Respect Circles - The Podcast

Today we're diving headfirst into a topic that we've been wrestling with, especially due to some recent events in the news. We've found ourselves just a little fired up, and we think that the timing just might be right to jump into a deeper discussion on this subject.

Over the last couple of years, social tensions in the U.S. have brought much needed conversation around the topics of inequity and bias, as we discussed last week with our guest, Dr. Neal Siler. In this episode, we're expanding on things and pulling back the curtain further on privilege and bias, as we hope to provoke your thinking and inspire you to action.

We believe it's time to identify our own privilege and move to a place where everyone receives the same type of treatment. Let's open ourselves up to learn, grow, speak out, and to be an ally!

As always, we love to hear your feedback. If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message.

You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/ , or by visiting our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening. We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends!

In this episode you'll hear:

• Some of the ways that Stephanie has seen privilege throughout her life [5:17]
• The intersectionality that exists when we talk about privilege [7:44]
• Visible and invisible identities, and the power in putting yourself in the other person's shoes [12:45]
• What is the very first thing you need to do before you can be an ally and use the privilege you have for good [13:48]
• White privilege, and why white people often get defensive when it is addressed [14:51]
• Why we believe that children are strong enough to know the truth and to be a part of this conversation on privilege and bias [19:21]
• The recent blowback regarding the Supreme Court nomination in our country [24:43]
• Our thoughts on the recent lawsuit filed against the NFL [32:55]
• Why staying silent is not the answer when it comes to privilege and bias [44:03]

Links & Resources:

21: Spotlight On Cultural Humility: The Process of Healing with Dr. R. Neil Siler

Verywell Mind Article, What Is White Privilege?:

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-white-privilege-5070460

Today is a very special episode, as we look back on the tremendous contributions of Dr. Martin Luther King, how he would feel about the changes we have made, and the current state of America 60 years later. Our expert guest is Dr. R. Neil Siler, who is here to share his wisdom and experiences on the impact of racial trauma on individuals, and to talk about ways we can move to a healthier state.

Dr. R. Neal Siler is pastor emeritus of the First Shiloh Baptist Church, Mechanicsville, VA. He is a clinician, spiritual director, and founder of The Healing Place Center for Counseling and Spiritual Formation. He is a University and Seminary in Toronto, Ontario, the Director of the Spiritual Direction Program and Director of D.E.I. Initiatives for Healing Care Ministries in Ashland, Ohio. He is a contributing author to UMI's Pastor's Precepts Commentary, the author of How I Got Over: Healing for the African American Soul and several other books and small group curricula. Much of his work focuses on the psychological and systemic issues that create pain and brokenness for African Americans and marginalized people. His wife Dr. Sharon E. Siler serves alongside him in ministry, and they delight in sharing life with two children, their spouses, and three grandchildren.

This episode with Dr. Siler is a much needed conversation about the state of our nation, while serving up a message of hope as we build a more equitable humanity.

As always, we love to hear your feedback. If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message.

You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by visiting our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening. We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends!

In this episode you'll hear:

• Dr. Siler's take on the words of Dr. Martin Luther King and his dream [6:02]
• How can we help people live beyond just the ideology of Dr. King and truly understand the purpose of what he had to stand for [8:59]
• The reasons he believes that race not being addressed effectively in this country [11:44]
• How we can promote moving towards the solutions, and what is currently working in the battle against racism [15:10]
• Dr. Siler's thoughts on taking race-based discrimination to heart in order to move forward with intention [19:28]
• Actions steps for making a difference right now [27:10]
• What we feel can be a path to true healing in America [29:11]
• What cultural competency is, and isn't, about [32:34]
• How Dr. King would want us to show up as leaders in this movement of change that is needed [34:56]

Links & Resources:

The Healing Place Center for Counseling and Spiritual Formation Contact #: 804-277-3831

Dr. Siler's Book, How I Got Over: Healing for the African American Soul

I Have A Dream Speech (Martin Luther King, Jr., August 28, 1963):

Text: https://www.ihaveadreamspeech.us/

Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dKimoybmEo

American Public Health Association Documentary, Racism is a Public Health Crisis: https://www.apha.org/topics-and-issues/health-equity/racism-and-health/racism-declarations

