Read It And Beep

Read It And Beep

By Alena HelzerComedyComedy Interviews
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Read It And Beep episodes

  • Alena Years 2001-2003

    Have you ever wondered what it would be like to listen to someone grow up through their diary? That might be a niche desire, but it's one I am fulfilling. Hi, I'm Alena and I have 2 decades worth of diary entries. I've done episodes with guests where we read our entries and now I'm going to read them chronologically on a weekly basis. Today's episode covers 2001-2003, a young elementary-aged Alena. 

    Follow @readitandbeep on Instagram for photos from today's episode as well as other nostalgia content. 

    18 min
  • A Decade of Career Choices

    Alena reads entries she wrote in 2010 questioning her future career. Should she join the CIA or marry an architect? Would it be okay to marry an Orthodontist if that meant not moving to Connecticut? These are things that have kept her up for 10 years! 

    Follow @readitandbeep on Instagram and @lenacuisine on TikTok

    19 min
  • The Perfect Boy Book with Grace

    While moving apartments, Grace found the book of all books: an old composition notebook titled The Perfect Boy. All throughout middle school she, along with 4 other friends, wrote a book coaching their version of the perfect boy. They covered everything from style (bow ties ALL the way!) to how to handle a girl's menstrual cycle. Hint: she probably hates it just as much as you do! Grace sat down with me (and her boyfriend) and we read through this insightful and eye-opening book. 

    If you're not already, follow @readitandbeep where I post funny journal entries and behind the scenes content. I also post photos of my dog so for that reason alone you should follow. If you or someone you know has some old journals they're dying to crack open, slide into my DMs. 

    42 min
  • Ellery
    Friends Ellery and Alena read from their middle school diaries. Both of them relive the moment their friends told them they needed to wear a bra. They read some sad entries talking about bad friends, mean teachers, and sick days. They go full emo in this episode, including singing "I'm not a perfect person!" For more content follow @readitandbeep and visit readitandbeep.com
    37 min
  • Susan
    Susan and I may have grown up in different decades and in different sides of the country, but our journals still ring relatable. In today's episode you'll hear Susan lament over boys who don't like her and a canceled Dawson's Creek. You'll hear me talk about a fateful day when a love letter ended up in the wrong locker.
    For photos and more fun check out @readitandbeep and readitandbeep.com

    If you like this week's episode, please rate and review the podcast!
    32 min
  • Samantha Helzer
    After Kirsten and I secretly read her journals and deemed them "boring", Sammy has returned to prove us wrong and she does an excellent job. We both read old song lyrics, including one originating a genre I call "Post-Christmas" music. For photos and more fun check out @readitandbeep and readitandbeep.com

    If you like this week's episode, please rate and review the podcast!
    41 min
  • Janely Sanchez
    This episode was recorded at Chismosas salon with my hilarious hair stylist Janely. Aside from reading from our journals, we chat about how we were type cast as Angelica Pickles from the Rugrats, David Archuleta, and putting an expiration date on relationships. Janely shares some wise advice like making your journal pass the Bechdel Test.
    38 min
  • Stacey Harkey | Comedian
    Stacey Harkey joins Alena in cracking open some embarrassing old journal entries. Alena misuses both anagrams and potemkin villages, but hey, she never claimed to be a genius. Stacey opens up about coming out and his fascination with Lou Bega's hit Mambo #5. For behind the scenes, check out readitandbeep.com as well as @readitandbeep. You can (and should) follow Stacey @staceyharkey.
    42 min
  • Kirsten Helzer
    Today I'm reading old diaries with my younger sister Kirsten. And not just anyone's diaries.... we snuck into our other sister's room to read from her's, despite the warning "Do not read or I will stab you!" What can I say, we're pretty brave. We read about the same day from their different perspectives, talk about cursed kisses, and almost get caught! For more fun, follow @readitandbeep
    35 min
  • Meghan Bean | Comedian and Diary Keeper
    Alena interrogates comedian Meghan Bean in her LA home. They crack open old journals and talk about the times they've caught someone reading their journal. (Or they've been caught reading someone's journal.) Topics range from Limited Too vs. Children's Place to learning HTML for Myspace. Follow @readitandbeep as well as @megbean1
    41 min

About Read It And Beep

From the publisher's feed

Get in losers- we're going to comb through 20 years of my diaries and personal writings.