Simplify Complexity: Christian Relationship Advice & Help

Oneness in marriage is critical to a successful marriage, but achieving it can be difficult. The main reason it can be so hard is because of individualism (the habits and principles of being independent). Let’s be honest, for the most part people are selfish. It’s easier to be selfish, than it is to be selfless. Even in the beginning stages of dating, ultimately you date those that meet a need for you. If you aren’t attracted to that person physical or emotionally, you won’t continue dating them.

Yet in marriage individualism must change. Marriage succeeds when each person is able to put their spouses needs above their own, even if it means sacrificing your needs in the moment.

In this podcast episode we explore how to achieve oneness in marriage. This is both a spiritual and physical issue. We offer insight as to how oneness is achieved spiritually, and then share tips to help you gain unity through physical action. Even if you are single you can gain from hearing these foundational marriage principles. If you have questions or comment please leave in the comment section. We love to hear from you.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald

• Matt. 19:4   And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
• Eph. 5:31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

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Family and friends are a major part of our lives, but depending upon your community (family and friends) and their influence, it will determine whether their impact is positive or negative. In our last podcast we examined the value community plays while single and dating. In this podcast we want to examine the importance of family & friends while married.

Relationships take a lot effort and attention to be successful. This is only magnified when married. As you begin to build a life together, grow and possibly have kids. It is easy for a couple to slowly distance themselves from their community. In some ways this is expected. When married you are not going to do the same things you did while single. Although things change, maintaining healthy relationships with friends and family outside of your marriage can be vital to a healthy marriage.  

This podcast is part of a two part series. After listening to part two on marriage be sure to check out part one, the impact of community while single and dating. If you have any questions or comments we would love to hear from you.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald

The post The Importance of Family & Friends while Married appeared first on Simplify Complexity.

Family and friends are a major part of our lives, but depending upon your community (family and friends) and their influence, it will determine whether their impact is positive or negative. Hopefully, you are mindful to surround yourself with positive people. The point of this episode is to talk about how the right type of community will help your relationship for the positive.

When people are single their community is a natural part of their lives, but as people begin to date or become married it becomes much harder to maintain those connections consistently. As a result many of the challenges people face in singleness and dating, they do alone. God doesn’t want you to be alone in your challenges.

This podcast will be a two part series where we will discuss the importance of family and friends around you while single or dating. Then in part two we’ll discuss their impact while married. Be sure to share this podcast with your friends.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald

Photo Copyright by rawpixel | 123rf photos

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Don’t Love Them Hoes, is a catchphrase coined by Snoop Dog in the 90’s. This phrase and its thought permeated throughout much of hip-hop, and American culture. The idea behind this phrase promoted a “Playa’s Mentality“. Women are seen more as objects to conquer vs someone to troth. It is also a sign of weakness for a man to open up his heart.

Opening your heart to a woman or catching feelings, is not a bad thing. Men who desire to be loved, and to have meaningful lasting relationships, must be able to give love. In this podcast we talk about the pressures men face culturally to dismiss sensitive feelings. We examine this male stereo type, and how it can negatively impact relationships. We also discuss the importance of masculinity and its role within relationships. Let Christ be your ultimate guide who is the perfect display of manhood and did not avoid his feelings.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald

Picture Copyright by Aleksandr Davydov | 123rf photos

The post Combatting a Don’t Love Them %@# Mentality appeared first on Simplify Complexity.

I believe being nervous isn’t a bad thing. There is a sense of humility that comes with being nervous, and with that humility people should learn to lean on God for strength. Unfortunately, the levels of nervousness people feel are not the same; nor is how they respond to it. For some their anxieties can result in a complete lack of confidence, which negatively impacts their dating experience. Some people are so overwhelmed that they shy away from dating all together. So what does one do? Are there tips to having confidence while dating?

In this podcast episode we share several tips to help someone who may be searching for ways to gain more confidence during the dating process. Pastor Wallace also shares more in-depth information about the dating process in his book, Chasing Happily Ever After. Whether single or dating this resource will truly open your eyes to critical information that will help you to find success in relationships. If you have a question or topic you would like us to discuss on the podcast, please share it in the comment section or go to the contact page. We would love to hear from you.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald.

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People in all walks of life are in pursuit of love within relationships, but what is that exactly? Some in their pursuits are chasing passion, while others are desiring happiness, but is happiness. Many people consciously or unconsciously build their idea of love from the movies they watch, the music they listen to, or the people they admire, but is that where one learns love.

