Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of religious trauma, spiritual abuse, toxic shame, and sexual abuse.
In this episode of Snarky Faith, Stuart talks with Rev. Heather Foy about the hidden costs of shame-based religion and the long road toward healing.
Heather is a Reverend, writer, and podcast host who ministers to the unchurched, questioning, and deconstructing. Drawing from her own experiences and the stories shared by guests on her podcast, she explores how deeply religious messaging can shape a person's understanding of themselves, their worth, and their place in the world.
The conversation begins with Heather's own background in religious spaces and the experiences that eventually led her into therapy and deconstruction. She reflects on the impact of being taught that humans are inherently broken, how those messages became woven into her identity, and the difficult work of untangling faith from shame.
Stuart and Heather discuss the survival mechanisms many people develop in religious environments, the moment when questioning church culture becomes questioning theology itself, and the challenges of rebuilding a sense of self after leaving high-control belief systems behind.
They also explore common themes that emerge from conversations with survivors of religious trauma, including recurring doctrines, harmful teachings, and the lasting effects of spiritual conditioning. Heather shares what people outside these experiences often misunderstand and why so many individuals struggle to trust themselves after years of being taught to distrust their own thoughts, emotions, and instincts.
The conversation ultimately turns toward hope, healing, and recovery. What happens when people stop defining themselves as broken? How do they learn to reconnect with themselves? And what possibilities emerge when spirituality is no longer built on shame?
Topics include:
• Religious trauma and spiritual abuse 
 • Toxic shame and self-worth 
 • Deconstruction and reconstruction 
 • Therapy and healing from harmful belief systems 
 • Identity after religion 
 • The theology of human brokenness 
 • Reclaiming personal agency 
 • Trusting yourself after faith transitions 
 • Finding hope beyond shame
About Heather:
Heather Foy is a Reverend, writer, and podcast host who ministers to the unchurched, questioning, and deconstructing. After decades in religious spaces, she now walks alongside those finding their own way beyond dogma and institutional religion. She writes for The Quollective and co-hosts The Awakening Podcast.  
 https://linktr.ee/Happyheathersmiles Big thanks to these outlets that make the Christian Crazy possible: 
 • Right Wing Watch 
 • Christian Nightmares 
 • Friendly Atheist
For more Snarky Faith: 
 🎙️ Snarky Faith website 
 📸 Instagram: @stuartdelony 
 ▶️ YouTube: @snarkyfaith 
 🩵 Bluesky: @snarkyfaith.bsky.social 
 📘 Facebook Group: facebook.com/snarkyfaith 
 ☕ Snarky Faith shirts and mugs: https://snarkyfaith.dashery.com/ Read the apocalypse responsibly: 
 📕 The Tribulation Survival Guide: https://amzn.to/4vnDcMl 
 🖍️ The Tribulation Survival Guide Coloring Book: https://amzn.to/4ePAk60
Check out other fantastic Quoircast partners: 
 The Heretic Happy Hour Podcast • Wild Olive • Jonathan Foster • The Church Needs Therapy • Honoring the Journey Podcast • Spiritual Brewpub • Bros Bibles & Beer • Liminal Living • The Social Jesus Project • I Was a Teenage Fundamentalist • The God Squad Pod • Radical Love Live • Second Cup with Keith • Unbelief Podcast • High Minds Collective • Evangelicalish • Beyond the Torch with Todd & Leslie Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of religious trauma, spiritual abuse, toxic shame, and sexual abuse. In this episode of Snarky Faith, Stuart talks with Rev. Heather Foy about the hidden costs of shame-based religion and the long road toward healing. Heather is a Reverend, writer, and podcast host who ministers to the unchurched, questioning, and deconstructing. Drawing from her own experiences and the stories shared by guests on her podcast, she explores how deeply religious messaging can shape a person's understanding of themselves, their worth, and their place in the world. The conversation begins with Heather's own background in religious spaces and the experiences that eventually led her into therapy and deconstruction. She reflects on the impact of being taught that humans are inherently broken, how those messages became woven into her identity, and the difficult work of untangling faith from shame. Stuart and Heather discuss the survival mechanisms many people develop in religious environments, the moment when questioning church culture becomes questioning theology itself, and the challenges of rebuilding a sense of self after leaving high-control belief systems behind. They also explore common themes that emerge from conversations with survivors of religious trauma, including recurring doctrines, harmful teachings, and the lasting effects of spiritual conditioning. Heather shares what people outside these experiences often misunderstand and why so many individuals struggle to trust themselves after years of being taught to distrust their own thoughts, emotions, and instincts. The conversation ultimately turns toward hope, healing, and recovery. What happens when people stop defining themselves as broken? How do they learn to reconnect with themselves? And what possibilities emerge when spirituality