Positive Solace with Attika Choudhary

Suyyash Rai is an actor and singer. He came to Mumbai 11 years ago from Punjab, and he started his acting career on the popular Indian show Pyaar Kii Ye Ek Kahaani as Neil Khurana. That was where he met his wife, Kishwer, only for her to murder him in the episode! “In my first show, Kishwer killed me, but we've been working together since. I love capturing her. I can do that better than anyone else!”

He has appeared on many popular tv series like Kya Hua Tera Vaada, and is in the Bollywood film, Aadat, due for release at some point. In fact, that’s where Attika met and first interviewed Suyyash, on the set of Aadat in London, in 2018.

In this penultimate episode of “Positive Solace”, Suyyash and Attika discuss how to find balance and calm through the little things of life and by accepting the good that we have. Just humming a favourite tune can help: “Music makes me happy,” he says - and he gives Attika a little tour of his studio. She points out that it is a lot more complex and high tech for humming a tune!. "If i'm sad or feeling a little off, I come to my studio. I make some music: it keeps me sane. With every new song I compose, I learn something,” Suyyash explains.

He talks about the virus situation in Mumbai and strategies for dealing with it. He is saddened by how it has affected the film industry and the pressures many people - staff and stars - are under. He was deeply moved by the death of Bollywood actor Sushant Singh Rajput who was a close friend. He says how feelings are important: “I choose to express my feelings, to let the other person know what I feel, no matter if I’m angry, sad or happy. If you've given me happiness, I will make sure you know that you've made me smile."

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This week, BBC's Attika Choudhary is joined by Hollywood director/producer and stunt coordinator James Bamford. The two discuss a range of current issues the world is grappling with right now, from racism to Covid-19 and television and film production. James, who has directed episodes of TV smashes, Arrow and Batwoman, had an early career as a Juvenile Corrections Officer in Canada, before switching to film and TV through his love of martial arts. He touches upon his work in Bollywood with film stars Salman Khan and Katrina Kaif and shares, very candidly, his responsibilities as a father and as a filmmaker and the importance of diversity and equality. The two share the joys and pains of life right now with sensitivity and a smile.

The following links are to help and support some of the causes James feels most strongly about.

The Conscious Kid - https://www.theconsciouskid.org/donate

Canadian Red Cross - https://www.redcross.ca/how-we-help/violence-bullying-and-abuse-prevention/educators/child-abuse-and-neglect-prevention

Canadian Child Abuse Association - https://www.canadahelps.org/en/charities/canadian-child-abuse-association

Legal Defense and Educational Fund - https://80th.naacpldf.org/

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Attika Choudhary, and Babs Withers who is a mother and a district nursing sister, delve into the realities of grief, before, during and after the pandemic. This is all in a heartfelt episode, that might bring you to tears, but will resonate with anyone who has ever lost someone and those who are trying to support their friends, family, and loved ones, hit by grief in the wake of the Covid-19 crisis.

Babs lost her daughter to Metastatic bowel cancer in November last year. One year before her daughter, Georgina, had been diagnosed with cancer but at the time there was hope of a cure. However, last July, it was found that Georgina’s cancer had spread and was terminal. At the age of 32, Georgina who was just married for 18 months, had to leave her life behind along with her husband and loved ones. On the day of her funeral, her mother Babs was still in a state of shock.

They also discuss what positives have arisen from the pandemic, like the many "Chelsea Flower Show" gardens that have sprung up across the country, or hoe people are having real conversations with their neighbours because they now have time to talk. Now neighbours are meeting on driveways and in gardens like never before with tea parties, and barbecues and neighbours looking out for each other.

The speakers also explore mental wellbeing - and how differently men and women might grieve They look the networks that are so important for those in need. Just a card or a phone call, showing care, can mean so much to people. Those who grieve are often in a state of shock and struggle to reach out to others at the time when they need support most. “Going back to basics" of support can be so important: a simple, "How are you?" can mean so much. Nothing prepares you for death and people grieve differently. But we are not alone key to this support is communication.

Georgina's passion was the natural world - she had a zoology degree. If anyone wishes to donate, here are just a few links: https://www.greyhoundlifeline.co.uk/ WWF (World Wide Fund for nature) https://www.wwf.org.uk/ The Withers family contributed to The Royal Marsden Hospital where Georgina received her treatment. https://www.royalmarsden.org/ https://www.pth.org.uk/ Phyllis Tuckwell Hospice Care where Babs has been seeking bereavement counselling.

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This week is Loneliness Awareness Week and as lock-down eases for some lock-down is normality. In this episode of Positive Solace Attika Choudhary talks to Steve Gilbert OBE FRSA about mental illness. Steve is what is described as a living experience consultant and is a suicide survivor. He was a vice chair of the UK government’s recent mental health act review. He suffers from bipolar disorder and depression. Steve & Attika discuss the struggles people with mental health problems face on a daily basis and how society often sidelines them. They also look at the impact on the black community as well as other minorities and what we can do to improve the situation for everyone. Steve is committed to improving outcomes for people living with mental illness. He was recognised in the 2019 Queen’s Birthday Honours List and appointed an OBE for services to mental health.

Steve has so much to share about how we can turn the tide on mental health and make our society more caring and nurturing and reduce misery, isolation, suffering and loneliness – and even if your not, learn how you can help those that are and identify the signs you can see to help them!

