetition to get better...

The invisible dynamic of integrity

Less than a year after I graduated, I worked as an architect at this company, walking distance from my home.

I didn't know that I was an empath at the time. Interestingly not knowing didn't prevent me from feeling it.

It was an office building on the corner of my street and a big street... forgot its name. I haven't been there almost 39 years.

So one day I walked home to get lunch. On my way back I actually saw  the building collapse. The streets were closed for weeks... No one got hurt: the crew was out to lunch.

As an empath I felt clearly what caused the collapse: in a pillar in the basement one rebar was missing... A one dollar item, maybe even cheaper.

Unfortunately I am probably using the wrong words... but the error was tiny, seemingly insignificant, and yet it leveled a 12 story building.

There is a Russian engineer, Grabovoi, who is probably still in prison. His claim to fame was that he could tell where the error with airplanes was, what was going to cause their breakage, or failure. I assume he was an empath.

Then he graduated to create his own 'codes' to heal cancer... that is why he is in prison. Because the fact that he can tell where something is, doesn't mean a code or incantation, or what the hell he suggested to do would work. I wrote an article about that... here. No integrity, utter bullshit, exploiting people's desire to fix what they have created themselves.

With integrity anything less than all is not good enough. Life is unforgiving...

And no, it is not perfectionism.

Perfectionism would be doing something with the little bit... I am talking about quantity.

Instead integrity is about taking things to their completion.

Completion is Life's game.

Integrity's basic, not detailed definition is that the thing is whole AND complete. No parts missing. It's all there, and it is working.

Bend or take out just one spoke of a bicycle wheel and in short order the whole will disintegrate... And such is life. It is either integrity or no integrity. No gray areas.

But what about OUR life? Can our life have integrity?

After all we, and I mean we all, have had experiences that we swept under the rug, and now operate in life as if they didn't exist.

But they do exist, and make our life have no integrity.

What do I mean?

I mean the pain, disappointment, grief, sadness, blame we are not dealing with, because we have no hope they can disappear... and most of the time we are wrong about that.

Completion is a cooperative act:

you retell, revisit with the intention to let the thing go, with the intention to see in new, with the intention to hold no prisoners.

Also, it is useful to have a listener. Someone who allows you to feel what you feel without judgment, without getting all entangled. Allows you to express what and how you express. Who mounts no resistance, who can take it, who doesn't think sadness, crying, sobbing, shouting is wrong.

Who doesn't think that death, firing, killing, maiming is wrong...

Because the moment that person who listens thinks that they control the conversation, and there need not to be lying and exaggeration, and they try to manipulate... this will result in NO clearing and no completion.

I recently fired my assistant. I had my reasons. The person took it well, at least so it seemed. On the other hand, one of my students grieves over it, even though they had no interactions.

She had the same reaction when I took someone out of the core group.

She can't allow life to be life... she has an ideal she tries to enforce.

If you pay attention to how she speaks, she talks beautiful and big words... If you are ever sad, sick,