By JJs Hello Foundation
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The podcast currently has 25 episodes available.
1. We don’t want you to fix us. We want you to listen.
2. Mental health isn’t a phase that we are going to snap out of. Trust us when we say we need
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1. I feel so guilty for hurting you and being a “problem.”
I’ve seen the pain on your face. I know I’ve hurt you, and I know I’ve caused you extra work and stress. I sometimes feel guilty and selfish for being depressed. Just remind me you love me and that even if I create extra problems for you, I’m worth it.
2. Sometimes I don’t know what’s wrong.
Feeling down can come on whenever — it’s unpredictable. I don’t always know what causes it, and if I don’t know how am I supposed to tell you? Please stop asking me to try and figure it out.
3. Don’t try to fix all my problems for me.
I know I have problems, but it’s a victory when I overcome them. You can help me if I ask, and hug me when those problems get to be too much, but no one can fix another person’s problems. I need to be able to do that myself. Just be there for me.
4. Other teens can be cruel.
Whether they don’t understand my depression or they just don’t care, when they exclude or bully me it hurts. Be the person I can run to and who will love me no matter what.
5. Don’t be ashamed of my depression and try to hide it from the rest of the family
Yes, I have depression. Don’t try to hide it from the family. No family is perfect, and when you try to hide my depression you’re telling me this is something I should be ashamed of. Depression is a mental illness. You don’t hide it when I have the flu, so don’t hide it when I have a “mental flu.”
6. Sometimes I fake being sick because I feel mentally unwell and I’m afraid you won’t understand.
When I’m feeling down I don’t want to go to school or do other social activities. I’m hurting too much inside to try being happy while trying not to have a breakdown in public. The best thing for me is talking to someone who will listen, or doing a fun activity that doesn’t involve being around a lot of other people.
7. I get mad at myself for not having the energy and motivation to do the things you want me to do.
Doing certain activities and chores takes a lot more concentration and motivation when I’m dealing with depression. Things that used to be simple and fun now take a lot of energy and more time. When I know I have a lot to get done, it stresses me out and makes me feel more down.
8. Don’t ask me what I talked about with my counselor.
It’s important to be able to talk to someone outside of our family and my social life. Don’t be offended when I don’t talk to you and talk to a counselor instead. Family and parents play a big part in my life, so I need to talk to someone else about those things. There’s a reason the sessions are private.
9. When I need breaks from family, please don’t be offended.
Like any relationship, families are hard work. Being around them every day can get challenging. Having breaks, like a few days away, gives me some peace. I don’t love you any less, but if stuff is stressful at home things start to build up. Having a short time away gives me time to clear my head and think things over.
10. Depression comes and goes. If I seem happy, it might not mean I’m “better.”
Some days are better than others, so even when I seem happy, be there for me.
In today's episode, I will read a letter written following the loss of our son JJ to suicide.
A letter from a father and suicide survivor
JJ was my first child. He wasn’t your typical 12 year old. He was smart, energetic, goofy. A straight-A student who was heavily involved in school activities being in school leadership, involved in school dances and assemblies. He was an avid soccer and video game player. JJ had a large circle of friends and was the one that everyone came to with a problem because not only would he fix it but he wouldn’t let you leave the room until you smiled. From the outside looking in, JJ was happy.
On February 13th, 2016 everything we knew about JJ changed. My son JJ, my only son, my junior became another statistic of youth suicide. After his passing, once the funeral was done and family and friends had gone back to their routines I sat down at the computer to try and understand how we missed the signs and how bad this epidemic of youth suicide was. I was astonished to find out not only that suicide is the second leading cause of death ages 10-24, but that suicide takes the lives of more of our youth than every natural cause of death combined.
With the right education and the continual awareness of our teachers, parents, our children and their peer’s suicide can be prevented. JJ’s Hello Foundations mission is to prevent youth suicide, promote youth mental health awareness, and create a message of hope for pre-teens, teens, and young adults in our community. JJ's Hello Foundation and his family hope that such activities and training will raise awareness about suicide, erase the stigmas associated with suicide discussion so that teens and young adults who are in crisis will not turn to suicide as the only answer, and that friends, families, teachers and the community at large will recognize the signs and get them help before it’s too late.
I will never hear my son’s voice again or pick him up when he falls but I have made it my mission to stand by your side and make sure together no other father loses their son or daughter to suicide. Together we can save young lives who knows maybe even yours, your friends, your neighbors, or a complete stranger’s child from making my son’s tragic choice.
Please consider a donation to JJ’s Hello Foundation. And always remember to the world you may be one person, but to one person you are the world.
Please like our page and share to help us spread the message of prevention.
Learn more http://www.hellofund.org/donations
Josh Anderson
President
JJ’s Hello Foundation
1. Understand the Treatment Plan
2. Avoid Unhelpful Reactions
3. Handle Your Teen’s School
4. Keep Your House Safe
5. Encourage Healthy Lifestyle Choices
6. Warning Signs of Another Teen Suicide Attempt
7. Get Counseling for Yourself
We hope you found this information helpful. If you need more information about teenage depression, suicide or suicide loss please visit www.hellofund.org to learn more.
Remember to the world you may be one person but to one person you are the world. Thank you.
How to help themselves
1. Asking for help when dealing with a mental health issue is a sign of strength.
2. Living a healthy lifestyle helps keep your mind balanced.
3. You have power.
4. There are tons of different coping skills for managing mental health.
5. Surrounding yourself with people that are healthy for you makes the recovery process smoother.
How to help others
1. Teens struggling with mental health issues are often misunderstood by peers.
2. Spreading awareness reduces stigma.
3. Your friend may be feeling emotions that prevent them from talking to you.
4. Your support consistency really helps the person who is experiencing a mental health issue.
5. Leading a positive life can be contagious.
to the world, you may be one person but to one person you are the world.
Here are four things to keep in mind when having that ‘how-you-doing?’ conversation with your teen and to show that you are always there for them.
1. Encourage them to share their feelings
2. Take the time to support them
3. Work through conflict together
4. Care for yourself
Key Points to think about when discussing teenage anxiety
Why don’t men talk about mental health?
Societal expectations and traditional gender roles play a role in why men are less likely to discuss or seek help for their mental health problems. We know that gender stereotypes about women – the idea they should behave or look a certain way, for example – can be damaging to them. But it’s important to understand that men can be damaged by stereotypes and expectations too.
Men are often expected to be the breadwinners and to be strong, dominant, and in control. While these aren’t inherently bad things, they can make it harder for men to reach out for help and open up.
Men’s mental health and suicide…
Men are three times as many men as women die by suicide.
If you or someone you know is in a crisis, get help immediately. You can call 911 or the National Suicide Prevention Line at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
I know I know it's been a while but we are back and look forward to talking to you all more.
May 25th we will be presenting the Smedberg Leadership award to 11 deserving middle school students
May 26th JJ would be graduating from Sheldon High School Class of 2021
My own mental health struggles and how I need to do better for myself and for everyone around me.
The podcast currently has 25 episodes available.