Shedding the Shame

In this episode of Shedding the Shame, Tami sits down with her friend and former coworker, Jenna Van Dusen, for an honest conversation about living with Type 1 Diabetes.

Diagnosed at just two and a half years old, Jenna shares what it was like growing up constantly managing a life-threatening chronic illness while also carrying the emotional weight, stigma, and shame that often comes with it. From childhood memories of blood sugar crashes at school to navigating work, relationships, burnout, and the pressure to appear “low maintenance,” Jenna opens up about the realities most people never see.

Together, Tami and Jenna discuss:

• The difference between Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes
• The mental and emotional toll of chronic illness
• Shame, stigma, and harmful cultural jokes about diabetes
• The pressure to over-perform professionally while managing illness
• How wearable medical devices changed Jenna’s life
• The fear of being perceived as “different”
• The invisible emotional weight of chronic disease
• Learning to ask for help and let go of perfectionism
• Why speaking openly about chronic illness matters

This episode is a powerful reminder that many people are carrying battles we cannot see and that empathy matters more than judgment.

If you’ve ever struggled with shame, chronic illness, feeling different, or trying to hold it all together while appearing “fine,” this conversation will resonate deeply.

You are not alone.

You can connect with Jenna on LinkedIn here:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenna-l-van-dusen/

Penny’s story doesn’t start with an eating disorder.

It starts with a little girl who felt different: clumsy, quiet, and out of place.She didn't understand body image, shame had already taken root.

In this episode, Penny shares how early experiences- feeling uncoordinated, misunderstood, and later undiagnosed ADHD- shaped the way she saw herself. By 13, she turned to food restriction and over-exercise as a way to cope, long before she had the language to understand what was happening.

We talk about:

• How body shame can start before we even recognize it
• The link between ADHD, rejection sensitivity, and self-worth
• The dangerous praise of “looking healthy”
• Bodybuilding, control, and the illusion of perfection
• Why eating disorders are often missed—especially in kids
• What it actually takes to start healing

Penny also shares how becoming a mother shifted everything, and how she’s now using her experience to help parents recognize the early signs of eating disorders through her non-profit, ReFrame Voices.

This is a conversation about what we carry in our bodies, what we were never taught to understand, and how we begin to let it go.

⚠️ Content warning: Eating disorders, body shame, mental health

Resources:

Reframe Voices website: https://www.reframevoices.ca/

Reframe Voices IG: https://www.instagram.com/reframevoices/

Canada

• National Eating Disorder Information Centre- https://nedic.ca/
  Helpline: 1-866-NEDIC-20 (1-866-633-4220)
  Offers live chat, referrals, and educational resources.
• Canadian Mental Health Association- https://cmha.ca/
  General mental health support, including body image and BDD-related resources.

U.S.

• National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA)- https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/
  Helpline: (800) 931-2237
  Offers screening tools, treatment referrals, and support resources.
• National Alliance for Eating Disorders- https://www.allianceforeatingdisorders.com/
  Provides free support groups, referrals, and education.

UK

• Beat Eating Disorders- https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/
  Helpline: 0808 801 0677
  Youthline: 0808 801 0711
  Offers support for individuals and families, plus online chat.

Australia

• Butterfly Foundation- https://butterfly.org.au/
  Helpline: 1800 33 4673
  National support for eating disorders and body image issues.
• National Eating Disorders Collaboration- https://nedc.com.au/
  Provides education, research, and treatment pathways.

Ruth’s story starts at five years old; watching her father abuse her mother.

Years later, she found herself in a relationship that looked painfully familiar.

In this episode, Ruth shares her journey through domestic violence, the reality of being a young bride and mother, and the moment everything changed; the moment she knew she had to run.

We talk about the parts people don’t always understand:

• The fear
• The manipulation
• The moments of “good” that keep you holding on
• The strength it takes to finally leave

Ruth also shares what came after: raising her daughters on her own, healing from deep trauma, and learning how to take her power back.

This is a conversation about survival, resilience, and what it means to choose yourself, even when it’s the hardest thing you’ll ever do.

⚠️ Content warning: Domestic violence, abuse.

If you or someone you know is experiencing abuse, support is available. You are not alone. Leaving isn’t simple. It isn’t quick, and it can be dangerous.

Support exists. Safe people exist. Options exist.

You deserve safety. You deserve peace. You deserve a life that isn’t built around fear.

