Quit Dieting for Good

Since it's Valentine's day tomorrow, I thought it would be fun to talk about the most important kind of love – loving yourself! You are the most important person in your life that needs to be loved. When you love yourself, you have more capacity to truly love others, and to spread that love into the world. All too often, we forget how to practice self-love, or we think that loving ourselves isn't important. (Or worse - that self-love is a bad thing!)

I'm here to remind you: it's most definitely not selfish! I probably need to do a whole episode on that, because so many women feel selfish taking care of themselves first! In reality, it's selfless and smart, because it's going to help everyone in your life.

Self-Care vs. Self-Love

You might be confused about the difference between self-love and self-care so let's talk about it.

Self-care is an act of self-love – so self-love is all encompassing.

Think about your child – you take care of them by feeding them, bathing them, helping them with their homework which is also a way to show them you love them. But you also love them by talking kindly to them, smiling at them, hugging them, giving them gifts, doing nice things for them, encouraging them when they're down, and the list goes on.

Today, I'm going to give you 6 things to focus on while learning how to practice self-love.

First, I want you to start practicing noticing what you do love.

If you don't currently love yourself, it's easy to be in a state where you don't really love much about your life. So, I find it a bit easier to notice what you do love, and get yourself in a more positive mindset before you dive into some of deeper practices surrounding self-love.

This can look like noticing what you love about different people in your life. It can be noticing what physical things you love that you surround yourself with in your home and office. You can start noticing what you love about the different activities you do in your day.

Once you start noticing what you love, take the time to appreciate what you do have. This is a start of a gratitude practice, and the more you can be grateful for what you have, the more you are going to enjoy your life. So start with the awareness and appreciation of the lovely aspects of your current life to get you in the more positive, loving state of mind. And that is the first step towards being able to practice self-love.

Second, I want you to figure out how you love to be loved (and start practicing self-love).

Have you heard about the five love languages? Do you know your top two love languages? I learned mine about two years ago and it's been a game-changer for me in the relationship with myself and others.

In the book, it separates the love languages into five categories: acts of service, gifts, quality time, physical touch, and words of affirmation.

You can take the test over at 5lovelanguages.com. (But really, you don't even have to take the test – you can just start thinking about and noticing what others do that make you feel loved.)

Try taking out the trash for yourself, or telling yourself how great of a job you did on your work project. You could give yourself a beautiful bouquet of flowers too. Try making a long list of things that make you feel loved and appreciated. Then notice the commonalities!

For me, my top two love languages are quality time and acts of service. If my husband does the dishes without me asking, I feel loved. If we have a good conversation while making dinner, I feel loved.

Once you know how you love to be loved, start practicing those ways to love yourself!

It's no wonder how I feel so recharged and more like myself when I have some good quality alone time with myself. Journaling, taking myself to a meal, or just going on a nice walk.

And for acts of service - I prepare beautiful and delicious meals for myself. I also make regular health appointments for myself, I give myself a nice face mask, or get dressed up in a way that makes me feel my best. All of these small things are ways I can practice self-love.

If yours is words of affirmation – you need to be telling yourself "good job" and "you are strong" and "I am worth it".

For gifts – that could be consistently buying yourself things that bring you so much joy. I just bought myself a subscription to a magazine to feel like I get a little gift in the mail each month.

For physical touch – that could be spending extra time on your skincare routine, using some really nice lotion to rub into your body, give yourself a hug when you are having a bad day, do a self-massage your hands and feet.

Figure out how to practice self-love in a way that feeds your soul. Also, share this info with your loved ones so they can know how to best love you. Ask them how they want to be loved as well, so you can love them how they want to be loved.

Third, quiet the inner mean voice in a loving way.

That inner mean voice gets nasty sometimes. Telling you things like "You have no willpower – why did you eat that?" or "You aren't strong enough to do this" or "If you only lost 20x, you would look way better "Yikes, she can be ugly!

But you know how when people and children act out, they are usually just wanted to feel seen and heard? Often there is something else going on that's making them act in such a way.

As you maybe know from watching movies and TV shows where kids act out in school – they just need more attention and love.

So tell your inner mean voice you hear her and see her and everything is going to be ok. Tell her how it's going to be ok, and why she is actually wrong about her negative feedback.

So if she says, "If you could just lose the weight, you'd finally look good.", you can remind her, "I'm so sorry you feel that way. But the truth is that you look great at any size, and the only thing that matters is your attitude. So let's work on being more loving and taking care of yourself, and that will make all the difference."

Give her some love and guidance on how you are going to move on from here, just like she is a young girl that needs a big hug.

Fourth, make sure your mindset it in the right place while you take care of yourself.

Taking care of yourself is a big part of loving yourself.

And going to the gym can be a great act of self-love! But if you are going to the gym to burn off the big lunch you had that you feel really guilty about – that's self-punishment. So anything you are doing to take care of yourself, make sure it's done because you want to take care of yourself.

Just like if you feel you need to lose weight: doing a diet to try to shrink yourself is not self-love.

Creating a new habit of eating salads at lunch because you have more energy in the afternoons: that is an act of self-love.

Make sure the mind is in the right place, my friends, or else the habit is not going to stick. And when you do reach your goal, it's not going to feel nearly as satisfying as you thought it would, because on the inside, you still hate yourself.

Fifth, keep moving forward, even when life gets in the way.

You are always going to hit roadblocks or have setbacks. It is just a partof life. But if you make it mean something bigger than it has to and get stuck in the "why me" phase, you are going to stay stuck and self-sabotage yourself.

For example, your coffee was made wrong at the coffee shop. The train got stuck. Your child threw a tantrum. You could tell yourself "This is going to be a horrible day!" and continue to see every negative thing. Or you can realize these things happen, and take a few minutes to do something to reset. Maybe a meditation or a nice chat with a friend. Then keep moving on.

There will be setbacks. You can always take a quick rest if you need it. But then keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Lastly – number 6 – you have to learn to accept the things you do not love.

Acceptance is a hard one, but it's an important piece in loving yourself. (So ironic that the best way to practice self-love is to accept what you might not really love!)

You aren't going to LOVE every single part of yourself. The more you can accept it and embody all the different things that make you, you – the better your life will be.

Something simple you can do is say it out loud. A nice phrase that I learned from the emotional freedom technique is:

Even though I have bigger arms than I want, I fully and completely love and accept myself.

Although I'm not as outgoing as I'd like, I fully and completely love and accept myself.

Even though I don't make as much money as I'd like, I fully and completely love and accept myself.

Just like people you love in your life. You probably don't love every single little thing about them. But you fully and completely love and accept them anyways.

I talked about this in an email recently and called out my husband. He most likely would never have read the email, except a mutual friend told him about it! It was pretty funny.

He always takes off his socks when he puts a blanket on, like when he's on the couch. So socks are strewn about the house quite often! So no, I don't love that he leaves he socks strewn about the house. But does that make a difference in how much love him? Nope, not at all.

On the flip side, he has to deal with my multiple tea mugs I leave strewn about the house. So I guess it's kinda even. And he loves me anyways too.

Practicing Self-Love is Healing

Bringing awareness to those things you may never love is a healing moment. You can take a minute to acknowledge that you may never love this piece about yourself. However, you are consciously going to accept and practice self-love anyways.

Ok, friends! Now it's time to go love yourself (and others) tomorrow! It's going to be weird having a Valentines day in the states for the first time in 7 years! As a holiday, it wasn't really celebrated in Switzerland. But I'm looking forward to it. It's fun to have these holidays feel new and exciting again.

I hope you have an amazing holiday for those that celebrate, and a lovely week. I'll be back next week with an amazing guest!

I was so excited to talk with Emily this week! Her message about being enough is so powerful, and she really opened up about her own struggles in this area during our interview. We also talk about what it means to listen to your body, and how to become more aware of what our bodies are telling us. And if you only take away one thing from this episode, let it be this: You are enough.

Emily is a health coach who currently lives in Brooklyn, New York. Her goal is to empower her clients to live their lives in a way that feels really good for them. This means that she often helps with a bit of business coaching as well (many of her clients are aspiring entrepreneurs). They cover both emotional & practical elements of living a life that makes sense for you.

Energy is Real

Emily shares that she strongly believes that energy (and the vibrations you put out into the world) are real. As she works with others who want to give back via service-based businesses (and as she desires to serve others herself), she's seen again and again that you need to be taking care of yourself if you want to show up for others.

I've experienced this in my own life! My worst business-related launch occurred when I honestly wasn't really practicing the kind of self-care that I teach others. As Emily shares, the vibration of honoring your own needs can absolutely be felt.

There is so much "noise" in the world about who are supposed to be, and what we are supposed to be doing. When we're trying to operate from a place of chasing after perfection, our energy reflects that. Emily shares that self-acceptance, and a belief that "this too shall pass", help her feel connected to herself. This connection is what allows her to continue operating from a place of self-compassion and self-care.

Living from such an amazing energy has a huge impact on how she's able to show up for both herself and those she cares about!

