We hear a lot about how we must take actions in order to achieve our goals in any motivational books or personal growth seminars. On the other hand, we also know about the importance of surrender. Sometimes, the way how things turn out is not up to our desire or control. If we are fixated to a certain outcome, we may suffer for that reason.

So where do we need to draw the line?

When should we pull back and surrender to the universe?

I was listening to a podcast last week and the hosts mentioned about the book The Surrender Experiment, and that sparked my intense interest. 

There has been a theme emerging in my world since last week, the question of when do we say, it’s time to surrender versus we need to try harder?

I am very aware of the fact that surrender does not equal giving up, but it is about leaving to the universe, I have done my best, I let go. Then there is also the ideas of doing more or working smarter. 

I understand sometimes the truth of the matter is, we need to put more time and energy in a pursuit or master a skill. Often times it means self-directed effort, determination, will and perhaps, faith in yourself. These are the times we need to say we should never give up. Spiritual forces may also inspire or encourage us to push through or endure a lengthy pursue.

So taking actions is also highly important. Again, when do we know it is time to let go then? Or if we are letting go for the reasons? What if we want to quit because we are overly worried that we are investing more time and effort but only to find out we are going to fail anyway?

Where do we draw the line between Self-Acceptance and Complacency?

I was also watching an interview between Brene Brown and Tim Farris about a similar topic. And they discussed this very question.

Where is the line? How do we know we are practicing self-acceptance, which is an important part for our personal growth, and at the same time, we are not just “lazy” and stay at where we are instead of moving forward and upward? 

These questions have been lingering my mind for the entire week and I will try to answer it with what I know and understand, as well as from my personal experience. I’d love to hear what you may think about this as well. 

Reading The Surrender Experiment brought tears to my eyes while I was reading the book within a couple of days. The way how the universe unfold its miraculous power and how the author followed the flow of life, and stepped away from his personal preference were simply astounding.

It is very clear to me that if he have allowed his emotions or ego or impulsive reaction to run the course of his life, he wouldn’t have found the meditation temple, a building and construction company, a multi-billion dollar business and had so many life-changing experiences.

The fact that he let-go and surrendered to life brought him joy, peace, friendships, wealth and incredible experiences more than he could ever imaged.

What I found really clear to me is that the intention to surrender to life is a guiding principle for his actions, but he is a hard working and busy man from what I’ve read.

It doesn’t mean he was doing nothing all day long. Even in his early years of attempting to live like a helmet and in solitude, it didn’t quite happened that way.

In this interview, we talked about how to manifest with crystals and essential oils, as well as why it is so important to live in harmony with nature and respect the entire ecosystem.

Created by nature, both crystals and essential oils have a high vibration and when they are paired together and combine with positive emotions, they are very powerful support tools for us to manifest our goals or dreams

Manifesting relationship and abundance

For example, for romance and love, many people may suggest rose quartz as the common go-to crystal, while Adam recommended Rhodochrosite, which carries a different energy and intensity that helps with relationships as well.

He also shared with us a fun tip on how to use Citrine, a crystal that is well-known for attracting wealth and abundance, and pair this with bergamot essential oil. He uses this himself and money never seems to be running out since then! Adma also shared with us amazing stories of how these tools have helped him in his life!

Interview Highlights:

* How Adam becomes the teacher, author and mentor for success today* How crystals work and the use of this tool has stood the test of time and culture* Working with crystals and essential oils together + amazing stories!* Keys to manifestation: Intention, Emotions, Actions and use of these powerful support tools* Colour of the plant and its connection with the essential oil* His books: Crystal Connections and The Gift of Essential Oils (with cross-references and practical tips)* Mother nature is an ecosystem that needs our respect and care* Bushfire in Australia 2020: The importance of living in harmony with nature* How 2020 can be a transformative year as the fire also symbolises cleansing and opening the door/opportunities for more awareness

About my guest: Adam Barralet

Adam Barralet is a spiritual teacher, author and mentor for success. Many refer him as the Rock Star of the crystal community. Adam has been observing and living in tune with nature since childhood. Apart from teaching and working with crystals and essential oils, he is also highly knowledgeable with animal guides, tarot and astrology. 