Emmett Till: The Murder That Shocked the World and Propelled the Civil Rights Movement by Devery S. Anderson

Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents by Isabel Wilkerson

As we continue our look at what makes an effective leader, today we dive deeper into the concept of emotional intelligence and how developing it can contribute to your success as a leader and in life. Being results driven as a leader is crucial, but the skills known as emotional intelligence are just as important to be aware of as you work to bring out the best in yourself, and each and every person that you lead. In today's episode, we reveal how you can nurture and prioritize your mental health, as well as what it means to be an empathic leader, and we hope to provide you with the resources, tools (and lessons from our personal experiences!) to help you on your own leadership journey.

As always, we love to hear your feedback. If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message.

You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by visiting our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening. We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends!

In this episode you'll hear:

How getting in check with your own emotions and knowing yourself will benefit you as a leader [7:46] What self-regulation is all about, and how it will allow you to manage, respond, and react to every situation that you encounter [10:43] How sharing your emotions can not only be life-changing for you, but for those that you share them with [19:38] Our thoughts on whether nature or nurture plays a bigger role when it comes to emotional intelligence [22:28] The way that organizations can negatively impacted by leaders who do not possess emotional intelligence [27:18] Action steps you can take right now to boost your own emotional intelligence [33:14]

Links & Resources:

Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman: https://amzn.to/32fQu69

The Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion by Jonathan Haidt: https://amzn.to/3nWjBTz

https://www.inc.com/marcel-schwantes/15-websites-that-will-make-your-emotional-intelligence-better.html

https://hbr.org/2017/02/emotional-intelligence-has-12-elements-which-do-you-need-to-work-on

https://www.hbo.com/succession

Today's conversation is all about leadership, which we believe is such an important topic because everyone is a leader in their own way. With several decades of combined leadership experience, we want to begin a broader dialogue about why leadership matters and some of the lessons we've learned, along with resources that will be helpful in your own personal leadership journey.

We want to stress that this conversation isn't just for individuals that have a formal leadership title. We believe that there are always new things to be learned as we explore leadership in our daily lives, and opportunities for us to step up and lead in a number of different ways.

As always, we love to hear your feedback. If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message.

You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by visiting our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening. We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends!

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why we feel so strongly that everyone is a leader, regardless of his or her formal title [1:46]
• The very first thing that comes to Stephanie's mind when she thinks of leadership [3:32]
• Some of AJ's personal experience with the leadership positions that he's held over the years [4:30]
• Where many leaders today are going wrong by not focusing on the right things [7:52]
• A big taboo of leadership, and the dangers of practicing leadership the "traditional" way [9:26]
• The role that vulnerability plays in leadership [16:39]
• A difficult decision that AJ had to make in 2020, from a family leadership standpoint [18:17]
• The power and importance of communication in leadership [33:24]
• Action steps you can take right now to assess where you are as leader, where you want to be, and what you can do to bridge the gap [34:05]

Links & Resources:

Recommended Readings and TED Talk by Dr. Brené Brown: Dare to Lead: Brave Work.Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts. https://amzn.to/33wSaIS

Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead https://amzn.to/3tx5k3n

Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience https://amzn.to/33kBULf

TED Talk (with over 56M views): https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_the_power_of_vulnerability

Last week in the United States, we acknowledged the one-year anniversary of the events that took place last January 6th, which we all see as a very dark day in our history. Horrific actions taken on this date have created even more division in our country, and today on the podcast we want to explore where we are right now and what it means moving forward, as we redefine what democracy really means to each and every one of us.

As you'll hear, we both think that ultimately being decent human beings and having a foundational understanding of what differentiates a lie from the truth is a great starting point that we can all begin at, because when done right, democracy is a beautiful thing that we should all be a part of.

As always, we love to hear your feedback. If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message. You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by visiting our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening! We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends. We can't wait for you to join us this year on Respect Circles!

