Recovery Rebirth Podcast

What Is Recovery? 

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast, we attempt to define recovery. One very straightforward definition is “an improved quality of life”.  However someone improves their quality of life, it must be self directed, people can’t be coerced or coddled into recovery. Recovery should look at root causes, look for a future episode on this topic. 

Dom provides an overview of the concept of a recovery coach and the components of recovery: self-directed, empowering, a holistic approach, focuses on the person’s strength, peer support, focuses on the person’s strength, a sense of hope.

Jillian reflects on her early days in recovery when she felt disempowered and had a victim mentality. She shares t her experience with recovery, which has included learning to implement boundaries not being emotionally reactive when triggered by someone’s addiction. She observes that recovery is not allowing others behaviors/choices nor her own maladaptive coping mechanisms (rooted in codependency) dictate her life. It’s no longer operation on autopilot.

Recovery is a lifelong process. Just as people exercise their entire life to maintain their health and fitness, recovery has to be maintained to sustain recovery. Just as people have coaches in sports, recovery coaches understand “the game” and are honest about where you’re lacking and help hold you accountable. A good coach also helps you remove obstacles and problem solve. 

We touch on harm reduction, an incremental approach primarily focused on saving lives. Medically assisted treatment (MAT) is another component of harm reduction. Removing barriers to housing and breaking stigmas is also crucial to recovery!  We also discuss the concept of micro moves that lead to dramatic change and an improved quality of life. 

You are not alone and recovery is possible! We’re rooting for you!  #WeDoRecover 

Resources

Recovery Rebirth Episodes 

Boundaries

https://www.vivacityventures.com/boundaries/

Recovery Sponsorship and Accountability

https://www.vivacityventures.com/recovery-sponsorship-and-accountability/

Coping with Homelesness

https://www.vivacityventures.com/coping-with-homelessness/

We’re baaaaaaaack!  Hello beloved listeners, we apologize for the unplanned hiatus.  Life got very lifey & our regular recording/release schedule was disrupted. We hope you’ve been well while we’ve been away. In this episode, we update on what’s been going on in our lives the last several months.

Jillian talks about transitioning to life as a single empty nester, work overwhelm, navigating dynamics on a family vacation and the recent ending of the healthiest relationship she’s experienced. She reflects on her recent relationship & absence of her typical maladaptive coping mechanisms, (e.g. the compulsion to rescue/ fix). For the first time, she experienced emotional safety & open, honest communication. Healing instead of being wounded in a relationships was unprecedented. She still struggles with letting go, a core trait of codependency. But having a support system through recovery is allows her to accept more and suffer less. As always, the tools of recovery are helping her to accept life on life’s term.

Dominick provides an update on big life changes, including moving and taking a new job after over 20 years of being self-employed. He was reaching a point of burnout and exhaustion with work and his living environment was becoming increasingly unsavory. The fact that he works from home meant there was no escape from an undesirable environment. After some very intentional prayer, he made some drastic changes. Today, he’s living in a serene environment and working for a holistic treatment center. He avows that these blessings coming to fruition were in part to him strongly & consistently putting his desires out to the universe.  

We underscore the necessity of recovery  housing as access to safe and affordable housing is central to thriving in life. 

Thank you for your patience & grace while we were away, we look forward to continuing the conversation about myriad topics through the lens of recovery.  We’re excited to share resources to support your recovery journeys, just as you support ours. We’re rooting for you! 

This time of year can be a joyous occasion or it can be a trigger for stress and anxiety. The Recovery Rebirth Podcast is sharing our take on the Holiday Season.

Many people also struggle with seasonal affective disorder (SAD) during the winter months. It’s no secret that many in recovery are already prone to anxiety and/or depression, the lack of sunshine can amplify feelings of sadness & hopelessness. This can also be a time of year where we feel acute sadness about loved ones we’ve lost through either death, estrangement or separation. The rates of relapse & suicide are sadly higher during what is supposed “the most wonderful time of the year” In reality, it can be the most stressful & depressing time of the year.

Our families of origin can be a tremendous source of anxiety and stress during the holidays. Some of us find our family of choice through our recovery programs. We find safe spaces to share our experience, strength & hope among others who understand & don’t judge us. Unlike family gatherings where we may experience anger, resentment & shame, we can feel acceptance, serenity & support with our recovery families.