A Winding Path

Emily went to business school, then studied to be a CPA. She wasn't ever super excited about that career, but it felt safe and that made it seem like a good decision. A few years in, however, she started to feel an "itch" for change.

At the same time, she was exploring her own health and wellness. Digestive issues that had started in college had caused her to dive into nutrition and holistic wellness in her own life. She realized that when she had a chance to share about her food choices and yoga practice, she lit up.

While continuing her corporate career, she started researching alternative options. Eventually she came across the Institute for Integrative Nutrition. It was here that she learned about health coaching, and she knew she wanted to pursue it. She completed the program, and left her corporate job. She

Although she still identifies as a health coach, Emily is playing with the title of "empowerment coach". She's come to realize that health is not just about the food, or just about the yoga. Those things in and of themselves are not "health". Pursuing true health is really about the bigger picture, and about being empowered in your own life.

Part of that journey?

Struggling with not being "enough". She feels that this has gone hand in hand with the pressure of being perfect.

Perfection Seeking is Not Empowering

From a young age, Emily can see how the influence of striving to be perfect has impacted her life. Whether she was trying to get straight A's, or was eating the perfect foods, she's felt the pressure to be the "best". And that often means reaching perfection, which is an elusive place to ever find yourself. (And an impossible place to stay for any length of time.)

Having recognized this tendency within herself, she's done lots of internal work around self-care, as well as in loving and accepting herself as she is.

And yet, she recently realized that she was slipping into perfection seeking habits that were leaving her feeling anything but empowered.

After experiencing a flare up with her digestive symptoms, Emily started to pursue a few treatment modalities. At first they were helpful and positive, but she realized that eventually the journey had segued into something stressful. She was feeling a lot of pressure to "fix" herself and her gut. She noticed her eating was becoming more restrictive, and knew that she was pushing herself to "heal" her body. It wasn't about wellness; it was about perfection.

She also recognized that this pressure was leading her into feeling that she was not enough.

Showing Up For Yourself

She chose to take a step back, and in doing so realized that she wasn't showing up for herself the way she wanted to.

Once she recognized this, she chose to shift into a reality in which "perfectly healed" didn't need to exist.

Instead, she embraced the idea that her digestive issue might just be something that she needed to be aware of and take care of throughout her life. There was nothing she needed to change, and there was freedom to be herself, regardless of struggles.

I loved that she shared this, because I see so many clients who have put weight on this same sort of pedestal! They think that if only the scale will say a certain number, THEN they will be enough. And until then....they experience so much stress, pressure, and harmful perfectionistic tendencies.

When we choose to release the idea that we are responsible for reaching perfection, and instead allow ourselves to just be as we are....

Powerful healing has the chance to occur!

This principle is one of the things I love about intuitive eating: there is no "right" or "wrong". There is just information that can guide us towards what feels best for us.

And the reality always is: You are enough!

Listen to Your Body

First of all...

What does it even MEAN to listen to your body?

Emily shares that, as a former accountant, she definitely brings practicality into the "woo" of manifesting, listening to your body, or tapping into less tangible areas of health.

Some tools that she really enjoys: meditation, deep breathing, yoga, journaling, tarot cards, and even just putting her hands on her own body and asking how she really is. These have been transformative, and have allowed her to learn to listen to her own body.

For example, she shares that just sitting with herself and taking some breaths in the morning feels really good for her. After a few breaths, she asks, "What do I need right now?" or even just "Where am I at today?"

It's not unusual for us to be so busy that we don't even ask those simple questions of ourselves very often!

She also shares that she sees tarot cards as a way of connecting with her own intuition. Rather than trying to predict the future, she uses the cards to connect to the present. We've both found that sometimes more comes out than you'd have ever guessed was inside!

Reclaim Your Power: You Are Enough

When you diet, you hand over your power.

You start to believe that some outside authority has to tell you what is good for you, and what is good for your body. And if that's the case...

You might start to think that your own thoughts or feelings about what would be good for you don't mean anything.

However, you can choose to reprogram your mindset and TRUST your body and yourself.

After years of treating yourself and your body as if they couldn't possibly "know" anything about what is good for you, it feels phenomenal to let go of all the rules and finally trust yourself.

And along the way, you might even come to truly understand this core truth: You Are Enough.

You can find Emily at www.emilynachazel.com.

Today's guest is Jenna Free, who is one of the two lovely ladies behind The Body Love Society! Listen in as we discuss thoughts on diet culture, intuitive eating when you want to lose weight, and how to accept your body!

Jenna is passionate about body love, and uses the terms "un-dieting" as she shares about her passion for self-love and self-acceptance on this wonderful episode. (Be sure to check out IG to learn more about The Body Love Society's free challenge too!)

Wellness Without Obsession

The Body Love Society works with women who are interested in intuitive eating and un-dieting. Usually, their clients have struggled with social messaging that tends to lead to obsessions around food, which includes eating, dieting, and body image. At The Body Love Society, they're passionate about living a life of wellness without obsession. Jenna also clarifies that intuitive eating and un-dieting are not code words for "just give up" or "quit caring". Choosing to eat intuitively is a way of honoring and caring for yourself, and is not about just throwing in the towel!

Jenna and her partner desire to live an abundant, vibrant, and energetic life....but without restricting or obsessing about it! They've found that women are often fearful about letting go of control of their food. This seems to be connected to the idea that we can achieve some sort of "ideal state" when focus on our weight. The reality is, however, that there is no connection between losing weight/controlling food intake and being abundant, energetic, and feeling great!

Dieting isn't saving you from food obsessions. It is CREATING your food obsession. And as you've probably experienced for yourself, dieting never "ends" with you feeling wonderful and being free to live your life. Instead, it constantly requires more, more, more. It's never ending, exhausting, and. completely unnecessary!

The BIG Question Everyone Has

"Is intuitive eating just eat whatever you want, whenever you want?"

Well....yes and no.

If you've had a dieting mindset for most of your life, you've internalized so many messages about what you can and can't eat, what foods are "good" and "bad", and how you can control your food intake. You've also gotten used to constantly restricting and binging. A lot of obsession and control are involved!

If you move from that dieting mindset straight into intuitive eating, sometimes you do start eating everything...but you miss the whole "listening to your body" part. Instead, you're in "rebellion mode". (That can be part of the process, but it's not where you'll stay!)

As you do the mindset work and recalibrate yourself, you begin to experience the freedom of eating anything you want as a part of listening to your body and its needs.

So YES -- once you've done the mindset work, intuitive eating does mean eating whatever you want. It's just that the way you understand that (and practice it) is significantly different once you get out of your "dieter's brain".

The next most common question is often: Is intuitive eating healthy?

Intense, Restrictive, Consuming

Jenna describes herself as the "cute chubby one" as a 16 year old. Looking back she can see just how cute she was...but at the time she decided she needed to get on a diet and start exercising. And if eating more veggies and moving more was where it stopped, it would have been fine! However, weight loss and dieting lends itself to a "never enough" mentality.

In her life, this led to food regimens and workout routines that became more intense, more restrictive, and more consuming. (Can you resonate?)

Jenna became all too familiar with the dieting lifestyle, and experienced falling off the wagon (and climbing back on) over and over again. She found that her world was her body, and she was consumed with thoughts about food and eating. During this time she would have "cheat days" and binge on huge amounts of food, then not eat anything for the rest of the week.

As an intuitive eater, she's been able to move towards mindfulness, creativity, and awareness of the present moment instead. Rather than obsessing about food consumption and rule following, she is able to release all that in favor of practices that actually make her feel good!

Reaching a Place of Peace

While trying on her bathing suit years ago, Jenna realized that her preoccupation was with the 5 pounds she needed to lose so that everything would be "perfect". Rather than focusing on how fun her upcoming vacation would be, she was devising ways to lose weight. It was an "aha" moment to recognize that every moment seemed to be marked with what she needed to fix or change before she could fully enjoy her life.

After a few of these "aha" moments in a row, she decided that her body looking a certain way wasn't going to "fix" her life in the ways she kept thinking it would. As she journeyed through this process towards becoming and intuitive eater and un-dieting once and for all, she realized that she had suffered through the dieting lifestyle for nothing!

Dieting is like holding on to a ledge SO tightly, with extreme fear about falling or losing control. And then when you finally let go...

the ground is 3 feet away.

All that fear, control, and obsessing are unnecessary.

When you're engaged in the dieting mindset, what you're searching for (weight loss) isn't the answer you need. What you truly desire is usually something like: worthiness, love, acceptance, energy, wellness, confidence, and more. And you can have ALL of those things without having to diet or be a certain size.

Weight Gain Fears

Sharing about intuitive eating and un-dieting isn't as simple as showing before and after pictures that show weight loss! After all, that's not the point of this lifestyle. So what attracts people to it, and what fears threaten to hold them back?

Well, many women express lots of fears about possibly gaining weight if they give intuitive eating a try.