In this episode you'll hear:

• The important line that got crossed on January 6th, 2021, and why this means so much for the entire country's future [5:49]
• The evolutionary approach that is happening where we are seeing an erosion of our systems, institutions, and our way of life [9:40]
• How the stance on social justice issues changed to fit the narrative [14:45]
• Why making the memorial and one-year anniversary political is so disturbing [19:37]
• What is the beauty of democracy [20:49]
• How we can all start to redefine what democracy means to us, what we will you stand for, and what we will stand against [22:27]
• What is is not the time for right now, and the opportunity we have at this point in time to learn from each other [26:31]
• The need to become more critical in our thinking and to start challenging the status quo [29:55]
• The power we have when all of our voices singing together [32:10]

In our final episode of Respect Circles for 2021, we take a look back at some of our learning and growth during the past year. We also reveal our personal goals for 2022, and share our vision for expanding our podcast and serving even more people.

There is a lot of good happening in the world right now. We are so grateful for the opportunity to speak with you each week as we all gain new perspectives. We thank you so much for your support helping Respect Circles already become a top 5% podcast worldwide! Without you this wouldn't be possible, and we look forward to exploring new topics with you in the new year.

As always, we love to hear your feedback. If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message.

You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by visiting our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening! We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends. See you in the new year!

In this episode you'll hear:

• What the holiday traditions mean for us as we come to the end of yet another year [3:34]
• Our year in review and some reflections we've had along the way [7:23]
• A conversation around where we are as a society as it pertains to mental health [12:23]
• The personal growth we have experienced in 2021 specifically because of this podcast, plus the opportunity Respect Circles has given us [16:17]
• Our goals for 2022, and where we see this podcast heading [21:04]
• Why your story is always worth sharing [24:30]

Links & Resources:

https://www.listennotes.com/podcasts/respect-circles-the-podcast-stephanie-mbQLx4tIqeK/

As we head into the holidays, we thought it would be a great time to share some things that are meaningful to us, as well as venture into a discussion on what we're looking for as we head into a new year. Weighing on our hearts right now is pondering what it really means to be human, and how each one of us can strive to be kinder to the people that cross our paths. Ultimately, you can only control what you can control and how you show your heart to others, but if you're able to love others and look for creative opportunities to show them kindness, we know you'll find yourself living a more rewarding life in the ways that matter most.

We hope this conversation encourages you to think and examine your own outlook and behavior as we end one year and prepare to begin another. Let's see how we can all inject more kindness into humanity in order to get back to where we need to be.

We love to hear your feedback! If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message. You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by viewing our website at www.respectcircles.com too . We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening! We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends. See you next week!

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why this is the most magical time of the year for AJ, and the big question he'd like people to ponder this holiday season [5:21]
• What it really means to be "human" [7:00]
• What Stephanie is seeing that disturbs her, particularly online, and how we can reframe our approach to these situations [8:26]
• The role that basic decency plays when something horrific happens, and a current event where this was not displayed [10:41]
• Why AJ feels that kindness is a virtue that we need to practice on a consistent basis [14:44]
• Ways to being added more kindness into your life right now [16:56]
• How AJ is tackling the issue of binary thinking in the world today [18:12]
• A simple practice that Stephanie uses to infuse more kindness into the world [20:51]
• The overarching message that performings certain acts of kindness gives to others [24:41]
• Why being kind shouldn't be viewed as a weakness or displaying vulnerability [27:01]
• A reminder to connect with the people that we love, especially at this time of year [27:39]

Links & Resources:

https://www.respectcircles.com/13-the-power-of-gratitude/

What's it really like to be a "#GirlDad" in today's world? Along with AJ, we are so excited to have two other fathers of young women as our guests on the podcast. On today's episode, Matthew Cole and Kevin Wright share their perspectives, explore what fatherhood means to them, and answer important questions around navigating the journey of fatherhood in this day and age. We hope you find this episode informative and impactful and enjoy this conversation we had with Matthew and Kevin, whether you have daughters or not.

We love to hear your feedback! If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message. You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by viewing our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening! We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends. See you next week!

