Slaying Sober

What the conversation covers

• Jared’s “normal” Aussie upbringing, love of surfing and metal music, and early experiences with alcohol.​

• How drinking escalated in his late teens and 20s around clubs, footy, bands, and mates, leading to blackouts, fights, guilt, relationship breakdown, and large unpaid fines.​

• The point nine years earlier where he decided to stop drinking after another destructive binge and ongoing shame, including how publicly declaring his intent to quit and a court decision wiping $62,000 in fines became a turning point he sees as a “higher power” moment.​

• Jared initially tried to stay sober mostly on his own, attending a few AA meetings, taking some tools, then “white‑knuckling” it for about seven years, still carrying a lot of self‑hate and ego.​

• Returning to 12‑step meetings as a support person for his partner humbled him; finding a sponsor and doing the steps shifted him from merely not drinking to actually healing emotionally and spiritually.​

• He describes the steps as a way of living that reduced his anger (for example, road rage), helped him forgive himself, and allowed him to genuinely like and love who he is.​

• Jared and James talk about the stigma of addiction and how many people in recovery hide their past because they feel shame, even after getting sober.​

• Jared founded “University of Sober Living” as a clothing brand and community to give people in recovery a visible, pride‑based identity, plus a website where people can reach out for support outside formal 12‑step rooms.​

• Both men emphasise “recovering loudly so others don’t die in silence,” and how being open about sobriety prompts others at footy clubs, gyms, or social circles to quietly ask for help.​

• Jared explains how alcohol contributed to the breakdown of his relationship with his children’s mother and how he prioritised drinking over family, though he avoided drinking directly in front of his kids.​

• He and his current partner are both in recovery; she is also a carer for a severely disabled child, experienced carer burnout and rehab, and is now building services to support other special‑needs parents.​

• Their household focus is now on service and community—supporting people with addiction and carers in distress—because recovery has given them a “second life” they want to share.​

• Jared still plays Super Rules footy (over‑35s), noting that many teammates deal with health issues, addiction, or major life stress and often seek someone with lived experience to talk to.​

• His week in recovery usually involves around five meetings across both AA and NA, which he compares to ongoing “spiritual fitness” and a source of connection and emotional reset.​

• He and James stress that you can fully enjoy team sport and camaraderie while sober—celebrating with soft drinks, conversation, and community instead of relying on alcohol.

Recovery and the 12-step journeyService, community, and “University of Sober Living”Family, partners, and helping othersLife in ongoing recovery

James reflect on 2 Years Sobriety

Old drinking buddies, sharing war stories, laughs and sober inspiration.

Get ready to laugh, and maybe cry, as Sammy and James chat about their

Summary

In this episode, James and Levvo reconnect over their shared experiences of sobriety and reminisce about their wild days living in a pub in Bristol. They explore the impact of alcohol on their lives, the friendships formed during that time, and the entrepreneurial spirit that emerged from their drinking culture. Through humorous anecdotes and reflective insights, they discuss the challenges of navigating sobriety and the lessons learned from their past. In this conversation, Levo and James Date discuss their journeys of sobriety, the challenges they faced, and the rewards they have experienced since giving up alcohol. They explore the social aspects of drinking, the struggle with moderation, and the importance of self-reflection and honesty in their recovery. The discussion also touches on the impact of sports culture on drinking habits and the fulfillment they find in their lives post-alcohol. They emphasize that anyone can achieve sobriety and that the journey is worth it, sharing personal anecdotes and insights along the way.

Takeaways

We shared an enthusiasm for sobriety.

Living in a pub created lifelong friendships.

Drinking was a daily routine without fail.

We were enablers in our drinking culture.

The Naked Bacon Bet was a wild experience.

The 10 Quid Challenge showcased our creativity.

Induction at the cider bar was a rite of passage.

Alcohol was deeply ingrained in our social lives.

Sobriety has led to self-discovery and growth.