Jenna shares that The Body Love Society approach is to remove the hyper-focused attention on weight. After all, many women have lived in that weight-based mindset for 10, 15, 25 years. Years! So if your biggest concern is weight gain, the first question for you to consider is...

What has your obsession with weight given you so far?

When you can recognize that it hasn't provided anything desirable so far, you're free to choose somewhere else to focus your time and energy. And remember: You're not just giving something up. You're gaining something too!

With intuitive eating, your body may lose weight, gain weight, or stay the same. However, that is the LEAST interesting part of this journey. The newfound sense of freedom (and the dieting baggage you leave behind) is where the fun is!

It can be scary to STOP focusing on something you've obsessed over for years...

but it feels SO good once you finally let go.

Consciously Make the Choice

At some point, you can decide to change your mindset and refocus your life. Every single day you can shift your thoughts from control, restriction, fear, and obsession. Instead, you can choose to embrace freedom, self-love, courage, and acceptance of your body exactly as it is.

Just a reminder - this is not about giving up on taking care of yourself.

When intuitive eating, you still get to think about feeling good, and you're still taking care of yourself. You're just doing it from a place of self-care and compassionate listening, rather than pursuing weight loss as the magic cure.

When you stop dieting, you might experience changes in your body. That's to be expected! Coming off of years worth of dieting is going to involve some shifting and recalibration. That's normal, and nothing to stress over! Let your body find its groove, and prioritize balance and self-care. Expect ups and down, and learn to listen to your body's needs through the process.

Would you say that investing in your dream life comes easily to you? Today you'll hear from Emily King, a wealth and abundance coach who teaches women (including me!) how to have the right money mindsets. Something I've noticed about the mindset work I've done with Emily is that it really applies across a wide spectrum. Replace "money" with food, overeating, or any other struggle and you can really do the same sort of work.

Listen in for tangible tips on how to get rid of limiting beliefs and chase your dreams. We'll also talk about finally going after the feeling that you want (rather than a number on the scale or in the bank).

Quick note: I have a few 1-1 on intuitive eating coaching spots open right now! If you don't think a group program is ideal for you, or you're really craving that personalized attention, this might be the perfect fit! You can apply at: www.caitlinball.com/apply.

Emily's Money & Manifestation Journey

Emily shares that her passion for her work seems to come from a lifelong love of entrepreneurship. When she was a kid, she remembers being at a family gathering where a family member mentioned loving her hair. She was about 6 years old, and immediately offered to SELL him a piece for $1. (She then went around to everyone else, offering them the same deal.) From day one she's been an entrepreneur! Even then money fascinated her, and as she grew up she found she valued its ability to give you experiences that weren't available to everyone.

After completing the traditional college path that she though would lead into a career, she graduated with tens of thousands of dollars in debt and no job. At a complete low point, she moved home and found herself struggling. Around this time she also happened to come across a low-cost coaching program, where she enrolled and learned about the law of attraction, vision boards, and manifestation. In short order she paid off her debt and manifested her dream home, which started her down the path to her current career.

Interestingly, when she later asked her mom and sister what they thought she would grow up to be, they both shared they didn't know. However, they expected she would make a lot of money! As she moved into the coaching space, realizing that we can identify HOW we feel about money, and then actually take action to shift that feeling and create a new one, was intriguing to Emily. This process also began to open her eyes to the blocks we all encounter along the way.

Money Blocks & Limiting Beliefs

Just like food blocks, we can have money blocks!

Emily shares that beliefs start as decisions we made at some point in our lives. Whether we make these decisions as toddlers, teens, or some other point, decisions are being made all the time! Often, this is something we do unconsciously, which means it can be hard to even know that we've done it. Once we've made a decision, however, it becomes a filter that we are constantly looking through.

Are you thinking that your beliefs are real and true because you have evidence to back them up? Well, the "evidence" for our beliefs comes from the filters that we are looking through. We can create a self-fulfilling cycle in which we are constantly affirming our own beliefs. The good news is, we can CHANGE our filters and get new beliefs that will better serve us. The key? Awareness!

(Listen to the full episode for a great mini-exercise on filters!)

Start playing with your limiting beliefs, and try asking yourself: Is this 100% true and factual? Most of the time, it's not! This means you can try some "imagine if" scenarios and start to break free!

Imagine if....

...carbs aren't evil.

...your weight doesn't define you.

...you can have a lot of money and not be evil.

...you don't have to just "get by" your whole life.

The imagination space is a great starting point for examining your beliefs in a non-threatening way. In no time, you'll start to more easily recognize old beliefs and ideas that might not actually be true. (Side note: sometimes we do amazing work...and then the old issues come back around! That's okay, it's normal. Don't give up!)

Keep Doing the Work

It's okay to start small! You may be completely broke, or have a lot of body image issues, or some other struggle that plagues you. What is one SMALL way you can make a bit of progress towards breaking free from your old ideas around this problem?

Does it feel like a big stretch to say: I feel beautiful?

Start with something small. Maybe, "I feel beautiful in this dress." or "I really love my eyelashes today."

Leave judgement out of this process, and be okay with taking two steps forward and one step back! Another great tip from Emily is to honor your feelings.

Whether they seem bad, good, or neutral, try honoring them. What if you allow yourself just to feel what you feel and not get sucked into a downward spiral? You don't need to feel guilty or ashamed about anything you feel. In fact, truly feeling your feelings sets you up to able to actually release them and move forward.

Finding What You Truly Want

Sometimes we think we want one thing (like losing 20 pounds), when in reality what we want is something different (like feeling confident in our bodies). It's important to tap into your actual desire, and to think about what you want to FEEL. Often, the tangible thing we are focusing on isn't going to create the feeling we're actually chasing.

For example, if you don't love and respect yourself enough to feel confident in your body today, waking up 20 pounds smaller isn't going to change that.

So what happens if you name how you want to FEEL, rather than what you think you want?

For example, wanting money might be about feeling free, having choices, being generous, or something else. Those feelings that you want to feel "there" (free, generous, etc) need to be something you're working on feeling "here".

Emily remembers sitting in her living room and looking at $100,000 in her bank account (what she thought she wanted), and feeling intense stress and fear. In that moment, she recognized that having what she wanted hadn't created what she had expected to feel. Now, she works with clients on actually creating their desired feelings as they work towards their larger goals.

Pick something you want to feel, and work on feeling it today.

Want more freedom? How can you create a sense of freedom in your life today? It might feel awkward in the beginning, but don't worry about it! Feel awkward if you need to, but understand that you are literally breaking a pattern that's been in your life a long time. Shifting into something new is big work! You're doing a great job; just keep on showing up.

Follow the Joy

Do things that you love to get into the energy you want to be in. The goal here is to move towards a desired feeling, rather than just the "thing" itself (like weight loss, money, etc). After all, the thing you think you need or want may not even be the best thing for you.

One way to approach this is to use the "thing" as a symbol for the energy and feeling you're moving towards. That way, you have a specific goal, but you're also remaining open to receiving something even better than the original thing you thought you wanted.

You know when you look back on your life and recognize that you are WAY better off where you are now....even if it isn't something you would have never imagined or expected?

Same principal here! Be willing to attach to the feeling you most desire, but also be wiling to detach from a highly specific outcome.

Investing in Your Dream Life

Sometimes we think that if we think about or desire something long enough, that it's going to happen. It does NOT work that way!

"Mindset without action is bullsh*t." If you're talking the talk but not walking the walk, then sit down. You are not "manifesting", and no amount of vision board making or journaling is going to make up for your lack of action!

Emily shares that her coaching business had a really slow take off. In 6 months she had sold approximately ONE coaching session (for $97). Even going to Tony Robbin's seminar and coming home completely fired up didn't change anything. Nothing was happening.

So she sat down with herself and created an ultimatum. If she did not sign a new client by the end of the month, she would close her business. Her heart desperately did NOT want to shut down, but she knew that something had to change if she was going to ever achieve success.

Shortly after this meeting with herself, she hired a coach and SHOWED UP. In each consequent month for the following three months, she made $5,000. At the end of that? She did her first launch for over $20,000. What she boils her success down to? Showing up.

She advises others to make the decisions that needs to be made, and to trust that the rest will come together. Take the leap, stretch yourself, and get uncomfortable. That is what you need to do if you want to create lasting change! Don't be afraid of investing in your dream life.

What Bad Could Come From Doing This?

Exploring that question can help you get to the root of why you may not be succeeding. Emily's answers to that question showed her that she was afraid of what success might mean. Her responses included things like:

What if...

...signing on a bunch of clients is really stressful?

...I mess up my taxes?

...there is no longer time for my friends and family?

...someone sues me?

By answering those questions, she was able to recognize that she was truly safe to step forward. She realized that there was no need to fear the unknown. With that, she knew it was her time to step into her strength and finally live out the fullness of her dreams.

When it comes to investing in your dream life, Emily reminds us that the universe absolutely is supporting us. We don't have to create "rules" around it, and we don't need to get overly attached to a specific outcome. Focus on how you want to feel, and start creating that for yourself today!

