SOL Affirmations with Karega & Felicia

There is something special about the process. It is yours. It is ongoing. It is present. It is ever. It is, always. It is… - Dr. Felicia Gangloff-Bailey

Felicia and Karega have come to view September very differently. As they come to year four without their daughter Kamaiu Sol Bailey earthside with them, the reality of the time and conditions in which grief exist become ever more present. While Felicia still wrestles with the process and how different the years look as they change, Karega has excepted the month of September of one of Miracles and Wonder. Listen in as they co-discover how time has changed how they move in the world and how they honor their first born.

Just Because Someone is Grown, Doesn't Mean They're Growing. One more time. Just Because Someone is Grown, Doesn't Mean They're Growing.  That is the challenge Felicia has found herself in with her mother, and Karega has found himself in with a loved one. In reality, we all have found ourselves presented with the challenge of loving someone who isn't necessarily on the same trajectory of growth, wellness, or knowing as you. It is in this moment of investigation that we all join Karega & Felicia as we work through just how to hold and make space for those who challenge our growth.

After a clip of Felicia sharing a story about Kamali and Kamaiu goes viral, she takes a moment to reflect in the power of what vulnerability and the ability to share her truth does for her healing process. Sharing amongst community give us the opportunity to not only grieve, but to build, to reflect, to hope, and to love.

Sometimes you need to reframe the reframe, and that lesson comes bright and early on a Monday. For Felicia it came in the form of comparison. We all have those moments when we wonder why we aren't where that other person is, EVEN if it's someone we love dearly. It is when we sit in those feelings and those thoughts that we are given the opportunity to process and move forward in them and find who we are. Is it just comparison? Is it a different form a grief? Is it all of the above and more?

In potty training Kamali, Felicia and Karega find new knowings in the concept of "being stubborn" and how one learns. How often do we, as a society, dismiss stubborn children or stubborn people as not knowing or not learning just because they are not doing things with the ease or expectation that we would like them to?

How does one process the loss of someone who still had so much more to tell? Of a loss that feels too soon? Karega asks this as he processes the loss of one of his former students from DC, Troy, to gun violence. Troy, like so many of Karega's students, taught Karega just as much as he taught them. There was so much more to them than people were willing to see or understand, but Troy was able to communicate it all through poetry. Poetry that sits with and influences Karega to this day unfortunately now, through his absence.

Where does wellness stand at the intersection of Hope and Hopelessness? It's what helps you move forward. Today, Karega and Felicia discuss the the wholeness of wellness. What it means, where it has found them in their journey of grief, and for Karega, why it is fundamental to him connecting with other men in their journey with not only grief, but in healing. Wellness is the New Genre.

As Felicia reflects on her now 36th birthday, she recalls what the past few birthdays have looked like even as she has shared this space with you all. The changes that are naturally occurring in life have made their way and even the moments of celebration look different. While discussing that moment, allows to Karega reflect on a trip back east that he took with his father just before his dad's 70th birthday. It all lends itself to the question of how do the processes of life change our outlook on love, growth, life and celebration?

An old school Gospel playlist (not super old-school, we're talking early 2000s) has Felicia and Karega honing in on the many facets of gratitude. What does gratitude look like and how does it change as we change? What is it like to find our way BACK TO GRATITUDE when we feel like there has been absolutely nothing to be grateful for?

Kamali has hit her tremendous 2s in full force and are CHALLENGING Karega and Felicia. Yes, we are fully aware she is a toddler, hence the challenge AND where this conversation meets us. What does one do with the frustration that comes with handling the challenges that come our way and in how does CONTROL play into the situation? While Karega and Felicia frame this conversation in the scope of parenthood, you do not need to be a parent to pick up these gems!