Slay ADHD with Buffy 🎧✨

You set the routine up with every good intention. Maybe it was the gym four days a week, or writing every morning, or finally reading the novels stacked by your bed. A week or two in, the routine started competing with everything else in your day, and with ADHD, the newest and loudest thing usually wins.

FREE Build Your ADHD End-of-Year Survival Plan Workshop Nov 17th, Want in? Just subscribe to Buffy Fermino on Substack for free and you’re in. We’re going LIVE on Tuesday, November 17 at 12:00 PM ET / 9:00 AM PT.

One Click Gets You In 👇🏽

Join FREE Workshop

Need more support?

Grab a Year of ADHD Coaching for $397 (Reg $1297) + the free workshop

Special: 1 Year of ADHD for $397

Already a subscriber? You’re all set. Put November 17 at 12:00 PM ET in your calendar now, before your brain files it under “later.”

Now, on with the show 🎙️

In this episode, Buffy shares the exact method she built for her clients, based on CBT for adult ADHD, to build routines without pressure, guilt, or shame. It started with a shopping trip and a promise she made out loud to her coaching group, and it turned into a rule she still keeps today. If you’ve already tried willpower, apps, and color-coded calendars, this one comes at the problem from a direction you probably haven’t tried.

In this episode:

* Why a routine you care about still loses to whatever’s newest and loudest in your day

* The Lululemon promise Buffy made to her group, and what happened the next morning

* The CBT principle behind the method, and why your smart adult brain falls for it anyway

* How one client read 10 novels in 12 months, and the location-based anti-scroll strategy that helps clients reach their goals

* How far to take it before you sabotage yourself with diminishing returns

* Why “more consistent” beats “always consistent” when you have ADHD

Try this: Before you listen, pick the one routine you most want more of this month, and notice what usually wins instead when it’s time to start. Keep that answer handy for the episode.

Want in on the FREE Build Your End-of-Year ADHD Survival Plan Workshop? Just subscribe to Buffy Fermino on Substack for free and you’re in! We’re going LIVE on Tuesday, November 17 at 12:00 PM ET / 9:00 AM PT.

One Click Gets You In 👇🏽

Join FREE Workshop

Need more support?

Grab a year of ADHD coaching for only $397 + the free workshop👇🏽

A year of ADHD Coaching for $397

Already a subscriber on Substack? You’re all set. Put November 17 at 12:00 PM ET in your calendar now, before your brain files it under “later.”

Books mentioned: Mason Currey, Daily Rituals: How Artists Work; Alex Soojung-Kim Pang, Rest: Why You Get More Done When You Work Less; Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol; Charles Darwin, On the Origin of Species.

Disclaimer: Buffy Fermino is a licensed therapist and Productivity/ADHD coach. Any information shared publicly by Buffy, including Slay ADHD, other podcasts, social media, Heretic, and on Substack is for education purposes only. This content is not therapy, counseling, or medical advice, and it does not constitute a therapist–client relationship. By consuming, you agree to these statements. If you’re in crisis in the U.S., call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Outside the U.S., search local help on findahelpline.com

FREE Build Your ADHD End-of-Year Survival Plan Workshop Nov 17, Want in? Just subscribe to Heretic on Substack for free and you're in. We're going LIVE on Tuesday, November 17 at 12:00 PM ET / 9:00 AM PT.

One Click Gets You In 👇🏽

buffyfermino.com/subscribe

Already a subscriber? You're all set. Put November 17 at 12:00 PM ET in your calendar now, before your brain files it under "later."

Now, on with the show 🎙️

If your brain needs a long walk before it will say anything useful, you're in very good company. While Charles Dickens was writing A Christmas Carol in the fall of 1843, he told a friend he'd been walking fifteen and twenty miles through the back streets of London at night, long after everyone sensible had gone to bed, turning the story over in his head.

In Part Two of the Victorian Ghost series, Buffy picks up where Episode 7 left off. If your ADHD leans inattentive, your attention moves like a Victorian ghost: she takes the stairs at her own pace and wants a proper warm-up before she settles. This episode looks at how the Victorians built days that gave her that room, how three waves of speed took it away, and how to bring some of it back into the life you're living now.

In this episode:

Why Dickens needed his night walks to write one of the most famous ghost stories ever told

Afternoon tea, "at home" days, and calling cards: how the Victorians built pauses into the day

Why built-in pauses work as resets for an inattentive brain, while unplanned drifting feels like failure

The three great thefts of slow time: the factory clock, the internet, and AI

Why most of us can't live like Darwin at Down House (family money and household staff help)

Five rituals to borrow: count the warm-up as work, walk before you decide, write letters, keep "at home" hours, and protect your four hours

Try this: Grab your journal and ask, "If my attention were a Victorian ghost, what would she need this week to feel at home in my house? Where can I give her a walk, a letter, or a proper cup of tea?" Choose one answer and do it this week.

Free workshop: Join me for the Build Your End-of-Year ADHD Survival Plan Workshop, LIVE on Substack on Tuesday, November 17, 2026, at 12:00 PM ET / 9:00 AM PT. It's free. Just subscribe to Heretic, my publication on Substack, for free and you're in: buffyfermino.com/subscribe

Books mentioned: Mason Currey, Daily Rituals: How Artists Work; Alex Soojung-Kim Pang, Rest: Why You Get More Done When You Work Less; Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol; Charles Darwin, On the Origin of Species.