You can find Emily on IG @emilykingco or on her website, www.therichwoman.ca.

You can leave a review of the show by clicking HERE https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/quit-dieting-for-good/id1440034531, opening the show in Apple Podcasts, and then choosing the 5 stars!

Hopefully you enjoyed getting a sneak peak into my life last week, and learning how I intuitively eat and live. That episode might have also gotten you wondering what success looks like when you quit dieting.

Your Own Version of Success

Today, I want to go a little deeper into what it's like to eat and live intuitively. I also want to address what "success" could look like in YOUR life. Keep in mind that success looks so different for so many people. As you saw last week when we took a look into what my daily life is like, every day is unique. In your own practice there will be some similarities, but success might be totally different for you. Embrace it!

In dieting, "success" tends to be very quantifiable because numbers are attached to it. For example, you can determine success using categories like body measurements, how much you weigh, and your body fat percentage. Those tangible success markers can be motivating – but they can also be really detrimental to your health. Since you are so focused on a number, you often aren't realizing how great you DO feel in your body. You're also blind to some healthy habits you may have created, especially if the number aren't what you hoped for. It's easy to get down on yourself, start to feel like a failure, and eventually just get into a nasty spiral.

Rather than getting hung up on these external numbers, I love to focus on listening to my body, actively care for myself, and learn to love who I am.

So this conversation about success, or a look at results that will start happening when you eat intuitively and take care of yourself, has to come from a place of love. Agreed? Remember that not every single one of these things will happen to you, because you are an individual. However, I will list some common occurrences that have happened to me and my clients, each of which we would call a personal success.

Also, as you guys know, my Quit Dieting for Good group program is currently open for enrollment until January 22nd. This is most likely the only time I will run this program this year. Since I've turned it into a 6-month course, I want you to be supported for 6 whole months and feel so confident when you go out into the world on your own, and use all the tools that we've been practicing. If you want to know more about my Quit Dieting for Good program, I encourage you to check it out now before it closes at caitlinball.com/quitdieting.

The Powerful Six Module Program

My program, Quit Dieting for Good, has six modules. I thought I would break down the successes by module (keeping in mind that your own experience will be unique to you!).

Letting Go of Restrictions

The first module is learning how to let go of restrictions. (Just so you know, each of my modules has audio to listen to, videos to watch, journal prompts, worksheets, special guests, and a meditation. Plus, you get a new module weekly for the first 6 weeks, along with a group coaching call where you get to ask all your personal questions).

One of the very first things that happens to my clients when they start learning about intuitive eating is one of two things: they throw away a food they don't really like OR they stop eating something (even though it's really good) because they are full.

I've had a couple clients tell me about throwing away "just OK" cookies. While dieting they wouldn't have thrown them away because they didn't know when they would allow themselves cookies again. Because of this, they had to eat whatever it was they were "allowing" themselves in each moment. (And then often binging on anything in arm's reach!)

Food Availability is Freeing!

With intuitive eating, all food is always available. That means that if a cookie is not that good, it's not worth wasting time on. I had a giant bag of Hershey's kisses in my house recently, and I didn't touch them because I like other chocolate so much better. Therefore, the kisses simply aren't worth it. (Except when they are on a pretzel with an M&M or a peanut butter blossom cookie. Then I love them!) The point is, my clients and I can leave food that is just OK, since we know that what we really want is available to us.

The other part is stopping when you are full, even when something tastes really good. I did this just yesterday. I bought a brownie because I really had a hankering for one, and I noticed one when we walked past a bakery. It was so good, but it was huge!

Back when dieting, I would have eaten the whole thing! With the mindset of "I'll start dieting on Monday", I would know that soon, a brownie like this wouldn't be allowed. If that's the case, I better have my fill (and even eat more than is comfortable) right now!

As an intuitive eater, now I don't diet ever, Mondays or otherwise. Since that's the case, I stopped halfway through my delicious brownie once I felt full. I was thinking that the rest of this would taste so good tomorrow, and I knew I would savor it then. If I had had the whole thing right in that moment, I knew I was probably going to get a headache (because that's too much sugar at once for my body to handle).

What Success Looks Like

Those are two huge successes! As you start to eat more foods that you truly love, and that you know will satisfy you, you aren't overeating because of the "last-supper" effect of a diet. (AKA: Eat it all now before it's all gone tomorrow). No more "OK cookies" in the place of decadent brownies!

Another big success is just eating and enjoying food without guilt.

Once food loses it's labels and stigmas...it just becomes food again. And once you can enjoy food without guilt, it's easier to be fully satisfied. You'll often find that you can then stop obsessing about (and feeling crazy around) food. When we intuitively eat, we feel free!

I personally felt so free once I realized I didn't have to diet for the rest of my life (and my clients often feel the same). Even after just a few weeks of letting go of restrictions around food, there is an impact! This podcast would be 2 hours long if I talked about every potential success, but I hope these give you a really good idea of Module 1 successes!

The next module is Body Love.

Usually the first thing that happens in Module 2 is that clients start feeling so grateful for the things that their bodies do for them on a regular basis. Often these things occur without much effort on our part. For instance, sleeping, eating, digesting, walking – all those things are a gift!

Spending so much time and energy hating our bodies, which are actually really awesome, is wasted energy. Clients also get to the root of their body confidence issues in this module. They tend to realize that they can do everything they've held back doing – at any size or weight.

I have multiple clients that had started a business or side business, and through this process finally became proud to be the face of it. Others finally went swimming, or wore their swimsuit with confidence. Some purchase beautiful clothes for themselves that fit well and feel good (no more squeezing into too-small sizes or painful clothing!). Many find they can start dressing up for themselves rather than only for other people.

The third module is all about hunger and fullness.

I find that once my clients start practicing eating when they are truly hungry (but not too hungry), they get more satisfaction out of their meals. In addition, they are able to make choices that make their body and tastebuds feel satisfied. When they let themselves get too hungry, they choose foods for quick energy. Those choices don't always allow them to feel their best. Plus, if eating when too hungry, you feel like a bottomless pit! This means you'll likely end up eating more than you actually need.

Clients in this module also learn to listen to their body instead of the clock.

One of my clients hated breakfast...but she always was told she was supposed to eat it, so she did! When she finally listened, she realized her body didn't want to eat until late morning or lunchtime.

Other clients have figured out they like having snacks throughout the day, and other clients like to eat bigger meals without snacks. Regardless of preference, they all figure out how to listen to their bodies and learn when they need to eat based on their body!

Why would we eat the same when we are all different? My husband eats two big meals, and a snack at 12, 6, and 9pm. I eat at 7, 10, 12, 3, and 7, and that works much better for me.

My clients also share that they begin to eat more mindfully. They practice taking some time with their food instead of stuffing it down. In addition, they stop hiding while eating, which can be an unconscious habit. They truly get enjoyment and pleasure from the eating experience!

The fourth module covers emotional eating.

My clients learn about the common emotions that cause them to overeat.

They also start to associate different self-care activities with emotions rather than food. They can decipher when eating emotionally will be productive, and when it will make things worse (which is so important to recognize!). Knowing when it's a physical craving and when it's emotional is essential!

The fifth module addresses self-care.

I love this module! We cover movement that each individual can actually enjoy!

Dance, swimming, walking, or enjoyable hobbies are awesome. I've had clients start (or re-start) things like sewing, craft projects, reading, cooking, and even just attending more social events. We also step up our regular self-care routines, which might include journaling, meditation, and other kinds of movement.

Success in this module varies widely, but always involves more self-care, self-love, and movement that feels good for each individual. It's hard to go wrong with that!

The sixth module covers gentle nutrition & finding the right foods for your individual body.

My clients find out that eating too much of "this" food group or "that" food group doesn't work for their bodies. They are able to make changes because of respect for their body, not because anyone is telling them to do so.

My clients CHOOSE to eat a certain way. There choices are not based on "I can't eat that", or "I shouldn't eat this". All food becomes a choice that they are making for themselves. This is super empowering, and allows them to be more confident!

Intuitive eating is AMAZING. I see the impact it has each and every day, and I can tell you that it's about far more than food. Really, it's about respecting and honoring your needs. Success results in feeling empowered in your body and your choices, and being FREE to love yourself and your life.

This is your invitation to join me on the intuitive eating journey. Let's go! www.caitlinball.com/quitdieting.

Happy 2020! I hope everyone is off to a great start. Today's episode is a little bit different than usual. It's a quick look at a day in the life of an intuitive eater, and encompasses what it looks like to eat intuitively for a 3-day period in my own life.

The days I cover include one where I got up and headed to my co-working space, one where I worked from home, and then a weekend day that included family time and going out to eat.

Before we dive in, I want to remind you about the Food Freedom and Body Confidence Challenge. It might be the ONLY time I run the challenge this year, and it includes a LIVE workshop, Facebook community, and practical steps you can easily implement at home. Ready? Head over to www.caitlinball.com/challenge to sign up!

