Welcome to Some Topic, the podcast where two dangerously underqualified hosts tackle everything from politics to paranormal squirrels — armed with caffeine, sarcasm, and absolutely no research.
In this chaotic first episode, Nick and Sam stumble through a five-minute intro that somehow spirals into crack economics, raccoon philosophy, and an existential debate about Toy Story.
Nothing is off-limits. Nothing makes sense.
And yes — this is the heavily redacted version.
00:00 – PSA Warning & Setup Chaos
Nick and Sam try (and fail) to start the podcast while roasting each other over the intro script.
03:45 – “Heavily Redacted Version”
Paper quality, printer quality, and friendship quality — in that order.
07:30 – The Paper Cut & The Hand Names Debate
They name their hands Becky and Sue. Things escalate fast.
12:10 – Crack Economics 101
Goldfish on crack, entrepreneurship, and how crackheads are business geniuses.
16:40 – Reading the Intro… Kind Of
Grammar debates, Internet Explorer insults, and “two voices with microphones.”
22:50 – Philosophical Squirrels & Paranormal Rodents
Sam defends his raccoon obsession. Nick gets grammar PTSD.
29:20 – The Library of Alexandria (Raccoon Edition)
They “approach each topic like two raccoons with a torch.” Enlightenment ensues.
35:00 – Grammar Wars: The Comma Strikes Back
Nick explains commas. Sam ignores commas. Tension builds.
41:00 – Falling With Style (Toy Story Tangent)
Buzz Lightyear, Buddha, and mental breakdowns collide in one monologue.
47:45 – Listener Discretion & Tree Huggers
“Relax your chakras and yell at a tree.” Legitimate podcast advice.
52:30 – The Philosophy of Comedy
“This is not journalism. This is not education. This is play.”
56:15 – Proper Intro Reading (Finally)
Sam performs the finished intro like it’s Shakespeare with caffeine.
59:10 – Closing Bit: Surveillance Squirrels & Black Coffee
A poetic send-off featuring unpaid interns, HR problems, and existential raccoons.
01:00:12 – End Scene
Stay caffeinated. Stay skeptical. Keep the surveillance squirrels guessing.
👉 Subscribe for more unfiltered nonsense every week.
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