While the concept of pivoting, turning in a different direction, is the new spin on how to address a life challenge, but when faced with catastrophic challenges we can’t pivot. Whatever has happened to us is permanent, a lasting reminder of how our life has changed. 

Catastrophic life events alter our physical and energetic congruence, the fit and flow of energy in our lives that we carefully guard so our lives feel right, they make sense, and we feel safe and secure. Above all, we need to have harmony, where the energy flows effortlessly and we feel in control.

Congruence is part of our 5 energy priorities and they are an important aspect of our 360 degree energy model, a process I created in my trademark Becoming 360™ process. When that model is interrupted, or shattered, we lose all of our focus and grounding, our energy is scattered and chaotic as we try to bring ourselves back into energetic harmony, back into a reality that makes sense, where we feel safe and secure.

But as you know, with catastrophic life events, the past is over and a new reality has started, whether we like it or not. Usually we don’t because it means a total overhaul of our energy priorities, our Becoming 360™ model, and our entire life.

Have you ever noticed that anyone who has experienced a significant life trauma divides their life into two parts, events before the trauma and events after the trauma. The life trauma becomes a marker, a dividing point between old and new, comfortable and uncomfortable, the life we wish we still had vs the one we have to deal with now.

Now we have to learn to point in a new direction, using our energy to create a new life path that integrates our challenge into a new life paradigm. Pivoting doesn’t work, pointing is how we learn to integrate the challenge and make our life work again. 

Imagine the soldier who loses his legs and has to decide how he’s going to manage his life now.

The mother who loses her children and husband, as one of my clients did, and has to create a new life for herself.

The person who dedicates their life to a career that abandons them and they have to start over.

The wife whose husband leaves her and she has to figure out how to survive alone.

There are countless examples of people who have to learn to point in a new direction because pivoting is not an option. Pivoting implies leaving the challenges behind, somehow abandoning the catastrophe and simply starting in a new direction.

Pointing, on the other hand, means we move forward with all of our baggage, the inconveniences, life and health challenges, the pain, the regrets, and the aftermath of whatever has irrevocably just changed our life. No matter how much we wish they were not part of our life now, they are and we have to do more than just learning to live with them, we have to learn to thrive with them and in spite of their limitations, challenges, and annoying inconveniences.

My old life ended on November 21, 1963 and a new life, that I did not consciously choose or want, began on November 22, 1963. I could not pivot away from the paralysis or nerve or muscle damage or loss of balance. Those would be with me for the rest of my life. I had to learn to point in a new direction so my energy could expand and I could thrive in spite of my challenges.

How do you learn to point? Let’s look at the 5 steps to that process

P is for Process – we have to process the challenge and its aftermath. We go through various stages of denial, grief, anger, acceptance, and then finally repurposing the challenge into something we can learn to live with and even excel with. Or we can give up and stop living altogether. That’s a choice too.

O is for Ownership – it’s so easy to fall into the victimhood of ‘why me’ and to deny the presence of this challenge.  We can even wish it would go away and hope that somehow we, or the universe, can manifest a miracle and make it all go away. This is our new reality and we have to own it

I is for Integration – since I pioneered the concept of integration in my writing 15 years ago, I have been teaching that this is a process of fitting in, of bringing new elements into our life and creating physical, emotional, and energetic space for them. Integration is the most important aspect of manifestation and it is the least spoken about. It should be because it is the primary reason why we fail to get what we want, manifest new opportunities, and have lasting joy

N is for neutralize fear – we will be afraid – it is very scary to have your life change instantly by situations that you cannot control and then to have to remake your life to integrate them, to try to live a normal life in spite of what has happened to you. Fear is always a constant threat to our well-being, it is an ever present reminder that we cannot control our reality and often, what happens to us. We don’t neutralize fear by ignoring it, overcoming it, or even challenging it. We neutralize fear by recognizing the true source of our fear, which is consequences. Fear is not a thing, we do not fear ‘fear’, we fear consequences. Mitigating consequences means that we address every consequence we fear and create a solution for it. We raise its vibration, find a new energetic angle, and move on.

T is for Taking Control – in spite of what has happened we control the eventual outcome. We control whether we are victimized by our challenges or emerge victorious. WE control whether we stand up or give up, whether we decide we’re going to walk no matter what the doctors say, or take their prognosis and resign ourselves to a life of misery.

Don’t pivot in an attempt to run away from or avoid your life challenges, point ourself in a new direction. Process the grief for the life you will never have, for what you have lost, and then set an intention for a new beginning. 

Take control, learn to rise above the fear by setting new intentions for your life. The old life may no longer be possible but you can create a new point of excellence for yourself and learn to leverage the pain to create a life of joy.

Read the full article on the blog at enlighteninglife.com

Created, narrated, and produced by Jennifer Hoffman.

Artwork by Jennifer Hoffman.

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