Second Breaks

EPISODE SUMMARY:

This week's guest is Bernie Borges, Producer and Host of the Midlife Fulfilled podcast. Bernie shares his perspective on what (and when!) midlife is — which is quite non-traditional, bordering on controversial! I expect it will generate some reactions, no doubt. I’m also sharing my own thoughts and definition of midlife. Although not dissimilar from Bernie’s, it has minor differences.

It’s important that we adopt a broader definition of midlife because how we view midlife has significant implications on how we live the second half of our lives.

ABOUT MY GUEST, BERNIE BORGES:
In addition to producing and hosting the Midlife Fulfilled podcast, Bernie is Vice President, Global Content Marketing at iQor, a leading BPO. He’s an Advisory Board member at Vengreso and at the University of South Florida Digital Marketing Certification Program. Bernie resides in Florida with his wife Jean. They're empty nesters with two adult children living up north. Bernie's favorite title is "abuelo" which is what his grandson calls him.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Bernie’s perspective on what midlife is and isn’t
• We talked about the benefits of thinking broadly about midlife seasons.
• The importance of taking a broader perspective on how we define midlife
• We discussed the difference between happiness and fulfillment
• Bernie shares his observations about midlife fulfillment, from interviews from his podcast

Footnotes:

• Follow Bernie Borges on LinkedIn
• Check out his podcast, Midlife Fulfilled
• What is Midlife? Who is in Midlife?
• The episode on Midlife Fulfilled, where I joined Bernie to share my story

Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn.

Subscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living in midlife.

In the season opener, Lou Blaser makes the case that midlife is a call to action for change. This is a two-parter conversation, and in this episode, Lou talks about why midlife change is necessary and inevitable and why this change is certainly not a crisis.

You can read the full text of this episode here. 

Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn.

Subscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living in midlife. 

In this bonus episode, I share my plans and goals for the podcast for the year.

FOOTNOTES:

Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn.

Subscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living in midlife. 

Contrary to popular opinion, wisdom does not come with age.

It is the act of sitting down and reflecting on our own experiences that creates wisdom.

And one powerful exercise we can do to capture that wisdom is to reflect on the lessons we're taking away from our experiences in the past year.

Before you get too busy with your 2023 goals and plans, take a pause to consider the lessons you learned from last year. A slight variation to this is to ask what you learned ABOUT yourself last year.

In this bonus episode, I share the five lessons I learned and am taking with me into the new year.

Footnotes:

Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn.

Subscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living in midlife. 

Have you ever looked back and considered how different you are today from the 20-year-old version of yourself?

This is a question that I ask all my guests on the podcast. And I’m always blown away by the thoughtfulness of their answers.

In this short bonus episode, I’ve compiled the responses of my guests this year so you can listen to all of their thoughts back to back.

I’ve found myself in their words. I’ve found so much strength and inspiration as well.

And I think you’ll feel the same way.

Oh, and I’ll share my own answer to this question as well.

Footnotes:

Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn.

Subscribe to Midlife Cues, the newsletter about intentional living in midlife.

Many of us conduct some kind of a year-end review process sometime in December.

My process has evolved a lot over the years, but I’ve been sitting down to do an annual review religiously since my corporate years.

I’m always looking for ways to keep my process relevant to wherever I am in life. I also work to spice it up so things don’t get boring and I can look forward to the exercise toward the end of December.

During the last few years, I’ve picked up a handful of new questions that aren’t the usual kind you frequently hear about. And these have added a new dimension to my assessment of how my year went.

If your year-end review process has gotten stale or a bit ho-hum,  consider adding these to change things up.

For the written version of this episode and all the links, head on over to http://secondbreaks.com

A singular event rarely transforms a person. True transformation occurs over time and usually, after a series of events that shakes one's world view.

ABOUT MY GUEST:
Vivek Chakrabortty is the CEO and Founder of The Kavi Group, a crisis management and business continuity consulting firm that supports some of the largest firms in the world today. He is a husband and a father to 3 young adults. You’ll hear him say later that home is wherever his family is, so let me just say, today, he and his family reside in Florida.
 
