Sex, Lies & Parenthood

We are working on Season 2 but in the mean time, we have a couple of interviews we are posting that are PHENOMENAL. We had the pleasure to speak to Mal Harrison, a clinical sexologist with the Center for Erotic Intelligence, all about the clitoris and pleasure. So many people don’t know much about what their bodies are made of and how the parts work, even as adults. There is nothing to be ashamed of in not knowing but knowledge is power, especially when you put it to use! This was a fun and informational conversation and I hope you all enjoy it as much as we did.

Go to www.MalHarrison.com to find out more about her

If you want more information on the center go to https://centerforeroticintelligence.org

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I was late to the school pick-up line aka on time. I had a panic attack, but how did my kids react? Not like I was expecting at all.

My husband was doing the dishes this morning despite his PTSD from when he was punished as a child (check out previous episode) and I am so proud of him.

Then we discuss are you an opener a closer or both when it comes to the kitchen?

We also discuss how neither of us is the boss over the other but has that lead us to being lackadaisical when it comes to chores?

We discuss how much we hate adulting – who said being an adult means cleaning all of the time and doing projects? (This is turning into an ongoing theme, maybe one day we’ll do something about it).

My husband says we are lazy, I say we are prioritizing down time instead of cleaning aka doing the bare minimum to survive. I discuss why my ADHD is a hindrance when it comes to cleaning the house.

Then we get the wheel out and the question causes me to be fully honest about something I have hidden from my husband in the past. We also rehash one of the worst nights of my life – our bachelor/bachelorette parties and the strip club scam. Then my husband tells me how he knows when I am lying but reveals he never lies except when I ask him this over the phone. Plus we discuss how project timelines are meaningless for my husband because he thinks everything will be done “in a day” but it never is.

Then of course we get back on the subject of cleaning but my husband says something that made me so happy, then, in the next breath, pissed me off when he tried to joke about my cooking. And we close it out discussing farts and what would cause a divorce if we did THIS to one another.

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We begin this episode with the age-old problem, my husband won’t turn on the air conditioning and I am sweating. Why is there always one spouse that holds on to the last second in the summer?! The good news is we both hate cuddling when we are hot and sweaty so there’s that to look forward to later. Then wait until you hear who changed my Apple ID password and what they charged! WTF?! Then my husband explains why he watches porn on “private mode” and I learn for the first time that even exists. Then we discuss what daily activity I do that makes me feel like a failure. Finally we spin the wheel and have a very serious question from a mom whose child has revealed something HUGE and she isn’t sure how to handle it.

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I asked our 10-year-old son Nico about his secret girlfriend that everyone knew about except me. I bribed him with Nutella and did it before I had to drop him off at school, I figured some sugar and limited time would get him to tell me quickly. His response was priceless and I hope I am showing him that I want to keep the line of communication open without judgement. I am not great at this parenting thing, I think I thought a magical switch would turn on and I would just be the perfect parent, nope. Just like a marriage takes work every day, so does parenting; some days are better than others and, at this point we are living one day at a time. In this episode we discuss what our son finally admitted to me about the girlfriend AND what he wants to do next, spoiler alert, he wants us to meet her! That is a little too real for us right now and I am not sure where to go with that request; I told him it was something we can discuss further in the future. Yes, supposedly her parents know about him and she is allowed to have a boyfriend which makes me feel a little bit better about the situation. Also in this episode, we discuss what the older boys tried to discuss with Capricorn during puberty that actually made him VERY uncomfortable.

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I recently noticed a change in our 10 year old son’s behavior, showering without us making him, cleaning his room without us nagging, doing chores without us asking. I was scared he was either body snatched or I woke up in a different dimension. Did he want money? Yes. Did he eat all of the ice scream and get scared I would be pissed so he was trying to soften the blow? Yes. BUT the worst thing of all…he has a secret girlfriend! I found out when I did a cell phone check and I saw texts to a contact he labelled “my best friend.” They text “luv u” which is insane to me. The only thing is, I am the ONLY one who didn’t know about it. My husband even knew! In this episode I confront my husband to find out why he didn’t tell me AND I decide whether to confront our son about it as well or wait for him to come tell me on his own. Later in the episode we talk about the story I teased in episode 26, a story we never aired. I discuss why it never aired and finally tell the damn story. We also discuss what makes our marriage work for us right now and give advice for those people struggling in their relationship. 