We also touch on the pitfalls of social media during the holidays. It can be easy to fall into the trap of comparing our lives to others. Social media isn’t real life.  It is not an accurate reflection of the full scope of what’s going on in other people’s lives. It’s often the carefully curated highlight reels that we see. A social media break can be an excellent form of self-care for those of us prone to the “compare & despair” mentality.

We talk about strategies to combat stress during the holidays (or any time of year) Simplifying and not doing things out of obligation is one way to reduce stress at the holidays. We realize it’s easier for some people than others to simplify during the holidays, but encourage you to simplify wherever possible. 

Remember, there are always meetings available, even on the major holidays, where you can be among fellow travelers. It’s a safe space to connect with folks who share & understand your concern, frustration, resentment & feelings of hopelessness. The holidays are a great time to practice boundaries & also letting go of things outside our control (spoiler:most things are outside our control!). It’s also a prime opportunity to connect with our Higher Power or God of our Understanding. 

We’re wishing you a serene & joy-filled holiday season full of memories you’ll cherish for years to come. No matter what the holiday season may hold, we lovingly suggest you to take it One Day at a Time. And please remember you don’t have to get through it alone. Recovery is a “we” program.  

Resources

Websites

https://www.samhsa.gov/

https://www.aa.org/

https://www.swmichiganal-anon.org/

Previous Episodes

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast, we delve into relapse prevention is a prevalent topic in the world of recovery. While people often think relapse only happens with substance use disorder, anyone in recovery can fall prey to emotional/mental relapse. We highlight the phases leading up to relapse and myriad behaviors that foretell relapse could be imminent (e.g. neglecting self-care, being filled with resentment)  

We underscore the difference between a slip and true relapse. Early in recovery, it’s easy to slip back into the addictive behavior, while relapse is having a sustained period of sobriety and falling back into addictive behaviors and using people, places or things in an addictive way.

Stress and boredom can trigger relapse. Some people relapse even when things are going well in their lives. Addiction can flare up at any time.

Regardless of the addictive behavior people are struggling with, there is hope for sustainable recovery. 

We’re rooting for you!  

Resources

Recovery Rebirth Episodes 

Triggers

Red Flags in Recovery 

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast, we discuss overwhelm which often leads to burnout. We all experience episodes or seasons of life where the deluge of stressors is too much for us. In these times, we could really benefit from self-care, but are also most likely to neglect ourselves because our reserves are depleted. 

Jillian reflects on her experiences with overwhelm, including her first panic attack. She also talks about the overwhelm she felt while in a relationship with an active alcoholic and acting like an “emotional drunk” prior to recovery. 

Dom shares about the anxiety he’s experienced since he was a child, including panic attacks. Being self-employed and running three businesses can cause him overwhelm and concerns of impending burnout. Being a perfectionist and having incredibly high expectations of ourselves, amplifies anxiety. 

A sign of burnout can be lack of enthusiasm for activities you typically love to do. Some of the self-care options we discuss are deep breathing exercises, taking a break/walking away from your desk at work), and walks in nature. When you’re in a calmer frame of mind, writing down affirmations we can revisit when our anxiety/stress flares up again.

If life feels overwhelming, pause, see how you’re feeling, take a break and see if you can identify the source of the overwhelm. We hope this episode can offer some insights and resources that will help when you find yourself overwhelmed and approaching burnout. While we are proponents of living One Day at a Time, in times of extreme overwhelm, sometimes we need to focus on one moment at a time. You are not alone in this recovery journey!  We’re rooting for you!  

Resources

Self-Care/Self-Compassion

Breathing Techniques

https://www.priorygroup.com/blog/breathing-exercises-for-anxiety

https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/breathing-exercises-anxiety/

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/324417#:~:text=The%204%2D7%2D8%20breathing,the%20practice%20of%20breath%20regulation.