Buffy Fermino is a licensed therapist and ADHD coach. Any information shared publicly by Buffy, including Slay ADHD, other podcasts, social media, Heretic, and on Substack is for education purposes only. This content is not therapy, counseling, or medical advice, and it does not constitute a therapist–client relationship. By consuming, you agree to these statements. If you're in crisis in the U.S., call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Outside the U.S., search local help here https://findahelpline.com/

Don't forget to register for the FREE Build Your End of the Year ADHD Survival Plan Workshop. It's happening LIVE on Substack November 17, 2026 at 12:00PM EST/ 9AM PST.

Inattentive ADHD often comes with a slow start, and the daily routines of Darwin, Dickens, and Tchaikovsky show how to build a day that makes room for it.

You sit down to start at eleven, and somehow your brain doesn’t show up until one-thirty. If your ADHD leans inattentive, or you’re someone who simply takes longer to get going, that slow warm-up probably feels like a personal failing you should have fixed years ago.

In this episode, Buffy Fermino, a licensed therapist and a career and ADHD coach, makes the case that your attention is a Victorian ghost: lovely, old-fashioned, and built for a slower day full of walks, letters, and afternoon tea. Drawing on Mason Currey’s Daily Rituals and Alex Soojung-Kim Pang’s Rest: Why You Get More Done When You Work Less, she looks at how some of history’s most productive minds did their focused work in a few concentrated hours, and how the Industrial Revolution, the internet, and AI have each taken away more of the slow time this kind of brain depends on.

In this episode:

* Why inattentive ADHD often comes with a long on-ramp, and how task initiation and attention shifting play into it

* Darwin’s daily circuits of the Sandwalk and his roughly four hours of focused work a day

* Dickens’s long afternoon walks through London and Tchaikovsky’s two-hour walking rule

* Afternoon tea, “at home” days, and why a day with clear edges suits an inattentive brain

* The three big speed-ups that took away our slow time: the factory clock, the internet, and AI

* Five Victorian rituals you can borrow for a modern schedule, partner, career, and all

Try this: Before your most important task this week, build twenty to thirty minutes of warm-up into your plan (tea, one small tidy, rereading yesterday’s notes) and count it as work.

Your prompt for the week: Grab your journal and answer this: If my attention were a Victorian ghost, what would she need this week to feel at home in my house? Where can I give her a walk, a letter, or a proper cup of tea? Choose one answer and do it.

You finally crossed off the task that’s been sitting on your list for two months. You made the appointments, sent the email, texted the friend. Then a couple of days later the energy dips, and the fear sets in: can I keep this going, or was that a one-time visit?

In this episode, Buffy explains why a good day can feel just as unsettling as a bad one when you have ADHD, and why the usual advice to “be consistent” leaves so many people at the back of the pack. ADHD brains, bodies, and emotions run more like interval training than a marathon. So the goal shifts from flawless consistency to resilience, and you get there through trial and error with a little structure around it.

In this episode:

Why productive days get treated as rare and fragile, and what that clutching costs you

Consistency vs. resilience: which one you can rely on with ADHD

The interval-training model of ADHD energy (sprint, rest, repeat)

How all-or-nothing thinking turns one Saturday walk into a lifetime commitment

The structured experiment: what to look at, what to recreate, and why you try it twice

Why ADHD routines often need a refresh about every 90 days

Try this: Think about your last really good day. What day was it, what time, and where were you? Pick one condition you can recreate, try it twice, and see what three data points tell you.

Tell Buffy: What day, time, and place worked for you, and what are you testing to build your own ADHD momentum routine?

Grab free resources and more over on the website BuffyFermino.com

If you have ADHD and your sleep’s been off lately, this episode is for you🌙💤 First of all, it’s not your fault—actually. The body clock in a lot of people with ADHD runs late. Studies looking at melatonin, the hormone that tells your body it's getting dark and it's time to wind down, have found that in many adults with ADHD, melatonin starts rising later in the evening than it does for people without ADHD. We’re about to use the magic of the Fall Equinox (Northern Hemisphere) to slowly, gently, and naturally reset your rhythm and get you the sleep you need—without the unrealistic expectations or guilt.

Slay ADHD with Buffy, therapist and career & ADHD coach. Strategies for focus, work, relationships. This episode: Autumn Equinox/Fall Equinox ADHD sleep hacks.

ADHD and busy minds see the potential in all things. Let’s use this singular perspective to flip the narrative and help you get things done.

Get Buffy's content & Free resources

Check out the system that blends productivity with reflection to achieve with intention. Read now: Heretic_Read Listen Now: Heretic_Podcast

What if Leo season is illuminating your brilliance, but you’re missing out because you think it’s all about shining? In this episode, we walk through Leo season, week by week, through the lens of the human design gates. So you'll know exactly when to shine, when to retreat, and when to synthesize your overthinking or ADHD tendencies into sunshiny brilliance. 🌞

Heretic Home Page

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by the many categories of to-dos in your life or were just feeling chaotic and started to doom scroll, you might have come across the idea of a Reset Day. Expertly edited YouTube videos and 30-second Instagram reels present this as a quick fix to Cinderella your whole life, but you guessed it: it’s really a pumpkin and doesn’t quite work like that. The topic came up inside my VIP group today, so I wanted to share this episode that outlines a practical, real-world way to get started with Reset Days, and what it looks like when you approach them from a place of imperfection and a little persistence instead of the ADHD arch nemesis, #OneHeroicMonday.