Many people are in a position to give others advice.  Whether a parent, teacher, coach, or boss, but that doesn't mean we are always ready to receive this well-intended advice.  In fact, many times when people are offering advice, we are quick to turn them off.  We don't see it as giving advice as we might see it as meddling in our business.  We often can feel like well- meaning people can overstep their bounds and attempt to insert their ways in to our ways.  When we experience this we can feel annoyed to the point that we would rather them be quiet and let us do our own thing.  What's worse is when you begin to recognize a pattern in these advice-giving people.  Every time you are around them they always seem to have something they want to insert into your life.

I have developed a word for this type of person, USAGER.  Unsolicited Advice Giver!  I know it is not that creative, but it works for me.  The question that we tackle during this show is how do we handle the usagers in our life? We know from being teachers, coaches, and parents that people do not always want your advice.  However, if they ask for advice, they are now ready to receive it and the usefulness of it is so much more effective.  People must take in information when they are ready to process it for themselves. 

Usagers almost always act out of good intention, but when it comes at the wrong time it can often be even more damaging than helpful.  It can begin to break a relationship or the respect between two people. A common example might be a parent of an adult child that keeps trying to give advice to the adult child.  At some point, the adult child does not want the unsolicited advice and the relationship becomes strained. 

Setting boundaries on the usagers  in our lives is important for the relationship and protection of the value system that is personal to us. 

https://www.rocksolidfamilies.org/

Support the show

#Rocksolidfamilies, #familytherapy, #marriagecounseling, #parenting, #faithbasedcounseling, #counseling, #Strongdads, #coaching, #lifecoach, #lifecoaching, #marriagecoaching, #marriageandfamily, #control, #security, #respect, #affection, #love, #purpose, #faith, #affairs, #infidelity