Still Becoming with Katrina Oliver: Thoughts of a Therapist

Ever finish a full day and still feel like you should be doing more? I share the moment I caught myself wondering whether to add a continuing-ed podcast or a Spanish lesson to dinner prep, and what it taught me about the self-improvement trap.

For many high-achieving women, self-improvement starts as something hopeful and slowly becomes a job that never ends. I talk about why this happens, what it costs us, and how to tell growth that feels authentic from growth that feels like pressure. I also share why I lowered my reading goal this year and a small practice to try this week.

This is the final episode of season 1. I’m taking the winter to rest and plan season 2, which will include guest conversations. Have a topic or guest idea? Message me on Instagram at @counselorkatrina

You are not behind. You are not too much. You are still becoming.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how motherhood doesn’t just change you once.

It changes you when your babies are born. Then again when they start school. And again when they need you differently, when your own interests change, when you realize the version of yourself you’ve been living as doesn’t quite fit anymore.

I’m in one of those seasons right now.

My boys are getting older, and I’m noticing that I’m asking some of those familiar questions again: Who am I now? What do I want? What parts of me have changed? And what parts of me are ready to come back?

In this episode, I’m talking about the ever-changing identity of motherhood—and why maybe we aren’t supposed to “find ourselves” once and be done with it.

Maybe we’re just supposed to keep becoming.

What does it mean to let ourselves be truly seen?

In this episode of Still Becoming, I’m talking with Becky Nowak, owner of Arise Images in Asheville, about something that goes far beyond taking a good photograph: what happens when we allow more of who we are to show up in our work and our lives.

Becky shares her story of moving from a 20-year career in fitness and wellness into photography, making a major career pivot in her 40s, and learning what it means to put herself in front of the camera and build a new identity as a business owner.

We talk about:

• Why being photographed can feel so vulnerable
• The difference between headshots and personal branding
• How our relationship with our bodies affects our willingness to be seen
• Why “being photogenic” may have less to do with how we look than how comfortable we feel being ourselves
• The ways women learn to make themselves smaller or more palatable
• Bringing personality, values, and story into your business
• Giving ourselves permission to try something even when we're scared

One of my favorite ideas from our conversation is that we don't have to wait until we feel ready or confident to do the thing. Sometimes we build those feelings by doing the scary thing first.

📸 Instagram: @AriseImages
🌐 www.ariseimages.net

Becky is currently working on a new website and a rebrand, so keep an eye out for what's next!

What if you’re not lacking confidence? What if you’re waiting for permission?

In this episode, I explore the difference between confidence and permission—because sometimes we genuinely doubt whether we can do something, but sometimes we know we’re capable. We’re just waiting for someone else to make it okay.

I talk about building confidence by stepping into the “stretch zone,” trying things imperfectly, keeping promises to ourselves, and gathering evidence that we can do hard or unfamiliar things.

But I spend more time on the permission piece: the invisible permission slips we carry around about who we’re allowed to be, what we’re allowed to want, and whether it’s okay to disappoint people, change direction, rest, take up space, or become someone new.

And, fittingly, I recorded this episode the day after losing Dolly Parton—a woman who seemed to have very little interest in waiting for permission to be exactly who she was. Her confidence, generosity, creativity, and unapologetic sense of self became a beautiful backdrop for this conversation.

As we move into midlife and our priorities, relationships, bodies, and identities continue to change, I think it’s worth asking:

What do I want? And where am I still waiting for permission?

Maybe you don’t need anyone else to give it to you.

What if the very thing that's supposed to help you feel better has quietly become another item on your to-do list?

In this conversation with massage therapist Jules Beck, we explore why so many high-achieving women become disconnected from their bodies—and why reconnecting isn't about adding one more habit to perfect. We talk about the cost of constantly pushing through, how achievement culture shapes the way we care for ourselves, and why slowing down can feel surprisingly uncomfortable.

You'll also hear practical, gentle ways to begin listening to your body again, including mindfulness, body awareness, and simple practices you can weave into everyday life. Most importantly, we talk about approaching all of it with curiosity instead of pressure.

If you've ever caught yourself turning healing into another project, this episode is your invitation to pause, breathe, and remember: your body isn't asking you to perform. It's asking you to listen.

