Purpose Without Apology

Guiding Scripture: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

Everyone fails. No matter who you are or how much you’ve accomplished in life, you will eventually face an obstacle that is too much for you. How do we as believers respond when that happens? Is failure really the negative thing we believe it is, or is it really one of God’s greatest ways of teaching us?

1. Lesson #1: Failure is often relative.
   • What seems like a failure to you can be a dream come true for someone else.
   • For example, you may consider it a curse to become an unwed mother, but a woman who is struggling with infertility would consider that same situation a blessing.
2. Lesson #2: Failure is what you do, not who you are.
   • “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.  For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:37-39)
3. Lesson #3: Failure keeps us humble and dependent on God.
   • “‘Master,’ Simon replied, ‘we worked hard all last night and didn’t catch a thing. But if you say so, I’ll let the nets down again.’ And this time their nets were so full of fish they began to tear!” (Luke 5:5-6)
4. Lesson #4: Failure teaches us resilience.
   • “The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. But one disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked.” (Proverbs 24:16)
5. Lesson #5: Failure allows us to experience God’s grace.
   • “But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Action Step: Are there areas in your life where you feel like a failure? If so, why? How is God calling you to rethink those failures and submit them to Him? Pray this week and ask God to show you how to look at those areas differently.

Guiding Scripture: “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:41-42)

As women, we usually do a lot of juggling in our households. Many of us have to manage working, cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children and other family members. With so much that is expected of us, deep rest can often feel like something that’s always just out of our reach. But what if it’s possible to live in a constant state of resting in God? And even better, what if I told you that God designed you to live this way?

1. Resting is much more than just sleep; it’s physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual, too.
   1. Physical: Self-care, i.e., eating healthy, exercising, getting enough sleep, drinking water, etc.
   2. Mental: Getting counseling to maintain good mental health, using discernment on social media
   3. Emotional: Spending time with close friends and family
   4. Spiritual: Spending quiet time with God, reading the Bible, worship
2. Remember the acronym R.E.S.T.: “Remain Everyday Steady and Trusting”
   1. Remain: “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)
   2. Everyday: “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” (Joshua 1:8)
   3. Steady: They [the righteous] will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord. Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear; in the end they will look in triumph on their foes. (Psalm 112:7-8)
   4. Trusting: You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. (Isaiah 26:3)
3. Resting requires boundaries. (Luke 10:42) You have to make it a priority over other things.
4. A warning: If you don’t make time for resting now, you will be forced to rest later.
5. Rest looks different in different stages of life. 
6. Resting in God is like any other habit; it’s something you develop gradually over time. You must always be intentional about pursuing rest.

Action Step: In which areas of your life have you been lacking rest? If you had to pick one area of your life that could benefit most from rest, what would it be? Set aside time to pray and ask God to show you how to rest in Him.

Guiding Scripture: "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)

As believers, we know that uncertainty is part of life. At the time of this recording, the world is grappling with the spread of the coronavirus, but you can replace that crisis with any other (i.e., election cycles, a job loss, a bear market/other economic problems, etc.). The principles in this episode will still apply.

Jesus told us this would happen, but He also promised to give us everything we need to endure and thrive. Here are some suggestions:

1. Trust God and seek Him in prayer (Philippians 4:6).
2. Step away from social media and the news.
   • Studies show that higher amounts of screen time are related to higher levels of anxiety and depression.
   • Try limiting your screen time to certain times of the day, or a certain length of time each day. Avoid checking your phone first thing in the morning or right before bed.
3. Meditate on promises in God’s word that apply to your specific situation. A few I’ve been meditating on lately:
   • 2 Chronicles 7:14
   • Psalm 91
   • Isaiah 54:17
4. Seek advice from knowledgeable experts.
   • For example, if you’re facing a potential job loss, you might take a class on money management or improving your LinkedIn profile.
5. Take action to prepare for the future.
6. Know the difference between fear, faith and wisdom.
   • Fear is not from God (2 Timothy 1:7) and causes us to fixate on our problems, rather than on the God who can solve them.
   • Faith is belief in God and His sovereignty, especially concerning things we can’t control (2 Corinthians 5:7) . 
   • Wisdom is taking action concerning the things we can control (James 1:5).
7. Pray and intercede for others, especially in the body of Christ. This is especially powerful to do with other believers.

Action Step: Think about how you’ve been responding to the areas of uncertainty in your life. Be honest. Do your actions align with the strategies you’ve heard in this episode? If not, what changes can you make today to improve your behavior?

Resources: 

1. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/digital-world-real-world/202002/anxiety-and-social-media-use

If you ask most people what their "calling" in life is, you're likely to get either their job title or a blank stare. But what if your calling isn't meant to be a mystery? What if it's closer than you think? In this episode, we'll discuss the 5 questions that can help you discover your God-given calling, so that you can walk into your destiny with confidence. 

