Betrayal doesn’t just break trust, it breaks your inner compass. One day you’re functioning, the next you’re asking, “Am I healing or am I stuck?” and you can’t even tell which way is up. We sit down with Tammy Gustafson, therapist and betrayed partner, to get painfully clear about the predictable places women get stuck after infidelity, pornography use, and other sexual integrity breaches, and what actually helps you start moving again.

We dig into a distinction that can instantly reduce shame: your healing is not the same as his healing, and it’s not the same as relationship healing. When he’s not doing the work, the marriage may be stuck, but that doesn’t mean you are. From there we talk through the most common traps, including self-blame that targets your body or your sex life, the pressure to manage his emotions, and the power imbalance that makes “fairness” a misleading framework after betrayal trauma.

We also go straight at two faith-community hot buttons: forgiveness and anger. Tammy explains why “forgive and forget” can shut the process down, why forgiveness and trust come after truth and grief, and why anger, expressed safely, is often the doorway back to self-worth and strong boundaries. If you’ve been trying to be the “good wife” while your nervous system is screaming, you’ll feel seen here.

If this helps, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs language for what she’s going through, and leave a review so more betrayed partners can find support.

Links:

Website: https://tammygustafson.com

Book: Broken to Brave: Your Courageous Act of Healing After Intimate Betrayal

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

Redeeming Desire: Listening to the Ache and Meeting God There

In this episode, we discuss how desire has been distorted by both a culture that says to gratify it and religious voices that say to shut it down, and invite a more careful, redeemed view. 

Desire is described as a deep ache that tells the truth about what the heart longs for, not simply a problem to manage with pornography, fantasy, erotic literature, or even as a tool to prepare for sex in marriage. We are encouraged to approach desire with kind curiosity, notice shame or anger, and ask what the desire is communicating about intimacy with God and with others. 

We encourage you to share this with someone who may need it, and reach out with questions or for help engaging this topic.

Links: Rethinking Sexuality - Dr. Juli Slattery

Send a text

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

Ever notice how fantasy shows up right when you feel most alone? We get honest about why sexual fantasy feels comforting, why it keeps you stuck, and how to turn your mind from a private escape hatch into a place of healing and creativity. Without shaming or quick fixes, we walk through a simple “gift box” framework—unwrap, look inside, reach in—that helps you name the storyline, locate the deeper need for intimacy, and invite Jesus into the places that feel most secret.

We start by defining fantasy clearly and kindly, acknowledging the real needs it tries to soothe. Then we slow down together: What’s the setting of your go-to story? Who holds power? What does your body do as you approach it? With insights from Jay Stringer’s research on unwanted sexual behavior, we explore how fantasy often attempts to reverse or reinforce old wounds, and why grieving those wounds loosens fantasy’s grip. Along the way, we distinguish reactive fantasy from creative imagination, and we practice turning imagination toward goodness and beauty.

If your heart wants connection more than escape, this conversation offers a kind map back to intimacy, wholeness, and holy imagination. Press play, try the steps, and if you’re ready for support, reach out—we’d love to sit with you in the sacred space of being known. If this resonated, subscribe, share with a friend who needs hope, and leave a review so more people can find their way from secrecy to healing.

Resources:

Janice McWilliams - Restore My Soul

Jay Stringer - Unwanted

Sexual Behavior Assessment 

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

If betrayal made you feel small, doubtful, or invisible, this conversation offers language, tools, and hope. We sit down with Kat Etherington, Director for Recovery at the Naked Truth Project, to unpack what shame actually is, why it often predates a relationship crisis, and how to begin healing without rushing yourself into more pain. Kat brings rare clarity from both sides of the work—as a betrayed partner and as someone in long-term recovery from addiction—showing how shame can be both a sudden feeling and a deep identity wound formed in early attachment.

If this resonated, follow the show, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help more listeners find safe, honest conversations like this.

Resources from this episode:

nakedtruthproject.com

Support for Users - Naked Truth Project

Support for Partners and Spouses - Naked Truth Project

Restored2More Marriage Recovery Group

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

Intimacy shouldn’t feel like a test you can fail. We open a gentler way to relate to Jesus—one built on safety, honesty, and trust—so that even those carrying unwanted sexual desires, betrayal, trauma, or unanswered prayers can step toward connection without pressure or performance. Rather than chasing a perfect quiet time, we explore how everyday moments become holy ground: the clink of dishes, a commute’s quiet, the light on autumn leaves. When we treat intimacy as presence instead of a project, our nervous systems can exhale and our desire has room to grow.

We share language that removes shame and invites realism: Can I be honest with you, Lord? Do I feel safe with you, Lord? Can I trust you, God? That pause between question and answer matters. Scripture reframes God’s posture—the Lord who sees, the face that shines, Jesus, gentle and lowly—and helps us imagine a relationship that meets us where we actually are. We talk about cultivating a listening heart, the biblical picture of wisdom that stays connected moment by moment, and we borrow lived practices from Brother Lawrence to a modern “Experiencing God” approach that treats the day like an ocean you can hear, watch, or dive into.