Connect with Adam

Please visit his website: https://www.adambarralet.com/

Books from Adam: Crystal Connections, Gifts of The Essential Oils

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mycrystalconnections

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/adambarralet

Video

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In this podcast episode, I will share with you why it's never too late to change or dream of having a better relationship, career or health!

A Frequently Asked Question On Self-Development

Recently I ran a "Becoming A Goddess" seminar at the Mind Body Spirit Festival and I talked to some attendees after my talk. For me, becoming a modern-day goddess is about embracing a more wholehearted way of living. That means focus on personal growth and self-development. What are the things really matter to our heart? What is stirring us internal and we long to change? What is stopping us from dreaming big and challenging us to want to have more in life?

After some contemplation, there seems to be a common question around "Is it too late for me to ...?" scenario, and I want to share some coaching tips and tools about this topic. As I have seen first hand how some people can change their life around or start over or creating a bigger and better life after they reach middle age and beyond.

The short answer to this question is simply:

OF COURSE NOT

As long as you are willing to change, you have the desire and believe you deserve better, you show up and follow up with inspired action. I would NOT, it is not too late.

The reason I am saying that is that I know first hand so many people who have found love and new relationships, successful businesses, new hobbies, better health as they start to look after their internal and external being. They also found more joy and peace when they are not getting YOUNGER per se.

Louise Hay, who founded Hay House when she was over 60. She then became really keen to Latin dance in her 70s. I know many personal friends who found their partners or husbands well into their 60s.

There are so many examples around us if we just care to look.

So the question is actually, why don't do we look at those examples? What are we only drawn to negative thoughts or doubts?

It is because we are often tripped by our fear. We the loudest and most persistent critic for ourselves.

Don't let your fear to stop your personal growth

Fear of getting too old, it's too late or feeling you are too tall, too short, too skinny, too fat ... etc. There are just the most common heard negative talks that we feed into our minds.

If you keep telling yourself all that is not possible or probable, your mind keeps searching for evidence to support that claim.

Negative Bias

Also, we have a natural tendency towards negative bias, it is related to our evolution and survival instinct. We need to be well aware of the danger around us when we were agricultural or hunting tribes. But this is no longer the case, yet our brain is still hard-wired to negative bias and prevents us to dare greatly when we feel uncomfortable or push outside of our comfort soon.

I often say, the distance between our head and heart is a short one, but it may take a lifetime for some people. If we feel from our heart that we want to do change or do something new, we need to convince our brain that it is ok to do that.

Starting Over

To make a positive change in life or in some cases, start a new business, career or relationship can be overwhelming, but it is important to remember you don't always have to jump ship and take a gigantic leap. The most important step is the first one, and that can just be tipping your toes into the water, learning a little bit more about what you want or need. It can also be a refining your direction,

Today we are going to talk about the implication your archetypes may have on your romance and long term relationships. This is part of my new podcast series "Becoming a Goddess", in which I talk about Goddess, Archetype, Hero Journey, Feminine Power and how they all tie in and help you to gain a deeper understanding about yourself and decisions pattern you have. Two weeks ago on my podcast, I talked about goddess archetypes and how they may influence your career choices and motivation. You may like to check that if you are thinking about changing your career or trying to improve your current situation.

How our archetype may affect our romantic relationship?

Imagine you have the Goddess Athena as an archetype, the ultimate strategist, most likely a successful businesswoman or someone who is highly accomplished in your career or study of choice. You aren't likely to find yourself attracted to someone who doesn't have a care in the world, uninspired or just living life through motion, right?

Or as an Artemis incarnate, think of someone who is passionate about protecting our environment, bringing justice to our society, rescuing animals in nature or helping women or children in poverty. A woman who works for the right cause and vision. Do you think you will fancy someone who is putting corporate profit first or being lightweight on moral and social justice? No way, right?

I think you can see where I am going with this. Your archetypes affect your personal interests, behavioural patterns, intellectual and emotional responses as well as decision making.

What is an archetype?

