She's A Full On Monet

Today we are tackling a bit of a heavier topic, as we look at the important subject of gaslighting. Gaslighting is a term that has gained more and more use in recent years and is now a mainstream idea that can be very useful in dealing with toxic behavior in a variety of relationships. In today's chat, we will be unpacking exactly what it is, how to know if it is happening to you, and what you can do about it! Most people will have experienced some form of gaslighting in their life, and if you think you haven't, you might want to listen to this episode! In our conversation, we look at some personal examples from our lives that exemplify what we are talking about, ways we have improved our tools for dealing with difficulties and troubled waters, and how to respect others' boundaries while doing what you need to do in order to exercise self-care. We also get into the roots of the word 'gaslight', the play that helped coin the term, and why there is cause for hope as things evolve over time. So to hear it all and join the conversation, listen in with us today!

Key Points From This Episode:

• A quick definition of gaslighting and what exactly the term refers to.  
• Examples of personal experiences of gaslighting from our younger years. 
• The subtle way that gaslighting can creep into a relationship unnoticed. 
• Looking at the professional dimension to the discussion and how it can impact people's careers. 
• The origins of the term and the different techniques that it encompasses. 
• Why clear communication from the beginning can help avoid problems later on.
• A better way to fix issues in relationships; assuming good intentions! 
• Unpacking some important connected concepts; blocking, diverting, trivializing, and denial. 
• Lessons in mutual respect and understanding other people's traumas and triggers.
• How to identify if someone is gaslighting you; second-guessing, indecision, and questioning. 
• Some recommendations for tools and strategies to deal with gaslighting.  
• Having the difficult conversations and confronting the problems you are experiencing. 
• Maintaining your most important relationship: the one with yourself! 
• How things are shifting and new generational values that are developing. 

Tweetables:

“Gaslighting is a psychology term and it basically refers to a very specific type of manipulation where people make you doubt your own memory, make you doubt your recollection of events, or question your reality.” — Kelly Castillo [0:01:30]

“Explaining our feelings and being open about them is a new concept to us as humans.” — Kelly Castillo [0:05:01]

“Any kind of abusive dynamic usually starts out small and progresses into becoming a very dangerous situation.” — Megan Block [0:09:39]

“I think gaslighting is mostly about power, control. I guess that's where most abuse comes from.” — Megan Block [0:09:51]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Kelly Castillo

Megan Block 

Gaslight

She's A Full On Monet

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She's A Full On Monet on Facebook 

She's A Full On Monet on YouTube

She’s A Full On Monet Discussion Board Facebook Group

Today we’re talking about a really important subject, not just for ourselves but also for our children and the example we’re setting for them. In this episode, we discuss over-apologizing; the way in which people say “I’m sorry” when it’s stated reflexively and not as a sincere apology. We chat about the importance of apologizing when you have wronged someone, what apologies are supposed to mean, and why you shouldn’t apologize unless you really mean it. We share our thoughts on how we feel this is something that women struggle with more than men and then we breakdown a number of reasons why you may do this, how it negatively affects the way people treat you, and the challenges of breaking a habit that you may not even be aware of. Tuning in, you’ll find out how to become aware of your own unnecessary apologizing, the different contexts and reasons you may be doing this, and what you could say instead of “I’m sorry.” For all this and more, tune in for this unapologetically candid discussion!

Key Points From This Episode:

• An introduction to today’s topic of over-apologizing and why we should stop. 
• The importance of apologizing when you have wronged someone.  
• How, at the risk of stereotyping, the people who have a hard time apologizing tend to be male. 
• How apologies are supposed to mean that you won’t do it again.
• Why you shouldn’t apologize unless you mean it.
• Whether or not we’re taking away the meaning of those words by saying them too often. 
• The many reasons why we might be over-apologizing, starting with a lack of confidence.
• How some people apologize when they’re fishing for a compliment or validation. 
• How over-apologizing affects how people treat you in a negative way.
• Why over-apologizing may make you seem less capable and professional in your career.
• The challenges of breaking a habit that you’re not aware of. 
• How apologizing for behavior that doesn’t change becomes a form of gas-lighting.
• Thoughts on when not to apologize in a restaurant and what you can say instead.
• Apologizing for taking up space and how this has gotten worse since the pandemic. 
• How an unnecessary “I’m sorry” in a business context can often be replaced with “thank you.” 
• Why you shouldn’t start a phone call with an apology and what you should say instead.
• When Kelly and Megan personally use the words “I’m sorry” unnecessarily. 
• “I’m sorry” as a statement of sympathy and how this could be an attempt to redirect attention to you.  
• Homework for the week: to pay closer attention to when you say “I’m sorry” reflexively and to notice how other people respond.

