Praxis

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Ever felt that familiar knot in your stomach that signal anxiety creeping in? Have you noticed how you respond when the tension rises - Do you confront, hide, or put on a pleasing demeanor? We're unwrapping these gut reactions to anxiety in our vibrant discussion today, exploring the fight, flight, and fake responses, and how they shape our relationships and emotional growth. And, while we're at it, we do get a little side-tracked with our love for apple cider donuts and fall season charm!

Unmasking the 'fake' response, we dissect the Midwest's infamous 'Minnesota nice' - a seemingly pleasant, but ultimately harmful, method of people-pleasing. It's like sugar-coating reality, luring us into a trap where we forsake our needs for the approval of others. This response may seem harmless or even virtuous, but it chips away at our sense of authenticity and community. We argue that this 'fake' response is as destructive as a confrontational 'fight' response because it erodes honesty within relationships.

Now, you're probably wondering, how does one break free from these default responses? The key lies in self-reflection and understanding how our upbringing, personality traits, and surroundings influence our reactions to anxiety. We explore how Jesus faced his anxieties and consistently exhibited emotional maturity. By the end of our discussion, you'll have practical insights on pivoting from unhealthy defaults, managing anxiety effectively, and fostering deeper, authentic relationships. So buckle up for an enlightening journey into the realm of emotional maturity and anxiety.

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This episode of Praxis is a deep dive into the world of emotional maturity, focusing on the role of anxiety in our lives and relationships. We kick off the discussion with personal stories on our strong opinions about seemingly insignificant matters (Who knew Mac loathed gum and Katie couldn't drink coffee?) to set the stage for a lighthearted yet profound dialogue.

As we traverse the winding paths of anxiety, we shed light on its various sources ranging from scarcity mentality to double binds and the ensuing tension that arises with responsibility. Unravel the mechanics behind our physiological responses and the 'thinker, feeler, doer' continuum that aids us in managing our anxiety better. We also delve into the intricacies of handling anxiety in relationships, emphasizing the need to distinguish between our responsibilities and those of others.

Wrapping up, we venture into the realm of curiosity, a powerful tool in anxiety management. Drawing inspiration from Jesus' non-anxious leadership model, we discuss how we can embody a non-anxious presence with emotional maturity. Join us, as together, we peel back the layers of anxiety and uncover practical ways to manage it better.

Mentioned in this episode

• Managing Leadership Anxiety by Steve Cuss
• Unwinding Anxiety by Judson Brewer
• An overview of the Four Spaces of Anxiety from Truth Applied

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We are in a series right now on emotional maturity where we are looking at four components that comprise emotional intelligence and one thing that makes what we are doing a bit unique is that we are attempting to do this while keeping our eyes on Jesus to see how Jesus embodied these things. So far we’ve talked about self-awareness, self-regulation, and social awareness. And today we are going to discuss the ins and outs of relational management.

Relational management refers to our ability to communicate clearly, maintain good relationships with others, connect with those from other cultures, work well in teams, and manage conflict. Relationship management is using your awareness of your own emotions and those of others to manage interactions successfully. It's a lifelong journey of learning and something that we never arrive at but the benefits to our relationships are so worth it.

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Social awareness refers to the ability to perceive, understand, and consider other people's perspectives, needs, and behaviors. It's complex. It's hard work. It's a lifelong process of learning. It's taking all we discussed in our last episode about self-leadership and adding another layer to it where we are attuned to other people's emotions.

So in this episode, we take time to discuss what social awareness is, what it looks like when we are living into it, and how we can grow.

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Today we discuss an important component of emotional maturity: self-leadership or self-regulation. We take time to define what it is, compare the difference between those with self-regulation and those without it, and discuss ways that we can grow into it.

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We are in a series right now on emotional intelligence and how it is essential to discipleship. Dallas Willard once said that "Jesus is the smartest man who has ever lived" and we believe that to be true, including when it comes to emotional intelligence. We believe that Jesus had more EQ than any other person that has ever walked the planet and consistently embodied emotional maturity and so, if we are going to grow as disciples of Jesus, we must grow our emotional maturity. An important component of emotional maturity is self-awareness. So today we continue in this series by talking about what self-awareness is and how we can begin to grow into it.

Mentioned in this episode

• Prayer of Examen
• Emotions wheel and EQ Matrix can be found on our website

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Today we are jumping into a new series on Emotional Intelligence. Dallas Willard once said that "Jesus is the smartest man who has ever lived" and we believe that to be true, including when it comes to emotional intelligence. We believe that Jesus had more EQ than any other person that has ever walked the planet and consistently embodied emotional maturity and so, if we are going to grow as disciples of Jesus, we must grow our emotional maturity. Growing in emotional maturity is an essential part of following Jesus and living as disciples.

In this episode we provide a basic introduction to Emotional Intelligence: what it is, why it matters and how we can begin growing into it.

And to help get us started and set the stage for the rest of this series, today are joined by two very good friends, and our first guests ever on Praxis, Trisha Taylor and Jim Herrington from The Leader’s Journey.

Mentioned in this episode

• The Leader's Journey Website
• The Leader's Journey Podcast
• Managing Leadership Anxiety by Steve Cuss
• Extraordinary Relationships by Roberta Gilbert
• Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman
• Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves

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Today we’re wrapping up our series on our core values asa church and we want to do so by talking about this inevitable reality that none of us – no individual or organization or church – can perfectly live into one’s values. And when we fall short of our values – when there is a gap between our values and actual behavior – it creates a mess. So in this episode we want to talk about how to clean up messes in a way that actually increases trust and encourages the ongoing pursuit of living into our values with integrity.

Mentioned in this episode

• Praxis Podcast Survey
• Learning Change by Jim Herrington and Trisha Taylor

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Today we’re talking about our sixth and final core values as a church which is reconciliation. We believe that reconciliation is at the center of the gospel. And so, as a church, we seek to both model and join God’s reconciling work in the world. We want to be part of God’s work of righting all that’s wrong in the world. In this episode we provide a theology of reconciliation and then practically discuss what it means to live as a peace-making community in an increasingly polarized and divided world.

Mentioned in this episode

• Mending the Divides: Creative Love in a Conflicted World by Jon Huckins & Jer Swigart
• The Stuff That's Shaping Us - Praxis Blog Post
• The Crosspoint Community - Facebook Group

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Today we’re talking about another one of our core values as a church which is Team Leadership. We believe that leadership in the church is really important, which is why it is so painful when it goes sideways. So in this episode we break down some of the primary variables contributing to church leadership fails and then we offer a team leadership model as a healthy alternative. A model where authority is diffused among a team of mature Jesus followers who are submitting to one another and the leadership of the Holy Spirit. And we will share what that looks like for us practically here at Crosspoint.

Mentioned in this episode

• When Narcism Comes to the Church by Chuck DeGroat
• Celebrities for Jesus by Katelyn Beaty
• Redeeming Power by Diane Langberg
• Something’s Not Right by Wade Mullen
• A Church Called Tov by Scot McKnight
• Church as Movement by Dan White Jr. & JR Woodward