In a nutshell, archetypes are our inner patterns, they reflect our unconscious choices, inclination, interests and personalities. If we understand our own archetypal influences, we can understand how we related to others and the decisions we make. By discovering our archetypes, it helps us to better understand ourselves. I wrote about the six Greek Goddess Archetypes extensively in my first book Goddess with Many Faces and today I want to focus on how they affect our relationships.

Just to mention the reason I use Goddess Archetypes is that I love the Goddess myths, they reflect the complexity of women and yet we can understand, relate and resonate with them. Many people use other archetypes, some use the Tarot system, some focus on a few women at different stages of life. I like Goddess and I found them highly relatable when I use them to explain to my coaching clients.

Anyway, the key is this - you are born with certain goddess archetypes that are dominant in your psyche, however, it may change due to your circumstances or personal growth. So, basically both nature and nurture play a part.

Now, going back to your relationship pattern, how is it helpful for us in terms of choosing our partners or creating a relationship?

Understand Your Relationship Pattern

First of all, knowing our inner patterns makes a huge difference in terms of understanding what we need to be mindful of or why we tend to fall into certain patterns.

Go back to Athena's example, she is strong-minded, a highly intellectual person, and often in a sense, disconnected from her emotional and physical body.

My 3-year- old sings and dance at her childcare and at home every day. I can see that she loves to naturally express her emotions and add all kind of imagination into her "performance". She is so happy and free when she does that. I prompted me to ask myself:

How often do we allow ourself to play, be goofy and be truly ourselves?

When was the last time you sing out loud even when we don't really know the lyrics or sure about the exact melody?

At what age we start to put that lid on ourselves, and no longer let ourselves to be free?

In my interview with Trish Watts, we talked about how singing is so freeing and nurturing for us. Especially when we have sadness or suffering stored as pain in our body. Not only it is healing, but it can also help us to connect and appreciate another human being. We also talked about InterPlay, an improvisation-based group play that uses storytelling, singing, dance, movement and stillness. I love how it helps people to open up and be free with themselves in the process.

Trish Watts is a singer, songwriter, and educator with extensive experience as a performing artist, voice movement therapy facilitator in Australia and overseas. Trish Co-Founded InterPlay® Australia, a community arts practice of almost years, and is a published songwriter and recording artist. She is co-created the startup of Cambodia Sings. She also partners with Empowering Youth Cambodia, the Music Arts School and Liger Learning Centre.

Episode Notes:

* Discover voice movement therapy as a way to express our emotions, explore our unconscious mind and our shadows in a safe and positive place.

* If you consider our mind is in our head and emotion is in our heart, voice is right in the middle. If one part says yes, the other says no, there is a constriction. Working with our voice can move it through and combine the two together.

* Emotional suffering can cause our body a lot of pain, singing can help to free up our body.

* Use breathing and soft singing to open up a dialogue to understand where the pain is stored in our body and to better understand what that pain is about. What aspect of human nature that represents?

* InterPlay has been established as a practice to unlock our body wisdom for about 30 years. It is an improvisational group play that involves storytelling, singing, dance, movement and stillness.

* It helps people to work on connection and "just takes the lid off". You can then actually appreciate the beauty of being human and the beauty of another human being in front of you and who they are.

* Why it is so nurturing when we allow ourself to play and be free from judgement.

* Cambodia Sings: A youth program to bring back the joy of singing and the love of singing for all of Cambodians.

If you would like to connect with Trish Watts or any of the work we mentioned, please visit:

What is your Goddess Archetypes?

First of all, you may ask what an archetype is. If you are a fan of Carl Jung, the Swiss scholar, psychologist and psychiatrist, you may be familiar with the terms such as archetype or collective unconscious. In my first book Goddess with Many Faces, I wrote about 6 Greek Goddess Archetypes: Athena, Artemis, Demeter, Persephone, Hera and Aphrodite. They are among the most well-known Greek goddesses in our popular culture, many of us are familiar with their images or myths. They each have a very distinctive archetypal influence.