In this episode you'll hear:

• Some of Matthew and Kevin's real life experiences as #GirlDads [5:04]
• A discussion around some of the criticisms surrounding the use of this hashtag [9:05]
• The importance of recognizing the individuality of your daughters as a #GirlDad [14:17]
• How fatherhood has changed both Matthew and Kevin [18:27]
• The steps they each have taken to prepare their daughters in the best way possible for adulthood [24:29]
• The way that Matthew and Kevin strike the right balance of providing life lessons while protecting their daughters [30:07]
• Their advice for other #GirlDads who want to support their daughters in navigating the journey of growing up [38:02]
• The role that tough love plays as a #GirlDad [43:23]
• What scares both Matthew and Kevin as fathers of young women [44:59]

Links & Resources:

​​Matthew Cole's Contact Info: [email protected]

Kevin Wright's Contact Info: [email protected] 952-207-5339

As we head into the holiday season, we recognize this time as one of celebration and being with family and friends. Yet, we also know that there are many people in our communities that continue to struggle with getting their basic needs met. Today we're excited to share with you another one of our "Spotlights on Extraordinary People", where we highlight people in our communities and share how they are making a difference in the world.

Our guest for this episode is Greta Randolph, who is the Directional Leader of Outreach at Saint Paul's Baptist Church in Richmond, VA., also known as a "Church for People on the Grow!" As she reveals today, no matter how much you do, there is so much more to be done, and the need is tremendous. Like Greta, if you do good, good will continue to come. If you plant those seeds, you will see the tremendous impact that you can make on individuals, and your community as a whole.

We love to hear your feedback! If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message.

You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by viewing our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening! We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast, leave us a rating and review, and share with your friends. See you next week!

In this episode you'll hear:

• The impact that Greta is making through her work with Saint Paul's Baptist Church [5:23]
• An event the church recently held for Veterans that had a significant impact on the entire community [10:43]
• What she finds is driving up the needs for different charity programs at this time [15:10]
• How people can get more involved in their own communities and why it's so important to be doing this [18:02]
• The reasons that being of service to others matters so much to Greta personally [22:45]
• What she describes as the "trickle down effect" of doing good for others [26:28]
• Greta's tips and strategies for recharging as a busy professional [28:36]
• The powerful words that she lives by each day [30:49]

Links & Resources:

https://www.myspbc.org/

[email protected]

https://www.linkedin.com/in/greta-randolph-8a914827/

We often hear that it's important to live with gratitude, but with everything that is happening in our daily lives, how many of us actually stop to do this? As we're preparing to celebrate Thanksgiving here in the United States, we thought it would be timely to take a pause and reflect on what we're grateful for. We also reveal what the holiday means to us, and share some research that we've discovered on the benefits of a consistent gratitude practice.

We love to hear your feedback! If you have a question or topic that you'd like us to discuss in a future episode, please go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message. You can also reach us by email, [email protected], on social media at https://www.facebook.com/respectcircles and https://www.instagram.com/respectcircles/, or by viewing our website at www.respectcircles.com too. We look forward to hearing from you!

Thanks so much for listening! We'd love to have you subscribe to the podcast and leave us a rating and review. See you next week!

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why Thanksgiving is our favorite holiday, and the role gratitude plays in this celebration [3:31]
• A difficult experience that AJ had to go through last year on Thanksgiving Day, and how it gave him a whole new perspective on gratitude [9:25]
• The impact that gratitude can have on our lives, and why living a life of gratitude can be challenging for so many people [12:36]
• Stephanie's practices that help her focus on being grateful [15:27]
• A recent event in her life that makes her even more grateful about health, and the importance that good health has for everyone [16:22]
• AJ's gratitude practices and a simple gesture he did recently for someone that matters to him [21:26]
• An excellent resource for learning more about difficult cultures and the way that they celebrate and give thanks for their blessings [27:23]
• Action steps to take away from this episode that will put you on the path of living with more gratitude [29:38]

Links & Resources:

https://www.respectcircles.com/10-the-power-of-hope/

'Year 6!' Teen Who Was Accidentally Invited to 'Grandma's' Thanksgiving Keeps Tradition Going: https://people.com/human-interest/wanda-dench-and-jamal-hinton-keep-up-thanksgiving-tradition-year-6/

Taste the Nation with Padma Lakshmi: https://www.hulu.com/series/taste-the-nation-with-padma-lakshmi-53d48a66-d254-4e4f-89a1-277ec6c57368