Quick Counsel

Message from Bret Legg on August 23, 2021

Today, we are continuing our series called "The List." Which refers to a list of ways you can lose your marriage. It’s based on information gleaned from over 20 years of counseling records and over 2 years of watching some marriages fail.

And today’s episode deals with something we’ve all heard before, but still have problems with...COMMUNICATION. If you want to risk losing your marriage, then communicate poorly...or not at all.

Communication issues are so common in a marriage they border on cliché. And that’s ironic, considering we spend the first part of our life learning to communicate. But somewhere along the line, we begin to let all of that slide as if we’ve got it down.

In this episode you’ll find out why good communication is so important, why we tend to let it slide, and what we can do about it.

We are continuing in our series called “The List.” The list refers to a list of ways you can lose your marriage and is based on information gleaned from over 20

years of counseling records and watching marriages fail. Today, we’re going to look at another way to lose your marriage and that is to be parental with your spouse. It’s a fact of life that spouses will occasionally tell one another what to do. When done kindly and respectfully, there’s usually no problem. But it becomes a threat to a marriage when one spouse is continually

coming across as parental. In this episode, we’ll look at the signs that you’re being parental, as well as how

this happens and what you can do about it.

We are continuing in a series called “The List.” The list refers to a list of ways you can lose your marriage and is based on information gleaned from over 20 years of counseling records and marriage failures.

If you’ve been married for any length of time, there probably have been times when you wondered why you spouse has stopped showing you appreciation like they use to. Appreciation is the grateful and thankful recognition of a person and their efforts. It’s putting action to your gratitude and making your thankfulness visible and tangible.

Find out why appreciation is so important, why we stop showing it, and what we can do about it.

Today, we are continuing in our series called “The List.” The list refers to a list of ways you can lose your marriage and is based on information gleaned from over 20 years of counseling records and 20 years of marriages I’ve seen fail.

Has there ever been a time when your spouse was wanting you to change in some way and you thought, “This is just the way I am. You knew this when you married me.”?

There is no doubt that spouses can have different personalities, and personality differences can even benefit a marriage. The question is…does your inherent personality relieve you of a responsibility to change? And if not, what can you do to responsibly love your spouse and still be you? Find out in this episode of Quick Counsel as we look at another item on The List.

We are currently in a series called "The List." The List refers to a list of ways you can lose your marriage and is based on information gleaned from over 20 years of counseling records.

Past trauma is like a land mine. It’s often hidden, below the surface. But later it can blow up in you life hurting you and your relationships. In this episode, we’ll look at what is trauma, the effects of trauma on an individual, how it can hurt a marriage, and what you can do about it.

Some time ago, I spent a few days thinning out over 20 years of counseling files. As I went through each individual file, I could see faces and remember issues.

I was struck by how many married couples I had worked with. I celebrated those couples who had turned things around and went on to have great marriages. But I also grieved over those marriages that ended in divorce.

I was so burdened those who divorced that I began to jot down the issues that fueled those divorces. What I discovered was, despite the uniqueness of each couple, the issues that led to their divorces were quite common.  And with the exception of three or four big things,  most of the issues were smaller, more normal things that were left unattended for too long.

So, I compiled my notes into a list I called, "Ways to Lose Your Marriage" or just "The List" for short. And in the weeks to come, I’m going to be sharing this list with you. Each week, in no particular order, we will cover one way to lose your marriage.

Sometime ago, I spent a few days thinning out over 20 years of counseling files. As I went through each individual file, I could see faces and remember issues.

I was struck by how many married couples I had worked with. I celebrated those couples who had turned things around and went on to have great marriages. But I also grieved over those marriages that ended in divorce.

I was so burdened those who divorced that I began to jot down the issues that fueled those divorces. What I discovered was, despite the uniqueness of each couple, the issues that led to their divorces were quite common.  And with the exception of three or four big things,  most of the issues were smaller, more normal things that were left unattended for too long.

So, I compiled my notes into a list I called, "Ways to Lose Your Marriage" or just "The List" for short. And in the weeks to come, I’m going to be sharing this list with you. Each week, in no particular order, we will cover one way to lose your marriage.

Message from Bret Legg on June 28, 2021

If you’re feeling overwhelmed today, you’re not alone. The Mental Health Foundation, in the UK, did a study in 2018 and found that 74% of people had felt so stressed that they had been overwhelmed or unable to cope. AND THIS STUDY WAS PRE-PANDEMIC!

In this episode of Quick Counsel, we’ll share 3 simple steps that will help you overcome when you’re overwhelmed. And you may be surprised where we found the steps!