I want to revisit these goddesses as I now have more to share with you and as I am writing my second book called Being a Goddess. I am going to do this is as a multiple part series. Today I want to talk specifically about our career motivation and inner calling for women based on these goddess archetypes.

How does your archetype affect your career?

So here is the context, archetypes are our inner patterns, they reflect our unconscious choices, inclination, interests and personalities. If we understand our own archetypal influences, we can understand how we related to others and why we are, the way we are. By discovering our archetypes, it helps us to better understand ourselves. You'll notice use the plural form to describe our active archetypes. This is because although we have one dominant archetype at any given time in our life, we can also see we have traces of other archetypes in us too. Also, as we grow and mature, the most active archetype in us may change. And both, nature and nurture play a part in this, it is not just we are born with one dominant archetype, and that's it.

In any case, you will know what I mean when we go through a brief overview of these archetypes in this podcast. I will talk about the typical career choices and tendencies for each goddess archetype. Also, what qualities of a job or career will motivate each archetype and inspire a more fulfilling career.

I use Goddess archetypes because I found their myths really resonate with our women experiences. Also, many of us are familiar with their stories, and the message can really hit home quickly. There are many archetypes out there, but I only focus on these six here.

Athena: Goddess of Wisdom 

Athena Archetype: The Strategist

In mythologies, Athena's father is Zeus, the chief God of Olympus, her mother is Metis, the goddess of wisdom also. Zeus values Athena highly and untrusted her with his symbols of power, in which no other gods or goddesses had that privilege. Athena appears in many epic hero stories alongside Odysseus or Hercules. She provided them with wise counsel and caution them with danger. I don't have time to go through the myths here, but they are fascinating to read. Once again, in you love myths, you can find more details and stories in my book Goddess with Many Faces, of course!

Athena was known for her intellect, wisdom, winning strategies and practical solutions. As an archetype, Athena is patient, she sees the whole picture, she is focused and efficient. Athena values rational thinking, will and knowledge over instinct and nature. This pattern is followed by logical women, who are ruled by their heads rather than their hearts. She thrives in the city and patriarchy culture and organisations. She is the "father's daughter", an Athens's father is always very proud of her achievement. Growing up,

What does the word "Goddess" mean to you?

Since I completed my first book, Goddess with Many Faces, I felt it was like the end of a beginning.  As I completed the book, I knew I need to do a follow-up book that will help women to apply what they have discovered about themselves, their archetypes, their innate feminine power and wisdom, and take it another step further and apply them the context and practice of key areas of their everyday life. 

And that is how the idea of my current book, Becoming a Goddess was born. In the last few months, I have been doing a lot of research, learning and interviewing different experts and coaches, and that’s why I am doing this new series of the podcast "Becoming A Goddess". I want to share my insights and what I’ve learned from other coaches and experts in the field. 

A Goddess is the embodiment of an inspired and empowered woman, who is called to create a life she loves, to find success and joy in both her career and personal life, which includes healthy relationships and personal well-being.

A woman who looks after herself and grow into even wiser, more beautiful and powerful inside and outside as she matures. She embraces her feminine power, goddess wisdom and become a radiant, magnetic, nurturing and creative woman. This is what Becoming a Goddess is about.

I want the book to be inspiring and useful for women who want to create the life they truly love.

3 Keys to becoming more Inspired, Empowered and Radiant

In this episode, I will share with you the 3 keys that are common practices among the women I've interviewed, who have achieved what they could only dream of a few years back, and they are women whom I can call have now become a woman that they always wanted to be, a Goddess. 3 keys I find that have helped many women I interviewed who have achieved what they dreamt of a few years back, and people whom I would call have now become a woman they always wanted to be, a Goddess. 

I want you to remember - YES, you can have it all, and you are more than you know. From all my research and interviews with truly inspiring women, here are the top 3 common things I want you to know right now: 

Know who you are - what truly matters to your heart. 

When you know yourself better, what really motivates you, what scares you and if you have a dream, know your “ Why", all that gives you clarity, and then priority to make progress in areas that will fill the gaps and help to you get you where you want to be. Knowing your archetypes help. Understand your motivation and interests help. If you don’t know what you deeply want, think about what keeps you curious, what makes you eager to learn and what you like to do that you will lose track of time. 