Day 1 - A Day In the Life: At the Office

This was Thursday, Jan 2, so right after celebrating New Years! Due to all the holiday festivities, we didn't have much in the fridge. However, I do like packing a lunch when I work from the office, so I knew I wanted to bring something with me. (Technically my intuitive eating journey for Thursday started Wednesday night, as I thought about what the next day would hold.)

When we got home from celebrating, I was feeling a little blah from the extra food and alcohol I had on New Years. My body was asking for veggies! I found some quinoa in the pantry, plus some leftover guacamole, a cucumber, and tuna. I was able to whip that together into an easy-to-pack lunch the night before, and I was ready to go!

Quick Tip:

Lots of times intuitive eating asks you to think about how you feel now, as well as how you might feel the next day.

I knew I was going to want veggies and food that would really fuel my brain and give me energy so I could be fully present at work. Knowing that gave me the motivation I needed to create a lunch that would fit the bill!

Packing the night before is wise, because my little guy gets up early! Often he'll watch a show as he wakes up, and I take advantage of that time to do a bit of journaling. I prefer journaling first thing in the morning (especially since the alternative to journaling seems to be immediately getting on my phone). I'd rather journal first, so I let go of the "mom guilt" I sometimes feel about him watching TV and take that time to start my day in a way that feels good. (He enjoys it too!)

Once we're done with that, we eat breakfast together. Since the pantry and fridge were running a little low, we had oats (about the only option left!), and then we threw in some frozen berries. I also had nuts and seeds on hand.

Quick Tip:

A huge part of my intuitive practice includes the habit of keeping foods around that will fuel me and my family. Things like frozen berries, nuts and seeds, and, of course, oats, are pretty easy to keep stocked. They can be converted into breakfasts, snacks, or add-ons to other meals, and they're tasty too!

On that particular Thursday, I had woken up feeling SO bloated. We had just spent four days with my family, which had included tons of eating out, and more alcohol than usual. I was feeling it! On days like that, I ask myself, "What do I need today?"

For me, the answer was to eat more veggies and home cooked meals. I could tell my system was feeling sluggish, and baked goods tend to exacerbate that feeling for me. Since I wasn't feeling quite as good as I wanted to feel, I decided to opt out of the baked sweets. Instead, I packed a bit of dark chocolate, which is one of my favorite snacks!

I also pulled a frozen family meal out of the freezer so it could thaw during the day. We had rice that I knew I could add to it later as well.

Since movement sounded nice, I decided to walk to BART (public transit). My husband could have dropped me off, but I felt like the 20 minute walk would feel good for my body, and be a nice start to the day. It wasn't a formal workout, but I didn't need to force that into being.

Quick Tip:

Intuitive movement is just as important as intuitive eating, and can be easy and enjoyable. As you're checking in with your body and thinking about you need, movement will naturally present itself as an option!

On my walk, I realized I really wanted a chai latte, so I got one. When I have writing to do (which I did), I really like having a nice drink to go with it.

By the time 10:30 hit, I had a chocolate craving, so I enjoyed somme chocolate. Often my chocolate cravings come in the morning, and I consume most of my chocolate between 10-1 ever day.

Quick Tip:

There's not a "wrong" time for chocolate (or any dessert), and you don't need to follow rules about when you're "allowed" to have a snack.

At 12:15 there was an exercise class at my co-working space that I really love. It's like a yoga/pilates fusion, and it's so fun. I had a client call scheduled for 1:00, so I knew I wasn't going to be able to the whole class. That's alright! I enjoyed doing 30 minutes of a class I enjoy, and I didn't feel bad about leaving early.

I ate lunch on my call, since I knew it was fine to do so. It definitely wasn't a drawn out (or exciting) affair where I was really in tune with my food. So glad I had packed my lunch the night before, though, because it made me feel good to eat a homemade lunch and fuel my body.

Once work was done, I made a little tea for the afternoon. I headed home, and once I was off BART I decided to walk back to the house. I truly love walking; it feels so good, and is just a nice way to move my body. At home, I cut up some apples and carrots for my husband, son, and I to snack on while the rest of dinner was cooking.

I knew I'd be shopping the next day, so no stress about not having many veggies with that dinner. Afterwards, I enjoyed a bit of chocolate, put my son to bed, and then did a bit of meditation. I know lots of people say you should meditate in the morning, but that's not what works for me, so that's not what I do.

Finally, I end the day with my gratitude journal (which has been such a great practice), and then read a bit of fiction. Reading something that is 100% just for fun is the perfect way to end the day.

I was in bed with the lights off before 10pm, which is usually my goal. (Early mornings and body that really needs a full 8 hours mean bedtime comes quickly for me!)

Day 2 - A Day in the Life: Working From Home

On work from homes days, I have a similar start to the day as office days. Cooper and I get up, and he usually watches a show while I journal. On this day...not so much. He wanted to play and cuddle, so we did that instead. I don't stress about missing a day of journaling, and I find it works best if I just go with the flow. As a mom, that's part of my personal self-care! Some days I can do the things, and other days it doesn't happen, and that's fine.

I was able to drink my morning warm water. I just let the water warm up, and use that as a way to rehydrate in the morning. I've tried lemon water in the past, but it wasn't my favorite. The warm water? It feels really good lately!

We had picked up a few basic groceries the other day, so we were able to make smoothie bowls for breakfast. We used bananas, and added granola to the top.

Quick Tip:

Back in my dieting days, I would have never added granola to a smoothie, because I made the green ones that were all about following my diet. Now that I eat smoothies because I LIKE them, I prefer to add a bit of crunch. We throw in some spinach too, and everyone wins!

Most days we head over to daycare after this. If I have classes or clients scheduled I sometimes drive him, but if my morning is open I prefer to walk. It takes about 20 minutes each way, and is a great 40 minutes of movement, which I really enjoy. Sometimes I call a friend I want to catch up with, which is always fun.

I did 15 minutes of yoga once I was back home. This often feels good, but since we had had a surprise wake up to a fire alarm going off in the middle of the night, it was extra nice to do something calming and help bring me out of that stress response mode that the alarm had triggered for me.

Definitely a nice way to start my day! After I showered, I started my work day. There were a few back to back calls coming up, and I knew I was already feeling a little hungry, so I grabbed a nut butter bar so I could eat quickly. The hunger was there, and I had a snack on hand that would keep me from getting hangry and ravenous!

Quick Tip:

When you're feeling super hungry, your body wants to be fed NOW, which often leads to eating whatever is in arm's reach. That doesn't always make your body feel super great, even though it technically takes away the hunger. As part of my intuitive eating journey, I've learned to pay close attention to hunger signals, and also keep food around that I can enjoy and get fueled by.

For lunch, I ate leftovers from the night before, which I wanted. Sometimes we crave leftovers because they are great (or because they are so easy), and that's awesome! You don't have to spend a lot of time planning or prepping to do intuitive eating.

Due to the poor night's sleep, I took a nap. Pushing through and forcing myself to do more work was an option, but I don't tend to produce my best results that way. One of the plus sides of working from home is that you CAN honor your body's needs in that way. Woohoo!

I woke up and had a bit of chocolate, because I really wanted it. Usually I have some sort of dessert every day. I don't question it, and I truly enjoy it.

Then I headed out for a full grocery run. Since one of my goals is to be more sustainable, I had fun using my reusable grocery bags and shopping from a store with bulk bins!

We had dinner at my in-laws, and it was so nice!

Quick Tip:

As an intuitive eater, I didn't have to stress about what they would be serving. I'm a busy mom, and this meal was made for me and required no prep! Definitely enjoyed that, and didn't have to stress about anything.

Came home and mediated, did my journaling, and ended things with my book once again.

Day 3 - A Day in the Life: Weekend Fun Times

Once a year my mom's friends meet for a brunch. As my mom has passed away, I'm invited every year. It's such a blessing to be able to attend this now that we're back from Switzerland.

This particular venue is known for it's Irish coffee, but I'm not a coffee fan. I usually get a peppermint Schnapps hot chocolate instead, but this time around I've been decreasing my milk consumption. I've realize that when I consume milk my body is not a fan. A little here or there works out for me, but a whole cup full wasn't going to feel great.

Instead, I got a mimosa. I'm not usually a big fan of drinking during the day, but I got it because I wanted to feel a part of the group. In one way I stood up for my own needs (not getting a drink I don't like) and in another I compromised a bit (ordering a drink during the day, even though I normally wouldn't).

Quick Tip:

Part of intuitive eating is learning when to take action for yourself and your needs, and when it might feel good to make a decision that's more about joining in or being a part of something. No guilt is necessary, and you can make decisions like this on a case-by-case basis. (There are no "rules" to break!)

Everyone else got egg's Benedict, but I don't do eggs. Instead, I got a sandwich. It was good, but it was also really big, so I didn't eat all of it.