If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs gentleness today, and leave a review to help others find these conversations.

Resources from this episode:

• Practice the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence
• John Eldredge - The One Minute Pause App

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

What if the thing you fear—letting people in—is the very thing that heals you fastest? We open up about why isolation intensifies shame, why “being right” without being known leaves you empty, and how a few safe relationships can anchor recovery, restore trust after betrayal, and steady your identity when everything feels uncertain.

We get practical about building community that actually helps. You’ll learn how to test for safety with small disclosures, look for integrity and honesty over warm fuzzies, and invite people who can play three vital roles: mirror (reflect what’s true), flashlight (illuminate options), and sandpaper (gently refine). We unpack rhythms that make connection feel secure—a standing coffee, a weekly check-in—and how prayer sharpens discernment so you can sense who’s trustworthy. 

If you’ve been hurt by community, we name that grief and show how to re-enter wisely. Needs change across seasons; circles shift; God still provides the right companions for the chapter you’re in. We talk about interrupting addictive spirals with one simple text, why listening can heal more than advice, and how Jesus’ withness reframes everything—because love doesn’t demand you swim the ocean alone. You don’t need twenty people to begin. You need one safe person and a baby step.

If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs hope, and leave a review to help others find conversations that lead to real healing.

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

Memory can feel like a trap… until it becomes a path back to wholeness. We chose remember as our word for the year, not to force a walk through old pain, but to gently re-member the parts of ourselves that splintered under grief, betrayal, and shame. Together we ask better questions, listen to what our bodies are telling us, and trust that God is already meeting us in the details we often overlook.

Press play if you’re ready to move from avoidance to gentle restoration and hear the song that’s already being sung over your life. If this helped you breathe easier, subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review to help more people find the show.

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

Singleness often exists in the shadows of our cultural conversation, especially in faith communities where marriage is frequently celebrated as the ultimate destination. But what if your life's unexpected path includes long-term singleness? How do you navigate sexuality, loneliness, and purpose when the "happily ever after" narrative hasn't materialized as planned?

Connelly Gillum, author of "Revelations of a Single Woman: Loving the Life I Didn't Expect," brings refreshing honesty to this conversation as she shares her journey through decades of singleness. After a relationship ended in her early 40s, Connelly faced what she believed might be the "consummate tragedy" of permanent singleness. Yet nearly twenty years later, she's discovered surprising fullness, purpose, and joy—not despite her singleness, but partially because of it.

The conversation doesn't shy away from difficult truths. Connelly candidly discusses how cultural messages about sexuality created a persistent wrestling match with God, leading her to suspect He might be "holding out" on her. The breakthrough came not through denying her sexuality or desires, but through reframing them as opportunities for self-giving rather than self-fulfillment. From supporting family during crisis to discovering the joys of hospitality, Connelly reveals how her singleness has allowed her unique ways to reflect Christ to those around her.

For singles beyond the typical ministry demographic of under-30, Connelly offers particularly valuable wisdom about grief and purpose. She emphasizes that acknowledging the genuine suffering of unsought singleness isn't wallowing—it's essential healing work that eventually leads to freedom. And her closing thoughts about how "God sets the lonely in families" provide hope for building meaningful connections beyond traditional family structures.

Whether you're single, supporting someone who is, or simply interested in a deeper understanding of singleness, this conversation will challenge assumptions and offer a fresh perspective on embracing the life you didn't expect.

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

“Sometimes Sunday is the loneliest hour of my week.” 

That confession lit a fuse. 

We open up about singleness, sexual desire, and belonging in the church, and why treating marriage as the finish line keeps too many people stuck on the fringes. In this episode, we explore the quiet messages singles hear, the subtle social silos that form, and the deeper invitation God offers to all of us: a life of obedience, intimacy, and joy right where we are.

If you’ve ever felt unseen in the pews or pressured to treat wholeness like a ticket to marriage, this conversation offers a better story. 

Subscribe, share with a friend who needs this, and leave a review to help more people find the show. 

What part challenged you most?

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)

Join us for the final week of our special mini-series on Advent. If you missed the previous episodes, we explored the intersections of Mary's yes and our sexual struggle, and the importance of finding connection and community. Today, we dive into Mary's song, reading Luke 1:46-55, and reflecting on how it speaks to us in this season. Listen as we personalize these lyrics to find our own song and discover the joy in knowing that God notices and remembers us. Don't miss this heartwarming and inspiring episode filled with reflections on God's mercy and the ripple effects of our actions.

Send us Fan Mail

You’re invited to Regeneration’s Annual Dessert Fundraiser on Thursday, March 19, at 6:00 PM at Martins Valley Mansion. Join us for an encouraging evening of real stories and renewed hope as we celebrate how Christ is bringing healing and restoration in our city. Dessert is provided, and seating is limited. Learn more, register, or host a table RSVP

Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at [email protected]

Free Resources for you!

👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)