Reflecting on past behaviors brings both laughter and shame. Sobriety can feel foreign, especially in social situations.

Non-alcoholic beers can be a social alternative.

The decision to stop drinking can lead to profound personal rewards.

Self-reflection is crucial in the journey of sobriety.

Moderation can be a difficult battle for many.

Past experiences shape our current perspectives on alcohol.

Finding fulfillment outside of alcohol is possible and rewarding.

Honesty with oneself is key to recovery.

Sports culture can heavily influence drinking habits.

The journey of sobriety can inspire others to make changes.

Summary

In this conversation, Jake shares his transformative journey from prison to recovery, emphasizing the importance of vulnerability, daily practices, and helping others. He reflects on his past, the significance of his relationships, particularly with his grandmother, and the spiritual symbolism of his experiences. Jake highlights the power of community and support in overcoming addiction and encourages others to take steps towards a better life.

Takeaways

Jake was given a second chance after prison.

He faced a pivotal moment to change his life.

Vulnerability is key to forming connections.

Rehab taught him the importance of honesty.

He experienced a spiritual awakening during recovery.

Daily practices like breath work are essential for him.

Helping others is a crucial part of his recovery.

His relationship with his grandmother is foundational.

Symbolism in his life events helped him heal.

Jake believes dreams can come true with effort.

Welcome to Slaying Sober. Today, James speaks with Gary, whose early life was inspired by the gangster lifestyle and led him to time in max security prison. Gary’s journey of breaking free from addiction and crime in Perth proves that no cycle is unbreakable, and hope is always within reach.

Takeaways:

Gary shares his journey of addiction and recovery.

He emphasizes the importance of self-love in overcoming addiction.

The role of environment and relationships in addiction is crucial.

Gary discusses the challenges of staying sober after recovery.

He highlights the significance of community support in recovery.

Nature and mindfulness are key tools for healing.

Gary's story illustrates the impact of trauma on addiction.

He believes in the power of personal stories to inspire others.

Gary's relationship with his partner has been a source of strength.

He stresses the need for internal work to achieve lasting sobriety.

Summary

In this conversation, Gary shares his profound journey from addiction to recovery, emphasizing the importance of self-love, community support, and the role of nature in healing. He discusses the challenges faced during his addiction, the impact of his environment, and the significance of relationships in his recovery process. Gary's story serves as an inspiration for those struggling with addiction, highlighting the internal work required to achieve lasting sobriety.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Early Reflections

07:51 Breaking the Cycle of Addiction

10:51 Life After Prison

13:32 The Turning Point: Finding Love

22:26 Self-Love and Recovery

23:57 Articulation and Connection in Recovery

24:37 The Journey to Sobriety: Personal Experiences

25:40 Changing Environments for Recovery

26:25 Building Community in Recovery

27:23 Strength Through Overcoming Addiction

28:12 Daily Practices for Recovery

29:11 Celebrating Progress in Recovery

30:04 The Role of Social Media in Recovery

31:48 Expectations of Praise in Sobriety

32:55 Facing Criticism and Naysayers

34:09 The Reality of Addiction Recovery

37:04 Nature as a Healing Tool

38:42 Childhood Joys and Their Role in Recovery

41:56 The Importance of Community Support

42:52 Gratitude for Supportive Relationships

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Summary

In this conversation, Nicki shares her inspiring journey of overcoming alcohol addiction, detailing her experiences from childhood through to her current nine months of sobriety.

She discusses the early signs of her drinking habits, the escalation into dependency, the impact on her marriage, and the pivotal moment that led her to seek help.

Nicki emphasizes the importance of community support, self-love, and the ongoing nature of recovery, highlighting the positive changes in her life since becoming sober.

