Stuck in the Middle Podcast

About Mariam Parineh: Mariam Parineh is the co-founder of Viva Valet, a concierge support service designed to help older adults live independently at home with dignity, confidence, and control. Drawing from decades of personal experience caring for her grandparents, her 94-year-old husband, and her aging parents spread across Iran, Malaysia, and the San Francisco Bay Area, Mariam created the “confidence aging” framework, which focuses on preserving nine types of confidence in older adults rather than just prioritizing safety and longevity.

Through Viva Valet, Mariam and her team provide confidence-informed concierge support—coordinating vetted local services, everyday tasks, and practical help—so that older adults can age in place while adult children are relieved of the “case manager” role. She also works directly with adult children as a coach, helping them release guilt, redefine their role from caregiver to cheerleader and partner, and navigate the emotional and logistical challenges of being “stuck in the middle.”

Mariam splits her life across continents and time zones, modeling what it looks like to honor elders’ autonomy while still caring deeply—and practically—for the people we love.

In this episode, Brian and Mariam Parineh discuss: 

• Confidence Aging and autonomy in older adulthood
• Emotional burden of adult children caring for aging parents
• Balancing respect for aging parents’ choices with safety concerns
• Concierge support models to help older adults age in place

Key Takeaways:

• Caring for aging parents isn’t about perfect decisions; it’s about caring. When you stop obsessing over the “right” choice and focus on genuine care, the pressure and guilt of caregiving ease.
• Respecting aging parents’ choices can matter as much as keeping them safe. Sometimes, honoring how they want to live — even when it looks risky — is the deepest form of love and respect.
• You don’t have to be your parents’ case manager to be a good child. Shifting from “manager” to “cheerleader and partner” can protect your own life, marriage, and kids while still supporting your parents.
• Aging in place works best when confidence, not just safety, is the priority. 

"Our parents have the most amount of years lived, and what we forget is that means the most life experience that they're sitting at the helm of their choices." — Mariam Parineh

Connect with Mariam Parineh: 

Website: https://www.vivavalet.com/ 

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariam-parineh-620452257/ 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mariamgetsolder/ 

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected] 



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About Michelle Walters: Michelle Walters is a digital marketing professional turned hypnotherapist whose life has been shaped by profound caregiving experiences, personal loss, and remarkable resilience. After earning her MBA and building a 20-year career working with major brands in the advertising and corporate marketing world, Michelle found herself repeatedly “stuck in the middle” — caring for partners with severe medical conditions while raising her son and maintaining her career.

Her first husband lived with cystic fibrosis and later suffered a devastating stroke. Years later, the partner she fell in love with was diagnosed with a rare blood disorder. Through these challenges, Michelle learned how mindset, intentional action, and emotional balance can help people survive life’s hardest seasons. Today, she is a hypnotherapist, author, app creator, and teacher who helps others navigate stress, grief, career uncertainty, and personal transformation with clarity and confidence.

In this episode, Brian and Michelle Walters discuss: 

• Navigating the emotional, physical, and financial realities of long-term caregiving
• How repeated adversity shaped Michelle’s resilience and purpose
• Using mindset, manifesting principles, and tangible action to create career and life changes
• The role of hypnotherapy in managing stress, grief, and personal growth

Key Takeaways:

• Even in overwhelming seasons, optimism can be cultivated — a positive mindset doesn’t erase hardship, but it strengthens your ability to endure it.
• Resilience grows when you learn to take deliberate action rather than staying stuck in fear or self-doubt; movement, even small movement, creates momentum.
• Everything is connected: your environment, your energy, your routines, and your mental patterns all influence how opportunities show up in your life.
• Careers rarely follow a perfect linear path; embracing starts, stops, and reinventions can open unexpected doors to fulfillment and purpose.

