Rodger That

Harry Macqueen trained as an actor at the Royal Central School of Speech and Drama, before turning to filmmaking in 2013. His acting credits include Richard Linklater's Me and Orson Welles and the hit British TV show Eastenders. Supernova is his second feature film as a writer-director.

“From the outset, my desire was to make an empowering, powerful, challenging, and timely film about what we are willing to do for the people that we love,” Harry says. 

Supernova stars Colin Firth and Stanley Tucci, as partners of twenty years, who are taking a road trip across England. Following a life-changing diagnosis, their time together has become more important than ever until secret plans test their love like never before.

“Supernova is the result of a lengthy and immersive research process. Over a three-year period, I worked closely with the U.K.’s leading dementia specialists at UCL and The Wellcome Trust and collaborated with many individuals and families affected by the condition,” Harry explains. “I have spent time with people who have since died both from dementia and suicide – in secret and in public – and seen the fallout from that first-hand.”

Through this process, Macqueen zeroed in on the exact condition Tucci’s character, Tusker, would be experiencing, and where we would meet him on his journey.

“He has what’s called Posterior Cortical Atrophy, or PCA,” Macqueen says. “That’s a young-onset type of dementia where people experience a progressive decline in vision and/or literacy skills, but often preserve their memory in early stages. Outwardly, Tusker’s life seems pretty normal most of the time, but inwardly he’s being slowly and absolutely unraveled by his condition.”

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Nurse, aged care expert, and Director of Montessori Consulting in Australia, Anne Keely has over 40-years’ experience in caring for dementia patients.

“I just happened about 13 years ago to stumble across a Montessori activities workshop that was being delivered by Dr Cameron Camp from the U.S. Halfway through that morning, the penny dropped. I thought, this is the aged care holy grail that I’ve been looking for,” Anne explains. “This is a way that we can honor, respect, and work with our elders, whilst not robbing them of independence and dignity.”

“I use the term dementia tai chi. You have to move with the dementia, flow with the dementia, and that means that they will do it their way and it's not an issue. You just work with it,” Anne says.

“It is just so amazing to see people maintaining independence and maintaining high self-esteem,” Anne states. “Having things to look forward to and things to do where they can contribute. This is really nontraditional dementia care.”

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Since 1983, Hank Dunn has been ministering to patients at the end of their lives and to their families. During that time, he has served in a nursing home, hospice programs, and a hospital, and become an expert on end-of-life decisions.

He wrote, “Hard Choices for Loving People” to help him explain end-of-life decisions to patients and families. First published in 1990, it is now in its 6th edition with over 3.5 million copies sold.

“Families who have taken care of their dementia-stricken loved ones have lost them inches at a time over the years,” Hank says. “It's a very hard decision for families and for cognitively intact patients... This is a big deal - it's a big emotional and spiritual issue as people start to let go.”

“There are basically four big decisions that a family faces toward the end of life for a dementia loved one. CPR, feeding tubes, hospitalization, and hospice care," Hank explains.

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For more than seven years our hosts, Bobbi and Mike Carducci, were the caregivers for Rodger, Mike’s ailing father who was stricken with dementia. With more patience and compassion than either thought possible, they cared for Rodger’s every need through to his final days.

Since then they have dedicated their lives to sharing their personal journey with this cruel disease. In today’s episode they share their insights into the challenges facing anyone caring for a loved one with dementia, Lewy Body, or any mental illness.

How do you know if you or a loved one might be in the first stages of dementia?

“When we're talking about devastating brain diseases, your brain controls every part of your body and it controls every function that you have.” Bobbi says, “So it's not just memory, it's hearing, it's sight, it's the sense of touch, it's your appetite, it's your balance, it's everything.”

“It's important that people understand what type of dementia the person has because that will affect the medications, some of their behaviors, and what type of care they need,” Mike explains.

“People with dementia have their appetite affected, so food no longer tastes good. One of the last flavors that people with dementia enjoy is sweet, and we often hear that all they want is junk food, cookies and cakes,” Bobbi adds. “So, you can cut their piece of chicken into small bites and put some maple syrup on. It won't kill them to have sweets and if that gets them to eat, that's what you want.”

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To find out more about Bobbi and Mike or the inspiration behind this podcast, Rodger That, head over to rodgerthat.show.

When Anne Scott, a mother of five children, was diagnosed with vascular brain lesions, multiple sclerosis, and fibromyalgia, her whole life changed and her twelve-year-old daughter, Evie, became her caregiver.

“I was in total shock. I came home, sat in my garden for a couple of hours 'cause I couldn't go in and tell the children. I just sat there for a while and cried,” Anne says about the day she was misdiagnosed with dementia. “I got myself together and then went in the house and told the children what I knew about it, which wasn't very much at that stage.”

“I know over here in Ireland that most doctors have like 7 hours training about dementia and that's not enough to cover all the illnesses, all the aspects, that they need to know. It is quite common for somebody to go in – especially if you're not getting a brain scan ­– and be misdiagnosed with dementia,” Anne explains.

Bobbi notes that there is a tendency for the medical profession to go with what they know, so if they see cognitive changes in an adult, they often go right to Alzheimer's or dementia. "The brain is tricky, and it can make it look like something else, so it is extremely difficult many, many, times to get the proper diagnosis,” Bobbi says.

“I wanted my children to fully understand and not to be scared, so I wrote my book, Sizzling Bacon. The book gives a lot of detail about the brain and how it works. I wanted people to understand what it's like for somebody with dementia, but to equally see what it's like for somebody who is a caregiver,” Anne says.