Tweetables:

“If you’re one of those people who says “I’m sorry” every conversation for little things then when you really do need to apologize, it might not have the impact that you’re hoping for.” — Kelly Castillo [0:09:48]

“There’s a lot of ways that I think we teach people how to treat us and when we’re constantly apologizing preemptively or without there being anything to apologize for, it kind of gives the other people permission to walk all over us.” — Kelly Castillo [0:16:17]

“‘I’m so sorry to bother you.’ ‘It’s okay.’ What was that for? I’m really not sorry and you really don’t need to be okay with it. It’s just such a waste of time!” — Megan Block [0:34:58]

“We all just need to have more confidence in ourselves, and we all need to have more confidence in the space we’re taking and the time we take of people.” — Megan Block [0:37:57]

“The more confident and whole with ourselves we are, the less apologetic for even the smallest things.” — Megan Block [0:47:16]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Kelly Castillo

We all want to be that person who takes care of their skin but sometimes we aren’t even aware of the small habits we have that are detrimental to our skin over time. Today we are going to discuss some of these little things that we should and should not be doing that will have a big impact on our skin long-term. Tuning in you’ll hear the importance of having a skincare routine that is simple and find out why you shouldn’t rub your eyes, sleep with make-up on, or apply a product in a way that pulls at your skin. You’ll discover the potential dangers of hot baths, Epsom salts, bath bombs, fat-free dairy, artificial sweeteners, and caffeine. You’ll also hear about the benefits of silk pillowcases, tinted sunscreen, antioxidants, and water intake, as well as Kelly’s hair-tie water-drinking hack. Discover which products, cleansers, and treatments we have found to be harmful and which ones we recommend, as well as a helpful dermatologist-recommended supplement for protecting your skin from the inside. Just having this conversation pointed out some little things that we know we can do better to take care of our skin and we’re sure it will do the same for you!

Key Points From This Episode:

• An introduction to today’s topic: skincare.
• Why a skincare routine needs to be simple.
• The importance of having a routine to take care of your skin long-term.
• Megan’s bad habit of rubbing her eyes when she’s stressed. 
• Megan’s other bad habit of not applying sunscreen and why this should be part of your daily routine. 
• The supplement that Kelly’s dermatologist recommended for sun protection. 
• The harsh scrubs and cleansers Kelly and Megan used in their teens. 
• The importance of applying a product in a way that doesn’t pull at your skin. 
• Why Kelly’s uses a FOREO brush instead of a Clarisonic skin brush.
• One of the things Kelly does that she knows is bad for her skin: hot baths.
• Thoughts on whether or not to use Epsom salts, essential oils, and bath bombs.
• Why you shouldn’t sleep with make-up on.
• The benefits of silk pillowcases and washing them with nonharmful detergents. 
• How fat-free dairy can cause acne. 
• The harmful nature of artificial sweeteners on your skin. 
• Why Kelly uses tinted sunscreen.
• How it’s easy to forget to apply sunscreen to your neck and chest.
• The negative and positive effects of coffee on your skin.
• The importance of water intake and Kelly’s hair tie water-drinking hack. 
• Why you should use a piece of tissue if you have to pick at your skin or pop a pimple.
• Why Kelly hates makeup wipes and uses makeup erasers instead.
• How to encourage yourself to do a proper skincare routine every day.