IN THIS EPISODE:

• How Vivek slowly but surely, discarded the rule books and constructs that he had previously lived his life by;
• The philosophies — or his North and South stars — that guide his work and life;
• How these philosophies show up in his work and his parenting style;
• What he views as his responsibility is to his employees;
• How his ambition expresses itself today (versus how it was 20 years ago).

For all the links and show notes, head on over to http://secondbreaks.com

I’ve come to regard midlife as a kind of fresh start or rather, we can choose to approach it as a fresh start.

This is a time in our lives when we can pause and really review where we are and think about how we want the second half of our lives to work out, and then really refocus our energy toward that. For many of us, that means choosing to change areas of our life.

Sadly, as much as the vision of our future can be exciting, many of us would rather look away from that vision because we’re not willing to go through the pain of rocking our world as it exists today.

In this episode, I bring you the story of Lori Saitz who did not look away and went through a major life makeover of her own making.

ABOUT MY GUEST:
Lori Saitz is the Founder of Zen Rabbit and host of the podcast “Fine is a 4-Letter Word.” She’s an award-winning writer, speaker, and broadcaster. She guides business professionals who are finished living in a dumpster fire, to a place of unprecedented clarity, peace, and productivity. Using a collaborative approach, she teaches people to be grounded and centered, which leads to improved relationships, increased sales, and better overall health.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Why Lori says “fine” is a 4-letter word.
• The thing about commiserating with friends.
• Why our friends may not always like the changes we’re making in our lives.
• The question we should really stop asking others.
• And how to respond when we do get asked that question!

For all the links and show notes, head on over to http://secondbreaks.com

We've all avoided having an important conversation because of fear. 

Often, we do so because we don’t have the tools — we don’t know where and how to begin. We don’t have the words or the vocabulary to discuss an important topic. Sometimes, it’s because we’ve been burned in the past when a difficult conversation went awry.

I also feel like the older I get, the need to have these difficult or sensitive conversations aren’t decreasing. They feel like they’re multiplying!

And just because we’re older doesn’t mean we’ve mastered the art of conducting difficult conversations. Sure, we have loads of experience under our belt. And some of us really have done massive work on this and have some tools to help navigate the fear in difficult conversations.

But we can always use more tools in this space.

ABOUT MY GUEST: 

Nancy Burger is a communications strategist and coach who guides executives and teams to foster emotionally healthy cultures. A certified leadership coach, author, and seasoned researcher, Nancy brings her 10+ years of communications expertise and research in psychology to elevate workplace connections. Nancy also delivers workshops and talks to universities, leadership organizations, and networking groups, all with the aim of cultivating clear, effective, and productive communication dynamics.

In this episode, Nancy and I peel back the curtain and explore the challenge many of us face when having difficult conversations.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• How fear complicates difficult conversations
• Why we don’t always catch the fear-based thoughts that are driving our decisions and actions
• Setting the expectations of ourselves going into sensitive conversations
• How to prepare for these sensitive conversations

For all the links and show notes, head on over to http://secondbreaks.com

While I have pursued many “big” projects and taken on risks head-on, there are still many things that I hold myself back from because of fear. Sometimes, it’s because I don’t feel ready. The worst is when I hesitate because “who do I think I am that I could pull this thing off?”

Recently, a good friend did one of these challenging public-facing projects. I had front-row seats and witnessed her move from idea to full execution and was so impressed that I asked her to chat about it when it was over

I wanted to learn from her experience, not so much the technical “how did you do it”. Rather, it was more about the mental and emotional “how did you do it” aspects of it.

If there’s a project you’re thinking of undertaking and you’re somewhat paralyzed with fear or wondering if you have what it takes or why in the world you even think you can do it, this episode is for you.

ABOUT MY GUEST:

Yvonne Marchese is a photographer and the host of the Late Bloomer Living Podcast. Early this year, she hosted the Midlife Uprising Summit – a gathering of women committed to busting through their Midlife Funk and rocking the next chapter of life.

The summit consisted of 30 speakers and was attended by over 300 participants. Today, she has transitioned that initial gathering to a community of midlife women who continue to inspire and cheer each other on, share stories and take bold action together.

In this conversation, Yvonne and I deconstructed her experience – from the initial seed of an idea to the finish line. We talked about some of the challenges she faced, where and how she got support, and some of her lessons learned.

For all the links and show notes, head on over to http://secondbreaks.com