“I'm a big believer in both dreams and prayers, but the point of life is really learning how to take action for things. And if you just sit around having dreams or prayers, the universe does not take that very seriously. The Universe wants to listen to people who are actually activating things…” — Michelle Walters

Connect with Michelle Walters: 

Website: https://www.michellewalters.net/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelleoliverwalters/ 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mindpowerjunkie/ 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/michellewaltersauthor 

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@mindpowerjunkie 

Book: https://www.amazon.com/Alignment-Spirit-Finding-Work-Love/dp/1737263726 

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected] 



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About Julie Barth: Julie Barth, author of Notes from A BlackBerry, From Blackberries to Thorns, and upcoming from Thorns to Blossoms, is a mother to six children and a professional writer whose life experiences transcend the boundaries of fiction. Her journey, marked by love, loss, and an unwavering spirit, lends authenticity to her writing. Julie's narrative style is deeply rooted in her belief that life's true essence is discovered in its most challenging moments. Her work reflects a dedication to finding joy and meaning in every experience, inspiring readers to embrace their own journeys with courage and gratitude.

Julie Barth is also the CEO and founder of the Colin James Barth Outreach, a nonprofit dedicated to helping women-led households with the resources and aid necessary to find security and stability in times of crisis. Her mission is to use her experiences as a caregiver, special needs parent, and trauma survivor to encourage women in similar situations to think resourcefully and always protect themselves without stigma or feelings of selfishness.

In this episode, Brian and Julie Barth discuss: 

• Coping with emotional, financial, and physical challenges after life-altering events
• The power of community and resource networks for women-led households
• Transforming personal tragedy into purpose through charity work
• Resilience, optimism, and practical strategies for surviving crisis and rebuilding life

Key Takeaways:

• When faced with overwhelming hardship, focusing only on what’s directly in front of you can keep you grounded and help you move forward one step at a time.
• Life doesn’t always give us a choice in the cards we’re dealt, but we do have control over how we play them — with courage, resourcefulness, and faith.
• Women in crisis often fall through the cracks of available support systems; building bridges between local resources can make the difference between despair and recovery.
• Pain doesn’t have to end with suffering. When you turn it into purpose, it becomes a source of healing—not just for yourself, but for others too.

"How great of a world would it be if we all just took that little situation, did what we could to make it better, used our experience to whatever part of it, to change it so that the next person going through doesn't have to go through it. And it really is not that hard." — Julie Barth

Connect with Julie Barth: 

Website: https://www.juliebarthauthor.com/ 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/julie.e.barth 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/julie_barth_author/ 

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/juliebarthauthor/ 

The Colin James Barth Outreach: https://www.cjboutreach.org/ 

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected] 



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About Joanna Lilley: Joanna Lilley holds a Master’s degree in Counseling from West Virginia University and is a Nationally Certified Counselor. Before entering the consulting field, she spent more than a decade working with struggling adolescents and young adults through both state-run and private wilderness therapy programs. She also served as a coach for students on academic probation and worked on a university treatment team supporting students in recovery.

After years of helping young adults find stability and direction, Joanna transitioned to consulting, where she now serves as an independent matchmaker between families and the resources their young adult needs—rather than acting as the coach or therapist herself. Known for her balance of empathy, honesty, and directness, she builds trust with both parents and young adults, helping families move from confusion to clarity with compassion and transparency.

In this episode, Brian and Joanna Lilley discuss: 

• Understanding the unique challenges faced by young adults when parents are balancing elder care and work stress
• How therapeutic consulting provides neutral, qualified guidance for struggling families
• The importance of setting clear and consistent boundaries as children transition into adulthood
• Building collaborative support systems that include parents, professionals, and mentors

Key Takeaways:

• Parents must take care of their own mental and emotional health first; without stability and rest, they can’t effectively support their children.
• Boundaries are not punishments; they’re safeguards that protect both parents and young adults while fostering respect and accountability.
• Having a neutral, qualified third party, such as a therapeutic consultant or life coach, can transform family dynamics by easing conflict and restoring communication.
• Consistency between parents is vital. When caregivers present a united front and follow through on expectations, young adults feel secure and guided rather than confused or rebellious.

