Stethoscopes and Strollers

Hey Hubby,

Yep, I said it. This one’s for you. I know most of my episodes are directed toward Physician moms, but this time I’m talking directly to the husbands.

Not to criticize. Not to complain. But to invite you into a deeper understanding of what your wife is going through right now.

Because when you became a dad, everything changed. Not just for your wife, but for you too. And in this season, when the babies are young and the days are long, it’s so easy to feel disconnected, confused, or unsure of how to really show up for her.

So I’m sharing what I wish my own husband had known in those early years… and what your wife probably wishes you knew too.

This episode is not about blame. It’s about connection.

Here’s what I talk about in this episode:

• Why the version of motherhood you think you know might be outdated (and why that matters)
  
  
  
• The invisible pressure your wife is under (and what you’re not seeing)
  
  
  
• How your childhood is shaping your marriage and what to do about it
  
  
  
• Why your wife’s body isn’t “back to normal” and what she needs from you around intimacy
  
  
  
• Real ways to show up and lighten her mental load without being asked

This is a mindset shift, not a to-do list. And if you let it, this episode might just change everything.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey doc,

This one might sting, but it’s worth staying for.

In this episode I am calling out (with love) the high-achieving physician moms who don’t realize the pattern that you’re part of: weaponized perfectionism. Not because you’re mean or controlling. But because you’re capable. Efficient. An intelligent, successful physician mom who knows how to get things done.

But when those same traits spill into your marriage, they can unintentionally block the very support you’re craving.

In this episode, let’s talk about:

• The ways some of us unintentionally sabotage shared responsibility
• How the word “let” reveals power dynamics we don’t always see
• The difference between “letting” him help vs trusting him to lead
• The hidden consequences for your kids (and your future marriage)
• And one big question I want you to think about: Are you weaponizing perfection against yourself?

You didn’t ask to carry it all, but you also didn’t stop yourself from picking it up.  

Let him rise.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey doc, 

This one’s personal.
In honor of Father’s Day (even though we don’t “do” the holiday), I wanted to take a moment to honor the man who made this podcast possible, my husband, Adé.

Not because he edits the episodes or runs the backend (he doesn’t). But because of the stories I share here and the tools I teach, they come from real work, and a real partnership that wasn’t always this way.

This is my thank you to him.
For being willing.
For doing the work.
For loving me enough to grow with me.
And for letting his story be part of this movement to help physician moms build marriages that actually work.

In this special episode you’ll hear:

• Why none of this would be possible without him
• The personal rule I follow before ever sharing our story
• How his growth made room for mine
• And why healing together is the only kind I believe in
  
  

To Adé, thank you.

And to every partner doing the work quietly in the background, this one’s for you too.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey doc,

In this episode of ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨, I’m revisiting a live I did called: "The partner you thought you had😩 How gender roles turned your progressive hubby into a 1950s a-hole"

Because let’s be honest: even the most modern, educated, emotionally intelligent men can slide into outdated gender roles once kids come into the picture.

You’re a physician. A mother. A leader. So why do you feel like you’re living a version of your mother’s or grandmother’s life, except now, you're expected to do it all, with a career too?

This conversation is not about blame. It’s about:

• Why “progressive” partners still default to traditional gender roles
• What socialization, family modeling, and unseen expectations have to do with it
• How resentment builds, even in good marriages
• What to do when the dynamic at home doesn’t feel like a partnership anymore

You didn’t marry the wrong man. And you’re not wrong for being exhausted.

Let’s talk about the invisible pressures, the unspoken assumptions, and the tools you can use to make a change without waiting for him to magically “get it.”

Listen to Episode 23 Spouse Skeptic? Navigating Au Pair Objections for Physician Moms to find some of the communication tools that I discussed in this episode.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc ,

This month, I’m doing something a little different. Every episode of Stethoscopes and Strollers in June is for the dads.
Not because they deserve a standing ovation.
But because they’re part of the story. Your story.

And I know, this might bring up some feelings.
Especially if you’ve been carrying more than your share of the load.
Especially if it feels like you’ve had to do the emotional labor for everyone, including the person you thought would be your partner.

In this episode, I’m talking about what I now understand to be the real issue behind so much of the frustration I felt in early parenthood:
The expectation gap.

The quiet but powerful beliefs we carry, about how motherhood would feel, what our partner would do, and what we should be able to handle.
Where those expectations come from.
And why they often go unspoken until we’re already at our breaking point.

This isn’t about letting anyone off the hook.
It’s about giving you the insight (and tools) to make change — not just in your marriage, but in your household, your nervous system, and your legacy.

Inside, I share:
 🔹 What I expected from my husband… and why it wasn’t fair (or shared)
 🔹 Why we confuse socialization with instinct, and how that skews our view of “good parenting”
 🔹 What finally helped us start communicating for real
 🔹 And how this one shift can change what your kids learn about love and partnership

This one’s for you if you’ve ever felt like:
“I shouldn’t have to ask.”
“I’ve already said this a thousand times.”
Or, “I don’t even know how we got here.”

You’re not alone.
And it can get better.

🎧 Let’s unpack the load, the gap, and the truth, without yelling. (Promise.)

Listen to Episode 33 Debunking the Myth of Maternal Instinct: Why Education trumps 'Intuition' in Parenting

Listen to Episode 42 Behind the Scenes: A Raw Conversation with My Husband About Our Early Parenthood Journey

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc—

Let’s talk about what it really costs to perform strength.