Takeaways

• Nicki has been sober for nine months and feels amazing.
• She experienced early drinking habits as a way to gain confidence.
• Alcohol became a coping mechanism for her anxiety.
• Nicki's marriage was affected by both partners being heavy drinkers.
• She sought help after realizing her drinking was unmanageable.
• Rehab provided her with tools to face her problems without alcohol.
• Nicki emphasizes the importance of gratitude in her recovery.
• She encourages others to seek help and not to do it alone.
• Her children are now proud of her journey and recovery.
• Nicki believes that the journey of recovery is beautiful and transformative.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Early Sobriety Journey

04:34 First Experiences with Alcohol

06:07 Escalation into Substance Use

07:43 Motherhood and Alcohol's Role

09:15 Anxiety and Reliance on Alcohol

11:27 Social Drinking and Community Expectations

12:48 Realization of Drinking Problems

13:28 Marriage Breakdown and Alcohol's Impact

14:23 Attempts to Seek Help

16:36 Understanding Addiction and Its Progression

18:38 The Turning Point to Sobriety

22:50 Final Steps to Recovery

23:58 The Decision to Seek Help

25:48 Experiences in Rehab

27:55 The Importance of Support

30:54 Overcoming Guilt and Embracing Recovery

33:03 Role Modeling for Children

35:51 Finding Happiness in Sobriety

37:52 Tools for Ongoing Recovery

41:40 The Power of Vulnerability and Community

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We discuss the downside of a bikie lifestyle, drugs in prison, psychosis, guns, suicide and desperation.

As well as some witty insights from Sam.

Summary

In this conversation, Sam shares his journey from addiction to recovery, emphasizing the importance of mentorship and personal stories in helping others.

He discusses the glamorization of gang life and the harsh realities of addiction, highlighting the need for a more effective rehabilitation system.

The conversation also touches on generational trauma and the impact of societal perceptions on individuals struggling with addiction.

Summary

In this conversation, Sam shares his journey from addiction to recovery, emphasizing the importance of healing past traumas and the role of mentorship in helping others.

He discusses his early experiences with drugs, the escalation of his addiction, and the realization that true peace comes from within rather than from external sources.

Sam reflects on the sense of belonging he found in unhealthy environments and the turning point that led him to seek help in rehab. In this conversation, Sam shares his profound journey of recovery from addiction, emphasizing the importance of compassion, support, and understanding the roots of addiction.

He discusses the role of somatic therapy in emotional healing and the significance of establishing a daily routine to maintain sobriety. Sam highlights the transformative power of relationships, particularly with his mother and wife, and reflects on the importance of self-love and positive self-talk in the recovery process.

The conversation culminates in a celebration of personal growth and the impact of recovery on family dynamics.

Takeaways

Unbreakable means healing past traumas and fears.

Helping others transition from broken to unbreakable.

Service to others is crucial in recovery.

Childhood experiences shape our future behaviors.

Drugs initially provided a sense of peace.

Chasing happiness can lead to disappointment.

Finding true connection is essential for recovery.

Addiction manifests in various forms beyond drugs.

Belonging can be found in unhealthy environments.

Trust and compassion can spark change. Sam's journey of recovery involved breaking trust with his mother.

Compassion from others helped Sam learn to be compassionate to himself.

Understanding the root causes of addiction is crucial for recovery.

Somatic therapy can help release trauma stored in the body.

Establishing a daily routine is essential for maintaining sobriety.

Self-love and positive self-talk are powerful tools in recovery.

Compassionate relationships can significantly aid in the healing process.

Recovery is about more than just meetings; it's about daily actions.

Sam emphasizes the importance of being present for his children.

The gifts of recovery include deeper connections with loved ones.