Tweetables:

“I also feel like if you add too many steps to your skincare routine, you’re just setting yourself up for failure.” — Megan Block [0:08:33]

“What I think is the key probably to this whole thing is that you have to get to know your own skin and you have to figure out what works best for you personally. This is a very personal thing.” — Kelly Castillo [0:49:02]

“Find a way to encourage yourself though, because we are worth having nice skin. Even though we’re tired, if you leave it out on your counter, you might be more inclined to use it than if you put it underneath your counter.” — Megan Block [0:51:09]

“The less things that you do on your list today that damage your skin, and that could be sun damage, it could be diet, it could be artificial sweeteners, things like that. The less damage you cause to your skin, then the less steps you need to do to try to reverse damage.” — Kelly Castillo [0:52:41]

“It doesn’t have to be such a huge change, but find little ways to just add that to your day because it doesn’t take very long and it’s not

As many of you know, raising children is a lot of work. Whether they’re in kindergarten, elementary school, junior high, or high school, there are a whole range of challenges that you will have to deal with as a primary caregiver, and trust us when we say we know it can be completely overwhelming! But also trust us when we say there are strategies and approaches, which we have tried and tested, that can make things a whole lot more manageable. That’s what we’re going to share with you in today’s episode, peppered with stories of our own personal experiences as moms which will make you want to laugh and cry all at once. Whether you are a mom, dad, grandparent, or any other form of guardian, we hope this episode provides you with some useful knowledge that makes the school years easier on you and on your children because that is what all of you wholeheartedly deserve! 

Key Points From This Episode:

• Struggles that we went through with getting our children to school on time.
• Benefits of expecting things to go wrong in the morning.
• Energy that you do and don’t want to be putting onto your children before school.
• Insecurities that Kelly had as a young mom, and how this negatively affected her and her family. 
• Why it’s important to let your children do the things they are capable of doing, instead of doing everything for them.
• How Kelly maintains structure, although she is not a naturally organized person.
• The better you know your childrens’ habits and quirks, the easier your mornings will be.
• Preparing ahead will benefit your mental health as a mom.
• Hear how each of our children deals with the morning.
• Lessons from kindergarten classrooms that will make your life at home easier.
• Apps that help organize your family schedule.
• Why the teenage years are harder than the younger years. 
• The approach we adopted for when our children forgot things at home.
• Kelly’s family’s rule about the gas tanks in their cars.
• A few stories which highlight the benefits of having a stock of school supplies at home.
• What you need to teach your children before they leave for college.
• Why you should never compare your children to one another.
• Kelly’s son’s college experience.
• The value of asking your children what they need.
• Challenging transition periods in your childrens’ lives.
• Stories which define the chaos that defined our lives at some point.
• Don’t be afraid to ask for support when you need it.
• A shout out to all primary caregivers, in all shapes and forms. 

Tweetables:

“You need to prepare as much as you can so that you can prepare for the chaos that will happen inevitably.” — Megan Block [0:03:06]

“We all have our own insecurities. We all have our own stuff from our own childhood that we carry over. The sooner you let all of that go, the better off everybody's morning, afternoon, evening, etc. will be.” — Kelly Castillo [0:09:55]

“Knowing your child is part of managing expectations. If you allow the same thing to happen every day and frustrate you the same way every day, then that's a signal obviously that what you're doing isn't working and you need to change.” — Kelly Castillo [0:17:47]

“Your mental health, your kids mental health is way more important than what the elementary school or middle school has to say about whether your kids are on time.” — Kelly Castillo [0:40:07]

“Don't take it all on, make your life easier, whenever possible, figure out strategies that make your life easier.” — Kelly Castillo [01:05:09]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Kelly Castillo

Cozi 

Emotional affairs can be hard to identify because there is often a fine line between friendship and deeper feelings. How can you be sure when you are going outside of the boundaries of your relationship? In today’s episode, Kelly and Megan dive into these complexities. We hear about the importance of communication and expressing your needs. When you and your partner are compatible, you have a friendship, and there is a safe space for you to express yourself. If not, you will turn elsewhere. This is why it’s important to actually look at why you want to turn outside of your relationship for support. We find out some of the signs to look out for if you think you might be having an emotional affair. Of course, it’s ok to have good friends, but you have to have boundaries and respect your partner. Our conversation also touches on how you know when you’re having an emotional affair, why you should work on your insecurities, and the power of a deeper, long-term commitment. Tune in to hear it all!

