Real Good Recovery Podcast

Anyone who is truly in recovery has reached out for help, usually in a moment of complete desperation. This is important. This is vital to real good recovery. We have to, from the depths of our souls, call out in defeat and ask for help. Enabling addicts so that desperation never arrives might be denying them the opportunity to recover. Blessed are those who call out in the dark night of the soul: Help me! That's when it all starts to turn around.

Music by Kevin MacLeod

Early on, I thought life had to be made up of hard, back-breaking work, or work that bored me, or work that stifled my creativity. I had no idea my income-producing work, or my service in the recovery communities, could be so fun and fulfilling and in sync with my true nature. But first, I had to get to know myself. Who am I? What do I like? What am I good at? Those were my questions to answer.

Music by Kevin MacLeod

Getting into recovery means giving up the thing that made life bearable. That thing also eventually made life unbearable. If we give that up, are we sentenced to a life of dull boredom, killing time until death takes us? I think not! Life after recovery, if it's real good recovery, can be extremely fun, satisfying, and delightful.

For a naturally healthy person, self care is the norm. For me, self care is a radical idea. Who am I—a person who felt like a nothing earlier in life—to have needs and to get those needs met? It may seem like an inconvenient truth that I have needs. But I also have the power, thanks to my recovery, to get those needs met. Listen to how it all went down.

Music by Kevin MacLeod

I've known for a while that the time I spend on Facebook during work hours is affecting my life in a negative way. It wasn't until I read a book titled "Deep Work" by Cal Newport that I realized how my addictive personality fed into the Facebook business model. I devised a method to break the addiction.

Music by Kevin MacLeon

I didn't know this before I got into recovery, but I desperately need solitude in the morning. I say I'm desperate for it, rather than I would "prefer" to have solitude in the morning. It's the difference between me being a sick and scattered person, or me being a centered and functioning person. I exert tremendous willpower to get what I need in this case.

Music by Kevin MacLeon

As usual with me, my early beliefs were totally backwards. I thought that if you were awesome, you had to be arrogant. How wrong I was.

Over the decades of my recovery from addictions, I've developed many strategies and tools I use to get me through hard times, when tragedy or catastrophe strikes. During those times, it's not possible or practical to develop a spiritual practice or to learn tools like meditation and journaling. Hopefully this episode will be an encouragement to get ready now for hard times ahead.

It's part of the human experience to feel hurt and rejected by other people. When we are born into dysfunctional or addicted or hurtful families, we probably feel this more often than do most people. Before real good recovery, I spent my energy in misery and resentment. But deep into recovery, I take actions to help myself through these situations. Here's the "tool kit" of practices and strategies that I use to help me process what just happened, and come through it with peace and empowerment.

Because of my early history, where people who should have been loving and kind were not, I sometimes get confused about who I should go to for love and support. This exercise gives me a graphic tool to approach life with a clear mind.