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In this episode we let you know what happened AFTER we taped episode 25, the roadie episode…what a cliffhanger…and then we recap what we’ve been doing since the road trip and why we haven’t posted content for a bit. Spoiler alert, the hospital was involved but wait until you hear WHY; I am so screwed. ALSO, we are happy to announce you can find us on YouTube. We have added a video component but, because of their rules, it is a very edited, cleaner version of the podcast. I like the podcast audio version better, we can be ourselves and you don’t have to see my flat boobs and my stomach rolls. Podcast audio version for the win! I am so much hotter on audio.

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I know it sounds dramatic but we legit got into a heated discussion and I seriously wasn’t sure what was going to happen after…My husband was salty with me the night before and I finally figured out why, because I hadn’t given him a roadie yet. OMG he was really in his feelings and really let me have it. I fell into a TikTok hole while we were driving in the middle of nowhere on the way to a hotel. I was scared and not feeling sexy but he was hoping I would have paid more attention to the fact that we were alone on a dark road, the perfect opportunity for a roadie. I, however, was waiting for “The Walking Dead” music to come on and praying we had no car issues. Literally we were in the middle of NOWHERE! Yes, I get it, I missed an opportunity. Did I apologize? Yes. I did feel bad for not coming through when I had the chance. Will my TikTok addiction destroy our marriage? We get very real in this episode and you pretty much hear us fight and work it out (finger crossed) in real time. How did we do?

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We’ve been driving for 3 days already and finally decided to record a couple of episodes because why haven’t we been this whole time? I’m a procrastinator and figured we had days to go but that time went quicker than anticipated so this is the best we could do. It has also taken me a week to edit the content so, there’s that too. Love you all for sticking with us! In this episode, you can clearly hear how tired and bored we are on this part of the drive (Kansas on). We discuss that time Capricorn moved to Florida (or as I say Fla-rid-uh), wait until you hear WHY he made the move. We also discuss how we picked up a couple of college kids that didn’t know each other along our hike in Arizona and how I am convinced they are dating right now but have no way to find out…I am considering turning to social media to see if anyone knows them (we all took a selfie and then disappeared). We discuss road trip foods we HAD to have. Capricorn makes me nuts during this episode as he insisted on chewing sunflower seeds right as we began recording. If they annoy you as much as they annoyed me, I tell him to stop chewing them at 15:30. HEADS UP: Then we get into a homeowner beware conversation when it comes to hiring a contractor for a project. Contractors and homeowners…do you agree with us? Capricorn wanted you all to know this episode took a turn away from the usual topics, I say it goes under “lies.”

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In this episode we are leaving LA with our car (finally) on our way to Arizona for a few days. I asked questions we probably should have asked BEFORE we got married. You’ve seen those lists right? I thought it would be fun for us to answer some thought-provoking questions. The lesson? Don’t ask anything you don’t really want the answer to. Listen to Capricorn go from calling me “powerful” to “nagging” in less than 30 seconds. Every time I think I know everything about my husband, there is ALWAYS something new he adds to the pot.

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In this episode we discuss how I am NOT the sleepover mom. Our home is always under construction and I don’t like other people’s kids, no, that’s actually not true, sometimes I like them more than my own, but I still don’t want them sleeping over. Does that make me the meanest mom ever? Yes, according to my kids I am the worst. Well we discuss that in this episode, is our bad parenting causing our kids to be sassy or are our sassy kids causing us to be in a bad mood and parent with a little too much negative emotion? It’s a chicken before the egg kind of question (or is it?). Regardless, we are not alone…we spin the wheel and answer a listener’s question about their sassy kid. We discuss what we could do to be better parents and ultimately realize we can’t help the listener because our kids are just as bad. Hey, at least we know we are all in this together.

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