Quick Tip:

In years past, if I was eating something heavy and filling and "off-diet", I would have eaten as much as possible because I would have known I was going to compensate for it later by restricting even more foods. That leads to overeating and later restricting, which is a rough cycle! When I know I don't have to "pay" for eating good food that I enjoy, I don't feel like I have to gorge while I have the chance.

I enjoyed the sandwich because it was really good, and I didn't feel guilty about a single bite. And when I was full, I didn't feel obligated to keep eating either.

During brunch, botox came up, and there was a lot of conversation about how many women are doing it. It seems crazy to me how accpeted it is! It's been normalized because diet culture and the beauty industry has shown that we are "supposed" to make an effort to look a certain way.

Quick Tip:

You don't need to follow those rules! Aging gracefully is beautiful, and you don't have to inject yourself with chemicals to conform to a certain standard. Ask yourself what YOU truly want, rather than just accepting what you've been conditioned to want.

Afterwards we did a bit of walking around, and even got to sample some great chocolate. Once I get home I took a quick nap, then enjoyed the afternoon with my son.

As dinner rolled around, I was planning to make pasta, but Cooper did not want that. We had tuna casserole in the fridge, which seemed easy and quick. However, I had to ask myself if I actually wanted that casserole for dinner.

Quick Tip:

Sometimes when we choose food just because it is available or easy, we end up feeling less than satisfied, which then leads us to keep eating so that we can get the satisfaction we desired. Rather than snack the rest of the night because I had chosen an easy dinner I didn't really want, I wanted to be sure that the casserole would satisfy me.

How? Well, I took a bite and really considered it. If I could tell it wasn't going to satisfy me, I would have let Cooper have that and still made the pasta I had planned on making. My sample bite was enough to let me know that I would enjoy the tuna, however!

Quick Tip:

It's just about checking in and being sure you actually want the food you're sitting down to eat.

After dinner Cooper and I each shared a piece of chocolate, then we headed to bed.

Over the rest of the weekend I did some meal prep and prepared freezer meals, opted out of yoga because I knew I was going to be on my feet a lot, and did a bit more grazing (due to the meal prepping) rather than full sit down meals. It felt good, and I had lots of fun!

A few big themes that characterized my days:

Checking in with myself a lot about what I want to eat.

Thinking about how I want to move my body every day.

Prioritizing mediation, journaling, gratitude, and self-care every day.

Join the Food Freedom and Body Confidence Challenge and learn what intuitive eating could look like for you!

Today's special guest has actually already been with us once! (You can check out Episode 21 here. We dug into all sorts of great information about stress and self-care). Sandra Mikhail has so much to share about why you don't need to start a new diet to kick off 2020. She specifically shares about the ketogenic diet, and why she often finds herself telling clients, "Don't go keto!"

If you've been considering Paleo, keto, calorie counting or some other trendy diet, this one is for you!

The Food Freedom and Body Confidence Challenge is starting January 12. We'll kick off with an intuitive eating workshop, then launch into a 4 day challenge where we actually get to practice each of the four steps of intuitive eating. (And there are prizes!) Head to www.caitlinball.com/challenge to join us!

As a clinical dietician, Sandra shares that she primarily works with gut health and sports nutrition. As a mom and business owner, she stays busy! In addition, her own diet struggles and personal health journey has had a huge impact on how she thinks about health and nutrition.

The Keto Diet

The ketogenic diet has been a huge trend in 2019. Essentially, this is a low carb, high protein, high fat diet. Whether you've tried it or not, you've likely heard of it!

Sandra shares that she first encountered keto over a decade ago. At that time it was being used as a therapeutic diet to potentially address epilepsy symptoms in children. In the last decade, it has transitioned into a phenom that many many people have tried (or are thinking about trying).

Keto is extremely low carb (your "carb allowance" is usually around 20-50 grams, or about a slice of bread). Carbohydrates are our bodies' main sources of energy, as carbs break down into sugar. Typically, they make up our first line of energy. Ketogenic diets attempt to disrupt that pattern by pushing your body to break down fat instead of carbs. Using fat as the first line of energy may sound like a great way to lose weight, but it's really not how our bodies were designed to work.

Most people's extreme initial weight loss when they first start keto is really just water weight. As more and more studies are being done, they're also starting to show that keto diets are not superior to other diets. In fact, you can achieve the same or similar results with a more moderate food plan. Other findings include that fact that muscle mass tends to decrease while on keto as well.

Even most keto advocates don't recommend going complete keto for more than 3-6 months, which means it's not a long-term, sustainable plan.

There has been some positive research indicating keto may have some positive impacts on some mental health disorders or conditions, or even some chronic diagnoses. However, it's important to note that this use of keto is not about weight loss (and these studies are in very early stages!).

The Misunderstood Nutrient

Carbs tend to pop up as "fear foods" quite often!

In fact, you don't even have to be in a dietary field to hear people talk about how they are "cutting carbs", going "carb free" or avoiding carbs. This is common language, and has become a bit of an obsession.

When working with patients experiencing eating disorders, Sandra has found that many of these clients have a lot of fear about carbs as well. She believes they've been demonized for their impact on weight for far too long!

When you think about it, many nutrient dense foods that are filled with nutrients, such as fruits, yogurt, legumes, and vegetables, are also filled with carbs! When you start cutting out carbs, you also tend to cut out many foods that you body loves. One example? Fiber, which is an important part of a healthy lifestyle and way of eating.

What happens when we don't get enough fiber? We tend to struggle with constipation and high cholesterol. These are side effects Sandra says she has seen quite a few times when taking on clients who have been following a ketogenic diet.

Long Term Sustainability

Don't do keto if you're hoping for a long-term, lifestyle based way of eating!

Many people find that the aversion to carbs they develop while dieting tends to stick around even when they come off the latest diet. This leads to continued cycles of restricting (often followed by binging and guilt), which can last for a life time. Certainly not an attitude you want to live with forever!

In addition, you'll want to consider other impacts of keto. For instance, because of its emphasis on fat and protein, ketogenic diets tend to place a great deal of emphasis on consuming meat and dairy. The environmental toll this takes shouldn't be ignored.

Not only is keto not personally sustainable, it doesn't seem globally sustainable either. If you want to eat sustainably for your health and for the environment, don't go keto.

Consider what your body actually needs, and what makes it feel good.

Weight Loss Isn't an End Goal

When people come to Sandra's practice for weight loss, she strives to understand what the number on the scale means to them.

She also asks, "What would decreasing that number actually change?"

Usually, it's much healthier to focus on the results you're seeking (more energy, lower cholesterol, better health) and put your energy into achieving them rather than losing weight.

If weight loss occurs in the course of pursuing those deeper goals, that's fine. If not, it doesn't really matter. When improving your health is the end goal, you'll be surprised at how little the numbers on the scale really mean.

Sandra finds that often, those using the BMI scale have a distorted sense of what they "should" weigh. In addition, often women have unrealistic ideas about what the number on the scale "should" be. These misunderstandings often lead to unhealthy ideas about the need to lose weight in the first place.

Rather than implement a diet, Sandra prefers to focus on what behaviors could be changed to bring a client to a more balanced stage. She also wants clients to understand that weight naturally fluctuates throughout our lives. Deciding that you want to weigh what you weighed 15 years ago may not be healthy or sustainable for your current stage in life.

By moving away from numbers, you can get more in tune with your actual body cues. How hungry are you before meals? After meals? What movement feels good? How much stress are you experiencing?

As people begin to have more energy, sleep better, or feel stronger, the topic of weight often begins to dissipate. They naturally being to feel more comfortable with the idea of listening to their bodies for indicators of health (rather than judging it by the number on the scale).

New Year Health Goals

Instead of setting a goal to lose weight (or any other health related goal), try asking this instead: What have I done for myself today?

By making an effort to put yourself first and practice self-care every single day, you can create incremental changes in your life. And isn't feeling good the best indicator of health?

Best of all? No dieting required!

You can find Sandra Mikhail at her site, www.nutrition-az.com.

The fresh new year is coming SO soon. This is such a fun part of the year. With a new year, we all have a clean slate and an exciting new future. Most of us are leaning forward in anticipation!

As I prepare to teach even more women about how to kick dieting to the curb and embrace intuitive eating, I'd love to take a chance to respond to the two biggest (and most common) questions I get asked.

Ready? Here they are:

"Is intuitive eating healthy?" and its companion question, "How can I eat whatever I want and still be healthy?"

Have you ever wondered these things?

If so, you're in good company! These are good questions, and it's worth taking the time to explore the answers. As I share more, I hope you're able to consider whether intuitive makes sense for your life and needs!

But FIRST...

Have you signed up for the Food Freedom and Body Confidence Challenge? It starts with a workshop that covers the 4 simple steps of intuitive eating, and then follows up with 4 easy, daily challenges that give you a chance to practice intuitive eating. (You'll find out just how fun and easy it is!)

It's free, it's fun, and you can sign up today at:

www.caitlinball.com/challenge

Back to the two big questions!