Support Resoures

• National Domestic Violence Hotline
  Call: 1-800-799-7233
  Text: START to 88788
  Live chat available online (24/7, confidential)
• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
  Call or text: 988 (24/7 support for emotional distress)
• Love Is Respect (for teens & young adults)
  Call: 1-866-331-9474
  Text: LOVEIS to 22522

• VictimLink BC (if you’re in British Columbia)
  Call or text: 1-800-563-0808 (24/7, multilingual)
• ShelterSafe Canada
  Online directory to find shelters across the country
• Kids Help Phone (youth & young adults)
  Call: 1-800-668-6868
  Text: CONNECT to 686868
• 988 Suicide Crisis Helpline (Canada-wide)
  Call or text: 988

• National Domestic Abuse Helpline
  Call: 0808 2000 247 (24/7, free & confidential)
• Samaritans (emotional support)
  Call: 116 123 (24/7)

In this solo episode of Shedding the Shame, Tami shares her deeply personal 30-year journey with alopecia.

Her story began at just 15 years old after taking Accutane, when she first noticed changes in her hair that would continue for decades. What followed was a long and often isolating experience of thinning hair, shame, and trying to hide something she didn’t understand and felt she couldn’t talk about.

In this episode, Tami opens up about the emotional and psychological impact of hair loss in women, including how it affected her confidence, identity, and relationships.

She shares:

• What it was like experiencing hair loss as a teenager
• The reality of living with androgenic alopecia (AGA)
• The mental toll of hiding hair loss and feeling “less than”
• Dating with hair loss and the fear of rejection
• Her experience with wigs, hair fibers, and alternative hair solutions
• Finding a supportive partner and navigating vulnerability in relationships
• Why true acceptance had to come from within, not from others
• The impact of societal beauty standards on women with hair loss

Tami also discusses the lack of emotional support and resources available for women with hair loss, and how that led her to create Hair Loss Pride— a community focused on support, education, and empowerment.

This episode is for any woman struggling with hair loss who feels alone, ashamed, or unsure of how to move forward.

Through honesty and lived experience, this conversation highlights an important truth: hair loss does not define a woman’s beauty or worth.

You are not alone, and there is support, community, and confidence waiting on the other side of shame.

In this episode of Shedding the Shame, I sit down with Tina Warren, who joins us all the way from Sydney, Australia, to share her deeply personal journey with alopecia, dating, and self-worth.

Tina opens up about experiencing hair loss as a teenager and how it impacted her confidence, relationships, and sense of identity. From navigating cruel comments and rejection to enduring toxic relationships and heartbreak, her story is raw, emotional, and incredibly relatable.

We talk about:

• The reality of dating with hair loss
• How past trauma and insecurity can shape relationships
• The pressure women feel around appearance and motherhood
• Finding a partner who truly accepts you exactly as you are
• Letting go of shame and learning to embrace alternative hair

Tina also shares her experience with hair systems, the transition into wearing wigs, and the surprising empowerment she’s found along the way.

This conversation is a powerful reminder that you are not your hair, and the right person will see your worth beyond anything physical.

If you’ve ever felt like your hair loss makes you “less than” or worried you won’t be loved because of it, this episode will hit home in the best way.

You are not alone; and once you start talking about it, you begin to take your power back.

You can find Tina on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/myhairwasoncethere/

This is one of the most layered and vulnerable conversations on Shedding the Shame.

In this episode, Tami sits down with a guest who has chosen to remain anonymous to share her story of divorce, a seven-year relationship with a married man, and the emotional complexity that comes with it. This isn’t a conversation about blame or scandal. It’s about what happens when a woman realizes she’s been leaving herself out of her own life.

Together, they unpack the shame, guilt, and isolation that can come with choices others don’t understand. They talk about people-pleasing, losing your voice in relationships, and the slow, often painful process of learning to include yourself in your own decisions.

This episode explores:

• What it really feels like to stay in a relationship that isn’t fully choosing you
• The internal shift from self-abandonment to self-respect
• Why leaving isn’t always as simple as it seems
• The role of support systems, coaching, and somatic work in healing
• How to hold both heartbreak and empowerment at the same time

At its core, this conversation is about reclaiming your worth, setting boundaries, and finding the courage to choose yourself, even when it costs you something.

If you’ve ever felt stuck between who you are and who you’re expected to be… this one will hit.