1. What am I better at than most people?
   • It’s not enough for you to do something well. Something you’re good at is a gift, but something you’re exceptional at is more likely to be your calling.
   • For example, I think I'm a good cook, but I'm not good enough to become a chef. I am, however, better than most people at writing.
   • Thinking about your gifts in general terms will keep you confused. You need to drill down and focus if you want clarity. 
2. What do I love to do?
   • There is a lot of debate online about whether you should pursue "passion or profit." I think that misses the point. Your passion is an important part of who you are, and it needs to be acknowledged, even if you don't make a living pursuing it.
   • Your passions can change over time. Some passions are only for a season, and that’s okay.
   • It’s also fine to have more than one passion. 
3. What makes you angry and keeps you up at night?
   • For example, I have a friend who loves animals and hates when they're abused, which led to her taking a job as a veterinarian assistant.
4. What problems are you uniquely equipped to solve?
   • As queen of Persia, Esther was able to use her royal position and her connection to the Jewish people to save them from destruction.
   • As a wealthy German businessman, Oskar Schindler was able to save over 1,200 Jewish people from being sent to concentration camps during World War II. 
   • Look at your upbringing, culture, personality and personal history to help you identify what problems you can solve that few others can.
5. Who are your people?
   • I like to call this your “belong group.” In other words, these are the people who speak your language and respond to your ideas with enthusiasm and support.
   • In business, this is your audience. In church, it may be your area of ministry.
   • No one is called to everyone. Even Jesus was limited in his area of ministry (See Matthew 15:24).

Use these questions to help you decide whether a job, project or volunteer opportunity is the right fit for you. Each individual task you complete won’t check all of these boxes, but the combination of your life experiences (work, family, community, etc.) should.

Action Step:
Take 30 minutes to answer the 5 questions outlined in this episode. Did any of your answers surprise you? If so, how?

References:

• Episode 2: "Purpose, Calling, Assignment: What's the Difference?"

Guiding Scripture: Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. (Proverbs 19:21)

At some point in your life, God will ruin your plans. Here’s why:

1. He has His own plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11).
2. His plans are better than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9).
3. He wants us to trust Him even when we don’t understand (Proverbs 3:5-6).

When God ruins your plans, you have two choices: You can either fight God and hang onto your plan, or let go and embrace His.

How God ruined my plans:

1. I planned to become an attorney, but God led me to change my career track during my senior year of college.  
2. I planned to pursue a career before starting a family, but God sent my husband to me in high school, which led to me getting married and having children at a young age.
3. I planned to be comfortable financially, but God allowed my husband and me to struggle with money for many years.
4. One of my biggest struggles has been that I planned to work in a traditional 9-to-5 job, but God called me to become a stay-at-home/work-at-home mom.

Key Point: Your ruined plans will often be someone else’s dream life. That doesn’t make them any less ruined for you.

3 things to do when God ruins your plans: 

1. Feel your feelings and take them to God. You’re human, and it’s okay to be disappointed.
2. Next, ask God why He ruined your plans and what He wants you to learn from it.
3. Be obedient and make a new plan with God’s help.

Once you've decided to lay down your plans and accept God's, it's important for you to find accountability partners to keep you on track. You will be tempted to go back to your old plans because they’re comfortable and familiar.

Action Step: Get honest with God in prayer about the ways you feel He’s ruined your life. Begin doing the hard work to wrestle with your issues, whatever they are. This will take time. It doesn’t happen overnight.

A lot of women, especially mothers, struggle with the feeling that we're never quite good enough. In this episode, you'll learn that no matter how many mistakes you make, God always gives “grace for the gaps.”

What is grace?

• In many church traditions, grace is defined as “getting the good things that you don’t deserve,” while mercy is “not getting the bad things that you do deserve.”
• My favorite definition comes from a former pastor of mine. He defined grace as “God doing for us what we can’t do for ourselves.”
• Reference Scriptures:

1. 2 Corinthians 12:8-9
2. Ephesians 2:8-9
3. Romans 5:15

What is “the gap”?

• “The gap” is the place where your best efforts fail. You can only get so far in your own strength before you either burn out or give up or both. 
• This could be anything from losing patience with your toddler to juggling the needs of a blended family to struggling with chronic illness. 
• The gap is where you realize your need for God. It doesn’t have to be rock bottom, but it often is. 

Fortunately, God makes His grace available to us in a variety of ways (Hebrews 4:16):

1. It helps us to endure things that are uniquely hard (2 Corinthians 12:8-9). 
2. It empowers us to serve and do other good things we normally couldn’t (1 Peter 4:10).
3. It literally makes salvation possible (Ephesians 2:8-9).