Recovery Rebirth Episodes 

Recovery from Unworthiness

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast, we discuss a concept foreign to many people entering recovery–boundaries. Many of us have never seen this behavior modeled within our family systems. We may be shocked to hear “no is a complete sentence” We may believe that boundaries are somehow “selfish” and find that our loved ones in active addiction believe the same because we’re no longer enabling them. We often experience resistance and manipulation from people who benefited from our lack of boundaries. Trust us when we tell you boundaries are in fact necessary to healthy, balanced relationships.

We discuss the difficulties for those who identify as (recovering) people pleasers with setting boundaries. We clarify the difference between boundaries and walls; which can be difficult to discern, especially when we’re learning this new skill.  Having boundaries isn’t telling others what to do, it’s simply letting others know what we’re not willing to accept. We believe that setting boundaries is a wonderful form of self-care/self-love. 

We share our individual experiences with learning to set boundaries. Sometimes we set the boundaries with others; e.g. not being around our loved ones when they are active in their addictions. Other times, we set boundaries for ourselves, for example what we eat or how much time we spend watching shows or on social media. We also underscore five different types of boundaries.  

We have found that our relationships are more authentic and healthier as we set and maintain boundaries.  A lack of boundaries can lead to burnout and significant resentment. Resentment is often a cue that we need to set a boundary. On the flipside, honoring our boundaries can bring a great deal of peace. 

If you are struggling to set boundaries, we hope this episode will help you to find the courage begin. May you experience the improved relationships and increased peace that naturally flow out of this process. We’re rooting for you! 

Resources

Books 

“Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life”–Henry Cloud & John Townsend

“Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself”–

Articles 

Podcasts

Boundaries Me

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-boundaries-me-podcast/id1488880049

Beyond Bitchy

Recovery Rebirth Episodes 

Triggers 

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast, we discuss a fairly ubiquitous term–triggers. In the world of addiction & recovery, triggers can cause us to relapse & fall back in our addictive behaviors. Triggers are also discussed in psychology, especially when treating PTSD.  A trigger can be defined as something that causes an unexpected emotional response.  

Jilian explores her triggers, which are rooted in her fears of abandonment & rejection stemming from her relationship with her mother. These fears manifest as codependency, people pleasing, and love addiction among other behaviors when she’s triggered.  

Dom delves into his fears of financial insecurity borne out of his childhood experience of observing his parents wrestle fears of financial scarcity.  He observes that even when things are going well money-wise, the old fears of scarcity can resurface.

Sometimes the thought that something could go wrong is enough to trigger our fears & the cascade of maladaptive coping mechanisms we’ve developed. When triggered, we experience four trauma responses: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. When in this state, our amygdala (brain’s fear center) is activated & our prefrontal cortex (center of reasoning) goes offline & we feel helpless or out of control. We talk about how certain songs or smells can trigger painful memories. We also ponder the perspective that “triggers are our teachers”.   

We discuss techniques & tools to calm ourselves when triggered such as grounding ourselves in the moment. Repeating the Serenity Prayer can be a powerful tool, especially focusing on the things we can change. Meditation, visualizations, and journaling are other tactics to overcome triggers. Reminding ourselves that “It’s not happening now” when painful memories come flooding back can re-center us. We touch on Dr. Joe Dispenza & Brendon Burchard’s approaches to creating a new vision for the future since triggers are  tied to our past.

We hope you will hear something in this episode that will help you navigate triggers & transform them into learning opportunities rather than being paralyzed by fears. Please see resources below for additional information.

Resources

https://psychcentral.com/addictions/5-tips-for-managing-triggers-during-addiction-recovery

https://www.betterup.com/blog/triggers

https://www.verywellmind.com/ptsd-triggers-and-coping-strategies-2797557

https://www.masterclass.com/articles/fight-flight-freeze-fawn

https://drjoedispenza.com/

Recovery Rebirth Episodes on Trauma Recovery  

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast we explore the concept of recovery capital. The major aspects include: personal, community, and social. Whether it’s improving access to housing, healthy food, recovery coaches, etc. recovery capital supports sustained, long-term recovery. The continuum of care is a crucial aspect of recovery. 

We highlight the discrepancy in access to recovery for communities of color or other marginalized communities. As William Cope-Moyers says, “addiction doesn’t discriminate, neither should recovery”  

We discuss the importance of peer support.during recovery–people who understand our lived experience.  We also talk about the positive impact to the economy by supporting people in  Recovery capital is measurable in other tangible ways, which increases opportunities for funding. Historically, the funding has been focused on prevention vs. treatment and sustained recovery because there has been more data to back up the efficacy.  Recovery capital offers the ability to measure the data.