Key Points From This Episode:

• It's much easier to know when you are in a physical affair than it is to know when you’re in an emotional one. 
• Questioning when it’s ok to have a best friend of the opposite sex. 
• When you and your partner are genuinely friends, you get a lot of your needs met. 
• Megan’s experience of having an affair and how she and her now-husband moved past it. 
• Emotional affairs are incredibly complex and tied to many things. 
• When you meet "a person of interest", they only see one aspect of you. 
• Think about the pain that you are causing your partner by having an emotional affair. 
• Many of us fear having difficult conversations with our partners. 
• Kelly’s experience of her first marriage and how she knew she had to leave. 
• You cannot make your partner jump through hoops for nothing. 
• Some of the signs that you are having an emotional affair. 
• The importance of working on your insecurities rather than taking them out on your partner. 
• You can find other people attractive, but that doesn’t mean you have to act on it. 
• A major red flag is if you are taking care of yourself to get someone else’s attention. 
• As you get older, there is a real level of commitment that is present. 
• The importance of knowing that your actions have a ripple effect. 
• It's easy to idealize relationships that are confined to a certain space and not part of real life. 
• What to do if you find yourself in this kind of situation. 
• There are so many resources you can use if you think you might be having an emotional affair. 
• You have to give your partner a chance to improve.

Tweetables:

“It comes down to communication. If you have really good communication with your partner, and you guys have that trust bond, and a genuine friend type feeling for each other, where you can share all of your most intimate thoughts and concerns and fears and all of that, it doesn't leave a lot of space for someone else to come in and be that for you.” — Kelly Castillo [0:05:59]

“A lot of times, we go to other sources to meet our needs, because we don't want to face or confront the fact that our relationship isn't working. We don't want to actually have to deal with the fact that we are with a partner who isn't a good match for us.” — Kelly Castillo [0:17:19]

“Here's the thing. The most important relationship we all have is one with ourselves.” — Megan Block [0:56:09]

“You can't outrun yourself. You can't hide from yourself. It all comes out in the end.” — Kelly Castillo [0:58:40]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Kelly Castillo

Rules are made to be broken, right? We certainly think so, at least when it comes to beauty rules. For years, women have been told what to wear and how to look, from not wearing lip gloss over a certain age to only wearing dark lipstick during the winter months, and in today’s episode, we debunk some of these outdated and unnecessary trends in favor of doing what makes you feel good. At the end of the day, that is what fashion and makeup is all about! They are simply tools that you can use to express yourself, so go ahead; contrast your lip liner with your lipstick, wear that shimmery eyeshadow, wear no makeup at all if you want to! Makeup should be a fun learning process about what you like and what works for you. We encourage you to go forth, play with products, and be daring, because the only rule is that there are no rules. Tune in today to learn more!

Key Points From This Episode:

• Kelly and Megan share how they learned about makeup from magazines growing up.
• Why Megan says she prefers a good skincare routine over a makeup routine.
• A reminder that specific makeup techniques look different depending on your face shape.
• Kelly offers her advice to do whatever makes you happy; there are no rules!
• The first outdated beauty rule we are debunking: don’t apply mascara to your bottom lashes.
• Why false eyelashes are no longer only for black tie events and evening wear.
• We discuss different false lashes and lash extensions and why we love them.
• The pressure that social media filters can create to look ‘presentable’ at all times.
• Find out why blush isn’t only for the apples of your cheeks anymore.
• How TikTok tutorials are presenting new, innovative ways to find shortcuts in your routine.
• Why you don’t have to choose makeup based on your skin tone; go ahead, play with color!
• Kelly emphasizes that makeup doesn’t have to be ‘flattering’ or appealing to anyone but you.
• Challenging the rule that women over a certain age shouldn’t wear X, Y, or Z.
• How we assess what is ‘age appropriate’ for ourselves and our kids.
• We discuss why inappropriate behavior from men should never be about what women wear.
• Some outdated skincare rules; you don’t have to fear oil-based products if you have oily skin.
• Why the only rule is that there are no rules; do what make you happy!

