Thank you for tuning in to another episode, we're continuing the boundaries conversation!
In this episode we’re diving deeper into what to be & do before, during and after setting boundaries.
Here are your action steps if you feel called:
Step 1 – Negotiable, non-negotiables & consequence - Be clear on your non-negotiables, negotiables and consequences before you present your boundary.
Step 2 – Reflect on your role in the relationship before and after, how do you want the other person to feel, how do you want to feel? How will you return to your center and the present moment regardless of what happens? How will you stay strong with your boundaries in the beginning stages?
Step 3 – Practice makes progress – are you willing to practice with a safe person or in front of a mirror and speaking out loud to make boundary setting familiar? Communicating new boundaries takes practice, so planning and practice are key in the beginning.
Step 4 – Communicating boundaries: (I invite you to listen to episode 13 - [The Center] - The Observer, before communicating your boundaries). Communicate the boundary in a way that you would like a boundary to be presented.
o Desire: Communicate your love and desire for a healthy relationship and why this conversation is important.
o Feelings: Keep your focus on YOUR feelings and behavior and use “I feel” statements. Stay clear of blaming, shaming, and making judgments.
o Request: Make a simple and clear request.
o Focus: It’s important to remember to focus on how YOU will begin to respond differently in the future instead of focusing on the other person.
o Consequence: Express the consequence if necessary and remember to never express a consequence you aren’t ready to use.
o Love: Remind them of the love and why you’re setting this boundary. The more clearly you communicate the better you set yourself and your relationship up for successful change.
Step 5 – Sitting with the discomfort & returning to your center & the present moment
Step 6 – Reflect & journal on your experience.
What resonated with you and what are you going to be & do about it?
I know how challenging setting boundaries can be, so If you’d like support with setting boundaries or practicing setting boundaries, please feel free to reach out to me here: https://www.soulsearching.space/widget/bookings/boundary-support