“If you set any type of boundary but you don't uphold it, then that's the biggest sin, because at this point, you've just allowed your child to disregard anything that you put in front of them that feels like a rule or an expectation.” — Joanna Lilley

Connect with Joanna Lilley: 

Website: https://lilleyconsulting.com/ 

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joanna-lilley-ma-ncc-12546566/ 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LilleyConsultingLLC/

Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/success-is-subjective-podcast/id1499891712 

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@LilleyConsulting/featured 

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected] 



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About Shari Ross: Shari Ross is a senior living consultant, author, and aging and caregiving resource expert who has spent over a decade guiding families through the emotional and logistical complexities of elder care. A former corporate travel director and marketing executive, she brings both professional insight from senior living communities and a personal connection to dementia care through her own family experience. Shari is the author of Senior Living Made S.I.M.P.L.E.: A Real World Guide for Navigating Senior Care for Your Loved One, a practical and compassionate roadmap designed to replace confusion with clarity. Known for her warm, no-nonsense approach, she empowers caregivers with tools, checklists, and humor to navigate one of life’s toughest transitions.

In this episode, Brian and Shari Ross discuss: 

• Navigating the emotional and logistical challenges of transitioning a loved one into senior living
• Understanding modern assisted living and memory care options
• Managing family dynamics and communication during caregiving decisions
• Using education and guided planning to reduce chaos and confusion in senior care transitions

Key Takeaways:

• Establishing a strong foundation of emotional, professional, and logistical support early in the senior care journey prevents exhaustion and confusion when urgent decisions arise.
• Following the SIMPLE framework—which emphasizes Support, Information, Mindset, Planning, Logistics, and Execution—gives families a structured roadmap that turns panic and guilt into confidence and organized action.
• The most effective way to approach resistant parents is through empathy and gradual, question-based conversations that allow them to feel respected, independent, and part of the decision-making process.
• Advances in senior living now allow residents to age in place with increasing levels of care—often including 24/7 nursing, therapy, and hospice—reducing the need for multiple disruptive moves. 

"The journey doesn’t end just when they get to the community. There’s a lot, and it takes time for your loved one to settle in. And there are a lot of bumps along the way." — Shari Ross

Connect with Shari Ross: 

Website: https://seniorlivingmadesimple.com/

Book: Senior Living Made S.I.M.P.L.E.: https://www.amazon.com/Senior-Living-Made-S-I-M-P-L-Real-World/dp/B0FFQ8J5LB

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shari-jill-ross1975/

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected]



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About Anil Gupta: Dr. Anil Gupta, internationally known as “The Love Doctor,” is a renowned relationship expert, coach, and author who has dedicated his life to helping singles, couples, and families create deeper connections and lasting fulfillment. He has spoken on global stages including Harvard, TED, and Fox News, and has shared his insights in over 18 countries across four continents, impacting audiences of more than 10,000 people. Anil has mentored celebrities, athletes, and executives, while also guiding everyday individuals toward stronger relationships, emotional clarity, and greater happiness. His bestselling book, Immediate Happiness, and widely recognized Happiness Formula continue to transform lives worldwide by offering practical tools to overcome adversity and unlock true fulfillment.

In this episode, Brian and Anil Gupta discuss: 

• The role of love, respect, and communication in healthy relationships
• Challenges couples face when balancing family, caregiving, and work stress
• Differences between therapy, coaching, and mentorship in personal growth
• The importance of forgiveness, presence, and small daily acts in building intimacy

Key Takeaways:

• Men thrive when they feel respected and women when they feel loved, so openly asking a partner “What makes you feel loved or respected, and what else can I do?” creates clarity, reduces misunderstandings, and strengthens emotional connection.
• True intimacy comes not from grand gestures but from the discipline of being fully present — setting aside distractions like phones or work stress and giving a partner undivided attention in daily interactions.
• Small, consistent acts of care, such as a spouse lovingly putting toothpaste on a toothbrush, can become powerful symbols of devotion and create long-lasting trust, comfort, and intimacy.
• Forgiveness toward partners, parents, and ourselves is not optional but necessary, because each moment we hold onto resentment or blame slowly erodes our emotional well-being and weakens our relationships. 

"In the moment you give authentically, all the pain and suffering disappeared." — Anil Gupta

Connect with Anil Gupta: 

Website: https://meetanil.com/

Book: Immediate Happiness: https://www.amazon.com/Immediate-Happiness-Practical-Proven-Results-ebook/dp/B00DAD3CMW

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anilgupta-lovedoctor/

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected]



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About Jennifer Johnson: Jennifer Johnson is a seasoned Emergency Room nurse turned bestselling author whose unique blend of intuition-driven nursing expertise and raw, lived memoirs has resonated with readers worldwide. With over seventeen years of hands-on experience in emergency departments ranging from rural single-nurse facilities to high-volume trauma centers across Ontario, Jennifer brings unmatched authenticity and emotional intensity to her work, immersing readers in the high-stakes reality of emergency medicine.