Chapters

00:00 From Broken to Unbreakable: Sam's Journey

08:08 First Encounters with Drugs and Alcohol

13:06 Escalation into Drug Culture

19:05 The Cycle of Addiction and Seeking Acceptance

22:43 The Brotherhood and Comradery of the Bike Club

28:06 The Turning Point: Compassion and Trust in Recovery

32:15 The Struggles of Rehabilitation and Self-Discovery

36:11 The Role of Family Support in Recovery

41:14 Navigating Recovery: Justifications and Challenges

46:22 Reframing Childhood Trauma

51:44 Establishing a Healing Routine

52:12 Practicing Gratitude and Self-Love

54:27 Mindfulness and Presence in Daily Life

56:47 Compassion and Understanding in Recovery

57:10 The Role of Family in Recovery

01:02:09 Celebrating Growth and Connection

01:04:48 Reflections on School and Early Life

01:05:28 The Business of Drug Dealing

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Summary

In this conversation, Andrew shares his profound journey from addiction to recovery, emphasizing the importance of self-discovery, community, and the role of golf in his life. He reflects on his early experiences, the challenges he faced, and how he found solace and purpose through therapy and vulnerability. Andrew discusses the significance of surrendering to life's challenges and the opportunities that arise in recovery, ultimately leading to a fulfilling life as a professional golfer.

Takeaways

Golf is a metaphor for life and self-discovery.

Serenity enhances performance in challenging activities.

Addiction often stems from unresolved trauma.

Community support is crucial in recovery.

Therapy plays a vital role in healing past wounds.

Vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness.

Surrendering to circumstances opens up new opportunities.

Recovery is about taking responsibility for one's life.

Building a new life requires effort and commitment.

Finding passion can lead to personal fulfillment.

Chapters

00:00 The Challenge of Golf and Mindfulness

03:02 Navigating Life and Sobriety

05:54 Reflections on Early Sobriety

08:40 Childhood and Adoption

12:03 The Impact of Trauma

15:00 The Journey into Alcohol and Drugs

17:47 The First Experience with Alcohol

20:35 Consequences of Addiction

23:58 Life in the Cycle of Addiction

26:49 Incarceration and Its Lessons

29:31 The Turning Point to Recovery

37:40 The Journey to Rehab

40:36 Life in Rehab: Structure and Community

44:48 Transitioning to Life After Rehab

48:02 The Role of Responsibility in Recovery

55:43 Surrender and Acceptance in Recovery

01:00:56 Finding Freedom Through Vulnerability

01:08:28 The Power of Therapy and Community

01:12:56 Pursuing Passions: Golf and Personal Growth

In this conversation, Dolly shares her journey from loneliness and addiction to recovery and empowerment.

She discusses the creation of SOS Melbourne, a community aimed at supporting women in sobriety, and reflects on the impact of her upbringing and relationships on her drinking habits.

Dolly emphasizes the importance of faith in her recovery, the rewards of being a present parent, and the need for social spaces that do not revolve around alcohol.

The discussion highlights the growing movement against the normalization of drinking culture, particularly among mothers.

Takeaways

• Dolly created SOS Melbourne to fill a gap in sobriety support for women.
• She felt lonely in her recovery journey and sought community.
• Dolly's childhood experiences shaped her relationship with alcohol.
• Binge drinking was normalized in her social circles, complicating her perception of addiction.
• Finding love and starting a family prompted Dolly to reassess her drinking habits.
• COVID-19 intensified the pressures of 'mummy wine culture'.
• Dolly's faith played a crucial role in her recovery process.
• She emphasizes the importance of being a reliable parent post-recovery.
• Dolly's community events focus on socializing without alcohol.
• The movement against alcohol normalization is gaining momentum.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Setting the Scene

03:06 Creating a Supportive Community for Women in Sobriety

06:08 Personal Journey: Growing Up with Alcoholism

09:00 The Role of Alcohol in Social Life

11:53 Recognizing the Problem: A Turning Point

14:25 Navigating Recovery: AA and Beyond

15:46 Navigating Recovery and Support Systems

16:31 The Role of Faith in Personal Transformation

18:22 Finding Peace Through Faith

20:13 The Journey of Recovery and Relapse

21:49 Rediscovering Self and Purpose

23:14 The Impact of Sobriety on Parenting

25:43 Challenging Societal Norms Around Alcohol

27:33 Building a Supportive Community

29:22 Creating Meaningful Connections Without Alcohol

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