The coach mentioned in this episode is Freya Kennedy, and you can find more information about her here: https://www.freyakennedy.com/

In this deeply personal solo episode of Shedding the Shame, Tami shares her raw and unfiltered story of estrangement from both of her parents.

What began as years of emotional pain, unmet needs, and repeated hurt ultimately led Tami to make one of the hardest decisions of her life, walking away from her family to protect her peace, her marriage, and her children.

She opens up about the complex layers of grief, guilt, and shame that come with estrangement, the pressure from family to “make it work,” and the emotional toll of growing up without the love and validation every child deserves.

Tami also shares what happened when she reconnected with her father after seven years, the hope it gave her, and the heartbreak that followed.

This episode is not about blame. It is about truth. It is about choosing yourself. And it is about healing from the kind of pain that isn’t often talked about out loud.

If you have ever felt alone in complicated family dynamics, questioned your decision to walk away, or carried shame around your story, this conversation is for you.

You are not alone, and you are worthy of love that feels safe.

In this episode of Shedding the Shame, Tami speaks with Kelly McKenzie about one of the most devastating losses a person can experience: the sudden death of a spouse.

After six years of marriage, Kelly’s husband died from complications of Crohn’s disease, leaving her widowed at 40 and raising their two young children alone. Her son was just 16 months old and her daughter was three.

While family and friends surrounded her with sympathy, Kelly found herself navigating something far more complicated than grief. Alongside the heartbreak was an unexpected feeling of shame. As a young widow and single parent, she often felt as though the world viewed her differently.

In this conversation, Kelly shares:

• What the early days of loss looked like after her husband passed
• How people responded to her grief and how those reactions affected her
• The challenges of raising two small children while processing unimaginable loss
• The people who stepped in and helped her rebuild her life
• The hidden shame she carried as a young widow and single parent
• How she slowly found her footing again

Now, thirty years later, Kelly is finally ready to speak openly about this chapter of her life. A humour writer and author, she has begun exploring her experience with widowhood through storytelling and fiction.

Together, Tami and Kelly talk about grief, stigma, resilience, and the power of sharing the stories we once kept hidden.

Kelly also offers words of hope and compassion for anyone who has been widowed or may face profound loss in the future; because even in the most devastating seasons of life, healing and meaning can still emerge.

Find out more about Kelly here: https://www.kellylmckenzie.com/

In this solo episode of Shedding the Shame, Tami shares her personal miscarriage story for the first time in depth.

Before becoming a mother to her two daughters, Tami experienced two miscarriages. Each one was different; each one devastating in its own way. In this raw and deeply vulnerable conversation, she opens up about the shock of the first loss, the compounded grief of the second, and the heavy shame she carried in between.

She speaks candidly about the feelings many women quietly wrestle with: betrayal by her own body, questioning her worth, wondering what she had done wrong, and the profound sadness of losing not just pregnancies, but the futures she had already begun imagining.

Tami walks through:

• How her two miscarriages differed physically and emotionally
• The silent pressure and self-blame she placed on herself
• The medical appointments, interventions, and efforts she tried while attempting to conceive
• The fear that followed each positive test
• And ultimately, how she went on to have her two daughters

This episode is honest, unfiltered, and tender. It invites listeners into one of the most painful seasons of Tami’s life; not to center tragedy, but to remove isolation.

If you have experienced miscarriage, infertility, or complicated feelings about your body, this conversation is for you.

Today I’m joined by Emily Shimwell- experience designer, storyteller, lifelong gatherer, and founder of Dine Wilder.

Emily has built her life around human connection. She designs spaces that pull women out from behind their screens and back into real, honest conversation. She skips the small talk and leads with courage.

In this episode, Emily shares her experience of miscarriage at 12 weeks. We talk about the grief that followed, the well-intended but unhelpful things people say after pregnancy loss, and how her mother’s own miscarriage shaped the way she approached trying to conceive.

We also talk about her estrangement from her father, which began when she was fifteen, and how that decision has impacted her identity, boundaries, and sense of trust.

This is a conversation about:

• Miscarriage and pregnancy loss
• Grief and the pressure to “have perspective”
• Family estrangement
• Trusting yourself after loss
• Building community as a form of healing
• Holding grief and gratitude at the same time

Emily shares how community has been woven into every chapter of her life; and how gathering women together has helped her process hard things and rebuild.

If you’ve experienced miscarriage, estrangement, or any kind of loss that reshaped you, this episode will resonate deeply.