An idea is just that, an idea. It is a thought formed in your mind. Just because you thought of a great plan, doesn’t mean the execution of that plan will turn out great. That’s where reality comes into play. It’s important to match one’s ideas with reality, otherwise you could be living in a fantasy. In this podcast episode we talk about the reality of love. It is the reality of love that will play out in our lives. If I have a correct understanding, then I can make sure my pursuit is obtainable.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald

Highlight Scriptures:

“These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full. This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends (John 15:11-13, NKJV). 

The post In Pursuit of Love, What is LOVE? appeared first on Simplify Complexity.

Relationship advice comes in all types of shapes and sizes. It also comes from all types of people. Not everyone who gives relationship advice is qualified to give it, and not all relationship advice is helpful. Yet what happens when people we admire, look up to, or are popular, give relationship advice? Do we except it at face value, or do we filter whether it is wise or unwise. Let’s evaluate relationship advice given by celebrities

Once a month we like to canvass any current events that may pertain to relationships, and see if we can learn something from them. In this podcast episode we will evaluate recent relationship advice given by celebrities, shared on Elite Daily, and assess its helpfulness in relationships. If you have some current events you would like us to highlight please let us know.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace and Keonte McDonald

The post Relationship News 6/3: Evaluating Relationship Advice given by Celebrities appeared first on Simplify Complexity.

There is a thought, that if a date goes well it should end with a kiss, and if not the date is possibly a failure. Not everyone takes this position, but there is a cultural norm for a dating couple to have some form of physical intimacy early in the dating process, and this physical intimacy is seen as a positive sign. Where does this idea come from? Most of the time when people begin dating they don’t know each other, or have little acquaintance. For people to share in something that is as intimate as a kiss with a stranger what does that say? Where does physical intimacy go from there as the relationship progresses? Should you kiss on a first date?

In this podcast episode we welcome special guest, Daphne Wynn, host of Straight Talk with Daphne out of Atlanta. We take a hard look at the idea of kissing on the first date, or first couple dates. What does kissing say about the status of a relationship? 

I believe as a result of cultural dating norms, we are in danger of devaluing physical intimacy. Physical touch says something. It also creates physical and emotional bonds. Therefore, who people bond themselves with shouldn’t be cheapened to just a good date & attraction.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Quest Daphne Wynn

Picture Copyright by Peter Bernik / 123RF photos

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It’s hard to avoid seeing relationships on instagram, facebook, or other social media platforms. There are couples who literally travel around the world taking pictures of themselves for others to see. Yes, imagine that! Some couples get paid to travel and take exotic pictures with the perfect background, the perfect wardrobe, and the perfect smile, but the challenge with these pictures and others like them is relationships are not picture perfect. So how do we avoid SMRES, Social Media Relationship Envy Syndrome. I totally made that up, but you get the idea. Don’t be fooled by relationships you see on social media.

Social Media is still fairly new. It’s fun to get a glimpse into the life of friends and people, but an unhealthy by product can form if a person begins to envy the images they see.  An image that is often times a “staged” portrait. As people gaze into the life of others, some if not many are unconsciously comparing their life with those they follow. This is not new. People have been comparing their life with friends and neighbors for a long, long time. It’s where we get the term, keeping up with the joneses. The difference today is people are able to follow hundreds and thousands of people, verses just a small circle of friends and neighbors. No longer is it keeping up with the joneses, but rather keeping up with the world.

In this podcast episode we want to talk about the challenges that can come from overly admiring the relationships you see on social media. We discuss some of the dangers and how they can have a negative effect on how you view your own life and relationships. We also share helpful tips to avoid these negative side effects. Don’t become a victim of Social Media Relationship Envy Syndrome.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald

Photo Copyright by Fabio Formaggio / 123rf

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Many romantic relationships form as a result of an initial interest. Meaning the two really didn’t know each other before they began the journey of a romantic friendship, which would hopefully evolve. Yet there are instances when two people initially formed a platonic friendship, and over time one or both began to feel something more for the other. How do you approach these desires? From friends to dating.

In this podcast episode we discuss from friends to dating. We share how to handle emotions of attraction towards a platonic friend. We also discuss steps a person can take to communicate those feelings, and allow for the possibility of that friendship to evolve into something more. It is a wonderful thing when a relationship can form from a deep friendship. Yet, don’t allow fears, doubts, and anxieties keep you from what could possibly be.

Hosted by Pastor Brian Wallace & Keonte McDonald

Picture Copyright by Rob Marmion / 123rf Photos

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