Break Down Your Big Dream into Small Tangible Steps

When something you want to change, do or accomplish seems so important and so big, to the point where you feel stuck or paralyzed with the fear. You need to break it down to one tiny small step at a one.  One action item, something you can do in 15-30 mins. And do it Today. Schedule it. Commit to it. Once you are done, the next tiny step. You need to take action to create the momentum and that will eventually move you forward away from confusion or anxiety.   

Make time for your life 

I remember those days when I was single, losing my patience and feeling sorry over unsuccessful relationships. I was not sure how to go back to dating and felt totally stuck at where I was.

I wish I have met Crista back then!

She made it sounds so fun and got me super excited about dating again! Well, this is more for the single ladies out there, as I am happily married, but I cannot help it but to cheer you on the side! 

If you are single and wondering how can you find real love, then this episode is totally for you!

Crista Beck is a love & dating expert & coach with over 10+ years of experience in helping single women to find true love in real life. Her message has been heard by over a million people globally. Crista Beck, known as the “Love Radar” has been featured on ABC, NBC, FOX, and TEDx. She is the author of the bestselling book, Break The Glass Slipper: Free Yourself of Fairytale Fantasies and Find True Love In Real Life. 

In this paradigm-shifting dating guide, Crista Beck shows us how to stop Hollywood and Disney from ruining our love lives so we can find love in real life. Break The Glass Slipper is her antidote to the myths about the process of dating that have infected modern society and the minds of single people, sabotaging our ability to attract a healthy and happy long-term relationship. 

It was an absolute joy to interview Crista and talked about dating coma and fairytale fantasies. What she has discovered with her years of experience she put into the book and her coaching work to help women getting back to their date scene. She coaches women to find healthy long-term relationships.

She makes dating sounds so fun and “do-able” especially for those who may have been put off or haven’t been dating for 2, 5 or even 10 years!

It is all about taking the baby step! 

If you would like to take a baby step towards your next relationship today, you can also take her free Love IQ quiz at https://datingiqquiz.com 

Or you can get her book Break The Glass Slipper: Free Yourself of Fairytale Fantasies and Find True Love In Real Life here at http://cristabeck.com/break-the-glass-slipper/ 

If you would like to contact Crista Beck and learn more about her work and coaching, please visit http://cristabeck.com/

Episode Notes: 

* In Break the Glass Slipper, you expose the societal fantasies about dating and relationships. How did you discover these? * What are the top unhealthy fantasies that single women buy into?* How do we truly know who and what qualities we want? * What do you say to “He is not my type” when we don’t even know our type or we think we know? * How can our single listeners/viewers find love (even ...

As Valentines Day and my wedding anniversary (13th February) are fast approaching this week,, I can't help but think about my marriage.

Valentines Day is the busiest day of my husband's business, therefore we never get to celebrate that or our anniversary on the day but we try to make a point to spend some quality time together later in weekend or after.

2019 marks a big year for us, we have been physically and emotionally challenged in so many ways and it certainly asks for a stronger and more supportive relationship. So, I thought to myself, what can I learn from all these valuable lessons and if anything that comes up useful, I'd share them on my podcast. So that's what prompted me to talk about in this week's podcast.

For me, the following 5 tips are what really helped me and my husband to get through insanely busy work schedule, long-distance travels and blindspots.

1. Embrace Vulnerability and Imperfection

I was reading Brene Brown's book Daring Greatly, and one of the stories about a man who came up to her after a talk about how hard it is for men to share about shame and vulnerability deeply touched me. How he viewed his wife and daughter couldn't bear the sight or the thoughts of him if he would crumbling down in tears right there. Another one talked about how he couldn't tell his wife he was been lay off from work for quite some time, he just went to the cafe during work hours to find a new job. His Dad, brother and close male friends knew, he just couldn't tell his wide. He said: "She didn't sign up for this."

I talked about the stories I read in the book with my husband and I said to him: "If work becomes too stressful, or you feel overwhelmed with too much weight on your shoulder or something "bad" happened, you got to talk to me. I didn't just sign up for this, I signed up for more". I don't care if we need to sell the house or be creative with things, I don't want to lose him on the inside.