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To find out more about Bobbi and Mike or the inspiration behind this podcast, Rodger That, head over to rodgerthat.show.

Dr. Karen (Karle) Truman, founder of Dementia Caregiver Resources and author of the Dementia Caregiver’s Little Book of Hope talks about Huntington’s disease and finding resources for the caregiving journey.

Karen saw her own beloved mother, grandmother, and other relatives stricken with dementia but did not know what type they had. 

“When people talk about the difference between Alzheimer's and dementia, I tell them that saying you have dementia is like saying that you have a brain disease. You need to find out exactly what kind of disease you have so you know exactly how to fight it and what you might be passing along to your children,” Bobbi says.

“Huntington's is inherited, so if one parent has it, their children have a 50% chance of inheriting it,” Karen explains. “There's a lot of emotional pain associated with it - it is a wasting away basically of the body.”

“I had my mother’s brain autopsied and it was one of the best gifts I could have ever given to myself because now I know exactly what she had, I know it was just Alzheimer's,” Karen explains.

The Brain Bank collects brain and tissue samples from across the United States and distributes them to investigators all over the world. A brain donation is a gift of knowledge to all of us, and it is of critical importance for our understanding of brain disorders,

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To find out more about Bobbi and Mike or the inspiration behind this podcast, Rodger That, head over to rodgerthat.show.

Ariel Desheubel assists former Rodger That guest Bill Ralston with caring for his wife, Cindy, as she struggles with dementia. Ariel works Monday through Friday in their home, has a young son, and is in her early thirties.  

“It's not necessarily your age that makes you a good caregiver, it is your ability to connect with that person right now as they are,” Bobbi points out.

“We've made little transitions to where things are now easier for her, and it's not so challenging all the time,” Ariel says. “We changed how she eats, for example, because she was eating too fast and choking.  If you're eating something with the wrong object, it's a little bit harder to eat it. As she's trying to eat with it, it slows her down to where she has time to chew her portion.”

“My Grandfather always told me that if you do something you love every day, you will never work a day in your life. I truly, truly believe that because I enjoy every day. I get here early every day, and it makes me happy being here,” Ariel explains.

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To find out more about Bobbi and Mike or the inspiration behind this podcast, Rodger That, head over to rodgerthat.show.

Malia majored in journalism and embarked on a career as a TV producer and advertising copywriter. After years spent writing short ad copy, she realized she had more to say, so she co-wrote “Sisterly Shove," a memoir about stepping up when moms die and dads are left behind to get ancient on their own.

The book examines what happens when Malia’s mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and her dad developed dementia. Malia and her serious-as-a-heart-attack physician sister engaged in hand-to-heart combat in a 13-year battle to do what’s best for the parents who were always there for them. 

“We never thought ahead and that's another important thing to do before your parents become ill, more planning,” Malia says. “We should have looked at the fact that we're all in different parts of the country, and something inevitably is going to happen to our parents.”

“We could have avoided this 13 years of sisterly shove by talking to our parents when they were in their 60s about what they would want us to do if they got dementia, which runs in my father's family,” Malia explains.

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To find out more about Bobbi and Mike or the inspiration behind this podcast, Rodger That, head over to rodgerthat.show.

Annette Dashofy is the USA Today best-selling author of the multi Agatha Award nominated Zoe Chambers mystery series about a paramedic and deputy coroner in rural Pennsylvania’s tight-knit Vance Township. Annette also helped care for her father as he battled the ravages of Alzheimer’s. Less than ten years after he passed away, her mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia, placing her once again into the role of caregiver.   

“We really tried for as long as possible to keep her in her home until she started falling,” Anette explains. “She wanted to come back to her house, you know, but that wasn't an option.”

“Bobbi, your book - Confessions of an Imperfect Caregiver - got me through a lot of the rough patches. Just reading it, knowing that it’s OK, it is all right to feel guilty, made me feel better,” Annette says.

“In Zoe Chambers, I wanted to put my character Pete in the position of having to deal with Harry, his dad. And Harry gave me a chance to revisit the nicer memories of my dad. It was not that my dad was not a nice person, but I wanted Harry to be a character who was true to the illness and someone that my readers would want to spend an entire book with,” Anette explains.

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To find out more about Bobbi and Mike or the inspiration behind this podcast, Rodger That, head over to rodgerthat.show.

Ashley Raines is a wife, mother of a four-year-old boy, full-time employee for the division for Diversity and Inclusion at Missouri State University, and the primary caregiver for her father with mixed dementia.

“At first, before we really understood what we were getting into, it was really, really, difficult. It’s hard to understand what is dementia and what is him,” Ashley says.

“He frequently thinks I'm his wife, which gets extremely uncomfortable. He hates my husband especially when he thinks I'm his wife, “Ashley says.  “Which poses a lot of challenges for us choosing how to respond. When he thinks I'm his wife it gets challenging because I recognize that it's not his fault so it's like, Dad, I'm your daughter but that frequently doesn't register in his mind.  At some point I will message my brother and say, ‘Hey I need your help.’ He will come over, and I remove myself for a little bit, giving me separation. I can't take care of him if I can't take care of myself. I have to feel comfortable around him to be able to do that right.”

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To find out more about Bobbi and Mike or the inspiration behind this podcast, Rodger That, head over to rodgerthat.show.