In the wake of recent events, he created an anti-racism resource – please check it out -- www.stevegilbertconsulting.co.uk/antiracism-how-to-be-an-ally

There are also a number of charities that you reach out to help here are just a few:

- https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/?gclid=CjwKCAjw26H3BRB2EiwAy32zheBqR4j2ks0rqQpxWgISBMNs4UOkn8dbAY8_djP5efWlK2IghgZL0RoCQgIQAvD_BwE

- https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/#:~:text=Infoline%3A%200300%20123%203393&text=We're%20open%209am%20to,to%20get%20help%20near%20you

https://www.rethink.org/aboutus/what-we-do/advice-and-information-service/?gclid=CjwKCAjw26H3BRB2EiwAy32zhZKPLTAPxr-A6aWEvOTVeR4BJZVg9b--UrEItodXwFSAhpYWsz3IaRoCz0YQAvD_BwE

https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/contact

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Attika Choudhary discusses the extraordinary project of a white woman, Melissa DePino, and a black woman, Michelle Saahene, who met through the Starbucks incident in 2018 and founded “From Privilege to Progress”.

Their aim is to change the way white people think from a position of privilege to understanding things from a black person’s point of view, and how we, as a community of all colours, have a duty to tackle racism by calling it out whenever we see it.

They discuss the current Black Lives Matter protests sweeping across the Western world, sparked by the death of George Floyd. The women see re-education as key to fighting racism.

They feel there are two different Americas - one for whites and another for blacks; even speaking about racism seems difficult for many whites. The protests should mark a crucial point for improvement.

For the many white people involved in the protests, it may be the first time they have come face-to-face with police brutality. It is something that black people have had to live with since the creation of the modern police force. If white people would learn and speak out from their position of privilege, adding their voices to black people everywhere, it should be possible to oppose and eventually dismantle the racist system and put an end to the discrimination that seems to be endemic in Western police forces.

Below are some links to help you get started should you wish to sign petitions, donate and educate and learn. You can find @privtoprog on instagram.

https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/

https://justiceforbreonna.org/

https://8cantwait.org/

https://www.naacpldf.org/

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Xa9Av-NfuFsWBHlsMvPiqJHdNedZgnCRW56qAS-7PGQ/mobilebasic?urp=gmail_link

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This week, BBC's Attika Choudhary is joined by Hollywood director/producer and stunt coordinator James Bamford. The two discuss a range of current issues the world is grappling with right now, from racism to Covid-19 and television and film production. James, who has directed episodes of TV smashes, Arrow and Batwoman, had an early career as a Juvenile Corrections Officer in Canada, before switching to film and TV through his love of martial arts. He touches upon his work in Bollywood with film stars Salman Khan and Katrina Kaif and shares, very candidly, his responsibilities as a father and as a filmmaker and the importance of diversity and equality. The two share the joys and pains of life right now with sensitivity and a smile.

The following links are to help and support black brothers and sisters

Donate and sign petitions...

https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/#petitions

Bail funds are local, charitable, volunteer-driven collections that help pay bail for those who can’t afford it, including protesters.

https://minnesotafreedomfund.org/

If you’d like to help keep Black people and their allies out of jail, especially those who are protesting police brutality, consider donating to a community bail fund.

https://bailfunds.github.io/

In the fifth episode of Positive Solace, host Attika Choudhary speaks with Devina Guyton, a nurse in a care home in Sussex. They consider the effects of the pandemic and lockdown on care homes and explore ways of coping with the mental stress, as well as the positives that the lockdown has brought to the UK.

They discuss society today, the impacts of the virus on work-life balance and also the impact on elderly residents. Their unscripted, honest talk ranges from the situation in Sussex, to the effects the virus has had on nursing as a profession, and how Devina wants the conversation on Nursing to change, towards the positive aspects of nursing and the benefits of the profession. It also delves into grief and death and how hard it is when people are unable to visit dying relatives.

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Dr Mohamed Kajouj arrived from Syria as a refugee speaking very basic English. He had to learn the language and re-qualify in order to practise medicine in the UK. He now works on the COVID-19 wards in York Teaching Hospital. There are a number of doctors who have come to the UK as refugees but cannot practice because their qualification is not recognised here. Dr Kajouj is campaigning to get this re-qualification process made easier and quicker. Doctors are so needed at this time because the NHS is overstretched. He also talks about his experiences in Syria during the war, and how he dealt with the trauma of the conflict. Although things are calmer now due to the Covid-19 threat, the conflict is far from being resolved. He is concerned about the new symptoms of the virus being discovered and the threat of a second wave. On the positive side, he speaks about well-being, both physically and mentally and the Eid celebrations at the end of Ramadan.

Dr Kajouj is also involved in this campaign: https://act.helprefugees.org/help-refugees/refugee-healthworkers/sign/

Thank you if you can support these charities in any way:

Medecins Sans Frontieres who are busy helping refugees caught in the pandemic: https://www.msf.org.uk/

https://www.nhscharitiestogether.co.uk/

https://helprefugees.org/choose-love/

https://nationalemergenciestrust.org.uk/

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In the third episode of Positive Solace, BBC journalist Attika Choudhary goes on a journey of discovery with Poldark actor Christian Brassington who grew up in a nearby town in Hampshire. Currently living in London, he is a successful professional actor, a humanitarian and an avid supporter of Manchester United FC.

They explore ways of keeping oneself focused during lockdown, and ready to seize opportunities and chart one’s best path, and discuss what life is like in the spotlight and what events have influenced their lives.

Christian is reading bedtime stories to children as part of his response to the current pandemic and is also involved as an ambassador for the following charities:

https://m2m.org/

https://babylifeline.org.uk/home/

https://www.thelucafoundation.org.uk/

*Poldark is a BBC drama series

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