3. Discern

1. 1. Your spouse's needs or desires
      1. Insecurity may mean your spouse has a need you can meet
      2. Sexually your spouse may need more (or less)
         1. The issue here is whether or not you are focused on your need or your spouse's need
            1. Each of us should be willing to give of ourselves for the sexual needs of our spouse
      3. Just practically
         1. Maybe he has a hobby that you can attempt to enjoy
         2. Maybe she like Hallmark and you can attempt to watch
         3. Maybe your spouse needs more encouragement, or time, or some such . . .
   2. Little foxes that spoil the vine
      1. Hurts
      2. Conflicts
      3. Busyness
   3. How to handle conflicts
      1. What can you do to overcome conflicts
      2. What are you doing wrong in overcoming conflicts
      3. Staying in a cycle that isn't working is silly
         1. Get counsel
         2. Read some books
         3. Talk and listen
   4. How to handle each season of life

4. Diminish the negatives

• • • Focus on 10% of negatives and you cannot see the 90% positives

5. Different (do something different)

1. 1. 1. 1. Shake things up occassionally
         2. Eat at a different restaurant
         3. Take a "talked about" trip
         4. Splurge

6. Delight in one another