IN a special bonus podcast, Emily talks to Grief Encounters hosts Sasha and Venetia about “starting again” after a series of  painful losses, all accounted beautifully in her new memoir Everybody Died, So I Got a Dog. The books jarring title is completely indicative to the tone of the conversation, as Emily refuses to speak gently about the painful realities of grief.  Now, she is the only survivor of her immediate family and in her interview with Sasha and Venetia, she speaks in great detail of how this strange reality came to be. 

The Deans are a genuinely extraordinary family. Her Dad was a famous TV personality and her mother an actress. Her relationship with both of them throughout the years was turbulent at times. “It was a peripatetic, slightly unstable childhood. Lot’s of bohemian artists, who were great fun to be around, but if you wan’t fish fingers on the table at 5pm, they’re not your people.” In contrast to this, Emily’s relationship with her sister Rachael meant more than anything in the world to her “I called my sister my lighthouse, she was home.”

Emily’s whole world turned completely on its head in December 2011. Rachael suddenly became very ill, and passed away less than a month later from an aggressive form of cancer. In 2014, her mother was diagnosed with MND, passing away a year later, shortly followed by the death of her father a few months after. Within three short years she was completely on her own. 

“There’s something about the family you have grown up, in whatever form that takes, that defines you. It is who you are. “ I had moments where I would go to ring my sister, with something funny, or if I had passed somewhere. And  then you’d get this sinking feeling of I’ve got no one to tell, no one understands this”

Emily is a fascinating character, and an incredibly smart and intelligent woman who’s absolute love for her sister is still incredibly evident eight years on from her loss. Her conversation sparked many tears, huge moments of laughter, and that was within the first 10 minutes alone. 

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