is no longer built on shame? Topics include: • Religious trauma and spiritual abuse • Toxic shame and self-worth • Deconstruction and reconstruction • Therapy and healing from harmful belief systems • Identity after religion • The theology of human brokenness • Reclaiming personal agency • Trusting yourself after faith transitions • Finding hope beyond shame About Heather: Heather Foy is a Reverend, writer, and podcast host who ministers to the unchurched, questioning, and deconstructing. After decades in religious spaces, she now walks alongside those finding their own way beyond dogma and institutional religion. She writes for The Quollective and co-hosts The Awakening Podcast. https://linktr.ee/Happyheathersmiles Big thanks to these outlets that make the Christian Crazy possible: • Right Wing Watch • Christian Nightmares • Friendly Atheist For more Snarky Faith: 🎙️ Snarky Faith website 📸 Instagram: @stuartdelony ▶️ YouTube: @snarkyfaith 🩵 Bluesky: @snarkyfaith.bsky.social 📘 Facebook Group: facebook.com/snarkyfaith ☕ Snarky Faith shirts and mugs: https://snarkyfaith.dashery.com/ Read the apocalypse responsibly: 📕 The Tribulation Survival Guide: https://amzn.to/4vnDcMl 🖍️ The Tribulation Survival Guide Coloring Book: https://amzn.to/4ePAk60 Check out other fantastic Quoircast partners: The Heretic Happy Hour Podcast • Wild Olive • Jonathan Foster • The Church Needs Therapy • Honoring the Journey Podcast • Spiritual Brewpub • Bros Bibles & Beer • Liminal Living • The Social Jesus Project • I Was a Teenage Fundamentalist • The God Squad Pod • Radical Love Live • Second Cup with Keith • Unbelief Podcast • High Minds Collective • Evangelicalish • Beyond the Torch with Todd & Leslie Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of religious trauma, spiritual abuse, toxic shame, and sexual abuse.
In this episode of Snarky Faith, Stuart talks with Rev. Heather Foy about the hidden costs of shame-based religion and the long road toward healing.
Heather is a Reverend, writer, and podcast host who ministers to the unchurched, questioning, and deconstructing. Drawing from her own experiences and the stories shared by guests on her podcast, she explores how deeply religious messaging can shape a person's understanding of themselves, their worth, and their place in the world.
The conversation begins with Heather's own background in religious spaces and the experiences that eventually led her into therapy and deconstruction. She reflects on the impact of being taught that humans are inherently broken, how those messages became woven into her identity, and the difficult work of untangling faith from shame.
Stuart and Heather discuss the survival mechanisms many people develop in religious environments, the moment when questioning church culture becomes questioning theology itself, and the challenges of rebuilding a sense of self after leaving high-control belief systems behind.
They also explore common themes that emerge from conversations with survivors of religious trauma, including recurring doctrines, harmful teachings, and the lasting effects of spiritual conditioning. Heather shares what people outside these experiences often misunderstand and why so many individuals struggle to trust themselves after years of being taught to distrust their own thoughts, emotions, and instincts.
The conversation ultimately turns toward hope, healing, and recovery. What happens when people stop defining themselves as broken? How do they learn to reconnect with themselves? And what possibilities emerge when spirituality is no longer built on shame?
Topics include:
• Religious trauma and spiritual abuse 
 • Toxic shame and self-worth 
 • Deconstruction and reconstruction 
 • Therapy and healing from harmful belief systems 
 • Identity after religion 
 • The theology of human brokenness 
 • Reclaiming personal agency 
 • Trusting yourself after faith transitions 
 • Finding hope beyond shame
About Heather:
Heather Foy is a Reverend, writer, and podcast host who ministers to the unchurched, questioning, and deconstructing. After decades in religious spaces, she now walks alongside those finding their own way beyond dogma and institutional religion. She writes for The Quollective and co-hosts The Awakening Podcast.&nbsp; 
 https://linktr.ee/Happyheathersmiles Big thanks to these outlets that make the Christian Crazy possible: 
 • Right Wing Watch 
 • Christian Nightmares 
 • Friendly Atheist
For more Snarky Faith: 
 🎙️ Snarky Faith website 
 📸 Instagram: @stuartdelony 
 ▶️ YouTube: @snarkyfaith 
 🩵 Bluesky: @snarkyfaith.bsky.social 
 📘 Facebook Group: facebook.com/snarkyfaith 
 ☕ Snarky Faith shirts and mugs: https://snarkyfaith.dashery.com/ Read the apocalypse responsibly: 
 📕 The Tribulation Survival Guide: https://amzn.to/4vnDcMl 
 🖍️ The Tribulation Survival Guide Coloring Book: https://amzn.to/4ePAk60
Check out other fantastic Quoircast partners: 
 The Heretic Happy Hour Podcast • Wild Olive • Jonathan Foster • The Church Needs Therapy • Honoring the Journey Podcast • Spiritual Brewpub • Bros Bibles &amp; Beer • Liminal Living • The Social Jesus Project • I Was a Teenage Fundamentalist • The God Squad Pod • Radical Love Live • Second Cup with Keith • Unbelief Podcast • High Minds Collective • Evangelicalish • Beyond the Torch with Todd &amp; Leslie Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com" rel="noopener noreferrer">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