Tweetables:

“As a rule, whether it's fashion or beauty, there are no rules. Do what makes you happy. Do what makes you feel good.” — Kelly Castillo [0:06:59]

“Whether it's a trend or not, TikTok and all these social media platforms are finding really cool, new, inventive ways [to] find shortcuts and help [us] out.” — Megan Block [0:24:03]

“[Makeup] doesn't have to flatter you. The goal is not to look pretty for the opposite sex or anyone other than yourself.” — Kelly Castillo [0:28:21]

“If I were to ever complain about a man being inappropriate to me, or saying [something inappropriate], or looking too long, people will probably judge what I'm wearing before they would judge what he's doing. How is that my responsibility?” — Megan Block [0:39:48]

“I would definitely encourage [you] to play around with different products and just see what works for you. That applies to makeup and skincare.” — Kelly Castillo [0:47:55]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

‘Tired of These Outdated Beauty Rules? Break Up with Them!’

Lashify

Birchbox

Kelly Castillo

Megan Block

She's A Full On Monet

Through relationships, children discover who they are and learn to understand others, which is why it’s important that we build strong, positive, and nurturing relationships with our kids that will last a lifetime. In today’s episode, Kelly and Megan speak about relationship-building from their personal perspectives as parents of young children, teens, and adults. We share some tips for improving your relationship with your own children, no matter how old they are or what stage of life they are in, including the importance of really listening to them, showing an interest in their hobbies, and meeting them where they are at. We also touch on the value of setting healthy boundaries, navigating your relationship as your child gains more adult independence, and why it’s crucial that you allow your children to make small mistakes, as well as our advice for minimizing your expectations, putting your children first, and showing you care in the little moments. All of this contributes to building a resilient relationship founded on trust and mutual respect. After all, your relationship with your kids gives them cues about how to treat others, so let’s lay the groundwork for healthy, lifelong relationships!  

Key Points From This Episode:

• The conflict Megan feels about giving her nine-year-old space while also staying involved.
• Kelly highlights the need for transition in your relationships as your kids become adults.
• Our first tip to build healthy, long-lasting relationships with your kids: really listen to them.
• The value of showing an active interest in what your kids are interested in.
• Find out why Kelly didn’t teach her kids not to interrupt adult conversations.
• Megan emphasizes the need to also set healthy boundaries with your children.
• How to navigate your relationship as your child starts to learn more independence.
• How it can hamper your relationship if you don’t treat your adult children like adults.
• Why you have to let your children make small mistakes and figure things out on their own.
• Our second tip for fostering a sense of trust: when you listen, don’t react.
• Kelly shares her advice for parents whose first reaction tends to be an overly emotional one.
• The benefits of explaining how your child’s actions made you feel rather than blowing up.
• The biggest mistake Kelly sees parents making: having too many expectations.
• Hear why we don’t suggest giving your young adult and adult children unsolicited advice.
• Remember that this is a lifelong relationship; invest your time, love, energy, and effort in it!
• If Kelly could give only one piece of advice, it would be: put your children first.
• How your relationship with your kids gives them cues about how to treat others.
• Our last tip for learning and growing with your children: meet them where they are at.
• Megan suggests treating your relationships with your kids like your ideal friendship.
• How showing you care in the little moments will lay the groundwork for the big moments.
• Why it’s never too late to start implementing some of these tips with your kids.

