With Scotland and France mandating masks in schools, there's a small chance Sausage Johnson will mandate it in England. Without schools getting safer quickly the R number will decline slowly. Plus, the latest polls look good for Biden. *Swearing*

The Times have a big scoop: national lockdown announced on Monday for 1 month, but The Torygraph are leading with Tier 4! Hopefully the sausage will go for the big lockdown and save many lives. Meanwhile Biden goes to Minnesota. *Swearing*

Sir David King suggests the UK government response has been a criminal mistake, and a robust Test, Trace and Isolate strategy would have limited deaths to 1000. Meanwhile, Biden's routes to 270 electoral college votes look good. *Swearing*

Tory MPs in the North are feeling the heat from their constituents, so they wrote a letter to the meaty turd. Meanwhile, Biden is expanding the map as more than 62 million votes have already been cast in the US election. *Swearing*

We go long with guest appearances by Brad Pitt, Porchoice, the Secretary General of WHO, Christina Pagel and Anthony Costello. Can Biden win Texas (and achieve a historic landslide)? Dr Richard Murray at University of Houston says yes! *Swearing*

Trump had a cohesive line of attack in Thursday's debate, but was it enough to slow Joe's momentum? *Swearing*

John Edmunds outlines why Sausage Johnson's three tiers approach will fail and suggests tens of thousands of Covid deaths by the end of the year. Plus, Starmer plays a blinder and Giuliani is exposed by Borat. *Swearing*

With Wales and the Republic of Ireland joining Northern Ireland in lockdowns, England is late again. Plus, in the US Trump goes crazy and people are voting early in unprecedented numbers; 29,600,000+ already! *Swearing*

Oh Carolina! I have looked again at North Carolina and slotted it neatly in Biden's dodgy old column. Meanwhile Jacinda Ardern wins a historic landslide and Michael Gove makes everyone feel sick. *Swearing

Trump acts strangely for a president while Biden attracts more viewers and raised far more money in September. Meanwhile Burnham isn't taking any nonsense from Sausage Johnson. *Swearing"