Before we can determine if intuitive eating is healthy, we have to define what "healthy" even is. And honestly -- true health is about your WHOLE being. It's not just vital signs, numbers on a scale, or your level of physical stamina. In fact, the World Health Organization shares that:

"Health is a state of complete physical, mental, and social wellbeing, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity."

Wow! Too often, when people talk about health they're only taking a limited amount of data into account. Ultimately they are often talking about (and promoting) some form of diet or exercise that will impact your physical body, but not much else. (Or worse...will have a negative impact on your emotional or social wellbeing.)

Intuitive eating, on the other hand, covers the WHOLE picture! Rather than just focusing on calories, workouts, or lists of food that you're "allowed" and "not allowed" to eat, intuitive eating considers your whole being. You learn about meeting your needs, what makes you feel good, and how you can best care for yourself.

My clients are often shocked but just how comprehensive intuitive eating work is!

So...is intuitive eating healthy?

According to the World Health Organizations definition, it IS! In fact, it's likely healthier than any diet or regimented plan you've attempted in the past.

The second question gets at the root of how intuitive eating can be healthy for you, since it literally means you can eat anything. So many people voice the concern that they'll only ever eat donuts or candy if they try to eat intuitively. After all, isn't that what we all really want?!

I go more in-depth on releasing restrictions around food in this episode (https://caitlinball.com/2019/09/intuitive-eating-101-letting-go-restrictions/), but I still want to touch on this here. Its a hot topic!

Here's the truth of the matter: You will NOT want chips and cookies all day, every day.

Yes, you might eat quite a few of them at first. But that part of the process is for your mental wellbeing. Giving yourself freedom physically helps you release the rules, stress, and tension you're mentally holding.

As you release stress around food (and being to eat the foods you've formally restricted), you'll eventually get to point where you recognize that those foods truly ARE allowed. And as you accept that, you're able to take those foods off their pedestal and simply accept them.

Again -- think of health as being physical, mental, AND social. Some steps you take in intuitive eating may emphasize one area (like mental health) first, but they come full circle and have a positive impact in other areas as well.

Another big positive mental impact of practicing intuitive eating? Improved body image!

If you're constantly berating your body, that is NOT healthy.

Think of criticizing, shaming, or otherwise critiquing the body of a child in your life. That would be awful, and the child would suffer. You're surely not doing that to a child, but you're often doing it to yourself.

And in the same way a child would suffer under that treatment, you do too! Your mental and emotional wellbeing is compromised, and that often comes through in the way you treat your physical body as well. You might overexercise, overeat, under-eat, or do other things that don't express love towards your body.

Intuitive eating allows you to begin treating your body with respect. Your body deserves to eat food that allows it to feel good, it deserves to have fun with movement, and to be dressed comfortably. Movement can feel good, and clothes can fit right when you practice eating intuitively!

And back to our big question of health: Learning to respect your body is healthy for your mind, body, AND physical self.

Intuitive eating also addresses your emotional wellbeing. If you tend to deal with stress or emotions by practicing emotional overeating, you're not helping your emotional or physical health. Although emotional eating is a coping mechanism, when taken too far it can take a negative toll on our wellbeing.

Learning to address your emotions without the use of food (or in a more productive way with food) is a powerful step towards living a more holistically healthy life! (I dig into this here: https://caitlinball.com/2019/03/episode-22-feel-your-feelings-instead-of-eating-them/.)

Another amazing tool that intuitive eating brings to the table is the chance to begin caring for yourself with love.

Self-care is a huge part of intuitive eating, and can encompass a whole variety of things. Journaling, reaching out to professionals who can help with your specific needs, and moving in ways that feel good all count. So does making time for yourself, practicing small acts of self-care, and more. As these things come together, they form one of the biggest pieces of the intuitive eating puzzle!

Many of my clients are surprised at how much self-care and self-love work takes place in intuitive eating.

Many of them return to old beloved hobbies, begin practicing new forms of movement, and otherwise reconnect with themselves from a place of love and care. This often has a ripple effect. They find they want to do things that make them feel good. Instead forcing themselves to go to the gym from a place of body hatred or anger, they find joy in choosing to perform some form of exercise that genuinely feels good.

They find themselves dressing in ways that make them feel wonderful. They start choosing food from a place of self-care, rather than stuffing emotions or "punishing" themselves or their bodies. Self-hatred or loathing will never create a strong foundation for true health. Intuitive eating addresses that, and helps you learn to make healthy decisions from a place of self-care and compassion.

Finally, intuitive eating helps you get back in touch with your own body's wants and needs.

You'll learn what foods feel good for you, and which foods you may want to eat less of. These choices don't come from a place of restriction or diet rules, but from a place of checking in with yourself. Your body knows, and it will let you know, if a certain food or menu item isn't going to make it feel that great. Maybe you'll decide to skip it all together, maybe you'll just have a bit, but you'll be able to do so from a place of self-love and self-care. That makes all the difference!

Now, I would say that when I was dieting, there were diets that helped me discover things about what my body likes or doesn't like. For example, years ago when I had done Whole 30, I learned that less processed foods and more vegetables made me feel really good.

When I started my intuitive eating journey, I was eventually able to use that knowledge to inform what made me feel good.

The difference? When I was dieting, I was following rules from a place of needing to make myself "better". As an intuitive eater, I was able to use self-care and self-love to determine what would make me feel my best. It's an important shift!

If you've been a dieter in the past, you can take what you've learned and utilize it! It's incredible how making food choices that are about self-love (rather than weight loss or physical appearance), feels completely different.

Most diets address only one element of health, and often even have a negative impact on other areas! In my opinion, intuitive eating is truly the healthiest way to eat and live. It positively touches ALL elements of your health, and it helps you approach your relationship to yourself (and eating!) from a place of love.

This interview was so fun! Claire Chewning is a registered dietitian, and she also helps women with intuitive eating. She has some great tips for intuitive eating over the holidays, how to handle comments from family and friends, and even some thoughts on the so-called "sugar addiction". Let's dive in!

Just a reminder - this month I'm donating 10% of December's profits to The Breasties, an amazing non-profit that is dedicated to supporting young women impacted by breast and reproductive cancers. This cause is near and dear to my heart, as my own mom passed away from breast cancer.

How did she start?

Claire shares that she knew very early on what she wanted to do. Her own family was very positively food-centered, and she attributes that to her own interest in pursuing a food-based career. Because of her personality, and her own desire to start a family one day, she ruled out being a chef pretty quickly. Instead, she elected to pursue a role as a dietician.

Her nutrition coursework, along with her desire to create a "perfect" meal plan and be a "perfect" eater, started to create a rules-based mindset. Food began to be either "good" or "bad". Claire realized that her dietician training was causing her to lose her own positive relationship with food. All the joy was seeping away! Around this time she discovered The Intuitive Eating Book. With the realization that a food relationship could be joyous, fun, and intuitive (just like the one she grew up with), she knew she needed to pursue intuitive eating as a career.

Intuitive Holiday Eating Hacks

1. Reframe Your Thinking

The decisions you make around the holidays really depend on who you are, how long you've been eating intuitively, and what your own goals are.

The holidays can be a great season to learn more about who you are and what you might want to work on next in your food relationship. Rather than focusing on food as a "temptation", or trying to increase your "will power"...what if you celebrated with joy and had fun? Reframe your thinking!

Rather than "Oh no, there will be so much food around", what about "Oh wow, there will be so much amazing food around. I might learn more about what area of my food journey I still want to work on". Feeling a lot of stress and anxiety about certain foods can be a sign that you aren't actually giving yourself full permission to eat intuitively.

2. Stop "Saving" Your Calories

When you try to "save" calories for a big meal, event, or party, you tend to go into them feeling super hungry. Which leads to overeating or binging...because you are hungry! Your body needs food, and making yourself ravenous before an event doesn't help at all!

When you ditch this mindset and give yourself permission to fuel your body throughout the day, you'll find you feel much better. Restricting and then binging doesn't help anyone, yourself included.

When you're in the presence of a large amount of food, you absolutely have permission to eat it. It's not going anywhere, and you can enjoy it. If you're nearing the end of an eating experience because you feel really full, why not pack a plate for later? Or bring some leftovers home? Rather than creating a feast or famine mentality, remind yourself that you can enjoy these foods at any time.

3. The Sugar Addiction Myth (No need for a cleanse!)

The holiday season tends to prompt a wave of "cleansing". People often insist their systems are overloaded with sugar, or that they have a "sugar addiction", and their go to system for "fixing" this problem is to do a cleanse.

Our bodies are equipped with a natural detoxification system (the liver and kidneys!). We don't need to hop on the detox bandwagon or purchase a cleanse in order to clean toxins or sugar from our system.

Actually, when it comes to sugar addictions, it's normal to feel like you *might* have one because of the messaging we're all inundated with daily. However, you aren't going to be addicted to something necessary for survival. Sugar breaks down to glucose in the body, which is the most readily available source of energy out there. Our bodies love it!