I think it is important to know what you truly value in life, hence, fear to lose the most. It is confronting and uncomfortable to feel vulnerable, but that is also a way to live with love and courage.

It is one thing to tell our husband or boyfriend that we want them to open up and share more about their feelings and fears, but when it comes to the hard truth, many men believe we may not be able to bear it or even actually want to hear the hard truth. So we need to be honest with ourselves as well. Are we willing to feel vulnerable, to face our own imperfection, character default, mistakes, fears and most importantly, are we there for THEM for the long run.

You don't stumble into a warm and cozy relationship, you need to work on it. You may be lucky enough and stumble into a suitable candidate to commit to cultivate one.

If you want to feel more connected with your boyfriend/partner/husband, you got to be in the arena, whether it is about wrestling with your own vulnerability and share that with him or listen and respect his. You got to be there and let him know that too.

2. Be clear and committed with your work and personal boundaries

If you want a good work-life balance, personal & spiritual growth and massive success with your work, this is probably the number one commitment to nail.

For some, this may mean the number of days/weeks you are willing to travel away from home for work, or how many hours you spend in the office vs. home, whether or not you work in the weekend and if so,

When life throws you a curveball, it is a call for an adventure.

I've known Margie for years. We met at various conscious business or health & wellness festivals and events. She always struck me as the most passionate and energetic person in the room. Margie is a lymphatic drainage and remedial massage therapist, author, award-winning herb expert and Qigong instructor. She always got new things to share and explore. I love watching her talking to people and laughing with them. The Margie I know was full of beams and always BUSY.

Then, she disappeared from the scene for months. I read some of her Facebook posts and heard that she got sick. I wasn't sure about the details but was aware that she was overseas for quite some time. After many months of no news, I saw her recently at a business event. Margie is back!

But before I got to talk to her personally, I was just watching her across the tables and I couldn't help but noticed her skin was glowing and she looked "different" as in younger and healthier. I know for sure she has bounced back, I just didn't know what happened and what she did to "make it back".

We finally caught up at the end of the event and I was amazed by her story and results. I was thrilled to invite her to come to my show and get her to share her story with us. So here it is my interview with Margie:

Episode Notes:

* A passionate and energetic health care practitioner who got sick and had to stop all work* From constant headaches, brain fog, pain & ache in joints, poor sleep to perfect health again* What is Lyme Disease, symptoms and causes* Her journey back to health * Oxidative Stress* Anti-ageing effects * A silver lining in the mess: a new business, better skin and hair! * It's not about selling but sharing a woman's journey on health and prosperity

If you would like to get in touch with Margie please go to www.NatureHealth.com.au or connect with her on Facebook @ Margie Hare

https://youtu.be/lo3YlnohNSE

Transcript

Sze Wing:         Hi, everyone. I am so happy today because I want to talk to Margie. And we know each other for a while now. So for those who don't know her, I will have a very quick short introduction. So first of all, I will say, really, she has lots of different skills. So I'm just going to list them out here, but we're going to talk something more specific in a minute. So first of all, she's a highly-skilled aromatherapist. She's a specialist in manual lymphatic drainage and remedial massage therapist. She's an author, award-winning herb expert and Qigong instructor. She's also the founder of NaturalHealth.com.au. She's basically a professional in the health and wellness industry who is one of the most energetic and passionate people I met. And every time I ask her, "How are you going?" she would say, "Oh, well, I mean, it's busy. It's crazy." And to be honest, I never expect Margie is going to tell me, "Oh, I've just got nothing to do." So I love her energy, and she's always 110% in anything that she does. So I'm really excited to talk to her today to hear about her new adventures. So welcome to my show.

Margie:            Thank you, Sze Wing. It's lovely to

reconnect with you.

Sze

Wing:         Yeah. We met quite a few

years ago, and at different events. We always had a great chat. And I remember

she also sold some herbs from her organic garden, which I love. She had all

these beautiful things around and she is in so many different modalities. I