Something's gotta give

This past year I have been mastering silence and preservation. I felt called to share what this journey has looked like for me so far. I also just missed doing this and wanted to catch up with my tribe! 

The 3 musketeer friend dynamic often looks like two people whom share the closer bond and a plus one that will never have the same bond as the two best friends in the group. The third friend will often fight for the same amount of love and affection and in the end may feel inadequate. 

Intrusive thoughts can be our worst enemies. You have to get out of your head and into your body. In other words, MOVE! It's the best thing you can do for yourself if you suffer from depression or anxiety. 

In honor of my two year sobriety anniversary, I felt called to share  an experience that kept reoccurring during my obsessive drinking phase. I have so many horror stories and I felt called to tell the worst nightmare of all to highlight how far I have come since that time in my life. We all make mistakes, what matters is the person you become after learning from them. I couldn't be more proud of the woman that I am today. I also have so much love and understanding for the girl I was at that point in my life. 

The first interview I have done on my podcast platform and what a great one. I work with Rose, a sweet young girl, and I felt compelled to hear her story after sharing with me briefly that she had to grow up quick. 

We dive deep into her upbringing and how that has molded her current reality. Discussing sexual assault, promiscuity, abandonment amongst other topics. She is actively working to choose a desirable future- and I am more then happy this platform made her feel safe enough to allow the truth that's been hidden to come to the surface. 

I dive deep into my experience sleeping at a gas station during a roadtrip across country. This was very traumatic and my inner child kept telling me to share my story. Healing can be as simple as telling and honoring a story. 

Sharing the experiences I endured as a child is a part of my healing process. What I endured during the fourth that I had repressed for years kept coming to the surface, specifically in the month of February. Expressing my truth is a way of me honoring what my inner child kept communicating to me. Not only is the story a way of sustaining a relationship with my inner child - it is a powerful confidence building practice as well. We all have stories and they deserve to be heard. Thank you for listening to mine. 

The best place to meet your most authentic self is during the practice of stillness. The greatest ideas stem from listening to your inner voice, your inner child. Today's society gives praise to having motion but we neglect the power that comes from being still and all the wonders that are born from that practice. Tend to the slower things in life that can be a little more difficult, which is why they are often time the most rewarding once the fruit of your labor comes to fruition. 

Most people who can light up a room by their very presence, have the darkest stories. It is through the dark times, they learn how to be someone who chooses to shine. Being a light worker can be a daunting task when you have not learned how to fill your cup before filling others. It is vital for balance to be mastered to be the act of service most light beings strive to be. 

I was called to do a fast from shopping January and February. Through that time period I realized that I buy clothes to feel love. I was taught that love is measured through materialistic things. How often and how much I received through out my childhood, was how I viewed the amount of love someone had for me. Which led me to always looking to buy something new in my adult hood. Yes, retail therapy is nice but like everything else in this life- understanding WHY I enjoy something allows me to choose if I am doing this from a place of lack or abundance. Realizing the truth behind my attachment to materialistic things, specifically clothes in my case, was a search for me to receive love.