You can connect with Jules at on Instagram at space_avl or https://space-avl.com

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "I thought I'd be further along by now?"

So many of us believe healing means we'll eventually stop feeling anxious, stop getting triggered, or finally become the version of ourselves that has it all figured out. But what if healing isn't the absence of struggle? What if it's changing the way we relate to ourselves when we struggle?

In this episode, I'm talking about the quiet, often-overlooked signs that healing is actually happening—even if it doesn't always feel dramatic. We'll explore why catching the spiral sooner matters, why grief can be part of healing, why calm may start to feel safer than chaos, and how learning to stay with yourself during hard emotions is a beautiful sign of growth.

If you've been wondering whether you're making progress, I hope this conversation gives you a gentler way to measure it. Because healing isn't about becoming someone new. It's about coming home to yourself, again and again.

In this episode, I'm joined by somatic practitioner Jesse Rosenblum for a conversation that I think so many high-achieving women will relate to. If you've ever wished you could stop overthinking, quiet your inner critic, or finally get out of your head and into your life, this episode is for you.

We explore what somatic work actually is, why so many of us become disconnected from our bodies, and how slowing down can help us reconnect with our intuition, values, and authentic selves. Jessie shares practical ways to begin building body awareness, gentle somatic practices you can try today, and why self-discovery isn't about blowing up your life—it's about learning to trust yourself a little more each day.

You'll also hear us talk about people-pleasing, perfectionism, the gifts of midlife, and how even something as simple as noticing your posture or choosing clothes that feel like you can become part of your healing. If you've been craving a kinder, more grounded way of approaching personal growth, I hope this conversation leaves you feeling encouraged to pause, breathe, and remember that you're still becoming.

You can connect with Jesse on Instagram at @liminalsoma or learn more about her work at LiminalSoma.com.

In this episode of Still Becoming, we're exploring the idea of the inner child—not as a trend or buzzword, but as the younger part of ourselves that still carries our earliest experiences of love, belonging, safety, and worth. I share how this part of us can show up in adulthood, especially in parenting, relationships, perfectionism, and the way we speak to ourselves, along with why learning to respond with curiosity instead of judgment can be so healing.

We'll also talk about what it means to "reparent" ourselves in practical, everyday ways and why this work isn't just for people with obvious childhood trauma—it's for all of us. I also recommend the Instagram account @yourwisemomfriend, whose compassionate inner child videos beautifully model what this kind of self-talk can look like. If you've ever wondered why certain situations seem to hit deeper than they should, this conversation offers a gentle place to begin understanding—and caring for—the parts of you that are still becoming.

When you hear the phrase self-care, what comes to mind? A massage? A bubble bath? A day at the spa? While those soothing moments absolutely have their place, self-care is often much bigger—and sometimes much less glamorous—than the way it's marketed to us.

In this episode, I explore the many forms self-care can take, from rest and relaxation to life maintenance, boundaries, creativity, identity, and even those tasks we'd rather avoid but know will bring relief once they're done. We talk about why self-care isn't a one-size-fits-all formula, how our needs change from season to season, and why true self-care often means asking not just, "What would soothe me?" but "What would actually support me right now?"

As we move into the busyness of summer, I invite you to reflect on your own self-care habits, notice what you may be neglecting, and consider how you can care for yourself in ways that honor who you are and who you're still becoming.

Take a deep breath, settle in, and join me for this conversation on self-care beyond the spa day.

Motherhood has been the most beautiful thing I’ve ever experienced… and also one of the hardest.

In this episode, I’m joined by one of my own “emotional support moms,” Ashley Brinkman, for an honest conversation about what motherhood can feel like when our nervous systems are stretched thin. We talk about overstimulation, overwhelm, mom guilt, the pressure to get it right, and those moments where we wonder if we’re the only ones struggling.

Together we explore what’s actually happening in our bodies when motherhood feels like too much, how our nervous systems stay activated, and the small ways we try to care for ourselves and repair when we hit our limits.

We also talk about perfectionism, identity shifts, letting go of old expectations, and how deeply we need other women as we move through motherhood.

If you’ve ever felt touched out, overstimulated, disconnected, or simply exhausted by the beautiful chaos of motherhood, this conversation is for you.

You are not alone in this. And you were never meant to do it alone.