Forgetful, or forgettable? Why is assisted dying so expensive? And how to test ashes. Pretending to have a speech impediment is not cool. But we’re not here to be cool.

Why is Greek fucked up? All we know is that buying a cat means never buying flowers. Until your cat dies. Our streets are not foot-friendly, but murder is an appropriate reply to chain mail.

Is a butt-plug a musical instrument? Does being a ghost require training? These questions and more are never answered. We’ll take your money.