Tweetables:

“You have to care, and you have to be enthusiastic, and you have to listen – and not just passively listen while you scroll your phone. You actually have to listen.” — Kelly Castillo [0:06:11]

“One of the biggest, greatest things about going away to college or going away to the military or moving away from home on any kind of volunteer mission is that you're forced to figure things out for yourself because of the distance.” — Kelly Castillo [0:16:33]

“It is a good thing to explore how to have a healthy relationship with your child, no matter [their] age.” — Megan Block [0:20:04]

“If you let them be who they're meant to be, they will turn out to be absolutely amazing.” — Kelly Cast

When our children leave home for the first time it can be difficult to adjust, especially for mothers. Whether your child is starting college, moving into their first apartment, or joining the military, you are suddenly left with considerably more free time on your hands and a home that can, at times, seem eerily quiet and clean. In today’s episode, we discuss some of the feelings that may come up over this time, how best to prepare for it, and why in many ways you are grieving the end of a chapter in your life. Kelly shares how she experienced her children leaving home for the first time, and we hear from Megan on how children leaving for kindergarten is in many ways a mini version of that experience. We discuss some helpful steps you can take when your children are in their teens to prepare you for this stage in your life, like trying out new hobbies or venturing into new social activities outside of parenting, like joining a book club. Kelly shares some of the positive changes she was able to make in her life after finding she had much more free time on her hands. She also expands on the difficulty of not being a part of her children’s daily lives and reflects on the importance of allowing them the time and space to grow into independent adults. We spend some time discussing how children leaving home can affect your marriage, as well as why it’s important to not make any big life changes during this time. Whether you’re a mom who works, a stay-at-home-mom, or somewhere in between, there is no doubt that children leaving home can be a difficult transition period. Join us today for a frank and compassionate discussion on this time of grief, transition, and metamorphosis!

Key Points From This Episode:

• Introducing today’s topic: how to readjust to your life after your children leave home.
• Why your children leaving home is like the end of a chapter in your life.
• The different experiences that working moms and stay-at-home moms might have when their kids leave home for the first time.
• How moms may need to rediscover how they want to use their time when their children leave home.
• Why it’s good to prepare for when your kids leave by trying out new hobbies and interests in their early teen years.
• How Kelly could shop for food and cook in a way that aligned with her values and incorporate more movement into her routine after her daughter left home.
• The feelings of grief that can come with the end of this chapter in your life.
• How the COVID 19 pandemic derailed Kelly and her husband’s plans to travel after their kids had left home.
• How Kelly found a sense of community and compassion on Facebook, with women who were going through the same experiences.
• Why you need to give your children space to learn, grow, and establish themselves when they go to college.
• How Kelly uses Snapchat to feel more connected to her kids.
• How kids leaving home can often reveal problems within a marriage.
• Why you need to give yourself time to process your empty nest before making any major life decisions.
• Why Kelly recommends that parents start finding hobbies and activities to do together a few years before their kids leave for college.
• The joy that comes with rediscovering yourself and pursuing your interests.

Tweetables:

“I think this hits everybody hard. It hits everybody differently. But it is important to take a look at your habits and routines and figure out how much of those are items of convenience because you were strapped for time.” — Megan Block [0:07:24]

“I would highly recommend anybody whose kids are 14, 15, 16, or even 17 to start looking for hobbies and interests, things that speak to you, and you've always been interested in but never had the time to pursue.” — Kelly Castillo [0:08:55]

“You’re grieving a whole phase of your life

There is no denying that social media is a huge part of modern-day life. While there can be a lot of positives to it, studies have shown that it can also lead to stress, lower self-esteem, and unrealistic expectations of yourself, your body, and your life. For some, social media has become a rollercoaster of comparison and dissatisfaction. But how do we stop the ride if we’re not having fun anymore? In today’s episode, Kelly and Megan share some of the signs that it might be time to take a break from social media and highlight some of the negative impacts it can have on your children too. We discuss our personal relationships with social media and some of the strategies we have used to help us curb our social media addictions, from scheduling screen time to charging our phones in another room or even deleting the apps altogether! We also touch on the constant pressure influencers feel to create content, finding the balance between aesthetic and authenticity, and the value of setting boundaries for yourself, as well as the importance of taking the time to unplug and reconnect with yourself, nature, and your family. There is no right or wrong way to use social media and our use cases vary so widely, but we suggest asking yourself: if you were to not have your phone with you for a full day, a week, or a month, how would you feel? Sometimes, it is important to assess what you might be distracting yourself from. Tune in today for our insights on a topic that is relevant to almost everyone in 2021!