What does this mean?

1. We don’t have to be afraid of experiencing hardship, because God promises that He will sustain us.
2. We also don’t have to be afraid to take a “leap of faith” and try something new, because God will equip us. 
3. He did all the work to help us “get” saved and “keep” our salvation.

What inspired this episode:

• Recently, my son was sick with pneumonia, and of course, I put a lot of things on the back burner so I could take care of him. One of those things was this podcast. I fell behind and didn't release an episode last week.
• At first, I felt guilty about failing to keep my commitment, but then I realized the importance of giving myself grace and receiving grace from a God who loves me. As women, we don't have to be perfect; God gives us the grace to be human, and we should do the same for ourselves.

Action Step: What are some areas of your life where you need an extra measure of grace right now? List them and pray about them in detail over the next 7 days.

Many people here in the U.S. are facing a lot of major decisions right now. Parents are trying to decide whether or not to send their children back to school. Teachers are trying to decide whether to return to their jobs in the fall. And our entire country faces one of the most contentious political elections of our generation in November. How do we as Christians make wise choices in the midst of chaos? 
Here are 5 things I do whenever I need to make a major decision:

1. I get alone, get quiet and ask God for wisdom.
   1. James 1:5 - “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”
   2. Isaiah 30:21 - “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.””
2. I look for answers in the word of God.
   1. Psalm 119:105 - “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”
3. I seek advice from sources/people I trust.
   1. Make sure your inner circle includes people who are mature, discreet and willing to disagree with you.
   2. Proverbs 27:6 - “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”
4. I trust my God-given discernment.
   1. The Bible says that wisdom and knowledge are two of the gifts of the spirit (1 Corinthians 12).
   2. For example, recently I was presented with two investment opportunities that looked good on paper, but something about them just didn’t feel right. 
5. I let God’s peace lead me.
   1. Philippians 4:6-7 - “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
   2. 2 Timothy 1:7 - “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (KJV)
   3. This is arguably the most important step in making major decisions. If you have gone through all the other steps to get here and still don’t have peace, that is almost always a red flag.
   4. Either your lack of peace is being caused by your own fear (which needs to be cast out), or it’s a warning from God about your decision.

Action Step: Are you facing a major decision in your life right now? If so, take some quiet time to follow the steps listed in this episode. Make sure to write down what you discover during each step, whether it’s a prayer or a conversation with someone you trust.

We all say we want to live our lives with purpose, bringing glory to God and expanding His kingdom on the earth. And yet, Jesus tells us over and over again throughout Scripture that the life of a Christian isn’t an easy one. 

Here are 5 things that pursuing purpose can cost you. Are you ready to pay the price?

1. Purpose can cost you popularity.
   1. Galatians 1:10
2. Purpose can cost you comfort.
   1. Luke 9:23 
3. Purpose can cost you relationships.
   1. Matthew 10:34-35
4. Purpose can cost you resources.
   1. Proverbs 3:9-10
5. Purpose can even cost you your life.
   1. Luke 9:24
   2. With the exception of John, all of the 12 disciples are believed to have died violent deaths, many as martyrs for the Christian faith.
   3. Acts 7 tells the story of Stephen, who is widely considered the first Christian martyr.
   4. Estimates vary widely regarding persecuted Christians today, but most faith-based organizations believe that anywhere between 10,000 and 90,000 Christians around the world are martyred for their faith every year. Could you be one of them?
6. Here are 4 rewards that pursuing purpose can give you:
   1. Purpose brings you closer to God.
      1. John 14:21
   2. Purpose will give you protection.
      1. Psalm 91
   3. Purpose can give you prosperity.
      1. Joshua 1:8
   4. Purpose will give you peace.
      1. Psalm 119:165

Action Step: Take some quiet time to meditate on how you may (or may not) be pursuing your God-given purpose. Which areas have you devoted to God? Which areas do you still need to submit to Him? Spend 30 minutes brainstorming, and then ask God to help you fully surrender to His purpose for your life.

I am thrilled and honored to present this special bonus episode of Purpose Without Apology! This is a powerful collaboration with three of my sisters in Christ: Casey Alexis, Stephanie Bright and Torrie Slaughter. You'll hear each of us declare God's truths about racism, injustice and unconditional love through spoken word. I'm so excited for you to hear our unique styles and creativity. You're going to love it! 

Be sure to follow and support: 

• Casey Alexis of Being Eve 
• Stephanie Bright of Christian Girls P.O.P.
• Torrie Slaughter of Our Given Purpose

Their podcasts are available on all major podcasting platforms. Thanks for tuning in!