When Faith Teaches You to Hate Yourself with Rev. Heather Foy

In this episode of Snarky Faith, Stuart talks with author K.D. McCrite (https://amzn.to/4xuMgBe) about faith, creativity, fear, and the complicated process of finding your voice after growing up in a highly religious culture.
Raised in the Ozarks, K.D. spent much of her childhood immersed in a world where obedience, religious expectations, and fear of the End Times shaped daily life. While she always knew she wanted to be a writer, that path often collided with messages about what was acceptable, what was sinful, and what God supposedly wanted from her.
Together, Stuart and K.D. explore the difference between fearing God and fearing religious systems, the emotional impact of growing up under constant warnings about judgment and the Great Tribulation, and how those experiences can shape a person's creativity long into adulthood.
They also discuss the realities of Christian publishing, the challenges of writing authentic characters within highly curated religious markets, and what happens when readers become more concerned with being uncomfortable than with whether a story is honest.
Along the way, they talk about small-town church culture, family expectations, the freedom that comes from writing without permission, and why storytelling can become a powerful tool for reclaiming identity after years of living inside someone else's script.
It's a thoughtful conversation about faith, fear, creativity, and the courage it takes to tell the truth. Big thanks to these outlets that make the Christian Crazy possible: 
 • Right Wing Watch 
 • Christian Nightmares 
 • Friendly Atheist
For more Snarky Faith: 
 🎙️ Snarky Faith website 
 📸 Instagram: @stuartdelony 
 ▶️ YouTube: @snarkyfaith 
 🩵 Bluesky: @snarkyfaith.bsky.social 
 📘 Facebook Group: facebook.com/snarkyfaith 
 ☕ Snarky Faith shirts and mugs: https://snarkyfaith.dashery.com/ Read the apocalypse responsibly: 
 📕 The Tribulation Survival Guide: https://amzn.to/4vnDcMl 
 🖍️ The Tribulation Survival Guide Coloring Book: https://amzn.to/4ePAk60
Check out other fantastic Quoircast partners: 
 The Heretic Happy Hour Podcast • Wild Olive • Jonathan Foster • The Church Needs Therapy • Honoring the Journey Podcast • Spiritual Brewpub • Bros Bibles & Beer • Liminal Living • The Social Jesus Project • I Was a Teenage Fundamentalist • The God Squad Pod • Radical Love Live • Second Cup with Keith • Unbelief Podcast • High Minds Collective • Evangelicalish • Beyond the Torch with Todd & Leslie Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Snarky Faith, Stuart talks with author K.D. McCrite (https://amzn.to/4xuMgBe) about faith, creativity, fear, and the complicated process of finding your voice after growing up in a highly religious culture. Raised in the Ozarks, K.D. spent much of her childhood immersed in a world where obedience, religious expectations, and fear of the End Times shaped daily life. While she always knew she wanted to be a writer, that path often collided with messages about what was acceptable, what was sinful, and what God supposedly wanted from her. Together, Stuart and K.D. explore the difference between fearing God and fearing religious systems, the emotional impact of growing up under constant warnings about judgment and the Great Tribulation, and how those experiences can shape a person's creativity long into adulthood. They also discuss the realities of Christian publishing, the challenges of writing authentic characters within highly curated religious markets, and what happens when readers become more concerned with being uncomfortable than with whether a story is honest. Along the way, they talk about small-town church culture, family expectations, the freedom that comes from writing without permission, and why storytelling can become a powerful tool