Resources

https://recoverycapital.io/

https://r1learning.com/blog/2020/recoverycapital

https://www.chestnut.org/Resources/4c4bb112-3d59-4984-98cb-3b637378965a/Recovery-Capital-Scale.pdf

https://www.naadac.org/assets/2416/whitewlcloudw2008_recovery_capital_a_primer.pdf

https://recovery.gloo.us/rci

Books

Podcasts 

Recovery Rebirth Podcast — Sponsorship and Accountability with mentions of recovery Capital

https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cudml2YWNpdHl2ZW50dXJlcy5jb20vZmVlZC8/episode/aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cudml2YWNpdHl2ZW50dXJlcy5jb20vP3A9MTIzOA?sa=X&ved=0CAUQkfYCahcKEwjwwOjSjeb_AhUAAAAAHQAAAAAQLA

Catastrophizing means that a person fixates on the worst possible outcome and treats it as likely, even when it is not.

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast, we continue our conversation about health issues, focusing on catastrophizing–the tendency to focus on the worst case scenario. Many people in recovery had chaotic home environments. We were always waiting for the other shoe to drop and sometimes our worst fears have come to pass. But, many times we suffer needlessly about things that never happen. Living in fear and scarcity mindsets can cause us to catastrophize.

Jillian discusses her fears about an upcoming surgery and strategies she’s used to calm herself down when her anxiety spikes. Dominick touches on his fears surrounding finances which he observed in his parents and has followed him into adulthood. We also talk about fears of abandonment, a common theme in our podcasts.

Studies have shown that catastrophizing is a type of trauma response. Sometimes we can struggle to accept that good things can happen or compliments from others. This can be because we’re so used to bad things happening or don’t feel worthy of praise. 

The Serenity Prayer is a helpful recovery tool when we’re in a doom spiral. A gratitude practice can support a healthy state of mind. Focusing on the outcome we want vs. what we fear will happen can help us feel more in control of our fate. Some people believe strongly in the Law of Attraction, that what you focus on you will draw to yourself. 

We encourage you to let your faith be stronger than your fear and to live One Day at a Time.

Resources

Recovery Rebirth Episode 016

The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment–Eckhart Tolle 

In this episode of the Recovery Rebirth Podcast we continue our conversation about health issues, focusing on chronic pain. 

Jillian shares about her recent experience with a major surgery, anxiety that ensued and her recovery process. The surgery didn’t go quite as planned which impacted her recovery time. She found that her mind was frustrated with her physical limitations after surgery. She was able to spend a few weeks with her daughter who came to support her in her recovery, which was a tremendous blessing. 

Dom details his experience developing shingles, which has been a very painful, protracted condition. He’s been experiencing chronic pain for a month. And unfortunately, with shingles, there aren’t any great treatments for pain, it’s a matter of waiting it out. While unrelenting pain has tested his sobriety, he’s leaned into his program. And he’s working  with his healthcare practitioners who are aware that he’s in recovery.

It was yet another opportunity to practice acceptance of something we were powerless over, in this case, our bodies. While we try to live One Day at a Time, during the physical recovery from our health issues, sometimes it’s been one moment at a time.

We also discuss the issue with access to pain medication due to the opioid addiction crisis. So people suffering from chronic pain who can’t get opiods will turn to street drugs and overdose. Taking painkillers away completely isn’t the answer, there needs to be a balanced approach with the prescribing.

If you are dealing with chronic pain while in recovery, we encourage you to reach out for support from friends in recovery and your healthcare provider. Please don’t let the pain cause you to turn to a temporary “solution” that could put your health at far greater risk!

Resources

Pain Management in Recovery 

https://americanaddictioncenters.org/opiates/pain-management

https://store.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/d7/priv/sma13-4671.pdf

Shingles Treatment 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/shingles/diagnosis-treatment/drc-20353060

https://www.aafp.org/pubs/afp/issues/2005/0915/p1082.html

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/drugs/21561-gabapentin