Santa's Little Helper gets stuck in the school vents. Principal Skinner gets fired and Ned takes over.

It's the hundredth episode of The Simpsons!

And it's not very good.

Bart becomes the sole heir to Monty's vast fortune. But he must pay the terrible price of rejecting his family forever. That sounds dark, but it's actually very funny.

Andrew and Tim discuss a timely feature in GQ and mumble about NFTs some more.

Bart wins a full-grown African elephant in a radio competition. Homer entirely fails to capitalise on this development.

Elsewhere, we go on about Danny Elfman's torso.

Ned Flanders treats Homer to a football game, kick-starting an unlikely bromance between the two neighbours. But Flanders' nerves start to fray when he realises how annoying Homer can be.

Andrew and Tim discuss friendship, food politics, religion and the rise of NFTs.

The one where Homer goes into space, as a token blue collar chair moistener.

But the mission goes wrong, due to potato chips and ants. Luckily, an inanimate carbon rod is at hand to spare humanity's insectoid enslavement.

Lisa has high expectations for the talking Malibu Stacy doll. But rather than inspiring rhetoric, her new toy delivers a stream of sexist drivel, and she resolves to create a better role model for young girls.

Andrew and Tim return refreshed from their break and get their ugly pie hooks into a new season.

Apu poisons Homer twice with rancid food, leading to his dismissal from the Kwik-E-Mart. They work together to help him recover from his trauma. 

Andrew and Tim negotiate a minefield of sensitivity around the representation of Indian culture in the Simpsons. 

After a tiresome trip to the box factory, Bart accidentally becomes famous.

But, according to John Updike, celebrity is a mask that eats into the face...

Also - exciting news about a trainer that looks a bit like Snowball 2.

A cat burglar terrorises Springfield, stealing everything that's dear to them. 

Homer forms a vigilante group to apprehend the villain, but they're soon seeking world domination.

Andrew and Tim avoid important current events stories by mulling over amusing Simpsons-related news items.

Marge gets the hots for the slots. Not in that way.

Mr Burns boosts the town economy by opening a casino. But it drives him insane so he bins it.

Andrew and Tim continue their halting re-entry into post-lockdown UK society. But we cut all that because the episode came in too long.