Her debut book, Nursing Intuition, has already become a must-read for healthcare professionals and general audiences alike, praised for its gripping stories that reveal not only the chaos and urgency of life-or-death moments but also the profound humanity that underpins them.

Beyond her writing, Jennifer is a strong advocate for healthcare workers' mental health and resilience. She speaks regularly at conferences and workshops, sharing her experiences to inspire and support fellow professionals. Her essays on the emotional toll of nursing and the critical importance of resilience have been featured in leading medical journals and popular publications, cementing her as both a literary voice and a healthcare thought leader.

In this episode, Brian and Jennifer Johnson discuss: 

• Navigating the emergency room experience
• The realities of patient care and treatment in urgent situations
• Differences in healthcare systems and wait times
• Preparing yourself and loved ones for unexpected medical emergencies

Key Takeaways:

• Walking into the ER without clear information often creates unnecessary panic, so knowing that if it were truly life-threatening, your loved one would already be rushed inside can help you stay calmer and make better decisions.
• Calling an ambulance in serious situations like chest pain or stroke symptoms not only gets you medical care on the way but also alerts the ER to prepare a room and treatment plan before you arrive, which can save critical time.
• Bringing a written or digital list of medications, past surgeries, and recent treatments prevents dangerous delays, because nurses cannot safely provide care without knowing exactly what a patient has taken or undergone.
• How you treat ER staff matters—patients and families who show kindness, patience, or even small gestures of appreciation tend to experience smoother, quicker care compared to those who yell, curse, or act aggressively. 

"When you’re riding high on opiates, it’s time to cut the dose back, even if this has been prescribed by a physician." — Jennifer Johnson

Connect with Jennifer Johnson: 

Website: https://www.nursejenn.ca/

Email: [email protected]

Books: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Jennifer-A-Johnson-RN/author/B0D1NBF18K

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-johnson-bscn-rn/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ernurse.jenn/

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected]



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About Gloria Vanderhorst: Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst is a licensed psychologist offering virtual therapy in Maryland and Washington, DC. With over 40 years of clinical experience, she has worked with preschoolers, teens, adults, and couples, guiding them through life’s challenges with compassion and expertise.

Her therapeutic approach integrates Emotion Focused Therapy, Internal Family Systems, and Traumatic Incident Reduction. She focuses on healing early trauma, improving emotional functioning, and strengthening relationships. Dr. Vanderhorst also supports the court system with co-parenting guidance and reunification services for families.

In her free time, she enjoys watercolor painting and playing her baroque recorder.

In this episode, Brian and Gloria Vanderhorst discuss: 

• Balancing the overlapping demands of family caregiving and personal responsibilities
• Using reflection and journaling as tools for growth and healing
• The impact of cultural expectations on men’s emotional expression
• How family stress affects the emotional needs of children and teenagers.

Key Takeaways:

• The journaling method of reading, reflecting, and responding allows people to unlock hidden memories and emotions stored in images or sensations rather than words, giving them a deeper understanding of how past experiences continue to shape their present.
• Men are socially conditioned from infancy to suppress vulnerability and emotional expression, which not only creates lifelong struggles with intimacy and openness but also leads many to rely on unhealthy coping mechanisms that manifest physically and emotionally.
• Parents who become consumed by the responsibilities of caring for aging relatives can unintentionally neglect their teenagers’ need for connection, making it crucial to intentionally carve out small but meaningful moments that reassure children of their continued importance.
• Boys naturally begin life with a wider range of emotional expression than girls, but repeated subtle withdrawals and corrections from caregivers gradually narrow that range, teaching them to mute their feelings and leaving lasting consequences on their ability to fully experience and share emotions. 