for reclaiming identity after years of living inside someone else's script. It's a thoughtful conversation about faith, fear, creativity, and the courage it takes to tell the truth. Big thanks to these outlets that make the Christian Crazy possible: • Right Wing Watch • Christian Nightmares • Friendly Atheist For more Snarky Faith: 🎙️ Snarky Faith website 📸 Instagram: @stuartdelony ▶️ YouTube: @snarkyfaith 🩵 Bluesky: @snarkyfaith.bsky.social 📘 Facebook Group: facebook.com/snarkyfaith ☕ Snarky Faith shirts and mugs: https://snarkyfaith.dashery.com/ Read the apocalypse responsibly: 📕 The Tribulation Survival Guide: https://amzn.to/4vnDcMl 🖍️ The Tribulation Survival Guide Coloring Book: https://amzn.to/4ePAk60 Check out other fantastic Quoircast partners: The Heretic Happy Hour Podcast • Wild Olive • Jonathan Foster • The Church Needs Therapy • Honoring the Journey Podcast • Spiritual Brewpub • Bros Bibles & Beer • Liminal Living • The Social Jesus Project • I Was a Teenage Fundamentalist • The God Squad Pod • Radical Love Live • Second Cup with Keith • Unbelief Podcast • High Minds Collective • Evangelicalish • Beyond the Torch with Todd & Leslie Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Snarky Faith, Stuart talks with author K.D. McCrite (https://amzn.to/4xuMgBe) about faith, creativity, fear, and the complicated process of finding your voice after growing up in a highly religious culture.
Raised in the Ozarks, K.D. spent much of her childhood immersed in a world where obedience, religious expectations, and fear of the End Times shaped daily life. While she always knew she wanted to be a writer, that path often collided with messages about what was acceptable, what was sinful, and what God supposedly wanted from her.
Together, Stuart and K.D. explore the difference between fearing God and fearing religious systems, the emotional impact of growing up under constant warnings about judgment and the Great Tribulation, and how those experiences can shape a person's creativity long into adulthood.
They also discuss the realities of Christian publishing, the challenges of writing authentic characters within highly curated religious markets, and what happens when readers become more concerned with being uncomfortable than with whether a story is honest.
Along the way, they talk about small-town church culture, family expectations, the freedom that comes from writing without permission, and why storytelling can become a powerful tool for reclaiming identity after years of living inside someone else's script.
It's a thoughtful conversation about faith, fear, creativity, and the courage it takes to tell the truth. Big thanks to these outlets that make the Christian Crazy possible: 
 • Right Wing Watch 
 • Christian Nightmares 
 • Friendly Atheist
For more Snarky Faith: 
 🎙️ Snarky Faith website 
 📸 Instagram: @stuartdelony 
 ▶️ YouTube: @snarkyfaith 
 🩵 Bluesky: @snarkyfaith.bsky.social 
 📘 Facebook Group: facebook.com/snarkyfaith 
 ☕ Snarky Faith shirts and mugs: https://snarkyfaith.dashery.com/ Read the apocalypse responsibly: 
 📕 The Tribulation Survival Guide: https://amzn.to/4vnDcMl 
 🖍️ The Tribulation Survival Guide Coloring Book: https://amzn.to/4ePAk60
Check out other fantastic Quoircast partners: 
 The Heretic Happy Hour Podcast • Wild Olive • Jonathan Foster • The Church Needs Therapy • Honoring the Journey Podcast • Spiritual Brewpub • Bros Bibles &amp; Beer • Liminal Living • The Social Jesus Project • I Was a Teenage Fundamentalist • The God Squad Pod • Radical Love Live • Second Cup with Keith • Unbelief Podcast • High Minds Collective • Evangelicalish • Beyond the Torch with Todd &amp; Leslie Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com" rel="noopener noreferrer">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Finding Your Voice with KD McCrite