When we do a cleanse or detox, we ultimately become MORE fixated on sugary foods. Why? Because we just removed a source of energy that our body wants for survival. There is no need to "cut out" sugar (or anything else) in an attempt to detox.

4. Dealing with Family Comments & Diet Talk

At some point, commenting on other people's bodies became commonplace. In what world is that okay?

First things first - make sure you aren't the one promoting body criticism or conversations.

Making comments about someone else or their body isn't necessary. Honestly, it just doesn't concern you! The only comments helpful are those that can be fixed in less than five seconds (You have spinach in your tooth, a tag on your shirt, etc). If it's anything else, it's not really your business. So why comment? It's not helpful or uplifting.

But what if someone makes comments to you?

If you feel safe having this conversation, you can let them know that your body isn't a topic for conversation. You can 100% let people know that your body isn't up for discussion.

However, if you don't feel comfortable having that conversation (or it's someone you don't feel you can gently confront), try the validation route. If Aunt Karen is pushing her new keto diet on you, try "I'm so happy you found something you're enjoying. I don't think that's something that will be beneficial for me right now." And then pivot the conversation into a new vein!

By steering the conversation away, you can communicate that you don't have a desire to talk about the topic of weight/appearance/diets.

5. Holiday Self-Care

The holiday season can be depleting on our energies. Many of us are already pretty busy, and adding in all the holiday elements can start to make you feel that you're being pulled SO many different directions.

That's okay. Different seasons require different things. Sometimes priorities just need to shift a bit for a time. However, if you've shifted so much that you're no longer caring for yourself, you need to reevaluate.

Hit "Pause", take a step back, and ask yourself what one thing you could do for yourself in that moment. Maybe you need to fill up your water bottle, make a healthy snack, taking a 10 minute nap, or something else that would feel good. The goal is to communicate to your body "I see you, I hear you, I'm listening."

Sign up to work with me this month, and 10% of my profits will be donated to The Breasties! https://hello.dubsado.com/public/form/view/5de69dfe993ccb16c45257aa

Want to connect with Claire?

Instagram: @clairechewning

www.instagram.com/clairechewning Podcast: The Yours Chewly Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-yours-chewly-podcast/id1416761009 Her Facebook Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1933119400043415/

Happy Holidays!

As a really neat way of giving back, this month I'm featuring an amazing group called The Breasties. Some of you may know that my own mom passed away from breast cancer. While I was being tested for the BRCA gene (which I don't have), I had to consider what action I would take if my results were positive. That process (along with watching my mom's journey) really showed me why support & community is so vital! That's why I was so excited to come across The Breasties. This month, I'm donating a portion of every sale to this organization!

Thanks for supporting me AND this amazing group.

My first year in business (four years ago!), I created this fun spin on the 12 Days of Christmas song.

Recently I haven't been loving this word "healthy". I find that many people use it to designate foods that are "good" or "bad", and that isn't helpful! In my opinion, "healthy" doesn't have to refer to nutrient density. Something can be healthy for your heart, soul, mind, emotions, OR body, which means any food could be considered healthy.

And now, without further ado...

Welcome to the 12 Days of Healthy Christmas!

On the first day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

a partridge and a pear salad!

Make sure you're eating this month! We all tend to get pretty busy during the holidays, and sometimes we push ourselves to keep going with no food. (Or we tell ourselves we can wait until some big meal later in the day.)

Think ahead and consider your schedule. If you know there are going to be some jam packed days, think about how you'll eat well. Can you pack a lunch? I recommend trying something like a pear salad. (Recipe links at the end of the show notes!) You can make it once, and then have leftovers for a few days. When you take a bit of extra time to get the nutrients you need, you always feel better!

On the second day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

two loving turtle doves.

Turtle doves signify devoted love. During the holidays we're often thinking of loving other people. And while that is wonderful, I'd recommend you don't forget about yourself either. Try to take time to give yourself some true love. How do you need to be cared for? How can you make sure those needs are met?

Remember to come back to yourself, check in, and be sure you're meeting your own needs. A hot bath, an amazing candle, a gratitude practice, a movie in bed -- do what you need to do to uncharge and unwind.

On the third day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me....

three tips from French hens.

1. Something I really admire in French culture is their overall ability to take pleasure in their food. In France, meals tend to be long and leisurely. There is a sense of true enjoyment while people are eating. It's wonderful! As you enjoy holiday dinners, try to find moments to slow down savor.

2. I read the book French Women Don't Get Fat some time ago. Although I can't endorse everything, there were some things I really enjoyed. The author pointed out that French women rarely go to the gym. Instead, they work movement in throughout the day. Try to take the stairs, walk around the block, or do some stretching. Take the moments that you can to fit in a bit of movement.

3. Work in nutrient dense food early in the day. This is especially helpful when you know you'll be enjoying a large dinner or night out for the holidays. This isn't about creating rules and restrictions! It's a way of thinking about yourself and making sure you're feeling your best.

On the fourth day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me....

four phone calls to friends.

Holidays can be really emotional. I know I have lots of emotions! It's easy to want to turn to food for comfort during this season. Although emotional eating can be perfectly fine, emotionally overeating can make you feel worse.

Instead of snacking, who can you call?

On the fifth day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

five golden lemon rings in warm water.

First thing in the morning, I find it feels really good to drink some warm water. In addition, you can add in a few lemon slices. This can be really good for your stomach. It feels good, keeps you hydrated, and can even help improve digestion.

When you've been more active than usual, eating richer foods than normal, and just generally been doing more, even little things like an extra class of warm water in the mornings can make a difference you can feel!

It's an easy way to keep yourself feeling good this season!

On the sixth day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

six geese a'layin in bed.

Take the time to rest. When you have a chance, slip in a mediation, a nap, or an early bedtime. It's so necessary to give our bodies a chance to recharge.

In addition, you're less likely to overeat on sugary foods when you're energized from sleep.

On the seventh day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

seven graceful swans swimming.

Swans are upright, graceful, and they appear to glide across the water. Imagine yourself as a swan. Stand up straight, and don't hunch over. (That means putting your phone away too!)

Having upright posture increases your confidence. And the more you're visiting, mingling, dancing, and feeling good about yourself - the less time you feel compelled to browse the buffet (when you know aren't hungry) or head for the bar.

And that makes you feel good!

On the eight day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

eight maids of dairy free milking.

This can be quite a dairy consumption month! From desserts, creamy drinks & soups, cheese plates, and more - I can always feel it when I eat lots of dairy products. Even though I don't restrict foods, I do consider how I can reduce dairy. After all, I know that I feel better when I don't take in so much dairy. A lot of people feel like it takes a toll on their system too, and it just seems to slow everything down. (This isn't a rule! Just something to try.)

On the ninth day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

9 ladies dancing.

Let loose! Have fun! The more you enjoy your life, the more flow you'll have day to day.

On the tenth day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

ten lords leaping of faith.

Trust yourself. Trust your instincts.

It's one thing to plan to get back to normal once the holidays are over, and another to trust that it WILL happen. But it will. I know I might gain a few pounds this month, because I'm eating more than normal. That's okay! As I get back to my normal routines, my body will naturally readjust.

Rather than stressing about it, enjoy your present moment. Know that this schedule (and these eating patterns) aren't permanent.

On the eleventh day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

eleven pipers piping frosting on cookies.

Making cookies is such a fun holiday pastime. Have fun with it! Last weekend I took a holiday baking and decorating class, and it was so enjoyable. Getting to enjoy cookie baking is one of my favorite parts of Christmas! I hope diets and food restrictions don't tempt you to skip fun traditions and holiday opportunities this year.

Let yourself be present in the moment, and allow yourself to enjoy each day.

On the twelfth day of healthy Christmas, my true love gave to me...

twelve drummers drumming on your head.

Have you ever tried intuitively drinking alcohol?

I suggest asking yourself why you want to drink, and what you actually want to drink. (If the point is to make a certain activity fun...maybe you could try a different activity!) In addition, you can consider how a drink makes you feel. Personally, I try to avoid sugary drinks because I never feel good when I drink them. Hydration helps too - take in lots of water if you plan to drink.

I hope you try some of these out. And if you do? Come tell us all about it! We'd love to hear what you tried and how it worked over in the Facebook Community. You can find us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/realfoodfirstcommunity/

And if you're ready for food freedom and body confidence, and you know you're ready to dive in...do it now! Part of your investment will go straight to an amazing organization that benefits women.

Fill out this form to work with me (and part of the proceeds automatically go to a good cause): https://hello.dubsado.com/public/form/view/5de69dfe993ccb16c45257aa

PS - Interested in those pear recipes?

Slow Cooker Chai Spiced Poached Pears https://caitlinball.com/2014/12/slow-cooker-chai-spiced-poached-pears/ Balsamic Chicken & Pear Salad https://caitlinball.com/2016/12/balsamic-chicken-pear-salad/

Pear & Squash Quinoa Salad https://caitlinball.com/2015/12/pear-squash-quinoa-salad/