Key Points From This Episode:

• How social media can affect your mental health in a negative way.
• The importance of also monitoring your children’s relationship with social media.
• Kelly shares how she navigated social media with her own kids, balancing trust with safety.
• How comparison on social media can impact young girls’ self-esteem and body image.
• What a social media break can look like; the value of paying attention to your gut instincts.
• Capturing the moment versus curating an experience instead of enjoying it in the moment.
• It’s not about how you use social media, but how it is affecting your mental health.
• How to cleanse your Instagram feed by focusing on how an account makes you feel.
• Megan and Kelly discuss their personal relationships with social media and work.
• The constant pressure to create content and the profound impact your like count can have.
• How content creators and influencers have been affected by the pandemic.
• Try sharing the content you feel has the most value, not what you think will “perform” best.
• Tips for those whose main source of income is social media: try batch working on content.
• Megan highlights the importance of self-evaluating how and why you are using social media.
• How to take a break, from scheduling screen time to deleting the apps altogether.
• Kelly recommends that you don’t plug your phone in next to your bed at night.
• The importance of taking time to unplug and reconnect with yourself, nature, and family.
• Assess what you are distracting yourself from; how social media addiction can be symptomatic of deeper issues.
• Strategies you can employ to reduce your dependency on your mobile phone.
• Reevaluate how often you use social media, how it makes you feel, and whether or not you are using it to distract yourself from something.

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Kelly Castillo

Megan Block

She's A Full On Monet

She's A Full On Monet on Twitter

She’s A Full On Monet on Instagram

Arguments about money can hamper many happy relationships. This is especially true for couples that live together and those that are married, with financial issues frequently cited as one of the leading reasons for divorce. But why is money such a sticky subject? In today’s episode, Kelly and Megan dive into this very personal topic. We discuss how more traditional arrangements between partners have evolved with the times and the value of communicating openly with your partner and your children about money, as well as doing what works for your unique circumstances. No two relationships are the same and individual financial situations can vary just as broadly, so it can be useful to set realistic expectations and discuss money, children, and elderly relatives before you decide to get married or enter into a long-term relationship with someone. Preparing for the unexpected is a key theme in this conversation, and both Kelly and Megan emphasize the importance of ensuring that you are financially literate and learning how to protect yourself should a worst-case scenario occur, especially as a woman. It certainly isn’t a romantic conversation, but it is an important one to have with your partner! We also touch on the challenges that come with blended families, supporting adult children, and what is known as ‘financial infidelity’, so make sure to tune in today for a candid and revealing discussion about financial arrangements in relationships!

Key Points From This Episode:

• Why finances are such a sensitive subject to navigate, especially during COVID.
• How traditional financial arrangements between couples have evolved over time.
• The emotional relationship many people have with spending habits and personal debt.
• The value of communication and doing what works for your unique relationship.
• Financial decisions required for managing children and elderly relatives.
• Advice for educating your children about finances: communicate openly with them.
• While money does not define your family, it can be important to set realistic expectations.
• Megan and Kelly share what their own parents taught them about finances.
• The benefits of teaching your children about the importance of saving early on.
• Kelly speaks candidly about how her adult children manage their own finances.
• The value of discussing money, children, and elderly relatives before marriage, not after.
• Why it is important to be prepared for the unexpected to happen.
• Tough love; why couples often disagree on how to support their adult children.
• What has worked for Kelly: separate private accounts and a shared household account.
• How to minimize resentment when both partners don’t earn the same level of income. 
• Some of the additional challenges that come with blended families or second marriages.
• Find out what ‘financial infidelity’ is and how having a private account can prevent it.
• Kelly highlights the importance of having emotional sensitivity for your partner.
• A simple rule Kelly lives by: if you can’t tell your partner, maybe you shouldn’t be doing it.
• Why it is essential that you are as financially literate as possible; educate yourself!

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

IRS Innocent Spouse Relief

Kelly Castillo

Megan Block

She's A Full On Monet

She's A Full On Monet on Twitter

She’s A Full On Monet on Instagram