Snarky Faith 6/21/16 A rundown of the topic of moral relativism – the view that moral judgments are true or false only relative to some particular standpoint. The recent Barna group on Millenials has Christians freaking out about the future of the faith. Is there hope in the changing landscape of faith in America culture? We think so. Join …

Snarky Faith 6/21/16 A rundown of the topic of moral relativism – the view that moral judgments are true or false only relative to some particular standpoint. The recent Barna group on Millenials has Christians freaking out about the future of the faith. Is there hope in the changing landscape of faith in America culture? We think so. Join …

Snarky Faith 6/21/16 A rundown of the topic of moral relativism –&nbsp;the view that&nbsp;moral judgments&nbsp;are true or false only relative to some particular standpoint.&nbsp;The recent Barna group on Millenials has Christians freaking out about the future of the faith. Is there hope in the changing landscape of faith in America culture? We think so. Join …

Moral Relativism

A rundown of the Franklin Graham and the Christian tradition of throwing temper tantrums. When rage is misdirected, it quickly becomes something that's far from righteousness. Call it what you want, but some Christian leaders are in need of anger management. Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A rundown of the Franklin Graham and the Christian tradition of throwing temper tantrums. When rage is misdirected, it quickly becomes something that's far from righteousness. Call it what you want, but some Christian leaders are in need of anger management. Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A rundown of the Franklin Graham and the Christian tradition of throwing temper tantrums. When rage is misdirected, it quickly becomes something that's far from righteousness. Call it what you want, but some Christian leaders are in need of anger management. Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com" rel="noopener noreferrer">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Graham Rage

A rundown of the Trump: the Orange Messiah and his courtship with the religious right. The new messiah looks little like Jesus and yet we see Christians flocking to him for all the wrong reasons. Call it what you want, but some Christians are in need of a bit of a wakeup call (and maybe therapy). Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A rundown of the Trump: the Orange Messiah and his courtship with the religious right. The new messiah looks little like Jesus and yet we see Christians flocking to him for all the wrong reasons. Call it what you want, but some Christians are in need of a bit of a wakeup call (and maybe therapy). Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A rundown of the&nbsp;Trump: the Orange Messiah and his courtship with the religious right. The new messiah looks little like Jesus and yet we see Christians flocking to him for all the wrong reasons.&nbsp;Call it what you want, but some Christians are in need of a bit of a wakeup call (and maybe therapy). Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com" rel="noopener noreferrer">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The Orange Messiah

A rundown of the NC HB2 Bathroom bill along with an interview with Jim Kast-Keat, the curator of the 30 Seconds or Less project. What does faith and HB2 have to do with Christianity? Plenty. Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more.  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A rundown of the NC HB2 Bathroom bill along with an interview with Jim Kast-Keat, the curator of the 30 Seconds or Less project. What does faith and HB2 have to do with Christianity? Plenty. Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A rundown of the NC HB2 Bathroom bill along with an interview with Jim Kast-Keat, the curator of the 30 Seconds or Less project. What does faith and HB2 have to do with Christianity? Plenty. Join us as we skewer through life, culture and spirituality. Tune into find out more.&nbsp; Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See <a href="https://pcm.adswizz.com" rel="noopener noreferrer">pcm.adswizz.com</a> for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

NC Bathrooms and 30 Seconds or Less

Hosted by Stuart Delony, Snarky Faith cuts through the noise of American Christianity with wit, reason, and a little righteous anger. It’s where satire meets soul work—a space for skeptics, seekers, and the spiritually homeless. Each episode dives into the absurdities of faith, politics, and culture while holding onto the radical, justice-centered teachings of Jesus. No dogma. No easy answers. Just honesty, humor, and the occasional heresy.

www.snarkyfaith.com

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Hosted by Stuart Delony, Snarky Faith cuts through the noise of American Christianity with wit, reason, and a little righteous anger. It’s where satire meets soul work—a space for skeptics, seekers, and the spiritually homeless. Each episode dives into the absurdities of faith, politics, and culture while holding onto the radical, justice-centered teachings of Jesus. No dogma. No easy answers. Just honesty, humor, and the occasional heresy. www.snarkyfaith.com

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