"We deny men the capability of expressing themselves emotionally. We put them in a narrow little box." — Gloria Vanderhorst

Connect with Gloria Vanderhorst: 

Website: http://www.drvanderhorst.com/

Book: Read, Reflect, Respond - The 3 Rs of Growth and Change: https://www.amazon.com/Read-Reflect-Respond-Growth-Change/dp/1633023036

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gloria-vanderhorst-ph-d-730826b 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drvanderhorst

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected]



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About John Fela: John Fela (Felageller) serves as the Ministry Relations Manager at Joni and Friends Chicago, where he partners with churches to equip and train them to better support individuals and families impacted by disability. Before stepping into ministry work, John spent nearly two decades in education, teaching and leading in roles ranging from classroom teacher to school director. He lives in Lyons, IL, with his wife, Faith, and is the proud father of his son Christopher, who is autistic and nonverbal. In addition to his advocacy, John is a sought-after public speaker, podcast guest, and contributor to special needs platforms including Key Ministry’s Special Needs Family blog, Hope Anew, and The Mighty.

In this episode, Brian and John Fela discuss: 

• Caregiving responsibilities across different generations
• Financial and legal preparation for future care needs
• Parenting a child with disabilities
• Building support systems through community and faith

Key Takeaways:

• The overwhelming monthly expenses of long-term elder care—ranging from $5,000 to $8,000—often force families to liquidate assets such as homes, leaving children without inheritance and creating financial strain that lasts for years.
• Establishing a special needs trust and working with a qualified special needs attorney ensures that children with disabilities can maintain eligibility for Medicaid and other state programs while protecting family savings for supplemental needs throughout their lifetime.
• Many families postpone critical legal steps such as creating wills, assigning power of attorney, or establishing guardianship, which results in court intervention, delays in care, and significant stress when a parent’s health suddenly declines.
• Beyond financial and legal preparation, caregivers must lean on both personal grounding—whether through faith or other belief systems—and trusted community connections to survive the emotional isolation, fatigue, and unpredictability that caregiving inevitably brings. 

"There is no such thing as too much [planning]… if you don’t have protections for your child, the system can very easily take advantage of them." — John Fela

Connect with John Fela: 

Website: http://johnfela.com/

Twitter: https://x.com/jfelageller74

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/johnsspecialneedsblog

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected]



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About Dr. Corinne Auman: Dr. Corinne Auman is a recognized gerontologist with over 20 years of experience working directly with older adults and their families and is the author of Keenagers: Telling a New Story about Aging.

She is a Nationally Certified Guardian, Certified Senior Advisor, and an Advanced Professional member of the Aging LifeCare Association. She received her Ph.D. from NC State University, where she studied developmental psychology with a specialty in adulthood and aging.

Dr. Auman speaks to audiences about aging in America and the real-world impact of age bias.

As a gerontologist with a profound commitment to making a difference, Dr. Auman continues to champion the cause of older adults and their families. Her multifaceted approach, encompassing caregiving, education, activism, and authorship, positions her as a true advocate for a new narrative around aging.

In this episode, Brian and Dr. Corinne Auman discuss: 

• Caregiving challenges faced by families juggling multiple responsibilities
• Guidance and coordination provided by care managers in eldercare
• Conflicts between independence and safety during the aging process
• Planning ahead to prepare for future aging and caregiving needs

Key Takeaways:

• Families often avoid discussing or preparing for eldercare until a crisis forces them to act, which results in costly mistakes, stress, and lost opportunities for financial support that could have been available with proactive planning.
• A care manager can serve as a central coordinator—helping families understand their options, connect with resources such as VA benefits, and make informed decisions that can prevent financial and emotional exhaustion.
• Adult children frequently face painful choices where they must prioritize safety over their parents’ desire for independence, leading to guilt and conflict, yet care managers emphasize that cognitively intact elders still have the right to make risky decisions.
• Hiring a neutral third party to evaluate care situations can ease family tensions, provide objective reassurance about safety and well-being, and create balanced solutions where both elders and adult children feel respected and supported. 

"There's always this push-pull between freedom, which is what our older adults typically want, and safety, which is what our adult children want." — Dr. Corinne Auman

Connect with Dr. Corinne Auman: 

Website: https://corinneauman.com/ & https://www.navigateseniorcare.com/

Book: Keenagers: Telling a New Story about Aging: https://corinneauman.com/books/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/corinneauman/

Host contact information: 

• Email: [email protected]



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