Quality Control Purposes

Malcolm and Kurt share a shocking follow-up to last episode’s workplace sex club letter, as well as advice regarding letters from:

• A man whose girlfriend is not willing to part with her deceased ex-boyfriend’s memento box
• A woman whose husband is the object of frequent flirting from their younger female coworker 
• A daughter who reconnected with an abusive father on his deathbed — but then he survived!
• A man who wants to know if he can introduce his new girlfriend to his late wife’s vibrator

Plus our new idea for an “astral” advice column, classic Dear Abby letters, and thoughts on love from ChatGPT.

In this episode Kurt and Malcolm offer our not-remotely expert takes on:

- How a widow can tell her annoying former sister-in-law “Barbara” that their “relationship” is over
- Legal options for a woman who wants her portion of the $240,000 left in deceased brother’s dresser drawer
- What a manager should do after discovering a wide-ranging COMPETITIVE sex club operating right under her nose 
- A wealthy man concerned about continuing a relationship with his comparatively impoverished girlfriend

In this episode Kurt and Malcolm offer our expert takes on:

• How a woman in a committed relationship (and a small child) can talk her boyfriend into pursuing polyamory
• The best way for dealing with a Facebook friend who copycats to such an extent we fear she’s looking to commit murder and take her friend’s place
• A writer with chronic pain who has to field critical comments from strangers over handicapped parking and unsympathetic friends
• A woman whose long ago ex-boyfriend and current friend insists on describing her as his ex to his new lady friends
• A writer who is just so damned good at helping others that she’s become the go-to source of advice for far too many friends

In this episode Malcolm and Kurt wrestle with a wide range of issues, including:

• How — and if — a dad should intervene with his son who appears to be developing a sexual attraction for Pokemon
• What to do when you get fired after calling the police on your boss for stealing your car
• How to extricate oneself from an ex-boyfriend’s mom who won’t stop calling and making uncomfortable demands
• Whether there’s any way to introduce multiple polyamory partners to one’s extended family without awkwardness
• How to handle a boss who puts masking tape over the lips of employees who offer up “bad ideas” during staff meetings

In this episode Malcolm and Kurt do their best to unpack letters to Ann Landers, Carolyn Hax, Dear Prudence and more, offering our pointed critiques of the following:

• “A Hairy Situation in the East” who doesn’t know how to communicate to his loving girlfriend that he’s freaked out that she doesn’t shave her legs or armpits“
• Halloween for the 99 Percent” who asks Prudence’s advice for discouraging low-income trick-or-treaters from invading their posh neighborhood on Halloween
• An ungrateful girlfriend who wants to know if Carolyn Hax thinks she’s being petty by complaining about her boyfriend’s self-serving birthday and Christmas gifts 

And so much more!

In this episode Malcolm and Kurt tackle letters to advice columnists from individuals facing a host of tough situations, including:

• A woman who caught her 40-year-old boyfriend making out with a 16-year-old girl attending her daughter's birthday party
• A new mom who pumps at work but recently discovered her expressed milk is being pilfered from the break room refrigerator
• A mom worried about her 24-year-old virgin son
• Dealing with a husband whose Mothers Day gift is ruining their home

... and much more!

In this episode Malcolm and Kurt unpack letters to advice columnists covering a range of topics, including:

• A woman whose boyfriend of two years insists on maintaining a relationship with his ex/housemate
• A young man whose yearning for a lesbian friend has finally turned to romance but should they buy a house together?
• What the proper etiquette is for greeting the host of a party immediately after performing an impromptu act of oral pleasure
• Is it OK to feel put-upon after paying for the care and feeding of a friend's teen kids for two weeks if one of the kids steals cars and makes terrorist threats?

... and much more!

Today Malcolm and Kurt do our best to unpack letters to Dear Abby, Dear Prudence and Miss Manners, doling out our critiques to:

- “Yearns To Be a Mom” a “former model” who’s 31 and desperate to get that finger ringed and start pumping out the rugrats, but just can’t find any takers

- A “Dear Prudence” letter writer whose friend has begun communicating with a “dragon spirit guide” she speaks with every day

- A polyamorous “Gentle Reader” who wants Miss Manners’ expert advice on how to discourage her husband from getting too hot and heavy with the female member of the couple they “swing” with while out to dinner

... and much more!

Today Malcolm and Kurt hilariously tackle letters to Dear Abby, Ask Amy and Miss Manners, sharing pointed thoughts on advice to:

• "Right or Wrong in Virginia," who is adamant about not going on double-dates with her husband's two-timing friend "Al.”
• "Finally Free," who wants to know if she was right to break things off the way she did with the married man who wasn't being honest with her
• A "Gentle Reader" who asked Miss Manners whether her "casual loungewear" was appropriate for brief trips into the yard to feed birds and move garbage bins
• "High and Dry" who says he's not sure how to tell his ex-wife he can't afford the expensive bar bill for their daughter's quinceañera party