Stress Therapy Episode 9The Help You Give by Asking3/20/25In this heartfelt and deeply personal episode, Cheri Flake explores the often-overlooked power of asking for help. Through her own life experiences—especially during her husband's cancer battle—she reveals how seeking support not only uplifts the person in need but also benefits the helper. Blending psychology, spirituality, and humor, she breaks down the stigma around asking for help and encourages listeners to embrace their human need for connection and support.
Asking for Help is Healing
It's not a weakness—it’s an act of strength that allows others to feel useful and connected, while giving you the support you need.
Help Can Be Spiritual or Practical
Whether calling on a neighbor or St. Anthony, Cheri emphasizes that your help doesn't have to be human. It can be divine, energetic, or community-based.
Giving is a Stress Buster
Helping others is scientifically shown to reduce stress—so when you ask for help, you're actually doing someone else a favor, too.
~Meditation Music byhttp://sonicyogi.com
https://open.spotify.com/track/7lpLx4vtoQusvoqidRY6vN?si=0db8efd9082c40ebhttps://open.spotify.com/track/0Qotx90teY3iZ00PgUCwty?si=44a1c18c52e24e1f
Listen to Sonic Yogi on: https://open.spotify.com/artist/2xJT8mRbrqa7rTY6d4y5Fq?si=q2YYpPSzQOmu4R8-W4jkpw https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sonic-yogi/722350162https://amazon.com/music/player/artists/B00FQMVVIC/sonic-yogi?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_Y5q68A8LSQQGzl01PQC7Uaw6chttps://amazon.com/music/player/artists/B00FQMVVIC/sonic-yogi?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_Y5q68A8LSQQGzl01PQC7Uaw6chttps://youtu.be/p2jtMEkdh6g?si=rVq-Q8o85mI75S4_
INTERESTING MENTIONS:
Esther Hicks & Abraham – For woo-curious listeners, Cheri discusses their “placemat exercise” for co-creating with the universe.
Saint Shoutouts – St. Anthony (lost things), St. Christopher (travel), St. Joseph (home-selling), and Mother Mary all get love as go-to helpers.
Mother Teresa’s Take – Asking for help should be enough reason to offer support—no justifications needed.
Anne Lamott’s Book – Help, Thanks, Wow is quoted as a spiritual trifecta for approaching the divine.
The Love Tuner – A calming whistle that helps induce meditation; Cheri offers a promo code for it (just “Cheri” for 5% off).
Funny Business Fail – Cheri once tried rebranding for moms (complete with “yourearockstarmom.com”) and learned the hard way that moms don’t always want to admit they need help.
Cheri’s Aura – It’s golden yellow! (Not pink as she hoped.)
https://www.heartwood-retreats.com : location for Cheri’s Georgia Mountain Retreats
https://www.jekyllisland.comhttps://www.jekyllisland.com: Location for Cheri’s seaside retreat
The Host for this podcast: Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW The Stress Therapist and Author
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https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging!
A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW: Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media or go tohttp://www.ilovetherapy.com/ to find out about meditation classes & meditation and yoga retreats.TRANSCRIPT:The Stress Therapist: Hey, beautiful people, what's up? Today we're going to talk about asking for help. Who do you ask? Why would you ask? When do you ask? Are you ever asking? Because asking for help actually helps the person that you're asking for help, and it doesn't have to be a person.What? Okay, let's do this.Hey, beautiful people. It's time for some stress therapy.A podcast about how to meditate and get better at stress for people living.The Stress Therapist: In the real world.Finally, a place to Park. My 25 plus years of experience of.The Stress Therapist: Working as a psychotherapist in the mental health field.And now your host, me, the stress therapist, Sheri Flake.The Stress Therapist: Hey, beautiful people, what's up? Okay, so me, myself, I have been in some situations where I've had to ask for help, like, really ask for help. And I think, you know, we all know that it's really kind of difficult to ask for help for most people.And that's weird because it's one love, right? We're here for each other. We're here to lift each other up. And I think we don't want to come across as a burden.I think it's a especially hard for moms who are kind of in charge of doing all kinds of things. And a while back,I made this change with my business. It was a terrible idea. My business coach told me not to do it, and I just thought I knew better than her, and I was wrong and she was right.And I had this idea that I wanted to help moms, which is a great idea, right. But I would kind of changed my business a little bit and geared it towards mom.So I was the stress therapist for moms, right? And I had like, you know, you're a rockstar mom.com or whatever. And I had, you know, a picture of me with a guitar and the kids hanging off me crying or whatever.It was really funny, unbeknownst to me was I was targeting moms that would actually need to be able to ask for help. Okay. Because, you know, of momdom. So it's one thing to say, hey, are you stressed out?Right? People can admit to that. Yes, I'm stressed out. But she said asking moms to admit they're stressed out because they're moms is going to be difficult for them to admit to that problem.And you have to admit to the problem in order to seek help, right? So she said it's kind of like having, like an erectile dysfunction group. It's going to be difficult.You know, you have to be in the very right circles, in order to get people to raise their hand in a public place and admit to that problem. Because there's a stigma against that.You know, that's why there's Mommy Loves Vodka and, you know, all these, you know, coping or scary mommy or whatever. Like there's all these. These entities that talk about how hard it is to be a mom.And it's just now getting to be, you know, sort of an open conversation.So I. I think moms in general aren't supposed to ask for help. Women aren't supposed to ask for help. We're supposed to do all these things, I think, in general feel, you know, like it might be hard to ask for help.And I remember a long time ago, I heard, I think it was Mother Teresa, I'm not sure, but I think someone had asked her about people asking for money on the side of the street or, you know, people that were panhandling.And she said something like, you know, asking for help should be enough reason to help them. Just simply asking for it. Right? Like that. That in and of itself is such a big deal that when someone does ask for help, you know, that should be enough.They shouldn't have to give all these reasons why, what they're going to do with the money. They have signs or whatever. The simple fact that they're out there struggling and asking for help is all that you need in order to help them.And that really resonated with me. And I've had a couple of instances here lately in my life in the past five years where I have had to ask for a lot of help.And it was uncomfortable.And I learned so much from just asking for help that I want to share with you so you can kind of get some ideas on when to ask for help, who to ask for help.It doesn't even need to be a person, and we'll get into that. But a long time ago, when my husband was diagnosed with cancer, he had to undergo this massive surgery with a really long recovery.And I've talked about it before in previous podcasts, but, you know, he's, you know, had a feeding tube and only liquid diet and then soft and it just, it lots
Produced and edited by Owen Flake | Audio production, editing, and creative direction