Dr. Tolulope Olabintan is a family medicine physician, a private practice owner, and a woman of deep faith. She’s also someone who—like so many of us—was raised to be “the strong one.” The Proverbs 31 woman. The helper. The one who keeps going, no matter what.

Because “strong women” don’t sit still.
They endure. Power through. Serve.

But what happens when that identity clashes with your actual humanity?

In this conversation, Dr. Tolu shares her story of postpartum hypertension, pregnancy complications, hospital escapes (yes, literal), and learning to stop performing the role of the unshakable woman.

We talk about:

• How she envisioned herself as a virtuous woman in motherhood — and how that image evolved
• The cost of silence when systems take advantage of your sacrifice
• How postpartum hypertension, fatigue, and guilt finally led her to rewire everything
• What it means to teach others how to love and support you

Dr. Tolu’s story is full of grace, growth, and hard-won clarity.
And you’re going to feel every bit of it.

Dr. Tolulope Olabintan, MD, FAAFP, DipABLM is a Board-Certified Family Physician, Board certified with American Board of Lifestyle Medicine, and a Fellow of the American Academy of Family Physicians. She also completed a Women’s Health Fellowship and is a certified HIV specialist by the American Academy of HIV Medicine. She is fondly called by her patients as "Dr. O."

Dr. O is also the owner and CEO of Livingspring Family Medical Center, a primary care center located in Mansfield, Texas. She has over 13 years of medical experience. She helps patients live long and well as she believes the quantity of life is just as important as the quality of life. She places emphasis on lifestyle changes that help patients thrive throughout life. Furthermore, Dr. O is a life-enthusiast, a Christian, wife, and mom who enjoys good cuisine and can’t get enough of the colors teal and orange.

For more information about Dr. O, you can visit her website and connect with her on Facebook, follow on Instagram, connect on Linkedin and subscribe to her YouTube channel

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

What happens when you’re a military surgeon, a new mom, and a woman navigating two male-dominated worlds — all at once?

This week, I sat down with Dr. Amy Vertrees — a trauma surgeon, Army veteran, and mom of two — who knows what it’s like to deliver babies, build a career, and serve her country… all while navigating early motherhood.

We talk about:

• What changed her mind about having children after a decade of marriage
• The real story behind being pregnant during surgical residency
• Leaving an 8-month-old behind for deployment — and what helped her cope
• How she moved from perfectionism to presence in her parenting
• Her message for every Physician mom who’s ever felt guilty for working or leaving
  
  
  

If you’ve ever felt torn between your calling and your children — this one will stay with you.

You don’t have to be in the room to still be raising them.

You don’t have to be everything, all the time, to be enough.

And you’re allowed to show up in motherhood your way — even if it looks nothing like the script you were handed.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

✨ Stethoscopes and Strollers just turned ONE. ✨

One year. Over 60 episodes. Incredible guests. 18 five-star reviews. A global top 5% ranking — and a deeply aligned space that continues to grow week after week.

This week’s episode is a little different. It’s a celebration. A reflection. A reminder of what’s possible when you follow that small voice that says, I think I’m supposed to do this.

In this episode, I’m sharing:

🎙️ How the podcast went from idea to launch in just six weeks
🎙️ Why having an HQ for your voice matters (especially beyond social media)
🎙️ What this platform means to me — and what I want it to mean to you
🎙️ Why your reviews, shares, and messages really matter (and yes, I’m asking you to leave one!)

And maybe most importantly — I want this episode to light something in you.
Not to start a podcast (unless that’s your thing) — but to start whatever’s calling you. To take the idea that’s been sitting inside you, and act on it.

Because this podcast didn’t just happen.
It happened because I decided it would.
And it’s now reaching Physician moms across the world because you continue to listen, rate, and share.

Let’s celebrate what we’ve built together.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc —

Mother’s Day is coming up. And whether you're excited, dreading it, or just… indifferent, I want you to hear this clearly:

You deserve what you want for Mother’s Day.

If you want brunch and balloons — I hope you get them.
 If you want a quiet day to yourself with no one touching you, asking you for anything, or expecting you to perform joy — I hope you get that too.

Let this episode be your reminder that:

✔ You don’t need to celebrate Mother’s Day the way others think you should
 ✔ Wanting solitude doesn’t make you a bad mom
 ✔ It’s okay to feel conflicting things — joy, guilt, relief, longing — all at once
 ✔ You deserve a day that feels like yours — even if it doesn’t make sense to anyone else

Happy early Mother’s Day, Doc. However you choose to spend it, I hope it feels like yours.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc —

So… are you a Meghan or a Mindy?

This episode was inspired by With Love, Meghan on Netflix — and one very honest moment between Meghan, Duchess of Sussex and her guest, Mindy Kaling.

Meghan? Fully in her element: cooking, entertaining, feeding people with joy.
 Mindy? Fully supportive — and also like, “Yeah, I pay someone for that.”

Both women were showing up with clarity. And that got me thinking:
 Why do so many Physician moms feel like they have to pick a side — and then explain it to everyone?

Here’s what I’m unpacking in this episode:

🔸 Why your joy doesn’t have to look like someone else’s
🔸 The difference between inspiration and pressure
🔸 How burnout can dim even the things we usually love
🔸 And why standing firm in your identity — whether in motherhood or medicine — matters more than ever

This isn’t an episode about choosing between the soft life and outsourcing.
 It’s a reminder that you get to decide what kind of life feels good to you — and you don’t have to apologize for it.

🎧 Tune in now, and send this to the Physician mom in your life who needs permission to stop performing and start owning who she is.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya